The Akatsuki Stories II:
Akatsuki Reborn
Disclaimer: This chapter is dedicated to Halloween. And if this chapter gets 100 hits by November, I will give everybody a bag full of candy!
Dedication Chapter
The Pain (in the butt) Who Stole Halloween
There once was a village named Konoha. This village was ruled by the fifth Hokage, a sucker for gambling and a very old lady...
" HEY!"
Konoha was a peaceful place and was peaceful all year round. Except for Mondays. Everybody there hates Mondays. Anyway, there was also one other day that people hated most. It was Halloween. They used to LOVE Halloween though. They'd dress up and beg people for free poisoned candy. But this year, they rued it, like the creepy old man on the hill. Did I tell you about him?
His name was Pein Grinch, the most hated, paranoid, slimy, sneaky, ugly, evil- in other words, he's not nice.
How everybody despised him, causing havoc in the streets.
They also hated him when he took a long time buying his low-fat meats.
So on Halloween night, he said to his apprentice, " Today is a day of havUC."
That was the night that the Konoha village had just run out of luck.
Grinch had planned his scheme, literal and precise.
Tonight was the night Konoha, would soon pay the price.
The two drove off of the hill, preparing themselves for the night.
Because soon, before twilight, Halloween would no longer, be in sight...
" Pein, why do we have to ruin Halloween when we could just wait till Christmas?" asked Konan in the front seat, " I like Halloween."
" Well, TOO BAD FOR YOU!" yelled Pein at his apprentice, " Halloween is the night of bad memories, and the only way to get rid of bad memories, is to-"
" Put a lifetime supply of metal on our faces, because that worked SO WELL last time." interrupted Konan.
" Well, THIS TIME, " began Pein, " is GENIUS!"
" Whatever."
When they finally reached the decorated gate of Konoha, they were stopped by a guard.
" HALT!" he screamed.
" Whatever." Pein slapped a bomb on his back and by the time he was inside.
BANG!
" Now, let's set up."
Pein unzipped the giant bag and got out the most despised thing of all...
" Videos of the white Micheal Jackson doing Thriller!"
Konan shuddered at the thought about hundreds of people watching Jackson trick those poor, innocent, virgin children.
They put the tapes in the VCRs of everyone's VCR and glued the tape door and plug shut. Also, they did a jutsu that made it so the TV and VCR couldn't be broken. Then, they rigged it so it played every Halloween at 8:00 and didn't stop till 6:00 in the morning. Finally, THEY LOCKED EVERYBODY'S DOORS SHUT.
After doing this to every house and the giant screen on the Hokage tower, they settled down.
" Now," said Pein, " in 30 minutes, everybody will face the horror of Micheal Jackson!"
BUT, three kids overheard their plot.
" Micheal Jackson?" wondered one kid, who had blonde hair and whiskers.
" Sounds like the Grinch to me." said the other, who was an Uchiha.
" FROSTING!" yelled the third, who had absolutley no signifignance in the series whatsoever.
The three were 4 year olds Naruto Uzumaki, Sasuke Uchiha, and Whats-her-face.
" I can't believe everybody in the village will see Jackson after his 57th plastic surgery!" said Naruto, chibi tears flowing down his cheeks.
" I thought it was his 45th surgery." wondered Sasuke.
"50th!" yelled Whats-her-face.
" Sakura's right. It WAS his 50th!" realized Naruto.
" Now can we think about how we're going to stop everybody from becoming paralyzed by fear and insanity?" asked Sasuke who got out a map, " Here's what we do."
" Where'd you get the map?" asked Naruto.
" Starbucks."
After formulating a plan, the three got in position. Tonight, they were going to save the world from the horrors of... the Thriller.
To Be Continued...
