Queen Luana : Well what do you know, an almost immediate update !

Several readers: (audible gasp)

SS Jentl: Like I said, we're not dead.

Queen Luana: And here we go again!


Irish drinking song

"Yes, we are back!" Queen Luana smiles broadly now with combed hair and decent clothing. "It is almost twelve o' clock but we will continue! I've got cola! Cola cola cola!"

"Oh, yes, by the way," SS Jentl says and reads from a card, "we've had a request of someone wanting to be picked out of the audience. We took the liberty of sending him a new ticket since the old one expired about two centuries ago. We've given our cast a dictionary, but so far they haven't found a word rhyming with 1wngdngl yet, but as soon as they do, we'll let you know."

"Actually I think it stands for one winged angel," Selphie hints.

Queen Luana buzzes. "You don't speak unless it's funny, stupid, hyperactive or extremely adorable," she snaps.

Selphie shrinks and continues scanning her dictionary.

"In the meantime," SS Jentl continues, "we'll move on to a game called Irish drinking song, also a request. And guess what." She throws a meaningful look at Paine. "Since some of us still haven't done a darn thing on this show, they'll be forced to now since our members have to sing a song one line at a time."

Paine snorts. "Fine."

"It talks," Queen Luana gasps and takes the card from SS Jentl. "Very well then all of you, step up. We will give you a topic which we have given lots of thought."

"Now you didn't," Kairi says. "I saw you writing it down five seconds ago." Queen Luana throws away her pen and hits 1wngdngl in the eye.

"Whoops, sorry there," she appologises. "Better find a word that rhymes before we get sued." She clears her troat. "Anyhow. Let's begin and the topic is: fell of a chocobo. That should do it. Hey, now it's your problem. Take it away, we've kidnapped Rain from the Deling City bar to play the theme."

Rain sweatdrops and starts playing when the cast open their mouths in a lood 'oooh'.

"I got myself a chocobo," sings Wakka.

"She was very small," Kairi tunes in.

"She was very yellow," Selphie sings.

"She wasn't very tall," Paine mutters.

"I'll love her like no other."

"I swear I'll love her most," Kairi says then raises an eyebrow and mutters: "Is that a correct sentence?"

"Because she is so fluffy," Selphie smiles.

"I want to kill the host," Paine finishes and Queen Luana runs and hides behind Sky Bolt.

"I called her lil' sunshine," Kairi continues the song.

"And took her for a walk."

"I gave her lots of things to eat."

"I even learned her talk."

"I never saw it coming," Kairi says and raises an eyebrow at Wakka.

"But then she said to me."

"Hey girl, guess what."

"I really gotta pee!"

SS Jentl shakes her head sadly seeing how the song is getting off track.

"She started running faster," Selphie sings ever so brightly.

"She went on and on."

"Until I fell off her back."

"I know a boy named Ron," Kairi says, clueless.

"I landed on my bum," Selphie giggles.

"I landed on my back."

"And then I landed on my head."

"And a guy named Zack!" Kairi sings proudly.

"Only one more verse," SS Jentl reassures the audience.

"Thank God it's almost over," Paine sighes.

"My chocobo is gone."

"Are we getting payed for this?"

"Hey, we're almost done."

Both the hosts swallow.

"They didn't take my weapons."

"They didn't take my ball."

"Let's go kick their ass now."

"They ran off to the hall!"

While Rain ends the song now a little more cheerfully the four improvisers run past the audience into the hall.


SS Jentl and Queen Luana appear behind the table again, panting and clothes torn. "Yeah, so uh," SS Jentl pants, "what a great Irish drinking song that was."

"I liked the pee part," Queen Luana says quietly. "How about we now go over to another quiet little game of Scenes from a Hat."

Loud cheers from the audience.

"Okay, but I want to get lots of points for this," Paine says.

"Sure, whatever," SS Jentl says. "They don't matter. Have a million of them!"

Queen Luana draws a strip. "Okay, let's see here. What Squall really means when he says 'whatever'. Well, that should be interesting."

Selphie skips forward and looks at the audience with puppy eyes. "Hug me." BUZZ!

Kairi waves from one side to another. "Kumbaya, my lord, kumbaya…" BUZZ!

Wakka looks up and puts his hans in his pockets. "Uhm, let's see. Two large cheese pizzas with everything on it." BUZZ!

"Yes, pizza people do know what you want," Queen Luana says and draws the next strip. "Bad spells."

Selphie makes a serene hand motion. "Laxative." BUZZ! But she runs back up. "Laxatega." BUZZ!

"Ugh, the mental images!" SS Jentl cries.

Wakka steps up as well. "Richard Simmonsga!" BUZZ!

"Next!" SS Jentl exclaims loudly and pulls a strip from the hat. "What Squall really thinks of Rinoa," she reads and flips the paper over. "Man, Squall sure is the popular one these days huh."

Bunch of drooling Squall fans nod. Queen Luana grabs the mop. "I got it."

Kairi smiles widely. "You're like a big sister to me!" BUZZ!

Wakka walks up and smirks. "Prroaw…" BUZZ!

"Yoh Rinoa," Paine says, "you lookin' mighty fiiine. Get that ass over here girl, uhu." Everyone stares at her with wide open eyes. "Well, I had to say something," she says. BUZZ!

Selphie steps up and drools. BUZZ!

"Okay, that's it for today everyone," Queen Luana smiles. "We'll be back soon enough with some new people. But for tonight the winner is Wakka for holding up with all these girls."

Wakka nods.

"And the others may read the credits for you as if they really need to pee. Goodnight."

Everyone grabs for their crotch. "Aw, man… Dan Patterson…" Kairi twitches.

"Gimme Tom Park, nooow!" Selphie cries.

Paine is crouching behind the table. "Hellooo? We're out of Mark Leveson!"


Queen Luana: There, I feel as if I'm keeping my promises. Late, but I'm keeping them.

SS Jentl: To think that those four have been kamping in your kitchen for over a year now.

Queen Luana: Yeah, wonder how they managed to survive with my dad's nightly promenades to the fridge. But anyway people, you know the drill. Don't make me say it. Please, don't make me beg. Wait. I already did.