A/N: Here it is! The next chapter. This one feels really different to me than the others, but I hope it's a good different and not a "the magic is gone" kind of different. Let me know if the magic is gone. I just felt this is where my characters were leading me. I feel this story wrapping up pretty soon, which is amazing because I think I started it like a week and a half ago, and I never write stories this quick, but this one just seemed to blossom. I am really glad it's not a one shot. I like it the way it is now.
Please review and let me know what you think! To those of you who have reviewed faithfully thus far--THANK YOU! You're the reason I keep writing as fast as I do, rather than ignoring the little Pam/Jim in my head saying "hey do this!"
Pam sat at her desk watching him. He was so cute, sitting there watching his phone like if he willed it enough it would ring. She had to chuckle to herself watching him. He was so different at work than he was at home. It was almost like there were two different Jims. It wasn't that she didn't fully appreciate and adore the one at home, but the one at work was the Jim she knew the best. Sometimes, when she got the chance, she liked to just stare at him, marveling at how he could look the same, yet act so different.
At work, Jim tended to care less. He was a bit more flighty with what he did and tended to speak out of turn more often. He was more boisterous, if boisterous was the right word for Jim. At home he was careful, reserved. He let her take the lead. He listened to her, let her talk. He was kind, considerate. She'd fallen in love with Office Jim, but she thought, maybe, if she was given the chance, she could fall in love with At Home Jim too.
It had been two months since he'd rescued her, and she'd felt more alive today than any day before. Last night, they'd watched Office Space, which was probably one of Jim's favorite movies to watch after a long, hard day at work. She remembered watching the scene where Peter was talking to his psychiatrist, and he said that every day he was living the worst day of his life. She'd thought as she was watching it how miserable his life must have been, when she was reminded that had been her life just a few months ago. It seemed odd to her that now, every morning she woke up she was living the best day of her life.
And she knew a lot of it was thanks to him.
She could feel how much she was changing. Every day seemed like a new opportunity, a new chance for her to learn something and change her ideas about the world. She'd felt so liberated over the course of the past few weeks. It was as if all of the walls of lies that had been built into her system had come down. They hadn't crashed down. They hadn't left her feeling weak and empty. But it was as if the bricks from the walls had been taken down one by one, leaving her feeling lighter, able to fly and ready to take on the world.
Her eyes were still fixated on the side of his head when she saw him rise. Her breath caught in her throat a bit, and her mind raced. She could feel blood rushing to her cheeks and she quickly looked down at her keyboard, unsure as to why her body was reacting the way it was. Okay, so she knew why it was…
He leaned over her desk, grabbing a jelly bean from the jar and popping it in his mouth. "Hey," he said coolly and she looked up, trying to keep her smile from invading her face. "I had a question."
"Shoot," she said, looking up at him.
"Would you like to go to dinner with me tonight?" He asked. Her heart raced, but she was sure he was just asking like he always did. Every night.
"You mean like we do every night? Um, sure."
"No, I mean, can I take you out to dinner tonight… On a date," he clarified, twiddling his thumbs. She looked up at him, a huge smile forming. She could feel her heart rate speed up and the color coming back to her cheeks again.
"Of course you can. You have to pick me up, though." She said, teasing him.
"Okay, well… I'll pick you up at seven…" He said, turning to walk away. Not a second later he turned back around and winked at her, "in the living room."
She smiled and watched him leave, unable to believe he had seriously just asked her out on a date. They'd had lengthy conversations about the two of them dating. He'd told her countless times he was in love with her and had made it so obvious what his intentions were that she could hardly believe he hadn't already asked her down the aisle. She'd told him a few times that she was ready to date him if he asked. She wouldn't say no. He'd told her he was going to wait to ask her until he felt she was ready. She'd argued with him about it then, but he'd seemed adamant. He didn't want to rush her into a relationship. Her mind drifted back to the Jerry Maguire scene and she smiled, realizing that he was waiting for her to develop her status as a complete person before asking her to be a part of his incomplete life.
She heard her phone buzz on the counter, and she looked over at it, unsure what to think. Hardly anyone called her at this hour, and the last time she'd gotten a text message had been a while ago. She opened her phone up to see a text message from a mysterious caller known as Phat Halpert. She laughed to herself, knowing he must have reprogrammed his number into her phone last night. She read the message silently to herself: Wear something that makes you look beautiful. I guess you have limitless options.
She smiled and looked over at him, not surprised to find he was looking right back at her, grinning like a little kid on Christmas.
Pam stood in front of the mirror, curling her hair with the iron she'd picked up a few days ago on her trip to Target. She hadn't gotten any new hair or makeup supplies for over a year since she and Roy had been saving for the wedding, but with Roy out of the picture and a new man in her life, she'd thought she could splurge a little. Not that Jim would care what she looked like, he'd made that quite obvious, but every now and then she wanted to look nice for him. She'd decided that in light of this being their first date, she'd fancy herself up a bit more.
She smiled at herself in the mirror. She was wearing a light green sweater with dark brown pants. She had a scarf wrapped around her neck, green, brown, red and blue striped, and her hair was down, the curls ending right past her shoulder. She'd done her make-up and taken special care to make sure she looked for Jim how she would if he'd asked her out and they didn't live in the same house. She felt a bit more of a pressure to dress up for him. He'd done so much for her these past few months, she wasn't sure how to thank him.
She put her diamond earrings in, letting out a small grunt when they stabbed her ear in the wrong place. She wrapped the bracelet he'd given her years ago for her birthday around her wrist, smiling as it glistened in the light. Roy had never let her wear it. She wasn't sure why. It was only a cheap little bracelet you could find on the shelves of a department store, but still, she loved it. She smiled at herself in the mirror, giving herself a quick check before leaving the small adjoining bathroom she'd called her own for the past few months.
She glanced at the bedside clock and smiled. 7:15. Of course she was late, she was the girl. If Jim was a man at all, he would know that 7:00 meant he should be there then and expect her between ten and 20 minutes afterwards. She slipped her shoes on and grabbed her jean jacket, slipping it over her shoulders before starting her walk downstairs. She noticed Jim sitting on the couch, staring at the fireplace as if he hadn't seen it before. Suddenly, he turned, watching her, and she thought she saw his mouth open slightly, yet no words came out.
He stood up, wrinkling his pants and walking over to her, offering his hand to her. "Flowers for you, milady," he said and bowed a little. She let out a small giggle, taking the flowers for him and smelling them. Daisies. The happiest flower, she knew. She took in a deep breath of them and took one out, placing it behind her ear.
"Let me go put these in water," she smiled, letting go of his embrace and running to the kitchen. She thought how strange it was to have flowers. Nobody had ever given her flowers before, even Roy in the many years they'd dated had never given her flowers. She took one last sniff of them before setting them in a vase and placing them on the kitchen table. She then returned to Jim, trying to hide the smile that had become so natural in the past few weeks.
He smiled and took her hand. "You look…" He trailed off, as if he was unable to find the right word. She stared up at him, knowing what he wanted to say, but still daring him to say it. "Beautiful?" he tried. She continued to stare at him, trying to keep her grinning under control. "Stunning? Ravishing? Delectable?" A soft laugh escaped her lips as he opened the door for her, leading her to his car.
She'd become used to this Jim that opened doors for her. The one that was a complete gentleman at all times, regardless of how he was feeling or how horrible she was acting toward him. It was still strange to her, watching him and remembering her dating experience. She'd never had anyone open the door for her before Jim. It wasn't that she wasn't capable, it was just a nice gesture on his part. She couldn't stand those women who always complained about how they were able to open their own doors and it was sexist t allow men to do it for them. Sometimes, she liked it when a man played the hero and she got to be the damsel in distress. Sometimes, not all the time.
She stared out the window, silently thinking about her life up to this point. She thought about how everything was so connected. She thought about how even the horrible moments of her childhood had prepared her for right now. How simple things like her favorite color or where she lived had completely altered her life. She thought about how everything led to something greater, and she was so excited that they'd led her to Jim.
Her thoughts were interrupted by his voice. "What are you thinking about?"
"You really want to know?" She turned to him, smiling. She knew he did. She just liked to hear him say it.
"Of course," he replied, hands on the wheel. She loved how carefully he drove with her in the car. She knew he drove fast and dangerously when she wasn't there, but he had always told her she was 'precious cargo,' and he wouldn't dare put her at risk.
"I'm thinking… that it's so fascinating how everything is connected… In life, I mean… It just doesn't seem to be a complete coincidence."
"What do you mean?" he asked, and she could feel her heart racing and her mind processing information over and over again.
"I just keep thinking… I was born into this family with this horrible father who taught me to be submissive and hated having kids around so he sent me to this summer camp every summer, where I met Roy… Then Roy was a jerk and got me to apply for a job at Dunder-Mifflin which led me to you which led me to break up with Roy, which puts me in this car right now. And wherever this car takes me is going to change my life, hopefully, and then maybe some day I'll tell my kids about…" she trailed off, knowing she was going way into the future, into territory they'd had yet to even begun to bridge. "…this part of my life, and maybe somehow that will influence them and…" she was getting excited now, jumping up in her seat thinking of the prospects of what everything being connected meant.
"And you think it's all too… coincidental for it to have just happened," he finished for her, looking at her.
"Yeah." She said, chewing on her thumbnail, thinking. She was staring straight ahead, almost like they were in one of those road-trip movies where all you could see was the blue sky over the hills and the farm animals mooing in the background. But she wasn't staring into that. She was staring simply at the road ahead of her, cars buzzing by and green lights and red lights. He loved how she could bring the simplest of all life into the business of any day.
"I tend to agree," he said, turning into the restaurant where he'd planned on taking her. "Is this alright?" she nodded and he smiled, running around to her side and opening the door for her, helping her out of the car. He led her into the restaurant and they were seated quickly. He handed her a menu and she took it, opened it and looked at it for a moment before she started talking again.
"You haven't told me much about your family yet," she said softly, looking at him. He smiled and started to tell her when the waitress came by.
"You know what you want?" he asked her, and she looked surprised. He wondered what the Bambi look was for until she opened her mouth.
"You mean I get to pick?" she asked, and he laughed softly, nodding. She looked down at her menu quickly, her eyes lighting up. "I've never gotten to pick on a date before…. Mmm…" Finally she ordered and it took all of his might to stifle his laughter at how cute she was. He couldn't believe she was 27 years old and had never picked her own meal out on a date before. The surprise in her voice was both adorable and sad.
"So, tell me about your family," she said softly.
He laughed, unsure of how to even begin. "Well, I have two sisters. Julia's older and Jenna's younger. My parents really liked the J names…" She laughed and thought back to the pictures on his fridge.
"Charlotte and Anna are Julia's, right?" She asked.
"Yes. They're both married. Julia got married a few years before she had Charlotte and Jenna was married last summer… You might remember me talking about the wedding. I was in it, but I was looking for a date."
"Oh, right… I almost volunteered," Pam said softly. "Too bad I didn't."
He smiled at her and continued. "Julia is only two years older than me, and Jenna's a baby. She's only 20. I was always closest with Julia growing up. I was the pesky little brother that stole all of her friends and took them on dates." They laughed lightly, and then he continued. "My parents only wanted two children. Dad wanted all boys; Mom wanted all girls… Then they got into some fight about something and Mom decided that the only way to solve it was to have another baby. The sex of the baby would determine who was right. And then Jenna came along and from then on, Dad was wrong… I'm not really sure how it all worked… Now, I'm actually pretty sure that was crap…" He laughed and she smiled at him.
"Do you want kids?" she asked softly, taking a sip of her water out of nervousness.
"I do. I don't want them with the wrong person, though… But yeah, if it's with the right person, I'd love to have kids." She smiled, unsure of how to respond to that. "You?" He asked.
"I absolutely want kids," she replied softly. "I'm not sure how to elaborate on that, I just… It seems so natural to me, to want kids. But it's something I've only wanted recently… When I was with Roy, I never wanted them. Now all of a sudden I do."
He smiled at this. He knew what she meant. It was only with her that he'd ever consider having children.
"Well, I'm sure you'll get them." He replied, before continuing. "So, my mom sold staplers and my dad sold three hole punches…" She kicked him under the table and laughed.
"Tell the truth." He smiled at her, unsure how to continue with this great revelation.
"Okay, my Dad was a salesman at this company, I can't remember the name. My mom was the beautiful secretary, or as you say, receptionist, that he worked with for years. He was engaged, she was madly in love with him, broke up the wedding, they got married and have lived happily ever after."
"You're joking." She said softly, looking down at her plate.
"Nope." He replied, reaching across the table and taking her hand. "Why do you think I'm so sure we'll work out?"
"Work out?" She asked, looking up at him.
His heart raced. He was about to put it all on the line. Not that he hadn't done it before, but it was different, doing it on a date. They were dating. They were in a relationship now. This could actually happen, and he was scared of how she'd react. It was really soon, after all. "You know... The whole shebang. Me proposing to you romantically, a quiet wedding, us riding off into the sunset, having lots of babies together, raising them in a house with a terrace, watching them grow up, get married, have babies. Growing old and dying in each others arms… Work out.. Like that."
He looked up at her, scared to see how she'd react. He was pleasantly surprised to find the wide smile on her lips, her eyes slightly glossy, and a look of absolute love planted across her face.
"Okay." She replied, and he smiled, knowing the conversation was over. Nothing more needed to say. All he needed to hear was in that okay, and all she needed to say was in it as well. He smiled, knowing that it was going to work out. She broke his concentration by continuing.
"You know what I was thinking about today?" she asked.
"What?" He replied, sure it was something that was going to make him laugh at how adorably funny she was.
"You know all of those couples that were friends first and then they break up and they're not friends anymore? The damage was too much?" She asked and he nodded, unsure how he felt about where this was going. "I can't imagine you ever doing something to me that I wouldn't want to be your friend afterwards," she said, nibbling on her thumbnail. "I just think we can survive anything."
He smiled. "That's because we already have," he said softly. She smiled up at him, holding his gaze for a moment.
"Can I ask you something? It's going to be awkward," she broke the silence.
"I love awkward," he said, his face dead-panned.
She laughed, and he smiled. Hearing her laughter always made him happy. There was nothing that could happen to him that her laughter wouldn't fix. "Um, my house…" She said, and he knew immediately where they were. "I just… With Roy gone, I can move back now."
"Do you want to move back?" Jim asked, silently hoping she would say no. He'd foolishly hoped they'd just keep going the way they were, not having to talk about this, just both of them accepting that their life was together, not apart.
"I don't want to impose on you," she said.
He shook his head, "You're not. You're welcome to stay with me until the day you die. Maybe even a bit after." She smiled, and he could tell she was thinking.
"You're not just being kind, are you? Because, really, Jim, it's no problem for me to move back. If you want your house back, it's totally fine." She looked down, and he could tell she was almost expecting him to redact his offer. To tell her he wanted a bachelors pad. To tell her he wanted to be alone in his own house; he didn't want to have to worry about her.
"Pam, if I wanted you gone I would have said so. I like having you there. I'd be fine if you never left. I don't want you to leave, but if you want to, it's okay."
She sighed. She hadn't meant to hurt his feelings, but she could tell she kind of had. "I don't want to leave, Jim… I just wanted to make sure that's what you wanted before I went off and sold my house."
He looked up at her, grinning. "Really? You're thinking of selling it?"
"Well, what good does it do me to pay a mortgage on it if I'm just living with you?" She asked, smiling. "Might as well make some profit off of Roy being a jackass." He laughed along with her, both of them completely enjoying each other, the topic of Roy not stinging a bit.
"What are you going to do with the profit?" he asked her, smiling.
"No idea." She said, laughing through a mouthful of her chicken pasta. "Any suggestions?"
"Just one." He replied, smiling. "Hold on to it. You might have a wedding to pay for someday soon."
She watched him as he ate, smiling. He'd really just said that? Soon? And he hadn't said she might be engaged soon. He hadn't said she might get laid soon. He hadn't said she might be married soon. He'd said she might have a wedding soon. Something Roy had never wanted. He'd wanted the sex, and however he could get it, that's how he'd do it. He'd wanted to control her and to own her, both legally and emotionally. He'd never wanted a wedding. He'd never wanted to stand up and publically announce his love for her. And while Jim hadn't said when her wedding was going to be, she could feel he meant what he had said. It would be soon. And while he hadn't said who it would be with, she was positive he had meant it would be with him, too.
Review please! The second half of that was definitely not what I expected to happen, but I really hope you liked it! Let me know if you want to hear more about Jim's past, or if you just want to skyrocket forward, or whatever. I'll make it happen, maybe ;)
