Disclaimer: Let me tell you the three things that I am not: I am not an Egyptian pharaoh, I am not male, and I am not Jo Rowling. I do not own Egypt, I do not own male anatomy, and I do not own Harry Potter.

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Chapter 5

Four days later…

Lily Potter hated her life. She hated her mother's questioningly raised eyebrows, she hated Albus' hesitant attempts at conversation that inevitable ended with the suggestion that maybe Lily should go and talk to Rose, and she hated James' ideas of remedying the situation by killing or dismembering Scorpius Malfoy. Oh, it was not because she cared about
Scorpius' wellbeing, it was just because she did not want her brother ending in Azkaban because of that.

Lily Potter hated Scorpius Malfoy, too, for making her look like a fool. All he had to do was say 'I like Rose" to stop her from following him all around and humiliating herself, but no, he had to keep his secret and let her live in her happy illusion that one day she could win him over from his imaginary girlfriend. Who was not so imaginary, after all. He must have enjoyed her crush on him – that must have done wonders for his self-esteem!

She hated her cousin, too. Rose was supposed to be her best friend and yet, she had stolen Scorpius from right under her nose! Best friends do not do that to one another and neither do cousins! Lily had thought that Rose cared about her as much as she herself had cared about Rose, but obviously that was not the case. Obviously, some stupid guy was more important for Rose than Lily.

What had Scorpius seen in Rose, anyway? She was not beautiful! Well, she was not ugly, of course, in fact, she was rather pretty, but Lily looked far better than her and that was not Lily's vanity talking, it was a fact: wherever the two cousins went, boys always stared after Lily, not Rose. Why the hell was Scorpius Malfoy different? He was the only one whose opinion mattered and he had chosen Rose instead of her? Rose, who could literally wear the same robes for three days, only Scourgifying them to keep them clean? Rose, who could not be bothered even to tame her bushy hair? Rose, who practically lived in the library? Rose, the bookworm, who thought that everything in the world could be solved by logic? If a guy told Rose that she'd broken her heart, she would go to the library and check whether there was a way to mend it! And Scorpius had chosen her?

Lily had not even realized that she was walking so angrily in London streets that people quickly stepped out of her way. She did not know where she was going to, but when someone familiar bumped into her, she was happy that she finally had found a victim to land her nasty mood onto.

Only, it seemed that Teddy Lupin had enough on his plate as it was, without Lily adding to it. His brown hair was sticking in all directions and his eyes were red – no, not as a result of morphing, just bloodshot, as if he had not slept in days – and looking wildly around. His face was pale and sunken. "Lily!" he exclaimed.

"Good God, Teddy, what happened?" she asked and while he was processing her question, as if his brain hurt, she looked around and for a first time she realized where she was: in front of the house where Teddy, Victoire, and their two children lived in. With something like shame, she realized that she had not even come to see the newborn baby, Julia – she had been preoccupied with the whole Scorpius/Rose affair.

He ran a hand through his hair. "I'm going to work," he announced with a maniacal grin, his face beaming.

"And that makes you so happy?" Lily asked suspiciously. Perhaps she should take him to St. Mungo's, instead? Maybe Teddy had gotten some mental disorder?

"Peace and rest, finally," the young Metamorphmagus explained. Unfortunately, Lily did not understand that, either. "Poor Vickie, I feel so bad for her, she has to stay with the little monster the whole day – maybe my Gran will come and stay with her a little – I can Floo her from work – "

Lily blinked, and then again. "Teddy," she said, "I am already here, so I can go in and stay with Victoire for a while."

Teddy's face lit up, he grabbed Lily and kissed her on the cheek. 'You are a lifesaver, Lily," he exclaimed. "Have I told you that I love you?"

Lily laughed nervously. "And yet, you married Victoire and not me," she said, clinging to him. She had always felt good with Teddy holding her, ever since she was born – he had looked so big then and she had felt so safe and protected.

The passers-by turned their heads to have a better view of them. Some of them started muttering and Lily clearly heard the word 'child-molester'. She blushed furiously, but fortunately, Teddy had not heard that.

"Well, I'd better come in," she said. "You know, I haven't seen the baby yet."

Teddy nodded and started walking away. Lily thought that she had heard something that sounded like "You can trust me, you don't want to," but she was not quite sure. She knocked at the front door and entered.

The incredible noise that greeted her made her want to turn back and leave. Instead, she followed the loud wailing to the living room, where she found both Victoire and the children. She felt her jaw dropping. Her ever so posh cousin was now wearing a blouse that was covered with vomit, her long white-blond hair was unwashed, and her eyes wore the same maniacal, desperate gleam that Lily had seen in Teddy's eyes only minutes earlier. The one month-old Julia was shouting at the top of her lungs in her mother's arms, despite all the rocking and whispering that Victoire was applying, and Alan was yelling that she was a bad girl and please, please, Mummy, please, send her back!

For a moment, Lily was tempted to turn round and leave, before someone could spot her, but then something stopped her. Alan's chin was trembling and there were tears in his eyes. Victoire looked like she would burst in tears any minute because of pure exhaustion. Sighing, Lily touched Alan's shoulder and when he looked at her, she put her best smile on. "Hello, Alan," she said. "Do you remember me? I am Lily."

The four year-old slowly nodded.

"I'll make you a nice breakfast, right, Vickie?" she asked her cousin.

"Oh, thank you, Lily," Victoire whispered gratefully.

An hour later, Alan was fed and finally taken to his friend Jake's house. Julia had stopped crying and had fallen asleep and Victoire even had the time to take a shower.

"She's a colicky baby," she explained to Lily, while she was drying her hair. "Last night, she didn't let us sleep even for a moment. Alan was quite pissed off – so were Teddy and I, if I have to be honest here. Do you want some coffee?"

"Yes, please."

The two cousins went to the kitchen and Victoire magicked a cup of tea for Lily. Victoire herself was a coffee drinker and Lily was surprised that she did not prepare a cup for herself. She told her that.

"I am a suckling mother," Victoire explained, looking hungrily at Lily's coffee. "I can't afford such things."

"Oh."

Then, Victoire took a bar of chocolate from the cabinet and looked at it longingly. "Victoire?" Lily asked hesitantly. "Vickie? What are you doing?"

"I'm imagining that I'm eating it," her cousin replied, "that makes me feel better."

Those poor kids, Lily thought, what would happen to them if both their parents go crazy?

They were silent for a while, Lily drinking her coffee and Victoire drinking her tea and eating her imaginary chocolate.

"Vickie?" Lily finally asked. "Is that the way you imagined your life, when you married Teddy?"

Victoire laughed. "Baby vomit, sleepless nights and total diet? Not quite!"

"Are you sorry?"

Victoire looked at her, amused. "Sometimes. It's inevitable. Like this morning."

"But are you happy?"

"Very happy."

Lily had almost expected a lecture of how she would understand one day, when she is older, but she had picked the wrong person: that was something that her Mum or her Grandma would say, or even her Aunt Hermione. One of the reasons for Victoire being Lily's favorite between her older cousins was that Vickie never treated her like a baby.

"Vickie?"

"Yes?" Victoire tensed, checking the Supersensory Charm, but fortunately, it was only her nerves, playing tricks on her: there was no noise in Julia's room.

"Why did you start playing Quidditch?"

Lily loved asking unexpected questions: she knew that she would have a better chance at getting an answer if the other person is unprepared, and up until now, no one had ever succeeded in leading Victoire to confess the reason for her sudden attraction to Quidditch.

'Because it was the only way of having Teddy separated from his girlfriend of the time. She would not leave him alone for a minute except for Quidditch practices!" Victoire recollected, and then decided that today, she deserved a piece of real chocolate, so she tore the wrapper and attacked the dark mass. She was kind enough to offer Lily a piece, too. "It was point number three in Get Teddy plan. And then I continued playing, because I found out that I loved doing it."

Lily giggled. "Get Teddy plan?" she repeated. "Isn't that a bit – I don't know, a bit too neatly organized? I mean – points and numbers!"

Victoire had closed her eyes and was savoring the chocolate taste on her tongue. "All is fair in love and war," she said.

Lily was silent. Her cousin's words suddenly reminded her about her own love problems. Should she try and make a Get Scorpius plan? It had obviously worked for Victoire, so why not for her, too?

Victoire opened her eyes and looked at Lily. "I know how it feels to be a little schoolgirl who has a hopeless crush on an older boy – cool and popular," she said quietly. "I know how euphoric you feel when he does as much as look at you and then how the world ends, when he walks in another direction without even realizing that you were looking at him. I don't doubt what lies in your heart, Lily."

"I love him." There was a challenge in Lily's voice, because she already knew what Victoire was trying to tell her. "And she knew that."

"It's hard to have feelings for someone who doesn't feel the same for you."

"He might have felt the same, but she fell on his neck."

'Lily, dear!"

"Well, Teddy finally fell for you, you said it yourself! And the two of you got married. You have two kids. It worked for you, so why not for me too?"

"Teddy did not have someone else to love, Lily, and that makes the whole difference."

Lily laughed scornfully. "You took him from another girl, everyone knows that!"

"From other girls," Victoire corrected her. "He dated half of the female population at Hogwarts and that's a fact. But they were just for snogging, nothing else, and I knew that. I am the only one that he has really fancied."

Lily opened her mouth to protest, but then closed it. Victoire took Lily's hand in her own.

"Scorpius likes Rose," she said gently. "He has fancied her for a long time. And she likes him back. They are not irresponsible and they don't want to hurt anyone. You know that, don't you?"

"But they were not responsible towards me."

"They are still in the euphoric stage of their relationship, when they can't think straight. And yet, I doubt that Rose really wanted to hurt you. I don't know Scorpius that well, but I'd say that he isn't the type to deliberately play with other people's feelings, too."

Her blue eyes were full of sympathy and that made Lily feel like a bigger fool than even the realization that Rose had dated Scorpius behind her back had made her feel.

"You've talked to her."

Victoire did not deny it. "Yes. And I think you should talk to her too. And when I say talking, I mean talking – not fighting."

Lily's face turned red like her hair. "She started it!" she said, realizing how childish she had sounded, but she did not care. "She did!"

"So I've heard. But she was out of herself, wasn't she? You drove her mad." Lily sullenly refused to answer. "You should talk to her. You both need to talk. Promise me?"

"I'll think about it," Lily said, "I'm not promising anything."

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The same evening…

"Hi, Oldie," Scorpius said. He had long ago forgotten the name of the oldest house-elf in Malfoy Manor – if he had ever known it, of course. Oldie had looked ancient even when Scorpius was a toddler, so he had named him Oldie and the other family members had followed his example. He took off his coat and gloves and looked guiltily at the old elf, who was already opening his mouth, no doubt to scold him. "I know that they are dirty, but I had a sort of accident and – "

"Master Scorpius," the house-elf interrupted him in low whisper, frantically looking around to make sure that no one could hear them. "Master Scorpius, you must go upstairs as quickly as possible, making no noise."

"Why?" Scorpius asked. "What happened? I know I'm late for the family's dinner, but – "

"FINALLY!"

Scorpius looked at the door of the dining room. "Nice to see you too, Grandfather," he said pleasantly.

Lucius, however, was not being pleasant at all. "I was at Diagon Alley today and I saw you."

"You did?"

"Were you kissing with the Weasley girl in Fortescue's?"

"Yes."

"So you were snogging, as the Muggles put it?"

"Yes."

"I don't want to see you doing that ever again!"

"Then don't peek!" Scorpius snapped and went upstairs, to his father's old room.

Lucius went back to the dining room and started ranting about his grandson having no pride, putting the family name to shame and that maybe the blood-traitor had given him some Love Potion or something. Astoria barely kept her anger, but not for long. When she started making sarcastic remarks, Draco sighed and thought angrily, If he hadn't been caught kissing her, I could have enjoyed a calm family dinner. Where the hell is Weasley, when you need him?

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