DISCLAIMER: I'm not J.K. Rowling and I don't claim to be here. I don't own any of the characters from Harry Potter.

Sorry about taking so long to post. I needed to read two books and start and finish a project. And I've been completely mortified about asking a nine-year-old if she was five. (My excuse was that I couldn't see well in the dark.)

I hope you enjoy this. There's even a little poem/letter from one of Gilderoy's admirers.

Chapter 4

Strangely, Lockhart didn't even feel that bad as he heard Datura's footsteps fading away. He tried not to think about his newly found memories, but even autographing photos to give away to all the Healers in the building didn't take away the emotions that washed over him. Before he had been riding the slightly rocky ripples of confusion, but now that the wave he had been dreading had knocked him nearly senseless and started to ebb away, he started feeling the true shock that he didn't have time to experience before that wave hit.

How many more things had he done that he didn't know about? At one time, he might have said that he was relieving them of some painful memories that would weigh on their existences, but now he knew that he had swiped their happiest memories as well. And he didn't know for sure what he might have said about not-so-delicately extracting memories and throwing them away, or whatever happens to memories when they're gone. He had ripped them from their identities, and that was all that counted.

Who was Lockhart? Apparently he was no one good. Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, five time winner of Witch Weekly's Most-Charming-Smile award, and fraud.

Now he was Gilderoy Lockhart, ex-fraud, a victim of permanent spell damage, resident of St. Mungo's, and one of the least favorite Defense Against the Dark Arts professors (unless the vote of the female population of Hogwarts counts).

Those dreams he was having couldn't be real, could they? Was it normal for someone who has had their memory modified to start to remember?

"Gilderoy, are you feeling okay?" asked Rosie. She had noticed the same dazed expression on his face that he had when he first came into St. Mungo's.

"Yes, I am feeling perfectly all right," he said, flashing his very white teeth at her. A smile from him acted almost exactly like a Memory Charm.

And then he remembered. Did Rosie know about him being a fraud? Was Datura about to tell her? Rosie would hate him if she knew. But it was safe to assume that she didn't know by the way that she smiled back at him, eyes crinkling. Who would bring him food? Who would help him tame his unruly waves when they acted up? Who would help him pick out robes that matched his ward? Who would help him answer the fan mail? He was sure that he wouldn't be able to survive without her.

"That strange distant look is back," Rosie murmured. "Sometimes you aren't physically hurting when something is pressing down on your mind. Is that what it feels like now?"

Gilderoy would just have to tell her. He bit his lower lip to keep it from trembling. What would be the best way to tell her? 'I've just found out that I'm a fraud and I don't remember being a fraud' or 'I've been walking around modifying memories so that I can take credit for what they've done over the course of their lives'? Neither was really good.

"Is that what it feels like now?" she repeated. Concern for him practically dripped from her mouth.

"No," he lied, clasping his hands behind his back. "I'm really fine."

"Okay then. Maybe I'm just imagining it, but you do look a bit peaky. You should try to get more rest tonight."

A pleased glint jumped to his eyes. "I always get at least ten hours of beauty sleep," he chanted wisely.

Her face softened. "Good. Well, I'm going to step out for the night. Datura is staying here tonight to make sure none of the patients need me while I'm away. I hope my kids haven't had dinner yet. Goodnight, Gilderoy."

"Goodnight," he called after her as she slipped out of the door. He repressed a shudder. Datura might strangle him in his sleep.

xVx

Instead of his recommended ten hours of sleep, Gilderoy got only two. At least, he thought it was two. He couldn't be quite sure of the exact number. When he finally went to sleep, he woke up between five and fifteen minutes later. He would drift off again a few hours later. This process would repeat itself over and over until the sun finally broke the horizon.

During the middle of the night, he got a sudden craving for chocolate. Rosie always kept a small stash in the cardboard box under his bed. Making sure that no one was watching, he slid the flaps of the box open and reached down for a chocolate bar. As he unwrapped the foil, he tried to be as quiet as he could. Whenever the foil crinkled or rustled he would immediately freeze, silently hoping that no one had heard. When the foil had all been peeled away and he had in his hands the cure to his craving, he didn't even bother snapping off a piece for himself. He took a large bite out of one corner, savoring the velvety feeling in his mouth. After he had eaten the whole bar, his mouth was coated in chocolate, sticky and warm. He longed for something cool and refreshing to drink.

But Rosie had gone home to her family for the night and only Datura was left there, so he stifled a moan and tried to go to sleep.

He woke up with his mouth sticky around the corners and with some hardened chocolate pasted to his cheeks.

He tried to pass the time until Rosie would be there. It was nine and Rosie would arrive at ten. Better yet, Datura would go home, wherever that was. He smoothed an exfoliating scrub over his cheeks and forehead after washing his face of all chocolate. He tried to occupy himself with reading the new stack of mail that he hadn't gotten a chance to read the day before.

One letter, from Eliza McKinley, expressed her gratitude at his help finding a unique cream that gets rid of blemishes. In the form of a poem.

Now that my pimples are all gone

And my skin is creamy white,

All the boys look at me

In a different light

Thank you, kind sir

For your piece of advice,

Never again shall I

Call on you again after thinking thrice

Now I have a steady boyfriend

All thanks to you,

I am so sorry

That this letter is horribly overdue

I swear I'll never write again

(Partly because my boyfriend thinks you're full of it)

But I'll say thanks one last time

Now I'll leave you alone, you gorgeous dimwit

It was possibly the most flattering letter Gilderoy had ever gotten. He smiled at her gratitude. All in a day's work.

xVx

Lockhart had made up his mind. He was going to tell Rosie. Emily, the girl from his dreams – memories, was in Romania. And Gilderoy was going to go to Romania. And take Rosie along.

Rosie stepped into his ward, surprised to see him right there, waiting for her. "Hello Gilderoy," her voice was mildly curious. "What are you up to?"

"I need to tell you something." His voice wavered a little, but he knew exactly what he was going to say. He had half an hour to write and memorize his lines. Now he just had to deliver them like a perfect actor. "Do you know why I'm in this ward right now?"

"You had a dodgy wand and your spell backfired."

"Yeah," he said, not expecting an answer. That had been a rhetorical question. "Wait… You knew about me knowing how to modify memories?" Now Lockhart knew. When Datura had used Legilimency on him, he hadn't seen that memory. So that was how he ended up in this ward…

Rosie just smiled. "Of course I knew, sweetie. I'm your Healer. I'm supposed to know these things."

"Does anyone else know," Lockhart couldn't keep his voice from being strained.

"Nope. It's all confidential." He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well, it isn't anymore. Datura knows."

"Oh, that dear girl is sweet, but she is way too by-the-rules. I guess it has to do with being chosen as a Prefect once. She was a little rowdy when she was a Prefect, but Datura was proud of her status. When she wasn't chosen for Head Girl she assumed that she hadn't been strictly following the rules as Dumbledore expected her to." Rosie sighed. "When she was a teenager she tried to grow up too fast. I suppose she's cross with you now."

"Yes, but I didn't want you to talk to me about her. You see, I've been having these strange dreams and I'm pretty sure that they're memories. I remember modifying her memory. Her name was Emily and she was studying dragons in Romania. So I have a question I need to ask you…"

Rosie gave a nod that clearly indicated that he should go on.

"Will you come with me to Romania?" Rosie started to speak, but Gilderoy went on. "I'll go either way. With or without you," he warned.

"That just isn't practical," she said soothingly. "I have children and a husband. I can't just leave them."

Lockhart nodded, as if he understood. But his mind is still stuck on four words.

We're going to Romania.

I'm not going to post for about a week because I have to skim Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them for any information I could use concerning dragons. And I also have to research about Romania.

I hope you liked this chapter.

-R