Tree Houses are for the Birds

These good fellows don't belong to me so I promise when I'm done to pick um up, dust um off and with a kiss on the cheek return them safely home.

"There's no such thing as bravery; only degree's of fear." John Wainwright.


Chapter 3

Kelly watched as Roy hopped up on the exam table, "So what hit you?"

"Not hit me, more like I hit it. I fell down and hit the side of a bathtub," Roy answered as Kelly checked his pupil reactions. Finding the exam normal he felt around the bruise.

"Did you loose consciousness at all?" Kelly asked. He had to turn and look at him when he realized Roy wasn't answering. "Roy?"

"Yea, but only for a minute." He rubbed his head. "Think I was just stunned mostly."

"Do you have a headache?" Kelly asked.

"A little bit. But I'm not lightheaded anymore."

"Anymore? Don't make me start calling you Gage. Give me the whole story Roy and I mean the whole story."

Roy knew Kelly was serious and he suspected upset that they didn't call anything into the base station. So he went into the whole story. He started with the call, the spaghetti, and the odd couple then ended with the bathroom fiasco. This time he included being knocked out and the dizzy spell.

"Ok, Roy. I don't think its anything serious but I want you to come right back if you start having worsening headaches or any other symptoms of a concussion."

"I will doc." Roy was just thankful that he hadn't been yelled at yet.

"One thing more Roy. Exactly why did the two of you decide to drive yourself and not call for help?"

Roy hung his head down, caught.

"Well doc, we got up and assessed each other then laughed at the thought of calling each other in. We seemed pretty much ok so we knew we could get here quicker just by coming on in."

"Assessed each other huh? The injured leading the injured," he shook his head. "Next time call."

Roy knew not to argue, "Ok doc, we will. Can I go check on Johnny now?" Roy was anxious to make sure his partner was ok too.

"Sure, come on. I can't wait to hear his version of the story."


"Well the x-rays look ok Johnny, no broken ribs but your definitely gonna be bruised and sore on that side for a few days." Joe paused, placing his hands in his pockets. He had re-bandaged his earlier head cut and Dixie already had made him strip out of his wet clothes and put on scrubs. Johnny sat on the side of the table being quiet.

Roy and Kelly came into the room with Kelly pulling a chair up to the exam table to make Roy sit down for a while.

"Well Junior, anything broken?"

"Nope, told you, just a bruise. How about your head?" Johnny started swinging his legs like a little kid.

"Just a bump, no big deal. You finally dry?"

"Yea, Dix got me some scrubs."

"See ya got the spaghetti off too." They both laughed.

Kelly, Joe and Dixie just sat back and watched the exchange between the two men in amazement. Once together they both had noticeably perked up, laughing through the great concern they had for each other.

Joe spoke first, "Ok, let me get this straight. She threw the spaghetti at you and that made you fall?"

Dixie stood behind him and tried hard to not giggle this time.

Johnny cocked his head to the side, "No doc, it was more like she slung the spaghetti in my face and I couldn't see."

"Then you fell?" Kelly asked.

"No, no, the spaghetti didn't make me fall it was when I was trying to get the stuff off my face and I kinda turned to Roy. Well, I couldn't see anything." Johnny was getting flustered. "My feet slipped from all the stuff on the floor and I fell."

"Couldn't just fall huh? Had to hit the tub and then land in the water?" Dixie chimed in now giggling.

"You just had to be there. It's like visiting the twilight zone," Johnny replied, trying to explain his way out of this ER visit.

"I don't know Joe, I think were the ones in the twilight zone episode here," Kelly chided them.

"Comedian's. I'm surrounded by comedians."


After being discharged they headed out to the squad.

"I'm telling ya Roy, it's a good thing I've been to your house cause if someone defined marriage by what those two do, they wouldn't last a week." Johnny was just amazed at them, he couldn't figure out why they were so nonchalant about hurting each other.

"Trust me partner, they are the exception, not the rule. Either that or Joanne and I just aren't good at fighting. Don't remember having to use a plate or a chair before." He kept talking as he pulled out of the parking lot, heading back to the station.

Johnny laughed, "Maybe you're just getting some good pointers here Roy." He shifted in his seat, looking at Roy. "Then again, maybe I should warn Joanne."

"Warn her? Don't mention um or you might give her the ideas Junior."


The team was toned out again before they could finally reach the station. Luckily it was a simple call of a child stuck in a stair railing. By the time they returned to the station they had missed lunch. Both had momentarily forgotten their trip to the ER and let hunger lead them straight to the kitchen.

"What the hell happened to you two?" Hank exclaimed as the rag tagged pair moved through the dayroom. Realizing that both of his friends and paramedics had been hurt this time sent Hank into Captain's mode, "My office now."

Mike, Marco and Chet remained quiet following the Cap's brash words to the team. It was obvious they were injured, Cap would find out what happened.

Hank sat down at his desk and watched the two men move into the office, taking note of how slow they sat down. "Mind telling me what's going on?"

Roy felt that as senior paramedic he should take responsibility for what happened and spoke first. "Sorry Cap. We didn't have to take the victim in but wound up falling in a crazy bathroom mess and getting some minor injuries ourselves. We felt ok and decided to just drive to Rampart to get checked out."

Hank eyed them closely, especially Johnny, "Well? Are you two ok to work?"

"Yea Cap. We checked out ok. If it had been anything more serious we would have called you right away." Johnny answered Hanks worried looks, "I have some bruised ribs. Roy has a bump on the head. Brackett told us to come back if we started to feel worse but released us to work."

Hank was visibly relieved to hear that his men were ok and couldn't really blame them for doing what they did. He would have told them the same thing. "Ok, but geeze will you please take it easy? I just finished doing paperwork on John's injuries from earlier. You guys are gonna drown me in paperwork today."

"Sorry Cap," they both said in unison.

Returning to the dayroom Johnny went straight for the refrigerator. "What did ya'll have for lunch?"

"Cold cuts, plenty of leftovers for ya," Marco answered as he headed out into the bay for his assigned duty of cleaning it up.

"Well, better than nothing I guess." Roy helped pull out the leftovers. They were hungry and this point and didn't really care.


Finishing up some lunch and cleaning up they headed out to the dorm. They had dorm duty this shift and hadn't been around long enough to get anything done.

Roy grabbed the broom and started sweeping.

The tones sounded and they stopped to listen. "Engine 51. Trash fire…………………………."

Sighing a big breath of relief they got back to work. Johnny got clean sheets for his bunk.

"Ahhhh!" Johnny yelled.

Roy came running around the brick partition to see what all the noise was about to find Johnny backing up from his bed. The clean sheets now lying in the floor.

"What?"

"My bed, there's a snake in my bed!"

Roy took the broom handle and moved the sheet back again to reveal a large brown snake curled up right in the middle of Johnny's bed. He poked it with the handle and decided it wasn't rubber.

"Don't make it mad," Johnny barked.

Roy took the handle next and slipped it under the curled up form and lifted. Still no movement. "I think its dead."

Johnny walked up to it, took the broom from Roy and poked it harder. Just to make sure. He glanced back at Roy then decided to touch it. It didn't move. "Think your right." Then his eyes lit up, "I'm gonna get that Chet!"

Roy rolled his eyes, great. He went back to mopping; not wanting to even know what the younger part of the team was planning.


As soon as the engine backed into the bay the tones sounded again.

"Station 51, Warehouse fire, …………………………………time out 3:18"

Johnny and Roy looked at each other, sharing the same thought. At least it's not 418.


Assisting with the clean up of the abandoned warehouse Johnny and Roy had been hauling hoses despite their sore achy bodies. Hank called in the time out then moved over to the squad as the men finished up.

"Johnny, Roy you guys can head back." Hank told the men. There had been no injuries luckily and the paramedic team put all the supplies back into the squad. Hank knew they needed some rest.

"Man, I'm ready for some downtime," Johnny told Roy.

"Yea, this day has been unique." He closed up the side compartments of the squad, "You ready?"

"Yea, let's go," as he climbed into the squad." Picking up the radio, "Squad 51 available."

"10-4 51." Then the tones sounded. "Squad 51, please respond to Man down, 418……………..time out 5:55."

"For the love of Mike, this can't be happening!" Johnny exclaimed.

"Looks like they're calling our names again partner, let's go." Roy pulled out onto the main road. "But this time, can we get out in one piece?"

"Maybe we need some police escorts with us." Johnny sounded serious then was shocked at the next transmission.

"Engine 51 requesting police back up with Squad 51 on this call."

"10-4 51, police dispatched."

Johnny and Roy just looked at each other.

"Guess Cap's taking this serious huh Junior?"

Johnny was glad, no complaints from him at all.


They once again pulled up and got the needed boxes out. Looking at each other they made a silent pact to get through this call as quickly as possible. This time the door wasn't open so Roy knocked. No answer. He knocked again. And again, no answer. Johnny looked into the living room window and could see Amy sitting on the couch reading a book. Under any other circumstance it wouldn't occur to them to enter the house on their own. But they knew this couple and more than likely someone was hurt somewhere.

They were both relieved to see Vince pull up just about then. "John, Roy, what's up?"

"This is our 3rd call out here today and we keep getting caught in the middle of their arguments so guess Cap decided to send us some help this time," Johnny updated him.

Vince knew these men well and as he listened to the story he took in the bruises, scraps and bandages. "Ok, well, let's do it then."

Roy reached for the door knob, it was unlocked. Pushing the door open he entered first.

With trepidation they approached Amy. "Mrs. Kilgore?" Johnny said. She looked up to the two men looking at them like she had no idea why they were there. Johnny continued, "Are you hurt?"

She looked ok but one couldn't be sure with them. Getting no response, "Is your husband hurt somewhere?"

She nodded to him, "He's on the back porch waiting for you." She went back to her book.

Roy quickly looked and saw the door from the kitchen which led outside. They stepped out onto a large wooden deck. A breeze blew around them keeping the air from getting too warm. There was a glass patio table complete with a yellow and orange stripped umbrella. Sitting at the table was Mark.

"Mr. Kilgore?" Roy approached the man cautiously. Mark looked up at them as Johnny put the trauma box on the table.

"My foot," he said.

Roy looked down to the man's feet seeing that one foot was shoeless and swollen. "What happened to your foot?" Roy asked.

"I wanted to go bowling. She didn't." He paused as Roy touched his foot, assessing it. Roy was concerned by the lack of pain response he would have expected.

Johnny could only imagine with them, "Did you drop the bowling ball on your foot?"

"She did."

"Well, I think it's broken." Roy looked at Johnny. Each wondering if they would actually get one of them to go to the hospital. "It needs x-rays, you're gonna have to go to the ER this time."

"No, no hospital."

They couldn't believe it. Johnny stood up, waving his hand in the air. "Look, your foot might be broken there and you need to have it seen."

"No." It was simple to him. Johnny was speechless. He wanted to yell at the man, then quit calling us if you're not going to do anything about it!

Roy also tried but after dealing with them all day he didn't have it in him to argue into the night over it. He pulled out the refusal form and had him sign it.

Johnny looked around the yard to find it was surprisingly large with some nice trees in the back yard. Looking up one of the larger trees he found a great tree house. It was huge but looked old and no longer kept up. Then as he scanned back across to Roy his eyes were drawn to the second floor window. As he realized the window was open he also saw that Mrs. Kilgore was looking down at them. And she was holding something. What was she holding?

Before Johnny could take another breath something was falling from the window. Something large and black. Vince was standing by the edge of the deck when he saw Johnny looking up.

"Here's your ball," she called down from the window. Mark looked up and reached out with his arms to catch the object that was plummeting towards him.

Johnny watched it come down as he instinctively moved towards Roy. He saw that the man was ready to catch what was falling but Johnny was filled with an all powerful dread for him and his friend's safety. With both arms out he yelled at his partner as the bowling ball hit the table.

Roy looked up from the signed form when he heard Johnny's yell then saw him heading right for him. Johnny came crashing down on Roy pushing him backwards, shielding his body from the flying shards of glass as the ball impacted with the table. They landed with an ummph and Roy grunted as the breath was knocked out of him. Suddenly he realized that he was flat on his back with Johnny on top of him. "What…?" he said looking at Johnny.

"Careful Johnny, there's glass everywhere," Vince said as Johnny regained his footing and stood back up.

A rapid assessment of his friend showed that Roy had no glass on him. Johnny then looked over to the husband. Mark was down on the ground beside the deck, spilled over in his chair when he decided he couldn't catch the ball.

"Johnny!"

Johnny turned to see a flash of panic across Roy's face, "What?"

Roy moved over to him and took his arm, "Be still for a minute will ya." Roy took his arm and showed him the glass shard in his left arm. Johnny had been so worried about everyone else he didn't even realize it was there. Roy sat Johnny down then went to check on Mark.

"Mr. Kilgore are you ok?" He asked as he offered a hand for him to get up. Surprisingly the man took Roy's hand and pulled himself up.

"I think so."

Roy checked him over but only found a few minor cuts and scratches. After he cleaned them up he turned his attention back to Johnny again.

"What did you go and do that for?" Roy asked.

"Do what?" Johnny asked innocently.

"You know exactly what I mean." Roy smiled.

"Well, Joanne would have my head if you got hurt again today." He shot Roy a crooked smile.

"Ok, Junior. Let's get you to Rampart. Again."


Roy walked down the hallway towards the nursing desk. Dixie came out of room 2 and almost ran right into him.

"Hey Roy, what are you doing here?"

"Need some supplies and have another little problem." Roy smiled at Dixie's perplexed look.

She froze, "Uh, where's Johnny?"

She followed Roy's line of site down the hallway to see Johnny, very slowly, coming around the corner towards them. Dixie got concerned because he looked pretty whipped after the course of this day. When he got close enough she saw the bandage wrapped around his left arm.

"Johnny, something you want to share with the class?" She kidded but she was genuinely concerned.

"Well, just a little cut is all." He had trouble meeting her eyes this time. He felt like the naughty child who was being repeatedly sent to the principles office.

"Oh come on, we'll get you taken care of." She led him into treatment room 3 with Roy trailing right behind them.

Brackett came in as Dixie was undoing the bandage. He also was concerned, Johnny had been in the ER way to much today and it looked like it was taking its toll on him. "What happened now?"

"Just got caught in a little glass storm," Johnny tried to make it sound ok seeing everyone's concerned looks around him.

"Glass storm huh? Let's take a look at it." Brackett found a two inch piece of glass embedded in his forearm. "Well, doesn't look to bad but will need some stitches."

Roy patted Johnny on the shoulder, "I'm gonna call Cap, he's gonna want to know about this."

Brackett looked up at Roy a little surprised, "You're calling in a cut?"

Roy turned around and chuckled, "Well, Cap's a little worried about the repeated trips to the ER today for us. I promised I would call anything else in to him." He headed out the door.

Brackett went back to Johnny's arm, cleaning it, removing the glass, then putting in some stitches.

Dixie came in with Roy, followed by Joe. They all looked at Johnny.

"Don't say anything," he begged.

"Is this all from the same house?" Joe asked.

Johnny hung his head down, "Yes."

"How is it that you keep winding up in the ER and not the person you rescued?" Joe continued to probe.

"I don't know doc, that place is jinxed for me." Johnny looked up to see Roy come back into the room.

"Uh huh." He nodded his head. "These are real people right?"

Dixie giggled and Kelly had to swallow his laugh.

Johnny jumped off the table, "Yes there real people! Roy?" He looked at this partner for help.

Roy decided to rescue his partner, "Believe it not Doc, they are real. Johnny actually got hurt this time trying to keep the glass off of me."

Johnny beamed.

Joe smiled, "Ok, just wanted to make sure this wasn't a delusion from your head injuries today. We can do a CT scan if needed."

Johnny left the room mumbling, "Delusion, I'm not the crazy married person who keeps calling the fire department…………..."