It's finally up! Chapter two of "slowly dying" Sorry it took so long. I could sit here and list a bunch of excuses but I'm sure you want to read the story.

Special thanks to LoveyDoveyStar. She helped me with some of the parts. I love yah leelee.

Just in case, If this gets offensive to anyone i suggest you stop reading.

I showed a part to my friend and he said that it might be offensive so I didnt want that to happen.

I dont own.


Chapter 2: Hungry

It was always so hard to say no to food but when I tried other diets they didn't really work. I convinced myself that tomorrow I would train harder then everyone else so I could lose some extra weight, and when I got home I would exercise more. I really didn't care what I had to do to become skinny. Even if it killed me, I'd rather die skinny then be alive and fat. I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror anymore. All I saw was this monster looking back at me. It made me feel like such a failure. I worked so hard to make my hair soft and long to impress Sasuke, but not once did I think about how fat I looked. Now that I thought about it there was all this extra skin hanging out when I sit. It's not fair that Ino is so perfect. She isn't shy like me and her forehead is perfectly normal. And to make it worse on me, she's a lot skinnier. I hate it when I look over at everyone and they look so thin and I look so fat. Even Sasuke looks skinnier then me!

When we met up with Kakashi-sensei the next day I felt like I couldn't do anything. I was so hungry and weak, but I could tell that I was getting skinnier. Even if it was just a little, I felt lighter. When Sensei gave me and Sasuke a bento box, I couldn't decide whether I should eat it or not. If I ate a little I wouldn't be hungry, but I wouldn't get any skinnier. And if I didn't eat I would be skinny, but I wouldn't be hungry. Not to mention everyone would think that I had some eating disorder. I decided that I could eat a little, just so I wouldn't be too hungry. Bite by bite. Little by little. I could taste the goodness of food. It made me want more. I thought food was supposed to make you full not hungry. My stomach was longing for something to go into it. When Sasuke gave his bento to Naruto I decided to give mine to him instead. It would be a lot easier if someone else ate the food and I didn't have to refuse to eat it. Kakashi-Sensei nearly gave me a heart attack when he came out. When he said that we passed the test I felt even happier. Two things out of one: I was skinnier, and I was finally a ninja.

The next day we were supposed to have our first mission, but Kakashi-sensei just HAD to train us. He told us to be at the bridge at 5 but then he came at 9. If I knew he was going to be late again I wouldn't have worried so much about being late. I came running to the bridge only to find Naruto rambling about how Sensei was late and that I could've been sleeping. But the thing that made it worse was I didn't eat anything since lunch the day before. Throughout the training I was so hungry and Kakashi-sensei worked us past our limits. We took a break at lunchtime and I sat there and watched everyone eat while I drank a little bit of water. And when Naruto would talk and eat at the same time and chunks of chewed food came flying out of his mouth so I would punch him for that every now and then. When I just sat leaning against the tree I could see Kakashi-sensei giving me a few suspicious looks. I tried not to show that I was getting a little nervous. I felt myself tense up and begin sweating.

Naruto began making a commotion. "Sakura-chan! Why aren't you eating? Sakura-Chan? Hello? Sakura-Chan!"

My body jolted when I finally realized that Naruto was talking to me. "Huh what? Oh what do you want Naruto?"

"I was just wondering… why aren't you eating anything?"

"Oh. I-I just had a big breakfast that's all. Don't worry about me I can eat later." I gave Naruto a small smile, but it was enough for him and he went back to his own business.

Sensei cleared his throat. "Alright let's begin training again."

"What!?! We've been training all morning! Can't we go on a mission now?"

"First comes first Naruto. I already told you, you're not ready for a mission yet. Now then Sakura, you'll be sparring with Sasuke and Naruto you will be with me. When one person from each match gives up we will switch."

I began feeling dizzy and I wanted to throw up. But the only problem was there was nothing for me to throw up. I tried to keep balance as I went toward Sasuke, but then he came at me and suddenly everything went black. When I woke up I saw Kakashi-sensei watching over me and then I heard sounds of kunai and shuriken clashing.

"Sakura, when was the last time you ate?"

"Wh-what?" I woke up hearing Kakashi's voice.

"When was the last time you ate?"

"I-I said that I had a big breakfast…"

"Don't lie to me Sakura. Now tell me when you ate last."

"It was at the bell exercise yesterday… But I really wasn't hungry."

"You need to eat something Sakura it's unhealthy to be starving yourself. I won't do anything about it today but if you keep this up I will force you to eat. Understood?"

"But I'm really not hungry. I just need water."

"Answer me Sakura."

"O-okay… but I just-"

Naruto jumped over to me."Hey Sakura-chan! Are you okay? You barely started fighting Sasuke and you fainted!"

"I'm fine Naruto don't worry about me. I just didn't get a lot of sleep last night. I'll be fine tomorrow."

I gave Naruto another reassuring smile and thought about what Kakashi was saying.

It was unhealthy, but it would make me skinnier. And if I ate it would be healthy if I didn't eat to excess but then I wouldn't get skinnier. But then if I don't eat Kakashi will force me to. So either way I'm going to have to eat. But I won't have to eat unless Kakashi knows I'm not. So if I pretend to eat… but I'm really not then it should be ok. But then how do I eat without really eating? I can throw it all up after I eat… Or I can just bring an empty bento box and pretend to eat by the river where no one can see me. I really don't want to throw up everything I eat, but if it comes to it I will. For now, I'll just pretend I'm eating.

"Okay, that's enough for today. Later tonight meet at the bridge and we'll go on our first mission." Kakashi disappeared and everyone began going in a different direction.

"Sakura-Chan, do you want to… you know, go out and eat with me?" Naruto kicked the rocks under him and looked down while talking.

"Oh, sorry Naruto I was going to stay here and train a little. I need to get caught up because I missed more then half today. Sasuke-kun do you want to train with me?"

"…hn… I don't have time for you little games. What makes you think that I would train with you? All you would do is hold me back. You should work on beating Naruto before you think about training with me. Knowing you, Naruto would be a challenge. And if you have enough time to think about starving yourself to get skinnier you should spend more time training."

Sasuke walked away to his own training spot and left me alone. I didn't know what to be surprised by: the fact that Sasuke just said the longest sentence to me ever, or that he just rejected me in the meanest way possible. But then again, this is Sasuke we're talking about.

I stayed outside and trained for a while until the sun started to set. I figured that I should go home and wash my face a little before I went out to the bridge. After I finished preparing and getting all my weapons ready I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked the same as I did the day before. Nothing was happening. I felt like such a failure. It was all because those few bites of rice I ate on my first day training as team seven. I stepped onto the scale before leaving. When I looked at the number, I couldn't help but be surprised. I stayed in the same position for a while staring at the number. In a few seconds I broke free from my trance and left the house thinking about my new weight. 90 pounds. I felt satisfied but looked back at my slightly flabby thighs.

I can do better.


Next chapter will be longer. And it will be uploaded sooner because... SCHOOL IS OUT!

I usually do a little part of the story each day so in about a week or so it should be up again. I need to update "don't be shy" so it might come around next week.

Thanks for reading :

-Sakira