I am so mad right now :( Because I was looking at Bumblebee's bio for no good reason and saw that he was supposed to be Hot Shot in animated, but they changed his name to Bumblebee . . . grrr, I'm sick and tired of him taking Hot Shot's place! . . . hhh, but anyways I'm better and back :) Since I'm at the library for you guys. Enjoy :)

Ratchet hated being on leave away from his true friends who were still stuck in hard war. He wanted to be out there and help them fight against the Decepticons, but 'NO' Magnus thinks he's incapable of thinking like a normal 'bot. While he was stuck here his friends were probably getting murdered. He knew how bad the war had gotten, and that is exactly why he needed to be out with them for they needed him to patch them up if ever they fall.

He wondered how many of his friends would get killed because he wasn't there to back them up. Too much has already happened 'because' of him, now more things were. He was young and restless he didn't need to be sent on leave. He didn't know what to do because of all this, he didn't know what to do with safety and peace.

Arcee had been sent to Disaster Recovery, a place for the handicap transformers. Those with all sorts of problems went there to try and recover from whatever happened to them. They said Arcee might be a full patient considering her condition. Even though Ratchet knew she was in good hands he still wanted to check up on her and make sure she was well.

Though he'd stay clear from her hoping she won't cry and run from him again. Those who saw him come there regularly knew who he was and knew he was the reason she was there. Though no one blamed him for all knew the WHOLE story. Most of the patients they got where old released prisoners of war . . . it was always a Decepticon to cause damage like this.

The caretakers and medics there adored Arcee. They all said she was as sweet as could be considering she didn't really know them or where she was at. As time passed she began to remember things and places around her. Not about the past, just the present.

Every week Ratchet had to go to Preceptor and tell him how his week was or a little more about his past life. Ratchet didn't like it at all, but had to deal with it. He wished he could do without it, but if he skipped it Magnus get on his aft for sure and make sure he's on leave for another good four months. He had no choice but to abide.

As Ratchet came back every week to Preceptor he entered the room and closed the door heading for his usual seat, but was stopped by what Preceptor said-

"How was Arcee Ratchet?"

"Oh she's fi--how did you know I-?!" started Ratchet, but Preceptor answered for him.

"Like I said . . . I know more about you than you think," said Preceptor folding his hands and looking at him. "Ultra Magnus stopped by and I had no choice but to tell him."

"YOU TOLD HIM!?" gasped Ratchet his mouth dropping open.

"Yes, he wanted an update on your condition," said Ratchet rubbing his cheek with his index finger.

"And just what exactly IS my condition Dr.?" asked Ratchet baring his teeth.

"It's your obsession for miss Arcee," said Preceptor.

"I am NOT obssessed with he-" started Ratchet, but was cut off again.

"Going to the Disaster Recovery clinic every day, asking how Arcee's coming along, and watching her for about an hour each making sure you're not seen by her," said Preceptor reading his notes he jotted down before.

"What gives you a right to spy on my personal life?!" asked Ratchet.

"I'm your psychiatrist Ratchet, I have a right to know if you took an oil change earlier this morning," said Preceptor.

Ratchet just shut his mouth then and there. If he spoke any more Preceptor would know what he did 2 millenniums ago to which he didn't even know about. Ratchet just sat down and let Preceptor stare at him. He stared for a good long time like he was trying to figure out something.

Ratchet just rolled his optics and looked away from him. Just as soon as he crossed his arms Preceptor asked-

"I don't understand everything about you, you know Ratchet?"

At that Ratchet turned to meet his optics. In his own was confusion and in Preceptors was that of bewilderment. Preceptor soon at back in his seat and asked-

"I can't figure out why you continue to see Arcee. What's past is past was your motto, but you just let this get to you. I'm sure you've seen worse and more attractive femmes so it leaves one to wonder why Arcee? Why this mission to get to you?"

"And here I thought you knew everything," chuckled Ratchet.

"I'm here to help you know the answers to such questions," said Preceptor.

"Then why do I still wonder why?" asked Ratchet his facial features growing more mournful by the millisecond.


"Is Arcee here today?" asked Ratchet at the front desk.

The femme in charge just smiled recognizing this regular and so pointed into the main room where a few patients were out sitting and talking to loved ones. Ratchet turned to see Arcee was talking to someone and gasped when he realized who it was. He had no time to leave before the transformer turned and saw him with displeased optics.

"Ratchet," his voice came out in a warn. "Front and center."

"Yes sir," sighed Ratchet dropping his shoulders and coming to the commander who now stood up and his his hammer close.

"Hi, who are you?" asked Arcee with a kind smile to Ratchet. "My name is Arcee and this is ultra Magnus."

Ratchet's spirits just dropped more hearing her voice. Even lower seeing the look in Ultra Magnus' optics as they peered down on him.

"I'd like to have a word with you soldier," said Ultra Magnus.

"Yes sir," said Ratchet following him into a quiet room.

As soon as the door was shut Ultra Magnus turned to him with a mean look on his face. He didn't speak for a while, but when he did he let Ratchet have it.

"Do you know why I was talking to Arcee Ratchet?" he asked pacing back and forth in front of the medic.

"I could take a guess," said Ratchet with a small smile as he twiddled his fingers together.

"I was told by your psychiatrist that you have been going here to see her," said Ultra Magnus. "I had hoped you wouldn't do this so not to open up old wounds. I was pleased to find you haven't made contact with Arcee, but still displeased knowing you decide to take your leave to see a victim of a cruel accident because of a Decepticon bounty hunter."

"I just wanted to see how she was doing and if she could remember anything," said Ratchet.

"Well you have seen how she was doing and as you saw she was doing fine, as for her memory they say she'll never remember, and some trauma to old 'wounds' or hurts could react in her to lose her memory yet again!" said Ultra Magnus raising his left metal brow.

"I never meant for her to be like that," said Ratchet. "I just wanted to see her . . . never talk to her."

"But who's to say you won't change your mind?" asked Ultra Magnus. "Look Ratchet . . . I know you, yourself, went through hurt at losing someone . . . yet . . . not. I can't imagine what that must be like on a medic 'bot."

"No . . . you can't," said Ratchet dropping his head and shoulders. "It's . . . different than losing someone."

"So let her go like the others Ratchet," said Ultra Magnus placing a hand on his shoulder. "Can you at least try to be that old Ratchet we all have come to love?"

"I can try sir . . . but I can't promise you he'll come back," said Ratchet.


"And then he said I couldn't see her anymore," sighed Ratchet as he spoke to Preceptor.

"Well if you want to not be court marshaled you better listen," said Preceptor placing his index finger on his lower lip.

"I am good at following orders and hate when I screw things up," said Ratchet making his hands into fists. "I hate when anyone disobeys their commander's orders, but something . . . something inside me is telling me I should continue to see her and maybe even try to talk to her."

"What do you think it is?" asked Preceptor his optics narrowing.

"I don't know, Primus perhaps, me," said Ratchet shaking his head. "I can't tell unless I try I guess."

"Do you think you should?" asked Preceptor.

"I know . . . that is I do you'll only tell Magnus and get me into more trouble than I can handle," said Ratchet.

"So will that stop you then?" asked Preceptor joting down a few more things.

Ratchet thought about it for a moment and then with a smile forming on the edge of his lips he looked at Preceptor and proudly said-

"The pit no."


Ultra Magnus was done for the night and so decided to go check up on Ratchet. He went to the place where he was supposed to be staying and found he was no where to be found. So then he thought he stayed late with Preceptor. He came to Preceptor and again found he was no one.

"Preceptor," said Ultra Magnus coming up to the 'bot who was getting ready to head out. "Where is Ratchet?"

"Oh he didn't tell you?" asked Preceptor.

"Tell me what?" asked Ultra Magnus crossing his arms knowing it was going to have something to do with Arcee.

"He decided to go visit old friends that have gotten leave as well," said Preceptor plainly.

"Oh . . . well," said Ultra Magnus letting all his worries go. "Tell me when he gets back then."

"I will sir," said Preceptor as he watched the large 'bot leave.

Preceptor just hoped Ultra Magnus wasn't the type to check twice just in case.


"Is Arcee around?" asked Ratchet at the front desk.

"Yes she is sir, but it's getting late and we're closing down for vi-" she started.

"I know, but I just need to speak to her," said Ratchet.

Her optics widened a bit as he said 'speak to her'. She knew, along with everyone else, that Ratchet never spoke to Arcee. It was something everyone talked about. This Ratchet always coming to see his Arcee, but never speak to her and make sure she never saw him.

She couldn't pass up this oppurtunity for the two to speak. She had wanted the two to get along and speak together, but Ratchet always insisted he never. So she shook her head and said-

"Alright, just this once . . . Arcee's out in the back walking through the maze."

"Thank-you," said Ratchet walking off rather quickly so to find her.

The stars were shining now at this time of night, something Ratchet hardly got to see on the battle field so he passed them without knowing it. His mind was set on her, Arcee. He found the maze and walked through it quickly. He had come out on the other side wondering what he had done wrong . . . He had not seen her so he entered again and went through other places where dead ends would be.

Once he entered some other ways he halted seeing Arcee come through. She was looking up at the stars just admiring their beauty and how close they were. Right when he saw her his mouth froze and he couldn't speak.

Not again! he thought.

She still had no noticed him as she came to walk right by him. He then forced himself to speak right after he grabbed her wrist with tender care. This stopped Arcee and so made her turn and look at him in wonderment. She had not said anything, and either had he.

He tried to speak, but found he was mute again and so grumbled to himself and metally kicked himself in the head. He bowed his head just as soon as Arcee said-

"Oh, hello again. My name is Arcee what is yours?"

"Ratchet," he actually said looking up at her with sorrowful optics. "It's Ratchet."

At that Arcee let out a sweet and kind smile almost like she knew him and liked the name. She tilted her head a bit the the left and said with such tender-

"Ratchet."

Ratchet's features just melted as he heard her say his name again almost in the same way she had before. He let out a sigh and smiled just a bit forgetting he still had a hold of her wrist. Arcee was confused why he was like this and so asked-

"Why are you so sad Ratchet?"

"Because of you," sighed Ratchet bowing his head.

"I'm sorry, what have I done? You must excuse me I can't remember anything that happened before I was brought here," she said in apology.

"No, you did nothing wrong," said Ratchet.

"Then what?" she asked her optics reflecting the stars.

"I can't . . . say," he said bowing his head again.

"Oh . . . I see," said Arcee bowing her head as well.

She then noticed Ratchet's grip on her wrist and so looked at him and asked-

"What do you want from me?"

"What? Why do you say that?" asked Ratchet looking at her again.

He then noticed his grip on her wrist and so quickly took it off and backed away a bit.

"No, I didn't mean to-" he started but Arcee smiled and spoke.

"I see, you want me."

At that she did something Ratchet was not expecting. She had opened her spark chamber and was willing to give herself to him right there and now. His optics widened and took her wrists in his hands and took her a little closer only to make things clearer.

"No Arcee, no," he said.

"I have seen this before," she said. "Others have done this."

"I know, but this is not what I want from you," he said calmly closing her spark chamber.

She watched him closer her spark chamber and then looked up at him in confusment.

"Then what do you want?" she asked in wonder.

"I don't really know myself," said Ratchet with an uneasy chuckle.

"Arcee!" called one of the staff members. "It's time for your recharge. Come inside!"

"Yes, I will," said Arcee shaking her head.

She then looked at Ratchet who still stood just as close to her as he was. His hands still on her wrists that rested on his chest. She looked at his face and saw the pain of not knowing what to do at the moment and wanted to just spend more time with her. She looked at his hands still on her wrists and just thought to herself.

She wondered who this was. She thought he must have been important to her and that is why he wanted to stay with her. She just smiled thinking of getting to know him like she probably had before. He could become just as close as before and he seemed kind enough to like to be around.

She smiled and looked up at Ratchet saying-

"Will you come and see me tomorrow?"

This snapped Ratchet out his his own thoughts of blowing his only chance to speak to her. He looked at her with normal optics and looked at her as she smiled at him so kindly. All he could do was shake his head and say-

"If you want me to Arcee."

He couldn't deny her anything. She then smiled biting her bottom plump lip. It was like she was a young teenager getting the opportunity to see a boyfriend later on regularly. The staff member then called her again.

"Arcee!"

"I'm coming!" she called back her tone a bit annoyed as if she wanted to stay with him a bit longer. "Come and see me tomorrow night. Meet me here, I'll be waiting for you."

She then pulled away from him, but the gentle tug of his hands caused her to stop. Even though she had not remembered much about anything she had been taught about common things now like feelings and gestures and meanings of things. She quickly turned to Ratchet and hopped on her right leg for a bit just to she could reach her face up to his face. In a quick millisecond she gave him a kiss on the cheek and ran off inside smiling like a young protoform having her first crush.

Ratchet let out a soft gasp as she did this and slowly moved his hand to where she kissed him as he watched her run inside. He hadn't expected that and wondered if Arcee knew the meaning of what she did. He wondered if he had to watch what she did to make sure she was sure of anything. He wondered if she did know and so this caused him to bring out a small smile that he hadn't smiled in a while.

He'd now protect her from all 'bots that wished to take advantage on her like he could have done. He'd help her now in realizing how important it was to know these things, but what Ratchet forgot to do as he planned this out, he forgot to remember to protect his own spark from her like he was supposed to.