Summary: - UNIT finally make there appearance, but will the Mathew Davies situation go the way Jack had planed?

A/N: - wow this one took ages to get up, I have been so busy! And the next will probably take longer because I'm going on holidays. But I hope you like the next instalment of this, I'm actually rather happy with this chapter. I'm sorry for any errors, its 11:30 and I just want to go to bed. ENJOY!


UNIT

The next morning started normally enough, Ianto woke up to the sun in his eyes and one Jack Harkness wrapped around his torso. It took all of his self control to not flip the older man and have his dirty way with him then and there. The only thing keeping him from doing this was that Jack had neglected to turn the alarm clock on the night before, meaning that instead of waking up at 5 30, he didn't get up until 8. He spent the next half an hour repeating the word 'shit' over and over out loud, having the world's quickest shower, not having any coffee and unceremoniously pushing Jack and Mathew out of the door.

Ianto was half way to the Hub before Jack felt brave enough to talk. Even then he stuttered out his sentence, he really was surprised Ianto didn't shoot him when he woke up. "Um… Ianto?"

"What?" Ianto said a bit sharper than he normally would.

"I'm… um… not wearing pants."

"Well if you had have set the alarm you would be, don't complain to me about it. Anyway, it wouldn't be the first time you walked around Cardiff in only your underpants."

"You could have waited till I had pants on Yan."

"If I had have waited for you to finish Jack we would have been late. Now we will be just on time."

"Yes but Ianto I am the boss, I am aloud to be late, I could give myself the morning off if I wanted too."

"Yes but Jack what would you do if UNIT decided that they wanted to turn up early just to throw us off, and you greet them late and in your underwear?"

"Well Ianto if we had have waited I would just be addressing them late as I would at least be wearing pants."

"Oh Jack don't try and deny the fact that you would love for the General to see you in your underwear. You would love to get the goods out for the grumpy General."

"Ianto that is completely and utterly beside the point!"

"Oh is it just?"

"Yes. I would prefer him to beg for it then I would take a lot of pride in walking away from him."

"Oh please! All he would have to say is 'please Captain' and you would have him on naked on your desk in a matter of minutes."

"Maybe that would be true at one stage, but not any more I have honour Ianto."

"You have honour? Why is that?

"Because I belong to a very sexy Welshman."

Ianto fought hard to hide a blush. "That doesn't mean you wouldn't shag anyone who asks my dear Captain."

"You insult me sir."

Before Ianto could reply, Mathew (who they hadn't realised was in silent giggles) burst out laughing.

"Um… Mathew, what's so funny?" Ianto said, exchanging a confused look with Jack

"You two."

"Why are we funny?" said Jack.

"You're like an old married couple. I'm just trying to figure out who the wife is."

"That would be Jack." Ianto said with a wide grin.

"I am not the wife Ianto."

"Yes Jack you are."

"And here we go again." Mathew mumbled under his breath.

Once they arrived at the Hub Ianto made coffees and Jack acquired pants, they waited for Gwen to arrive before they went to discuss the plan for the day in the conference room.

"OK so using my all of my superior intelligence I have created what I believe the world's best plan." Jack said from his seat at the end of the table.

"And what would that be?" said Gwen.

"Well Gwen I am about to explain, I think we should change our ordinary positions."

"I'm always up for a new position." Mathew chocked on his coffee when he realised the subtext in what Ianto had said.

"I know you do, speaking of which I was thinking that tonight…"

"JACK!" said Gwen. "Focus."

"Right, well, we have dealt with UNIT enough times for them to know the basics on how we run this place. What if we were to change it only slightly?"

"It would take them aback just that little bit, but it might be enough to give us a foot hold and the slight upper hand." Said Ianto.

"So how are you planning on changing the basics around here?" said Gwen.

"Quite simply, Gwen you swap jobs with Ianto, just for the day, you can greet them at the Tourist Information Office and Ianto can sit in on the meeting." Jack said, sitting back in his chair, looking quite pleased with himself.

"So what, Gwen will clean up after you and swallow all of your sexual harassment?" said Ianto.

"Actually Jack I wanted to talk to you about that." Said Gwen.

"What my sexual harassment? Because if so Gwen if you're feeling left out I can always accommodate you." Jack said with a smile. "But you really wouldn't look as good in a three piece pant suit."

"That's not what I meant Jack, I mean I was thinking, I'm pregnant so I really shouldn't be on the field. So what if Ianto and I swap jobs, at least until bubs comes."

"I think it's a brilliant idea, but its Ianto's choice in the end."

"That's fine but I'm sorry Gwen but you're not touching the coffee machine."

Ianto spent the rest of the morning showing Gwen how to take care of the Tourist Information Office and writing out a list of all the little jobs he does.

"Wait, what, you call the Queen? You talk to busy lizzy?" said Gwen in complete amazement.

"Yeah but I will handle her and the heavy duty archives. Jack got lost for three hours last time he was down there."

"We really do take you for granted Ianto." Gwen said with a genuine smile.

At 10-30 Ianto and Gwen made their way to the conference room where Mathew and Jack were waiting to prepare for the meeting that was to come. At 10-55 Mathew went and hid in Jacks office and Gwen went up to the TI office.

"You ready for this?" Jack said, putting a hand over Ianto's.

"Always." Ianto said bring up the CCTV of the TI office on the plasma screen.

At exactly 11 am the General and one of his cronies walked into the information centre.

"Good morning sir." Gwen said, cheerily.

"Miss Cooper?" said the General, obviously taken aback by Gwen's appearance. "Where is mister Jones?"

"He will be assisting the Captain today sir."

"Oh, well, very good then." the General obviously thought that this was going to be easy, he apparently didn't think Ianto was much of an opponent.

"Yes sir." Gwen said pushing the blue button under the desk. "The Captain will be waiting for you down in the Hub."

"Oh, you're not coming down then?"

"Oh no General I have a mountain of work I really need to finish."

Normally Ianto would accompany them down to the Hub, but Jack thought it would be a good idea to make them squirm, apparently they could get lucky and they would get lost. Once they were through the door Gwen gave two thumbs up to the camera in the corner and sat behind the desk once more.

Jack smiled over to Ianto. "Phase one is complete."

"Phase? I wasn't aware we made any phases."

"Oh we didn't, I just always wanted to say that."

When the General and his crony walked through the cog door, Jack bounded down the stairs to greet them.

"General Shipper." Jack said taking the General's hand. "And who may I ask is this?" Jack said, referring to the person who had become the General's shadow.

"This is 2nd lieutenant Smith."

"Nice to meet you Lieutenant Smith. Come on then let's get this mess sorted then shall we."

When they arrived at the conference room Ianto said "General, how good to see you again, take a seat, you too Lieutenant."

"Thank you mister Jones." Said the General

"Would you like a coffee?"

"Um, no thank you I would rather if we got this situation sorted as soon as possible."

"Of course."

"Now," the General said facing Jack. "How exactly did Torchwood become involved in the Mathew Davies situation?"

"He found us." Said Ianto

"How?" the General was still facing Jack, even though it was obvious that Ianto would be answering his questions.

"The same way he found you."

"So after the warning I gave him and after I told him what he did was against Earth security, he just did it again."

"With all due respect sir, you didn't give him much choice."

"I gave him two mister Jones."

"Yes General you did give him two, one was for him to be locked up in a concrete cell smaller than my bathroom for the rest of his life and the other to forget who he is, what he stands for and how his family died. You gave him two choices that give him no honour."

"You are acting like you are opposed to retcon when you give it out like aspirin."

"That brings me to my next point General, where exactly did you get retcon from? It is a recipe that only Torchwood employees have access too."

"We have our ways."

"You mean you hacked into our files and accessed confidential information and used it for your own benefit. Remind me General isn't that what you are accusing Mathew of? Only he didn't use the information he found, he kept it too himself and went found help from someone else."

"We already know the risks we already know what we are doing. He had no idea what he was accessing."

"No you only got the recipe because you hated the fact that Torchwood knows things that UNIT doesn't. I have news for you; we know a whole lot more." Ianto's voice was starting to rise.

The General finally broke his gaze with Jack to look intently at Ianto. "Mister Jones, I would appreciate it if you did not speak to me like that."

"General Shipper I feel I should remind you that UNIT has all the authority over Torchwood as a piece of shit. We are completely separate from you, in fact we are above you, and if I told you to fuck yourself right now you would have absolutely no choice but to obey. So I am very sorry mister Shipper but I really couldn't care less about how you would appreciate being spoken too."

"As you can see General Shipper my team really don't take to kindly to people, no matter how small, getting their rights removed. I have tried so hard ever since I took over Torchwood three to keep a strong relationship between us, you have needed our help on more than one occasion and I knew that the time would come when we would need you. Are you really going to let this incident stand in the way of that?" said Jack.

"Captain, what Mathew did was against so many laws."

"Yes it was, but the fact that he was able to do it proves just how smart he really is. Why condemn someone for their intelligence? He belongs in university not in a cell. You did the same exact thing to Toshiko Sato, don't do it again."

"It's protocol Captain."

"Protocol? OK lets talk protocol, Mathew is in Torchwood custody until such time as I see fit to release him and as I reminded you yesterday, he can't be touched while he is in said custody."

"No Captain, we can't touch him this is very true. But how long can you keep him in your custody? We can wait, you see I have done my research; Torchwood can only keep someone in custody for two years before charges are to be laid. Any longer than that they have to be released, or handed over to UNIT." The General said with a smug smile.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Its protocol." The General and the Lieutenant rose from there seats and walked out of the conference room.

"You can't do this!" Jack said before they walked out of the Hub.

"I think you'll find that we can." The General said before they walked through the cog door.

"FUCK!" jack yelled when they left. "Ianto!"

"Yes Jack?"

"Find a loop hole"

"I'll do my best."

Jack knew if anyone could find a loop hole it was Ianto Jones, only he did not hold high hopes, something told him that Mathew wasn't going to get out of this. Four hours later Ianto came running into the Hub from the archives.

"JACK!"

"What did you find something?" Jack said running out of his office.

"Maybe, but you're not going to like it."


So what did you think? Sorry for leaving with a cliff hanger but I couldn't resist, I have wanted to do one ever since I saw the last episode of Who! Please let me know what you think! Love you all!