Disclaimer: I don't own.
Author's Note: I was going to wait to update, but decided not to. If I wait, I'll just get lazy. :) I hope you enjoy this chapter! I'm thinking about three more chapters. Yes, I said that about three chapters ago. :) Please review! And a HUGE thank you to those who are reading, a HUGER thank you to those who are reading and reviewing. I hope you guys realize how much reviews mean to authors, and how grateful I am for them. :)
Warning: Language and a slap. :)
For Her Sake
Chapter 22 - A Shot of Courage
Don't Lie to Me
Hyde didn't say anything as Jackie walked over to the bed and sat down, her arms still crossed, her eyes narrow and focused on him. He sighed, and went to her. He sat down, staring at the hand gripping her elbow. "So." Hesitantly, he put his hand on her thigh, and took another breath when she didn't squirm away from his touch. "Okay. I did fake my death." He smirked. "But you already know that."
Jackie glared at him. "Stop trying to be cute, Steven." She studied his face. He looked older, more jaded than he'd even been before. Even his smile seemed more guarded, less genuine. His head bowed, and she licked her lips nervously. Something was burdening him; something big. She uncrossed her arms and put her right hand on top of his resting on her thigh. "Steven." Her voice gentled. "Please tell me."
He turned his hand over, and her tiny fingers wrapped around it. He couldn't look at her. Not when he told her this. And so he stared at the floor. White carpet. Jackie loved white carpet. Like snow, she'd always said, except not wet and not messy and not cold. "I didn't want to leave, Jackie. I didn't have a choice. He…your…someone forced me to." His heart clenched. And his mind worked overtime. Couldn't he tell her something else? Anything but that her father threatened to kill her?
He looked at her, her wide eyes, the innocence that still resided in her despite all she'd been through. She had such a light to her, a radiance that exuded from her eyes, her smile, her skin, all of her. And part of that light was her belief that her parents, contrary to their actions, somewhere down deep, loved her. That she was still their precious little girl.
"Who? And why, Steven? Why would someone force you to pretend to be dead?"
He looked away, closed his eyes, tightened his hold on her hand. "Your father."
Jackie's breath caught in her throat. "What?" Maybe he hadn't said what she thought he had. "Wait, did you just say my father?" She began to giggle. "Why would my father force you to pretend you were dead?"
Hyde pulled his hand out of hers and stood up. He walked over to the bassinet and gazed down at Stephanie. She was awake, and when her eyes met his, she smiled. He did too, faintly, and he put his index finger in a tiny palm. Her fingers curled around it and held tight. Her eyes were huge, and full of the trust every little girl should have in her father, the love and need and dependence. Jackie must have looked at Jack that same way when she was this small. Hadn't that meant anything to him? Hadn't it made him feel all loopy inside the way Hyde felt right now?
Anger boiled in his stomach. Jackie should know the truth. Even if it broke her heart. She had to know. Had to understand. And then somehow, he'd have to make her feel better, lord knows how he'd do that.
He reluctantly tugged his finger from his daughter's hold and turned. Took a deep breath, and wished he had a shot of tequila. A shot of courage, the Eagles called it. "Because he hates me. Because he didn't want us to be together."
Jackie rolled her eyes and stood up. "But why did you go along with it, Steven? Did you really care what he thought? He was hardly in my life…we could have handled it."
"He told me if I didn't make you think I was dead, he'd kill you."
For a moment, time seemed to stop, and Jackie couldn't move. But the moment was slight, and she began to laugh bitterly. Of all the excuses Steven could have come up with, this was the best one? This was the one that made the most sense to him? This was the garbage he expected her to buy? "My father said he'd kill me," she said between chuckles. "You're telling me that my father said he'd…kill me." And then she got mad. Her face flushed, her laughter stopped. She stalked over to Steven, reached up and served a slap to his face, as hard as she could. "Don't lie to me, Steven!"
Hyde rubbed his stinging cheek and leveled a nasty glare at the girl in front of him, her eyes now swollen with anger and hurt. "What the hell, Jackie?" Damn, that chick had power in her miniature hands! He hadn't imagined this. Hadn't imagined that she wouldn't believe him. Clearly an oversight on his part. "I'm not lying, Jackie, and if you'll just shut the hell up and let me explain…"
Jackie held up a hand and turned from him, stalking to the window. She pushed aside the thick, velvet curtains and stared outside. She gazed upon a huge lawn of lush grass, bordered on each side by trees that stretched to the sky. At the end, a slender road, what must be a driveway, cut off the grass. It curved when it reached the trees, and she guessed it continued on the other side up to the house. Must be a mansion. Her eyes closed, her fingers released the curtains. "Well, you better come up with a better explanation than that, Steven." He said nothing, and she turned, her chest shuddering.
"What's the matter? Can't think of anything? Can't come up with a more believable reason?"
Hyde clenched his fists. Should have known better. Should have known that she'd act this way, like the spoiled little princess her bastard of a father had raised her to be. "No, because what I just told you is the fucking truth!" He crossed his arms, the heat of anger rushing the hint of sweat to his forehead. Took a deep breath, tried to find composure. Tried to remind himself how hard this was for her to hear. "Look, I went to your father after we had all that sex. I wanted to get him to accept that you and I were gonna be together. He told me in no uncertain terms that he'd rather see you dead than with me."
She threw her hands up, then stomped over to him. Staring defiantly up into the blazing blue eyes she'd dreamed of nearly every night, she took a handful of his tee shirt and gripped it in a tight fist. "Listen to me, Steven. You left me. You gave me the night of my dreams, you made me fall in love with you all over again, and then you left. You let me think you were dead. You let me cry every single day." Her voice began to rise, her breathing sharpened and burned her lungs. "You let me live every day wanting to die because I'd lost you. You let me have our baby without you! And now you come back and tell me you let all that happen because my father threatened to kill me? My father loves me! He would never hurt me, let alone…" Tears began to fall from her eyes, streaking down her cheeks as quickly as the words lashed from her lips. "God, Steven, if you had changed your mind and didn't want to be with me, you could have just told me! Believe it or not, I would have lived!"
The baby began to cry, a soft mewing that quickly escalated into a loud wail. Jackie let go of Steven's shirt, giving him a tiny push as she did so, and went to her child. She picked Stephanie up, settled her on her shoulder and began to lightly bounce her, rubbing her back in soft circles. "Its okay, pumpkin. Its okay. Mommy's sorry. She didn't mean to yell. Its okay, sweetie. Shhh."
Hyde stood stiffly, his pride rearing, mixing with the anger and leaving him cold. Of course she thought that of him. Nothing he'd done that night…nothing he'd said, nothing had mattered, because she still believed that he didn't really want her. Bitterness settled in, reeling him backwards to old patterns, old habits, old defensiveness. "So. You don't believe me. You think I'm lying to you." He spoke slowly, icily. Staring her down and hardly seeing the baby she held in her arms.
She still didn't know. He'd done all that crap…she still didn't know. Fuck, what in the hell was ever going to be enough for her?
Jackie smirked. "You've done it before. You told me you loved me then ran off and married a whore."
He closed his eyes. Some voice in the back of his head was screaming. Tell her! Tell her the truth about Vegas! How the hell do you expect her to understand without telling her that? But another voice, a louder, much more familiar voice, one much more like his own, drowned common sense out. It doesn't matter what you tell her. She's not going to believe you. If it doesn't match with her pretty and pink view of the world, she's not going to believe you. He opened his eyes, but looked down at the ground, his limbs suddenly heavy with exhaustion. So much anticipation…and now this. "Fine. Don't believe me." He shook his head, scuffed his feet on the floor. Defeated. First by fucking Jack Burkhart, now by his daughter.
The anger returned. He snapped his head up. "You know what? I don't give a damn. If you don't want to know the truth, fine by me." He walked to the door, digging in his pocket for the key Sammy had given him.
Jackie watched him leave, her tears coming faster, Stephie's bawling growing louder. She screamed, unable to control the swirling emotion in her throat. "Steven, don't walk away from me! Tell me what the hell happened! Steven! STEVEN!"
The door slammed behind him, and Jackie, clutching Stephanie, sank to the floor, her body giving out, falling prey to wracking sobs.
Just Wait Here
Hyde brushed past Sammy, intending on going…well, who the hell knew where. Somewhere where the was beer, preferably, and a hell of a lot of it.
"Whoa, Hyde, where you goin'? I thought you were telling Jackie what happened." Sammy caught him by the arm and turned Hyde to him, giving him a deep frown. Hyde tried to shake out of his grasp, but Sammy didn't let go. Nope. Wasn't gonna let this guy run the way Sammy knew he was tempted to. "Stop it," he growled as the young man kept struggling. He tightened his grip. "Stop it!"
Hyde stopped struggling. Pointless, anyway. Sammy was huge, had nearly six inches on him, and he was strong. And, he figured, he didn't really want to fight anyway. He wanted to get drunk. He made a face. "Yeah, well, she doesn't wanna hear it. And you know what? I don't care. I must have forgotten what a bitch she is." He looked away, unable to bear the look he knew was coming, the look he'd been so familiar with his entire life. Fucking disappointment. His eyes closed and he gasped when Sammy gave him a good, hard, shake, jostling his brain and his eyeballs. He winced. Damn it! The way things were going, he was going to get a serious beating between Sammy and Jackie.
"Now, just wait a minute, Hyde. You ain't got no right to talk about her that way. She had your baby! And she's been pinin' for you since the day you left. Don't be calling her that name, or any other name!" Sammy took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. "Now. Did you really expect her to just accept that her father was gonna kill her? C'mon, boy." He took one hand off the kid's shoulders and smacked him with decent force on the back of his head. "You know that ain't gonna happen."
Hyde sighed, the exhaustion now reaching his mind. He hung his head, thinking of all the times Jackie had talked about her father with such love and pride in her eyes. And the times she'd tried to hide the tears when he'd let her down. And of course, the love that always, no matter what she was saying, accompanied her words about her daddy. Something in his chest seemed to snap, and his shoulders slumped. He knew she'd suffered. He knew. Sammy had told him. All those times at the cemetery, crying and sometimes screaming. God, kitten, if you only knew…It was hell for me too. "I know, I know." He could hardly hear his own words. "I get that it's hard for her to hear. Believe me, I get it. I just…I mean, she thinks I didn't…I don't know how to make her believe me."
Sammy nodded, and this time, patted Hyde with much more gentleness. "You just let ole Sammy talk to her for a few minutes. You tell her about Vegas?"
"Didn't get a chance to."
Sammy rolled his eyes. "Well, there's your first problem. You shoulda started with it. Never mind. I will. Just wait here." He gave Hyde another pat on the head, and turned to the door.
He Ain't Such a Good Man
Sammy cocked his head, his chest aching, when he entered the room and found his pretty girl sitting on the floor, holding her tiny baby and rocking, crying so hard he feared she'd drown. "Oh, pretty girl," he sighed sadly, taking a few tentative steps towards her.
Jackie looked up, hardly seeing through the tears. "He's lying to me, Sammy. Why is he lying to me? Why is he telling me that he left because my father…my father…My father…I mean, I know he's never been the best father in the world, but he would never threaten to kill me!"
"He ain't lying to you, pretty girl." Sammy closed his eyes and crouched down beside the two little girls. "He ain't lying."
"What?"
He took a deep breath, struggling with the guilt. This tiny, precious, beautiful girl, the one who should be the joy of Jack Burkhart's life but wasn't, was looking at him with such fear. He had her heart, or at least part of it, in his hands, and he was going to have to shatter that part. "Your father…well, he ain't such a good man, Jackie. And…He did tell Hyde that he would kill you if Hyde had anything to do with you. Twice. I know, because…well, because I was in on it." He sat down, looking away from the huge eyes gazing at him, all glassy and watery. He traced a random pattern on the carpeting, watching his finger move. "I'm real sorry about that, but the truth's the truth." He closed his eyes. What was that Hyde had been mumbling about before he and Carl had gone to get Jackie and the baby? Something about a shot of courage? He could use one right now. Opening his eyes, he looked at Jackie and did his best to smile. "I got a long story to tell you."
Have to Tell Him
"Okay, it's been four hours. No one's seen her. Kelso and Fez haven't found her." Donna shook her head, her stomach twisted. "What do we do now?"
The reception had just about come to an end, and only a few stragglers remained in the ballroom. The gang, plus Red, Kitty, Bob and Midge, stood in the middle of the dance floor in a circle.
Eric sighed. His hopes for a hot, sex-filled wedding night had been dashed, and he was doing his best not to blame Jackie for it. Though he could easily imagine that she'd done this on purpose, just to keep Donna from committing the "crime" of sleeping with him. She was the devil, after all. "I guess we better call the police."
Kelso frowned. "They won't do anything. Can't do anything about a missing adult until they've been missing for 24 hours."
Donna glared at him. "But there's a baby, too, doesn't that make a difference?"
Red cleared his throat. "Okay, look. I'm not even sure we can file a missing persons report on her. We're not related to her." He raised his eyebrows. "I think we better call Jack."
The group groaned. "But Jackie hasn't talked to her dad in months," Fez pointed out. "She told me that she hates him."
Donna shook her head furiously, the twist in her stomach growing worse. The last thing Jackie would want would be for her father to know that she was missing. After what her father had done before the baby was born…there was no way in hell Jackie would want him to rescue her. "No. We can't tell him. Besides, it's not like he'd really give a damn."
Kitty sighed. "I don't think we have a choice here, sweetie. We have to tell him. Now." She looked at her loved ones gathered around her. "Who's going to call Jack?"
No one answered.
