Chapter Five
Muddled Thinking
When the clock chimes six times she wakes, how long she was asleep on the couch, she's not sure.
Checking her look in the bathroom mirror, red, tired eyes, she opens the medicine cabinet and finds a bottle of Visine. "Damn I hate doing this to my eyes but I can't let him know I've been crying."
She manages after three tries to get one drop into one eye, but half of it has runs down her cheek. She watches the liquid rolling down and starts to laugh, "Gees you are such a spaz sometimes." She tires again with the same eye, same results but the redness has faded.
After a long soothing shower she slips into her robe and emerges from the bathroom as the alarm clock is buzzing, surprised that he has not moved, she turns off the alarm.
Sitting next to him, she rubs his shoulder, "Bobby are you awake?" He just grunts. "I'll take that as a yes." She remains on the edge of the bed for a moment. He has yet to move, "Well, the shower is free." He grunts once more, Robby's babble is heard from the monitor. "Robby's up," she pats his shoulder, "Come on." She stands. "Get up," she says with a lilt in her voice.
He waves his hand at her, "Ok, ok."
After she tends to Robby, she places him back in the crib, returning to the bedroom to change. Stepping through the threshold, she stops dead in her tracks, he is still in bed. She stands over him, "Bobby, come on," she implores. "Get up." He turns over on his side away from her. She touches his forehead, He's still warm, she chuckles softly.
Slipping on her panties and bra, she takes a quick peek at him. He usually watches and flirtatiously glares at her when she gets dressed. She plays being shy, which only makes him more enthusiastic and hot. It's a silly game but its fun and more times than not it ends up with them making love, but not this morning or the previous mornings. His back is to her, she finishes changing then sits on the edge of the bed, shaking him, "Bobby are you going to get up and go to work or this the position you intend to endure for the rest of the day," she says lightheartedly.
Once again, a grunt, she lightly slaps him on the back, "Can you please answer me and not just grunt at me."
"Alright," he suddenly pulls down the covers, "I'm up, Jesus Christ!" He brushes past her, mumbling a few obscenities. "Thank God I'm not your partner today," she bites her lip suddenly remembering the events of yesterday. His response, he slams the bathroom door. "I'm sorry," she exclaims.
"Mommy!"
"Ok Robby I'm coming."
She, with Robby in tow makes their way downstairs. She sets him down at the bottom of the steps, he goes off in the direction of the living room, she the kitchen. She begins to prepare breakfast for her son and making coffee. They couldn't wait for him to start walking; she can see him in the living room trying his best to get a toy out of the playpen, which is used more for harboring his toys than a safe place for him to play. "Robby……….no, no, don't pull." She bends downs, pointing, "Which one?"
"Ernie."
She picks up the stuffed doll, and rubs her hand through his hair; "I think Ernie is going to need a bath soon." She hands it to him and he smiles and hugs the doll; within seconds, he is heading for the stairs. She smiles at his idea, taking a few steps she takes a light hold of his arm, "Robby, let's have breakfast, then we have to get ready to go to Miss Wendi's." She bends down and picks him up, "Oh boy, I don't now how much longer I'm going to be able to pick you up." She kisses his cheek, he returns the kiss.
She carries him into the kitchen and sets him down in the baby seat, which has a permanent spot at the kitchen table. The coffee is done; she pours herself a cup then begins to spoon-feed him a bowl of oatmeal.
He finishes his breakfast and she pours herself another cup of coffee. "Mommy…"
"Yes Robby." He holds up his bowl. "Sure honey," she places the dirty bowl in the sink and sets down a clean one, fills it with cheerios minus the milk. He picks up handfuls of the cereal; most of them end up on the table and floor, not his mouth. She has learned to wait until he is done before she begins to clean up the mess.
Scanning through the newspaper, Alex leaves it open to an ad for JC Penney's. The ad is for a sale on men's suits, for this weekend. Two men appear in the ad, Robby pats the page, "Daddy."
She chuckles at his keen recognition, then frowns, "What the hel…. heck is he doing," she calls to him, "Bobby!" She listens for an answer, she calls again, "Bobby."
Alex fills a sippy cup with juice and takes Robby by the hand, "Come on Honey let's go see what Daddy is doing." They walk side by side up the stairs. She finds him in bed, she sits next to him then lightly taps his shoulder, "Bobby, are you alright?"
"What?" he says surprisingly, "Yeah, um no. I feel terrible."
Robby crawls on the bed, "Daddy."
He manages a slight smile and rubs his head, "Hey, little guy."
"Are you going to take the day off or just the morning?"
"I….probably the day."
"You know, I think that is a very good idea, before I leave do you need anything? He shakes his head, "Do you want anything to eat?"
"No, I'm not hungry." He lays back down pulling the covers up to his neck.
She stands, "Since I have Robby dressed and ready to go to Wendi's I'll take him, that way you can really get some much needed rest. Do you think that later this afternoon you could pick him up?"
"I suppose."
"Bobby if you don't think you can, tell me." She bends down placing her hands on the bed, "Should I call the doctor?"
"I don't need a doctor I just want to be left alone," he says with his face in the pillow.
"What did you say?"
He lifts his head up, "No, no doctor." He turns to face the ceiling, "I'll get Robby."
She straightens up, "Ok, call me if you need anything or if you are not well enough to drive to Wendi's and I will pick him up." She lays a kiss on his forehead.
One Police Plaza
"Time for a break," Alex stands and stretches, "I need a cup of coffee Mark."
"I'll get it for you."
"No, not that coffee," pointing toward the break room. "A good cup of coffee, can I bring you back something?"
"No thanks Alex, I'm good."
No line in the coffee shop, she decides to take a short walk on this warm spring day. Removing her cell phone, she hits speed dial, after three rings he picks up. "Hello."
"I hope I didn't wake you but…."
"No I'm up, I'm in the kitchen, fixing something to eat."
"How are you feeling?"
"Ah, alright I guess."
"Maybe you should see a doctor, Bobby."
"How about this, if I feel this crappy tomorrow I'll call alright."
"Ok, I'll go along with that."
"My phone is beeping, it's probably my Mom, she's only called twice today, made the mistake of answering this morning and told her I was home." She hears him laugh and joins in the laughter.
"Ok I'll call you later, love you."
"I love you too."
She returns to the squad and the paperwork, "You know," she says as she sits down. "I'm going to need glasses if I continue to read all this, some of the handwriting is horrible."
Mark leans over, "Logan, it's got to be Logan, my God the man's handwriting is almost illegible."
"I heard that." Mike stops at Marks desk and picks up a sheet of paper, glancing at it quickly. "I have to agree with you, it is pretty bad." He lays it down. "I heard Goren called in sick, anything serious?" Alex rolls her chair back, frowning at her colleague. "Alex I didn't mean…."
"No, Mike it's alright I understand."
"Logan," Ross calls to him, "My office."
"Catch you later."
"See ya Mike." She and her new partner return to their pile of papers.
Later that Afternoon
2 PM
She hits the speed dial and after five rings, he picks ups, "Yeah," he says harshly.
"Hey it's me, did I wake you." Silence, "Bobby are you alright?"
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," he pauses. "No not really I feel a little dizzy, I need to lie down."
"Why did you answer the phone?"
"Huh?"
"Nothing. It's not important, should I plan on picking up Robby?"
"What? Robby, no I said I'll do and I will," he says crossly.
"Ok you don't have to bite my head off."
"Sorry."
"It's alright, get some rest."
"I will."
"I'm going to hang up now you….go take a nap; I'll be home by seven."
"Seven?"
"Yes, Mark and I," he interrupts.
"Mark? Who's Mark?"
"Very funny Bobby, anyway."
"Oh yeah Mark."
"We...we are hoping to finish up these reports, tonight."
"Yeah alright, see you later." The phone disconnects.
Mark can't help but notice the frown on her face, he inquires, "Anything wrong Alex?"
Placing the phone in her bag, "He sounds funny; a little confused, I guess he really does need to get some sleep."
One Police Plaza
6:30 PM
Mark has finished his pile and he offers to help her, "Alex give me a few more files."
"No, Mark you've done enough, I'm sorry but my mind seems to be elsewhere lately."
"Well I can certainly understand. I remember reading about her…"
She holds up her hand, "Please Mark, I know being a cop does tend to make us curious but if we could possibly talk about someone or something else I would surely appreciate it."
"Of course, I apologize."
"No need to apologize."
"Any news as to when Ross is going to let you two take on a case?" A voice is heard from behind.
Alex looks up from her never-ending pile, "No not yet Tom."
"Where's you part….Bobby today?"
"He's home sick he wasn't feeling well this morning."
"Damn I hope it's not the flu."
"No maybe it's the stress of not knowing where…." She pauses, focusing her eyes on the paper in her hand. "I just think he needed a day off."
"Hope he feels better."
"Thank you Tom." He waves at Mark as he walks away from them.
"Alex," Mark wheels his chair closer to her. "Is he a good friend of yours?"
She watches him as he disappears around the corner. "No I've been here for seven years he's been on the squad for five. And that is about how many words we have spoken in that time."
"He seems awfully interested in you and Bobby."
"Yes he does, doesn't he?"
Her cell phone rings, "Eames."
"Alex its Wendi," Alex's heart races a bit.
"Yes Wendi, is something wrong?"
"Alex you know I don't mind when any of you are late because I know the hours but it is six-forty five."
"Six forty five! I'm sorry Wendi; Bobby was supposed to pick up Robby tonight. I'm leaving now."
"Alex, please drive safely."
"I will, I'm sorry."
"It's alright; you don't have to keep apologizing."
As she jogs through the squad toward the elevator, she calls home. The answering machine, she then calls his cell it rings six times, voice mail. She closes the phone and stuffs it into her bag. "Shit."
As she drives out of the garage she notices Tom in his car, he waves as she passes. "What the hell is it with that guy?"
After a few more apologies to Wendi, she and Robby are in the car headed for home.
The Goren Home
Alex follows Robby through the house into the kitchen, she calls to him. "Robby come here and let me take off your jacket."
He runs out of the kitchen and into the living room, pulling a DVD from his shelf, "Mommy." She peeks through the doorway, "Alright," Alex wipes her hands and pops the DVD into the machine. She hands him a bottle as he lies on the floor with his back up against the couch.
She ascends the stairs opening the bedroom door, unmade bed and clothes on the floor, she frowns, picking them up. That's odd. The bathroom door is closed she lightly knocks, "Bobby." No answer, she opens the door. No Bobby.
The Cape Cod house is not large and she finds him in the little den-office off the kitchen, a room that is rarely used. He is staring out the window. "Bobby," she says softly. He releases his hold of the curtain. She asks, "Bobby what are you doing?"
"Did you see her?" he pulls the curtain aside again.
"Her? Who are you talking about?"
He turns suddenly, "You know damn well who."
She leaves the door open and walks further into the room, "Bobby," she takes his hand. "Please sit down." He turns to face her, she caresses his cheek. "You look pale."
He gazes into her eyes, "She was out there."
"Yes, yes she was." Alex makes a motion to look toward the window. "She's gone now."
A whiff of alcohol emanates from his breath. Leading him to the chair behind the desk, she notices a beer can and a prescription bottle on top of the desk. Releasing his hand as he sits, she picks up the bottle and reads the label, percocet, it's empty. "Bobby what have you done?" she asks nervously. He stands up quickly and takes a step toward her; suddenly he falls to the floor. Robby comes running into the room, "Mommy!" Alex takes a hold of her son with one hand and pulls out her cell phone with the other.
"911 what is your emergency."
TBC
