Voices in My Head: Chapter 7

Note I:Ok, so my layout has become a little fucked. Ya see, I've combined a few chapters, so the numbering is all off and I'm not even done with it. It just sorta dropped off at one point and I have no idea where to go next…the last chapter I'd written on it isn't for about 7 chapters (that is, if I don't combine any more) and that one aint even the final chapter. I need to figure out where to go after that when I'm done with this chapter.

Note II: I've thought up another chapter-fic for when I'm done with this baby. I'll go more into detail about it when I finish this fic.

Oh, today was my sister's birthday…I made her cake!! Ahaha, it was lop-sided XD

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Sam was driving. Dean hadn't even complained. In fact, he hadn't said a word since they'd gotten in the car; and to be honest, Sam was feeling a bit worried about him.

Sam had walked into his parents' motel room to find John right in Dean's face, barking at him for answers. Sam, having seen the hidden fear in his brother's eyes, ran over and pushed John back, hard.

"Sam!"

"Boys, please, don't start-"

"What the hell do you think you're doing??!"

"Trying to get answers, and he's being too vague!"

"Boys!"

"What??! Dad! He just had a nightmare telling us we're all going to kill each other and he's being vague??!"

"He won't answer me!"

"Boys! God damnit! Both of you shut up and let's get out of here!"

Sam's knuckles turned white as he tightened his angry grip on the steering wheel. He was so fucking pissed at his father. If Mary hadn't literally jumped in between the two and screamed at them to get in their cars Sam's would've beat the shit out of John.

He spared a glace at his brother once again, who was staring out the windshield catatonically. He'd tried to get Dean to say something several times in the past hour they've been in the car, but nothing.

Why the hell had one screaming match with their father broken Dean?

--

They made it to Missouri's before the sun had even risen. It was almost four thirty in the morning and Sam was glad Dean had fallen asleep several hours before. It was better to have Dean not moving with his eyes closed than with them open.

Sam paused for a moment, should he wake Dean? Oh course you should, dumbass. What are ya' gonna do? Let him sleep in the car? Then he really wouldn't speak to you. Sam reached over and shook his brother.

"Dean," he said, "Dean, we're here." Dean didn't respond for a minute but then moaned and muttered something incoherent. At least he 'said' something.

John threw open his door, Sam watched through the windshield as Mary scurried over to him and said something, thrashing her hands in the air as she said it. John got a pissed look on his face and opened his mouth to say something, but Mary pushed him back against the car, saying something else and then started to walk towards the Impala, John stayed back. She walked to the driver's side and Sam opened the door. He smiled weakly up at his mom before passing a glance over to a pissed looking John, who was leaning against the truck.

"I told him to wait over there."

Sam nodded and turned back to Dean, in attempts to wake him up again, this time Dean opened his eyes a crack. "Dude, we're here." Sam said with a smile. Dean looked up at Missouri's house, almost nervously, before nodding and getting out of the car, Sam did the same, but didn't move towards the house.

John pulled into a standing position and Dean paused mid-step for a moment just staring at him father, before walking up the steps where Missouri was already waiting. She looked sadly at Dean who gave her an awkward look before going into the house. Missouri nodded at John, although Sam could tell she knew he'd silenced Dean and had a look on her face that said 'We're going to have a long take about this, Winchester.' Missouri looked over to Sam and Mary who still stood by the car, and smiled warmly at them, beckoning them in with her hand before turning back inside.

"He hasn't said a word since dad yelled at him." Sam said, looking at his mother as the two made their way to the house.

Mary bit her lip "Your father just sort of exploded." She said sadly "Your brother was telling us about the dream, and how you'd called Missouri, and John just sort of started to scream." She looked away from her youngest son, ashamed by her husband's behavior.

Sam wrapped his arm around his short mother and pulled her. "It wasn't your fault, ma. Dad's just an ass." Mary tensed slightly at her son's disrespect for his father, but said nothing.

Sam removed his arm from his mother's shoulder as they made it into the house, John walking past them out of the house, looking ticked.

"I sent John to get all your bags, and I already sent Dean up to his room." Both Sam and Mary visibly flinched at the phrase 'his room.' It just reminded them of the last time they were here, when Dean didn't even remember their names. "Sam, why don't you go up and check on him, and Mary, how 'bout some coffee?"

--

Sam walked into Dean's old room to find him looking out the window, and Sam felt an extreme sense of déjà vu. "Dean?" Sam asked

"Sorry I freaked you out in the car, Sam." Dean said with a sigh. Sam stood silent. "Every time you kept lookin' at me I knew you were freaked out. But…I just needed to collect my thoughts, ya know?"

Sam nodded, but then felt stupid because Dean's back was to him and said "Yea." he walked into the room and leaned against the wall next to the window "What did dad say to you?"

"It's not what he said…" Dean paused "It's—when he was yelling at me for not coming to him before calling Missouri, all I could think was how much I wanted to kill him." He turned to Sam "And all these visions of killing him in his sleep filled my head and…" Dean trailed off "Maybe I am a monster." Dean said quietly

Sam's eyes widened. Dean hadn't been quiet because John had said something harsh, but because he'd had thoughts of killing him? No, not Dean. "Dean," Sam said, "You are not a monster. You kill monsters, you protect people from monsters, but you are not a monster."

Dean bit his lip and looked to his brother "I don't even know anymore, Sammy."

--

Sorry, another shorty! But, hey! I have no homework this weekend cuz I had 3 tests on Friday, and I already finished my project a week in advance. But I still have a religion project to do, and it's a big one, so while I'm working on that bitch the chaps may only come every other week. Sorry guys!

Anyway, hope you enjoyed, review as always! Later lovlies!

-claire