A/N: Yes. Finally. A fic. I've been dry of ideas since March, seriously. Today I had to write and yes, it's inspired by the Amy Winehouse song, and yes, I really would rather not associate myself with Amy Winehouse (her last name says it all, really. And if you watch TMZ…they scared me out of liking her), but I thought this was a perfect song for our lovely rehab feline. And erm no, I would never support drugs if my life depended on it. So don't think it's some weird subliminal message fic like Disney movies and Beatles songs!! Enjoy and R&R! :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Amy. Nor do I own Mimi. I'd send them both to rehab and make them stay there if I did…
They try to make me go to rehab
But I say no no no
Rehab never worked for me. I was never sure why it didn't….but it could never do the trick.
Sure, you hear the stories of the druggies who've "come clean" after entering rehab.
Makes one think if it actually really did anything for them in the first place, or if rehab is just some big scary place where they MAKE you get over your addiction.
Your life.
Drugs were my life. It was something I needed. I didn't want to control it. I never did. Yes, I was very much aware of April and her condition….and HOW that condition started, but, you see, I didn't care. I had the condition. I was living with it. I was fine with it.
That's where 'no day but today' played in.
I loved my life, I loved my drugs, I loved being free. I loved being a dancer, even though, most of the time it wasn't the BEST job in the world, but the stage was where I could prove myself again and again without any worries of anything at all.
I think what I loved most of all was love. I didn't need a rehab. I had everything I needed right in front of me. Drugs were just there to help me along the way. Help me deal with the pain and the anger. And I knew how much I let Roger down, but it was my life.
My own decision.
The man said 'Why do you think you here'
I said 'I got no idea'
'I'm gonna, I'm gonna lose my baby
So I always keep a bottle near'
He said 'I just think your depressed
Kiss me here baby and go rest'
Born to be bad, as I used to always say. Even as a teenager I used to like to be on the rebellious side. It was my nature.
It was why I left home at fifteen.
Rehab was just a monster trying to take away my freedom. Trying to take away my expression and my identity and my life and all the things that mattered to me.
But I am who I am. And if anybody wanted to change that, they can know that it's still my life. Still my glory.
So now I sit, on a cold park bench, waiting for somebody to find me. Or maybe someone to not notice me. I want to see Roger. But I don't want to let him down.
Again.
I'm shaking and I know it. I glance over to see a guy with a needle and a tube tied around his arm.
He's dead.
And this really doesn't scare me.
It's not just my pride
It's just til these tears have dried
They tried to make me go to rehab, but I said 'no no no'
Yes I've been black, but when I come back you'll know know know
I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine
They tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go go go
Shut up I know it's kinda pointless! I wrote it from the heart...that's all that matters! Please review :)
