A bit of a short chapter. Short but sweet.
Chapter Two: Welcome to Sporks
"Bella… Bella!…Bellla?……Bella!!… BEEEEEELLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAA!" The mysterious voice droned on, attempting to add unnecessary drama to the situation. The mysterious voice failed miserably.
"Your success at being dramatic does not exist… so, stop," Bella's succinct analysis caused the mysterious voice to become sad and in turn, mope around like a depressed reject. "Can you just tell me whatever it was that was sooo important from the last chapter?"
The mysterious voice gazed at Bella, then, in a barely audible whisper, "Bella… I… am… your… FATHER!!" The mysterious voice stepped into the light, and Bella clearly recognized Charlie's features. Her father suddenly whipped out a gun from it's holster on his "police utility belt" or whatever the hell Charlie, the failure of a police chief, wore. He pointed it from side to side as if he were James Bond, ready to shoot if need be. "Is anybody following you!?"
"…no," Bella said, then sighed in annoyance.
"Oh." Charlie re-holstered his dangerous gun. Then, in an extremely monotone voice, Charlie said, "Well, this sure is exciting. Let's get your stuff in the car and go home, mmkay? I made some pancakes as a 'Welcome to Sporks' present."
The thought of pancakes made Bella incredibly angry. So, Bella snarled at her father threateningly, causing him to whimper.
"Pancakes? A present?" Bella asked evilly.
"Why, yes," Charlie replied, undeterred. "Whad'ya expect? A vehicle of some kind?"
"Yes…"
"Yeah right!" Charlie scoffed. "Don't worry, Bells. Pancakes equal love!" Charlie could no longer hold in his excitement and began to twirl around his police cruiser like a happy little ballerina. Bella didn't even bother to figure out what he was doing, and instead loaded her bags into the back of the car. After the last bag had been stowed away, Charlie ceased twirling, and they got in the car.
"Thanks for your help, dad," Bella, in a huffy mood, said sarcastically.
"Hey, I'm new at this, okay? I'm trying, though!" Charlie said, adopting what was seemingly a caring parent's tone.
"Yeah, alright," Bella knew Charlie was being sincere… or at least she thought he was… his next statement completely withdrew any attempt at creating an emotional connection with his daughter -
"I sensed your sadness and thought my beautiful dance would lift your spirits!" Charlie mused, an insurmountable level of glee in his voice.
"Well, it didn't help and it made me realize that you are a gay, GAY man," she spat.
"Oh, shut up, Bella. You cannot ruin my mood because the pancakes that await in my domain erase all of your negativity!"
Bella cringed, peering out the passenger side window. The rain droplets on the glass mirrored her tears.
In the next chapter, the plot actually goes somewhere! Maybe… I already wrote it, but kinks need to be ironed out. See you soon, darlings.
