Ratchet ran into the hospital where Arcee and Omega had been flown to. He held tightly onto Fender praying to Primus this was just a freak accident. He asked for a doctor so as to know what was going on with his best friend and the love of his life. No one would tell him anything.

He became greatly angered and wanted answers now. He soon let everyone know he what he wanted. He started shouting at the top of his voice capacitors causing everyone to stop and stare. He hadn't even noticed he started making Fender cry.

"Sir, sir please calm down," said a nurse seeing it wasn't good for the sparklign or everyone around him.

"NO!!" shouted Ratchet pointing a harsh finger at her. "Don't tell me to be calm when my best friend my be offline and my bonded might not know who she is anymore!!"

He then let his sad emotions overwhelm him and it was then he noticed his little son's cries for him to stop shouted. He just bowed his head and held Fender closer saying—

"I'm so sorry Fender . . . Daddy's just—so tired."

The nurse understood his grief and so left to find a doctor. She came back with one and Ratchet looked at him. He asked if he'd give his son to the nurse before he spoke with him any further. Ratchet reluctantlyagreed and so gave Fender to the nurse so she could care for him.

Ratchet followed the doctor as he began to tell him about Omega and Arcee's conditions. Ratchet's optics widened when Omega's was told. He had went offline and they said they did all they could, but couldn't save him. They placed him back in his vehicle mode, but to bring him back online would take a miracle.

Ratchet bowed his head. His best friend pretty much erased from existance all to save those he loved. He was programmed to do so, but he never thought he'd actually come across a time when there was nothing else for him to do. He never forget him, never.

"As for you sparkmate," sighed the doctor with heavy optics. "I heard about her memory loss before and—"

"Is it the same as before?!" asked Ratchet wanting to now.

"No," sighed the doctor. "It's worse. Now . . . she can't remember anything for a day. Each day that passes she'll forget."

"No!" gasped Ratchet backing up a little. "She can't be like that! Please tell me! Does she remember anything, anything at all?! A name, a face, a emotion!"

"I'm afraid not," said the Doctor. "I'm so sorry Ratchet. I'm so sorry you have to go through this again."

"NO! You're lying!!" growled Ratchet pushing the doctor out of the way and finding Arcee's room.

Once he saw her lying on the berth his mind went right back to the first day he tired to help her remember. She screamed at him for she didn't know who he was, but this was just different. She was his sparkmate, his bonded. Their sparks were linked, they must know each other.

"Arcee," he lightly gasped as he went in to see her.

She turned her head to him as a nurse finished looking at her. She cocked her head to the side and looked at him with confused optics. This broke Ratchet's spark all over again. She forgot all they built up together—she even forgot their Ariel.

"Do I know you?" she asked wanting to know. "I can't seem to remember anything."

"No . . . I suppose you wouldn't," said Ratchet as he bowed his head his spark shattered to where it can never be fixed again.

The nurse looked at him knowing he was her sparkmate and she was very well conformed about her condition. She felt so sorry for him. She kept quiet not wanting to make matters worse. She minded her own business.

Ratchet went to leave, but Arcee sat up pleaded with him not to. This was quite different than before.

"Please," she said to him. "Stay, no one else will help me. You look kind, will you?"

Ratchet turned to her and tried to speak, but he was so overwhelmed with sadness he couldn't. He bowed his head and only wished to die. She placed his hands on his chest that curled up into fists so angered with how life was unfair to him and his family.

"Don't be sad, what did I do?" she asked confused. "Forgive me. I didn't mean to hurt you in any way."

"It's not," gasped Ratchet trying his hardest to look her in the optics. "It's not you . . . it's life. Life is . . . it has . . . broke me."

"Oh, well I'm sure a doctor can help you," she said only trying to help.

"No, I AM a doctor and yet . . . I don't know what to do about this," he said his optics dim with sadness. "I've been told to be prepared for anything, but this . . . I can't do it anymore!!"

At that he turned and ran from her. Arcee managed to stand up and reach out to him. As she did she felt a sharp jolt run through her spark to her mainframe. All she saw was a picture of this strange mech smiling like he was once happy.

She tried to speak and move, but she was frozen. The nurse had never seen anything like this and so she touched her on the shoulder and asked—

"Arcee, are you alright?!"

Arcee was frozen and engulfed in one memory—

The name's . . . Ratchet, came to her mind and then the sound of her own voice saying with such soft kindness and love—Ratchet.

"Arcee do you need me to call a doctor?" asked the nurse.

Arcee then gagged out a name she, herself, didn't think she knew.

"R-ratchet."

The nurse's optics widened as she heard Arcee recall Ratchet's name from sheer memory. This had never been done before. Ratchet hadn't even told her his name, so how could she have remembered this? It was then Arcee's joints released her from lock and she felt faint.

The nurse helped her back to her berth and just as soon as she laidher down she ran out to find a doctor and inform him about what had just happened. Ratchet walked, nearly, out of the hospital before he was stopped by a nurse who gave him his son back. He almost forgot Fender, the last thing he had from Arcee. He looked at Fender who had stopped crying and decided to suck on his small hands.

He looked at him with agony and pain. How could he raise a child without his mother and him being in this state of mind? He bowed his head as he held Fender close and tight almost making him cry again. Ratchet then inhaled and headed out of the hospital never looking back for he knew he had lost too many now.

Just as soon as he left a doctor tried to find him to tell him about Arcee, but he was gone. He had gone back home which had just been secured by the Autobots as they chased away the last remaining Decepticons. He came in and sat down on his table next to a counter which held many holograms of his once happy family. He looked at it with sad heavy optics and saw one of him holding Ariel on his shoulders and Arcee with her arms wrapped around him.

He looked at another which was when they first brought Fender home. He was hope he was to this broken family. Arcee began to smile again and fall in love with sparklingsand he began to take better care of himself since he had a little one to live for. His optics soon fell on Fender and he held him close saying—

"I'm so sorry I let you and your mother down. I don't know what we'll do Fender . . . I can't find happiness any more."

Fender gave out a little squeal/childish grunt that made Ratchet chuckle a little, but it soon turned into sadness. He didn't know what to do any more. No training on Cybertron ever prepared him for the sparkbreak of life. Why couldn't Primus smile on him instead of frown?

It wasn't long since he was sitting there till Ultra Magnus showed up at the door. He entered and saw Ratchet wallowing in grief. He came to him and said—

"Ratchet have you not heard yet?"

"What?" asked Ratchet slowly looking at him.

"Arcee, she remembered your name," he said.

At that Ratchet's optics widened and a glint of hope shinned through. He shot up out of his chair and placed Fender on his shoulder asking—

"H-how do you know?! And did she remember all by herself?!"

"The doctors have been looking for you, come with me," said Ultra Magnus turning and leading him back.

There, back at the hospital, the doctors told him about Arcee. Ratchet grew concerned she'd forget the next day. When it came she did, but not his name. Ratchet couldn't have been more happy.

Ultra Magnus gave him leave to see to Arcee's recovery and perhaps help her remember everything just like before. Ratchet tried his best, but she kept forgetting each day. The only thing she remembered was his name and so Ratchet thought she might remember he son's and so took Fender to her one day and let her hold him.

"Fender," she said with a smile. "Is he yours Ratchet?"

"Ours," he said with a smile.

"You mean . . . you mean we're sparkmates?" she asked looking at him.

Ratchet smiled and shook his head. He sighed and he looked at Fender cuddle in to his mother and sigh. He looked at Arcee and said—

"You see, he knows his mother."

"Me, I had him?" she asked with wide optics as she looked down at him. "I had a sparkling?"

"We had—two, but . . . she was taken from us at a young age," said Ratchet.

"Oh—oh my," she said feeling her spark sink into sadness. "I can, I can feel the sadness. What was her name?"

"Ariel," said Ratchet. "And she looked just like you."

"Ariel," said Arcee trying her hardest to remember her face, but found she couldn't. "I wish I could remember, but—I'm trying but I can't. Ratchet did I love her?"

"What does your spark tell you?" he asked as he placed his hand on top her spark chamber.

She stared for a moment at his hand over her spark. Her spark felt warm now full of happiness and yet she didn't know why. She turned to Ratchet and slowly took her hand and placed it on top his spark chamber and felt the soft pulses come from it, but they felt—sad. She looked into Ratchet's optics and said—

"You're sad . . . is it because of me?"

Ratchet bowed his head and said—

"Yes, and no. Not only had I lost you, but my best friend Omega Supreme went offline protecting the Autobots."

"Oh no," gasped Arcee covering her mouth with her hand. "He was dear wasn't he?"

"Yes," sighed Ratchet shaking his head slowly. "Now my only hope is in us. If you can just remember then we could be a family again."

"Well," said Arcee placing Fender back in Ratchet's arms. "Until I can, you keep him safe for me."

"I will Arcee," he said with a smile.

He then leaned in to kiss her like he usually does, but halted realizing she had still forgotten all about him. He caught himself and so pulled away, but Arceesoon placed her hands on the side of his face and gave him a kiss on the cheek. She smiled to him and it caused him to smile back. He could have sworn he caught a blush as she got up and left him. The next day he was informed she had been placed back into Disaster recovery.

He knew she'd be taken good care of there. He trusted them, but what happened the next day broke everything. Arcee had fallen and caused her to forget everything all over again including Ratchet's name. She couldn't remember it and even when he tried to see her he saw no remembrance in her optics, not even hope of one.

She was lost a third time and he couldn't take it. That day he went back home and just fell apart. His sadness overtook his whole body and he couldn't think. He thought that maybe—some day she'd remember thanks to her knowing his name but now—she couldn't remember ANYTHING!!

"PRIMUS WHAT HAVE I DONE?!" he cried upward. "Why do I deserve this?! Plehease tell me 'cause I can't take it anymore!! Why me?! Why my family?!"

As Ratchet wallowed on the floor he hadn't noticed Fender come walking up to him and fall on him for balance. He looked at him and took him in his arms. He was smiling see how he just walked.

"You—you walked!" said Ratchet with a smile looking at his young son.

Fender just smiled and soon Ratchet's face turned grim. He fell on his for balance. Fender looked up to him, but he knew, deep down in his spark, he wasn't the right person to lean on. No he couldn't have Fender hurt as much as him.

Ratchet stood up and held his young son in his arms. His thoughts rested on one thing—his future. Ratchet had made up his mind there and then that he wasn't fit to raise a sparkling, even his own. Fender deserved better care.

He knew he promised Arcee to watch over him till she got better, but now that he saw she wasn't he had no choice. He looked down at Fender and sighed shaking his head saying—

"I guess Primus had decided to take you away from me as well."

It was one of the saddestdays of his life . . . giving away his son. He gave them to relatives in the south. They'd take good care of him and tell him about his creators for what they were . . . not are now. Ratchet didn't want him to be disappointed in them when he was old enough to understand.

At least he had more security to lean on than him. As for Arcee, he bid her farewell. She always wondered why he did so seeing how she had no memory of him. He then came to Ultra Magnus and resigned from the army.

Ultra Magnus was a bit shocked as to why he did this. He was one of their best medics not to mention a great idol to all. He couldn't tell Ultra Magnus the reason why seeing how he wasn't sure himself. Ultra Magnus understood and so left to make it official.

Once Ratchet waited for Ultra Magnus to return he was met by Preceptor who slowly came up to him and said—

"I heard about what happened Ratchet . . . I'm terribly sorry."

"Don't be, it wasn't your fault," said Ratchet casting his optics away from the 'bot.

"In a way I feel as if it was," he said scratching his chin a bit. "I encouraged you in a way to return to Arcee. I was warned not to do so and thought it best if you just left her alone and now . . . I see how much sadness it wouldn't have caused it you would have heeded me."

"It wouldn't have made a difference," shook Ratchet. "Primus just doesn't like me that's all."

"I would say He was testing you and that you've failed," said Preceptor.

"Hhh, what's new?" asked Ratchet feeling so down.

"If I were to giveyou advice I'd say to never give up on Arcee, nor your son, but then again . . . isn't that how you got here in the first place?" he asked.

Ratchet said nothing. He just cast his optics down and away. Preceptor shook his head and sighed before he left—

"I wish you the best of luck on where ever you go in the Universe and I'm sorry your life didn't turn out as much as you hoped it would. Perhaps Primus needs you elsewhere. Good-bye."

At that Preceptor left and Ultra Magnus returned to Ratchet telling him he could retire if he wished, but Ratchet didn't want to do that. He wished to find work elsewhere, somewhere far from Cybertron. Ultra Magnus understood and so sent him off as a space bridge repairer. He allowed him Omega Supreme's form for a ship and later Ratchet got a new crew to act like none of the tragedies that happened to him ever existed.

END FLASHBACK

"And that . . . is pretty much my life," said Ratchet with a heavy sigh to his silenced and stunned audience. "Primus seemed to push life on me the hardest."

"Gee Ratchet I—I didn't know," said Bumblebee feeling a bit sorry for being so mean to him.

"Not many did," said Ratchet with a sigh. "I still miss then with all my spark."

"That's sad how Ariel died," sighed Bulkhead casting his optics down. "She would have probably made a great femme to be around."

"She was," said Optimus with a small sigh. "Even I can still remember her."

"Wait . . . you—were Orion Pax?!" asked Bumblebee pointing to Optimus.

"Yea, why?" asked Optimus.

Bumblebee then breaks out in laughter. He giggles saying—

"MAN! What a dorky name!!"

"What?" said Optimus. "I was named after my father."

"SO!!" cracked up Bumblebee. "What was yours?" he asked to Bulkhead.

"It was Springer," said Bulkhead holding up his hand. "'Cause my wrecking ball seemed to 'spring' out all the time, get it? Oh never mind."

"What about yours?" asked Bumblebee to Prowl.

"I don't think you'd even care," said Prowl.

"Oh, sour circuit, what about yours doc 'bot?" asked Bumblebee.

"Eh, it was Eugene, I was quite glad to be getting it changed," said Ratchet casting his optics elsewhere.

"What about yours huh?" asked Bulkhead raising a metal brow.

"Actually . . . it was Bumblebee . . . that's why I didn't like being named it again," he said touching his index fingers together and looking down.

All couldn't help but laugh. Ratchet sighed and Bulkhead asked—

"Whatever happened to your son?"

"Well," sighed Ratchet rubbing his jaw and looking up a bit. "I heard he enlisted in the Elite Guard and his name changed, pit I even heard his body took on a change to."

"So, you never saw him again?" asked Bumblebee.

"No, I have," said Ratchet with a soft smile placing a hand on Bumblebee's shoulder.

Bumblebee looked at Ratchet for a while and then at his hand on his shoulder and then back at Ratchet. He did this three times till he twitched and cried out—

"NOOOO!!"

At that Ratchet let out the loudest laugh anyone had ever heard him laugh.

"HA HA!!" He laughed. "You actually thought you were my son! Haaa I gotta save that in the hard drive."

"That wasn't funny," mumbled Bumblebee.

"Naw, what I meant was my son's body changed because of his ability to change it into hard metal. I heard they named him Ironhide," he said crossed his arms quite proud of him.

"IRONHIDE?!" gasped Bumblebee and Bulkhead with wide optics and agape mouths.

"Yea, you got a problem with him?" asked Ratchet raising a metal brow at the two youngsters.

"No, no," said Bumblebee. "It's just, we've seen him before and . . . well he looks just like you."

Bumblebee then muttered so Ratchet couldn't hear him—

"I knew there was a reason why I didn't like him."

Ratchet gave out a yawn and then stood up saying—

"Well if you glitches don't mind I'm gonna get back to my stasis nap."

"Have a good one," said Optimus with a smile.

Ratchet just smiled as he left and went into his room. Once he did he locked the door and sat down on a chair that sat in front of a monitor. He sighed as he turned it on and on came the image of his son.

"Hey Ironhide."

"Hey daddy, what's ya callin' for?" he asked in that southern accent of his that Ratchet didn't too much like.

"Hhh, I shouldn't have sent you with your cousins down in the south," he sighed. "How's your mother doing?"

"She's doin' fine," said Ironhide with a smile. "I came to see her today and she had no clue who I was. Same ole."

"I see," said Ratchet casting his weary optics down. "Well, thanks for tellin' me. I'll talk to you later."

"'Kay, Ironhide out," he said before cutting off communications.

After that Ratchet leaned back in his chair and sighed to himself. He shut his optics off and pictured him with his family having a nice picnic. Ariel was there giggling as she chased little Fender around. Him and Arcee, hand in hand, watching their two sparklings live in happiness.

This was all that Ratchet dreamed out and if anyone understood this they'd know why he was was so grumpy when you woke him up. He never wanted to leave this peaceful side of life. It was his only escape from reality and sadness. If they understood . . . then they'd let him sleep to his spark's content.