Note: this poem is in-tune/based off the song 'Ignorance is Bliss' by the Jellyfish.


Evilness is Bliss

Wake up!

My pretties, it is I, your one and only boss: Ozzy Cobblepot.

I also go by Penguin, can't you see?

I wear black, and I'm pretty mean,

but at least my name is better than Sir Mix-A-Lot!

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Oh Batman...are you yet frightened?...

If you knew just why you're here, your anger will be heightened...

So let's just say: Evilness is bliss!

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Oh, while I have to go with this plan,

I want you to go and catch that one man, you know the Batman?

Oh, what's his other name?

Ah yes -- the Dark Knight, just the sound makes me want to go and fight,

because I would love to take this umbrella, and play my own game...

-----

Oh Batman...we hate your sidekicks...

We've never been fond of them, but then again, they'll make good bait--

Oh, I can't wait!

Because... EVILNESS IS BLISS!

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With my umbrella, I'll go and fly,

to steal jewels, and hear the people cry,

until I become wealthier than that Mr. Wayne.

The only problem with my crimes,

is that I don't ever have enough time,

so there goes my money; it's so not funny, and that Bruce is such a pain!

-----

Oh Batman...you think you're so clever...

All your words are alphabet soup, a picture tells it better...

I'll say it once more: Evilness is Bliss.

Batman, haven't you heard? A picture's worth a thousand words.

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You call yourself a hero, but to us villains, you're a zero.

I can't believe you come whenever someone's in distress.

You remind me of a police guy that tried to stop me before,

he fought so hard, that he got sore

--I mean sore -- yes, so sore! All over his body -- he's a mess!

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O, I would love to take my hands...

Just one time around Batman's neck...

It'll surely be the last time he mess with me!

-----

Oh Batman...are you yet frightened?... (we so hate your sidekicks)

If you knew just why you're here, your anger will be heightened...

Oh Batman...you think you're so clever... (and you were never)

All your words are alphabet soup, a picture tells it better...

-----

Oh, for the last time, Batman...

Um...

Then again, I think I've made my point...