I know you reviewers are waiting for the first blood, so here it is. Keep in mind that this is satirical because of what Chris Pronger did in Edmonton when he played for the Oilers. I do not wish any ill coming towards Chris, this is purely in fun. Enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters in the story nor do I own the Friday the 13th concept. But I wonder what it would be like to own Peyton Manning (LOL just kidding, I don't think his wife would appreciate that).
… Jason stalked around the grounds in the direction of the sound he had heard. He was annoyed at the fact that something interrupted him from watching the cabin. There was going to be hell to pay for the distraction. Lightning illuminated the sky, making a trail for Jason to follow.
The sound of splashing water ensued and Jason reached for his machete as he headed for the lake. Sure enough, he saw a naked male swimming in the lake.
'Naked man in lake bad' Jason thought, confused as to why someone would go skinny dipping in a thunderstorm. 'Must kill naked man'
As he approached the lake, he recognized the man, lowering his machete.
'Jason see Chris Pronger' he thought, watching the all-star NHL Defenseman swim around gracefully 'Chris Pronger screw over NHL team. Must kill Pronger'
Jason stalked slowly to the lake, wielding his prized machete high as he came closer to his victim, who was standing at the shore with his back turned.
'I kill you, Pronger' Jason thought as he snuck behind the naked NHL Player 'I kill you'
With that, he impaled Chris with the machete through his lower back, twisting it to slash his internal organs. With a slight gurgle, Chris fell to the ground, blood gushing out of his mouth and nose. He was dead as soon as he fell to the ground.
'Jason good boy mommy' Jason thought, pulling his machete out 'Jason kill evil Chris Pronger'
"That's my good boy" Pamela Voorhees' voice said though his subconscious "That's my good Jason. Now hide the body"
He then proceeded to drag Chris' bloodied body across the sand and shale…
… Even after a long while, we lay in my bed, still pressed together…neither of us daring to move as the lightning illuminated the room. The sound of the hard rain pressing against the roof was relaxing.
"Peyton" I whispered, enjoying the feeling of his chin against my left shoulder "Are you still awake?"
"Yep" he whispered, his breath falling against my ear "What's on your mind?"
I smiled.
"I thought this week would resume crappily" I whispered, still smiling as the room was illuminated again "But you're making it so much better"
"Anything to put a smile on a fan's face" he said softly, brushing a strand of hair away from my ear. I shifted in his arms and rolled around to face him.
"Something tells me you don't cuddle like this with every single fan" I said, giving him a look as he brushed a strand of hair away from my face "Fess up, Peyton"
"Maybe I like you" he said, smirking at me "Maybe I like your smile too"
"Maybe?" I said in a voice that was somewhere between hopeful and playful "Only maybe?"
He said nothing as he moved his face closer to mine. Lightning illuminated the room, giving me a good look at his sensual lips. I noticed with amusement that his lower lip was much fuller and twice as sensual. A shiver reverberated up and down my spine as I instinctively moved my face closer.
Unfortunately, as soon as our lips touched, a scream rang out. We pulled away and both sat up quickly in bed.
"What the hell is going on?" I whispered, watching the light in Kristy's cabin turn on.
"I don't know" Peyton said, concerned "Stay put, I'll go check it out"
"No" I whispered, grabbing his arm as we heard a knock on the door "What if there's something wrong?"
"Someone open the door!" I heard Kristy shriek "Open the fucking door!"
I got up and ran to the door as fast as I could. I then opened it to reveal Kristy holding Tom by his ear. Judging by the indignant expression on her face, it wasn't pleasant.
"To what do I owe this dubious pleasure?" I said, eyeing Tom, who looked livid.
"Let's just say I woke up and he was on top of me, his hands on my tits" Kristy said angrily shoving him into the cabin "What a pig!"
"Yeesh I just wanted to see if those double Ds were real" Tom said, groaning as he flopped onto his bed "Your friend here is on 'roids!"
He then noticed Peyton lying in my bed, underneath the covers as I apologized to Kristy.
"What is this?" he demanded, glaring at Peyton "Thought you were sleeping on the couch"
"None of your fucking business" I snapped as Kristy left "What is your problem anyways?"
"I am a man and I have needs!" Tom exclaimed, giving me a dirty look "If you weren't such a bloody tease all the time"
"Get over yourself" I groaned, locking the door before limping back to bed "You act like you're God's gift to women."
"That's because I AM God's gift to women" Tom said, puffing out his lower lip like a defiant child "Not that you would notice"
"Just get to bed, will you?" I said, climbing into bed beside Peyton "We all need to sleep."
"Yeah" Peyton agreed, as I settled back in "Or is that too much to process, you prima donna?"
"Go suck a football" Tom grumbled, settling in under the covers.
'Good night to you too' I thought, rolling my eyes as Tom soon started snoring.
"Well" Peyton said, as I rolled around to face him again "Looks like its gonna be a long night"
"Yep" I said, wishing I could put a pillow over Tom's face "I guess we'll have to make the best of it"
Those words brought an evil smile to Peyton's face. He then moved his face closer.
"Where were we?" he said, licking his lips in anticipation.
Without warning, I pressed myself into him for a very intense kiss. One would think that it started out soft and unsure, but it was a very intense, yet teasing sort of kiss. It definitely lasted for several minutes before we both pulled away, breathing hard.
"Wow" I said, trying to catch my breath "That was incredible"
"Definitely" he replied, chuckling softly "I'm beginning to enjoy this trip even more"
