Chapter Four
Sirius' eyes snapped open and he gasped.
"Harry!"
1974
"Harry, huh?"
"Yea, why?"
"I just never pictured James having a kid, and if he ever did I didn't' think he'd name it Harry."
"Hey what's wrong with Harry!" Came the indignant cry of the teen currently occupying the floor space in front of the fireplace.
"Just a bit plane is all. Harry. Harry. Har-Ry. Odd," Sirius said half jokingly from his seat on the uncomfortable chair, his face still buried in his hands.
"So do you do this all the time?" Harry asked softly, Sirius almost missing the question.
"Do what?" The boy asked miserably.
"Make a joke of everything when your uncomfortable, because if it is I don't know how long I'll be able to tolerate you," Sirius flinched but nodded his head. He did always turn things into jokes when he was unsure of himself, it was a natural defense.
There was a tense silence left behind, neither knowing how to broach the subject at hand. Neither really wanting to. Harry pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them trying to bring some warmth to his cold body. The fire wasn't lit. Harry closed his eyes, but when a red-orange flash of color exploded behind them he opened his eyes only to feel warmth rush over his body. The fire was lit now.
Harry turned to Sirius, and nodded his head in thanks. He didn't trust himself to speak and he was feeling just a little awkward. Sirius only moved to put his wand back in his pocket, and lay his chin back on the palms of his hands, his dark and glossy black hair covering some of his face. Harry closed his eyes and tried not to think of how attractive his Godfather was, not a simple task when one considered the fact that the man was practically sex walking. Harry rubbed his temples and sighed, this was going to be tough.
"So how did you travel so far back in time?"
"I don't know, one minute I was sneaking around the house and found this room. I couldn't help myself when I got in, I had to look around and snoop, as I always do, and always get in trouble for mind you. Payback is a bitch. Anyways, I was looking through those drawers and found my family ring I put it on, and found a letter I read it, it was from my Dad to you, then I felt like I was being pulled by a portkey, I landed flat on my arse in the middle of the damn hallway, with Kreature leaning over me checking my bloody wounds. Really why the hell do you have a thing like him wandering around? He's fucking creepy!" Harry didn't really know when his language had become so foul but he supposed he was trying to impress Sirius. 'How dumb,' he thought to himself. But when he heard Sirius let out a bark-like laugh he felt the tingle of satisfaction creep up his spine. So all was not lost, eh?
"I don't know, Mummy Dearest fancies him, maybe? He's the only one willing to come within a mile of her bloody nasty knickers," as Sirius made a face disgusted with what he had said both boys began to laugh. But the laugher was short lived as Sirius started going into a coughing fit. Harry was about to stand and go over to him when Sirius held up and hand and his coughs subsided.
"What was that about?" Harry asked worriedly.
"I have been sick lately, I don't get to eat much here, and I don't feel so good," the older boy said not looking at Harry.
"Why not? Why don't you eat much?"
"After I came crawling back home on my hands and knees, my mother was still not pleased that I had run away in the first place. She decided I wouldn't eat unless I did something that pleased her, which wasn't very much," Harry was almost afraid to ask what kind of things pleased her. At Harry's horrified look, Sirius shook his head and chuckled dryly.
"Not anything like that, she thinks I'm disgusting. I meant like acting dark, insulting my friends, or Dumbledore, things like that. I'm sure you know more than your letting on right now. If I'm your Godfather we must talk all the time, you know a lot of this don't you?" Sirius prodded.
"Yeah, I do know a lot, but you never told me she starved you, or anything like that..." Harry finished awkwardly.
"Sorry, if I'm freaking you out, by telling you all this, I just don't have many people to talk to these days. But hey things must get a little better if I become your Godfather, right?" Sirius turned hope filled watery eyes on him and he froze. Only after Sirius turned away hurt did Harry snap out of his stupor.
"Sorry, Sirius it's not that, it's just I didn't expect this, no one ever told me you guys fought," Harry tried to explain.
"Why- why are you guys fighting?" Harry asked cautiously, not sure he wanted the answer.
"Isn't it obvious? After what I did to Remus, to Snape, they all hate me. Remus not as much as James. I could tell James was the only reason Remus hadn't tried to come up to me by the end of the year. He was so mad that I would sacrifice something so big for something so petty. I mean I wasn't even thinking about it that way. You know exposing Remus, getting him kicked out of Hogwarts, made a murdered. It was in the spur of the moment, you know me I don't think strait when I'm upset," Sirius had dropped his face back into his hands.
"You know they ignored me for the longest time, wouldn't even look at me. I pulled that stunt in January, they went all that time ignoring me, James didn't even flinch when he saw me crying once. Funny thing is I don't cry, I have never cried, he knew that, and didn't care. But after so long of being alone I couldn't stand it I hurt so much, I cried. They all hate me, I hate me, I don't deserve them," Harry stood up and walked over to the slightly sobbing form of his Godfather. He put a hand on his shoulder, Sirius flinched, but didn't push Harry away.
"My mother," said Sirius flatly.
"What?" Harry asked perplexed.
"She was proud, when we had gotten home and Regulus told her about what I did, she said she was proud of me. It's funny all my childhood when I still loved her, all I wanted to do was make her proud of me, and when I started hating her I finally did it, and I felt nothing but hate towards her and disgust towards myself. Ironic, huh?"
"Yeah a little I guess," Harry moved to the seat beside Sirius and the two sat in silence, listening to the crackling of the fire. Harry turned a looked into the dull gray eyes of the man next to him, the fire that was reflected in them made Harry wish he could stare at Sirius forever, be like this forever. But then he felt a pang of guilt and sadness, his Sirius, his real Sirius was alone in their time probably panicking not being able to find him.
The silence between them stretched once again making the both of them slightly uncomfortable. Sirius because he couldn't believe he told all those things to a stranger, and Harry because he was with someone he loved but someone that was truly a stranger. Someone he didn't know how to deal with, he had never met the slightly suicidal version of Sirius, and it scared him.
"What did Malfoy say to you?" Sirius' head snapped up and he looked at Harry with wide scared eyes.
"W-what?" Harry's eyes narrowed in suspicion.
"Sirius, in the hall before what did he say to you that got you scared?" Sirius bit his bottom lip and shook his head. He couldn't tell Harry that, Harry would hate him.
"I won't hate you, you know? You can tell me anything Sirius. Because from now on, for as long as I am here you are my best friend, my only friend, you can trust me," Sirius stared in shock at the young man across from him. How did he do that? How did he know exactly what he was thinking? But that wasn't what had really shocked him. Harry had called him his friend, his best friend. Why would he say something like that? And if it was true then he really couldn't say what Malfoy had said to him, he wasn't going to lose his... only friend.
"No, he said nothing. But how did you know what I was thinking?" Sirius asked trying to change to subject.
"No, your not going to get away with that Sirius, I know you to well to let you. You will not change topics on me, I can see right trough you," those words seemed to answer both his questions, or really question and answer.
"What did he say to you?" The look in Harry's eyes made him want to answer, made him feel he had to answer. The piercing gaze, those two beautiful emerald green eyes, they made him want to spill his guts.
"He said I was his, and that no matter how many people came to my rescue he would always be there to get me back, that I would always come back."
"And I will always be here to rescue you."
HSHS
A/N: I know there is not so much action in this one, but I needed to establish a trust between the two before I threw them to the wolves. And yes there is now a love triangle. Lucius/Sirius/Harry. Yummy I know. I'll try to update soon!
I hope you decide to review!
-Bloody
