Hey all! So sorry it took me so long to update, I promise to be better at it in the future!
REFUSAL
I sat at the Cullens useless kitchen table shaking my head over and over and over just to get the point across. I wasn't going. They couldn't make me. Edward kept giving me a frustrated look, but I just ignored it. I was not leaving Charlie, not if I had no reason to leave. A point I had verbally expressed.
"No reason?" Edward yelled, "Isn't a group of murderous vampires who have their eyes set on killing you a big enough 'reason'"
"Edward, quit, you're making everyone nervous." Jasper said, "Everyone other than Bella."
Jasper was right, I wasn't nervous; I was infuriated to my full capacity. I wouldn't leave unless he changed me, which was the only excuse for leaving Charlie and Renee behind.
"Bella, dear, please listen to what we are saying." Esme tried to convince me that this was for my own good.
"I'm listening, but I'm not going." I said, "I'm sorry."
I got up out of my chair and walked out the door, no one tried to stop me, which was a big surprise. I got into my car and started the engine. I suddenly felt good, better than I had in a while. I had control, total control. They just didn't know it yet.
"You're being ridiculous." I made a weird scream-slash-grunt sound as I hit the driver side door.
Edward's silhouette was now completely clear in the milky moonlight. His face was sad and slightly resigned. My heart began to ache. I was being selfish again. Stupid and selfish.
"You're not being selfish. Stupid maybe, but not selfish."
Oh, I had forgotten. Suddenly Edward knew exactly what I was thinking all the time. I hated it so much. I couldn't hide from him, no longer was my mind a sacred place.
"Edward…please." I began to cry quietly, wishing with all of my heart that Volterra would disappear; from our memory and from existence completely. I could be content then; we could live happily, not bothering anybody.
"Bella….I…" Edward's head snapped up, "Bella, get out of the car slowly and walk into the house." I went to ask why, but he gave me a meaningful glance. "Just keep walking, don't look back, I will follow you."
I don't know about anyone else, but when my vampire boyfriend looks terrified, as he did at the moment, I feel kind of insecure. I opened the door and stepped lightly onto the gravel. This wasn't going to be easy. I could feel whatever it was that Edward had looked so worried about, it was watching me, gauging my reaction to its obvious presence. This was not a good moment; in fact it was probably one of the worst moments of my life right after the moment when Edward told me he didn't love me anymore.
I could see Alice standing at the front door, eyes wide and just as terrified as her brother's had been a moment before. She seemed to be trying to hide it; the rest of her face was tight and masked.
"Come on Bella." She said quietly.
I was shaking so hard it was as if an earthquake was beneath my feet. I felt closer to death than I had ever felt before. Maybe it was because death had found its own physical form and now it was hunting me.
