Turning Saints Into the Sea
Chapter Seven: Bimbos and Awapuhi Shampoo
Melanie stood in front of the mirror, brushing her long, black hair.
Maybe I should get it cut.
"Samantha! Wake up!" she called to Sam's sleeping form, who was curled up on the bed. She mumbled something unintelligible and rolled over.
"C'mon, Sam," Mel said, buttoning up her shirt. "Get moving!"
Sam sat up, rubbing her eyes slowly. "What time is it?" she asked sleepily.
"It's around four," Shannon Nevan said, coming out of the bathroom while applying cover up.
Sam groaned. "But it's Saturday! Why do I have to get up?"
Mel sat on her bed, still brushing her hair. "Because The Three Broomsticks dance thing is today, and you said you'd meet Remus at seven."
Looking at her clock, Sam realized that indeed it was four. Springing up, she dashed into the bathroom, where Erin Nevan and Rhea Sofronio were giggling and braiding each other's hair.
"Get out, get out!" Sam shrieked, frantically searching around for shampoo and conditioner.
"Shannon, do you have that awphoee stuff?" she called, digging through bags.
"Awapuhi?" Shannon asked slyly.
"Yeah," Sam said, coming to the door. "Can I borrow it?"
Shannon looked at Rhea for a second. "Awapuhi shampoo isn't something you cavalierly use, Samantha. We'll need to give you some sort of instruction."
"Whatever," Sam said frantically. "I have like, three hours till Remus picks me up and I haven't even eaten anything!"
"Tell you what," Rhea said sweetly. "I'll pick out your clothes, Melanie will get your food, and Erin and Shannon can help you get ready."
"No," Mel said. "I need to be here if you're going to do anything to Sam."
"Fine," Rhea sighed. "Erin, go get some orange juice and some egg whites, no butter."
"'Egg whites, no butter'?!" Sam cried as Erin nodded and slid outside. "I need more than that, I'm starving!"
"You can't eat much before you dance, you'll get cramps," Shannon said dismissively. "Strip."
"What?" Sam asked, sure she hadn't heard Shannon correctly.
"You heard me. Strip!"
"I am not stripping in front of you!" Sam cried indignantly, crossing her arms in front of her chest.
Shannon rolled her eyes. "Fine. Get in the shower and we'll hand you stuff."
Sam walked into the shower, firmly locked the door, turned on the water, and called, "Okay, you can come in now!"
A faint, "Alohomora!" and a click sounded and Shannon was in the room. "Here's the shampoo," she said, handing Sam a small purple bottle. "Use a couple dollops."
After pouring the shampoo into her hand, Sam handed the bottle back to Shannon, who quickly gave her another one. "Body wash."
"Wait! I'm not done with the shampoo!" Sam cried, massaging her hair.
"Well, hurry up! We don't have all day," Shannon replied curtly.
"Leave her alone, Shannon," Melanie said.
"Mel? You there?" Sam asked, gagging on a large amount of bubbles.
"Yeah, I'm here," Melanie yelled over the sound of the water. "How are you do-"
"Are you done with the shampoo, Samantha?" Shannon interrupted, shoving the body wash into Sam's hand.
"I guess so."
"Good. Here's a washcloth, rub this everywhere except your face," Shannon instructed as Sam clumsily washed herself.
"Done?" Shannon called.
"Yep," Sam said, handing back the bottle. Her skin felt raw from scrubbing.
"Here's some conditioner. Rinse and repeat," Shannon said, shoving another bottle at her.
Sam sighed. It was going to be a long day.
Two hours later, Sam was pacing her room in a bra and jeans, trying to think of what shirt to wear, while Melanie lay on the bed, using the ink spell to draw smiley faces on the ceiling.
"Clean that up, Melanie," Sam commanded. "I have like, half and hour before I go on my date and I'm not sure what I'm going to wear.
"Scourgify," Melanie muttered, wiping the ceiling clean. "You have no one to blame but yourself for chasing out Rhea, Shannon, and Erin with that bedpost."
"They wanted to give me a bikini wax!" Sam shrieked, cracking. "I'm sorry, but I don't want those three poking anything near my-"
"Okay, okay, I get it," Melanie laughed. "What are your options shirt-wise?"
Taking a deep breath, Sam went over to her trunk and pulled out a black shirt. "I was thinking of wearing this, or," she said, rummaging in the trunk again, "This." She held up a blue cardigan.
"Try them both on," Mel said, glad Sam wasn't in hysterics anymore.
Obligingly, Sam headed into the bathroom. A few moments later, she came out again in the black shirt.
"Tada," she trilled, twirling around to model the shirt. It was long and clinging, and Melanie had to admit it made Sam look curvier than she already was.
"That shirt looks really good-" Mel started, before she realized who Sam was going to be with when wearing the shirt.
"Are you sure it's appropriate?" Melanie asked. "I don't think you want to come off too strong."
"What's wrong with it?" Sam asked, observing her hips in the mirror. "It's not like its midriff bearing."
"Yeah, but I'm not sure the amount of cleavage you're showing is necessary."
Sam stared at Melanie. "I'm hardly showing any cleavage. And it's not like I have that much to begin with. Unlike you or Lily," she added enviously, before slapping a hand to her mouth. "Oh my God! Lily! We were supposed to meet her after her rounds!" Grabbing her coat, she dashed out the door, before hurrying back in to grab her makeup bag. "Mel! C'mon!" she called.
Standing up, Mel surveyed herself in the mirror. Her hair hung like a cape around her. A boring cape.
Quickly digging up her spell book, she quickly scanned the pages for the color spell.
"Gotcha," she whispered, pulling out her wand.
Taking a deep breath, she pointed it at the tips of her hair and said, "Flammeum!"
Lily Evans casually walked around the Hogsmeade streets, window shopping. Where in the world are they?! she wondered, as she pondered buying a large bar of Dangerously Dark Chocolate in the window of Honeydukes.
"Lily! LILY!"
Turning around, she saw a figure with a large amount of golden blonde hair running towards her; Sam. A couple hundred yards behind her was Melanie, also sprinting.
"I'm so sorry we're late!" Sam gasped as Melanie caught up to them, wheezing.
"It's okay. Oh my God! Mel! Your hair!" Lily cried.
Mel grinned. About two centimeters at the very bottom of her hair was a bright red. "Like it?" she sang. "I decided to try something new for tonight."
Sam laughed. "It's really cool! But when did you do it? We left together."
"Being 5'9" has its advantages," Mel said, indicating to her long legs. "I looked it up right after you took off."
Sam shrugged. "Whatever." She then noticed the bag in her hands. "Oh yeah! Lily, I need help with makeup."
Smiling, Lily grabbed her friends and led them into the nearest shop's toilet, all the way whispering, "You will not believe what Potter did last night!"
"Prongs!"
BANG!
James Potter sat up from his bed. "What is it?!" he yelled, feeling around for his glasses and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.
As his vision cleared, he realized he was staring into the grey eyes of Sirius Black.
Groaning, James tore off his glasses and rolled back onto his bed.
"C'mon, Potter! Up, up, up!" Sirius chanted, pounding James on the back.
Grumbling, James swung his feet around and placed them on the floor. "Why did you get me up so early?"
Remus laughed. "Early? It's six thirty in the evening."
The watch on James's wrist confirmed Remus's statement. "I was up late last night. I had rounds," he mumbled.
"With the lovely Miss Evans?" Sirius crowed, sitting on the bed. "What happened?"
Thinking over what had happened the night before, James moaned and smacked himself in the head with his palm.
"What?" Sirius asked, suddenly serious.
"I almost snogged her," James admitted quietly.
A stunned silence followed James's words. "What?" Peter asked slowly.
James looked up guiltily. "She was talking about how I would never compare to this Muggle she snogged and I said 'There's only one way to find that out,' and I grabbed her and then two second years ran by so we had to stop. Oh my God, what would have happened if they hadn't been there?" He fell back onto his bed.
"Wow," Sirius said.
"'Wow' is right," James growled.
"Did she try to stop you?" Peter asked timidly.
James sat up, not having considered this. "No, I guess she didn't," he concluded slowly. "But after we yelled at the second years I told Lily that I would never cheat on Hernandez with her." He fingered the quilt, half talking to himself. "Why I said that I don't know . . ."
"Because you needed to be a good role model," Remus said, sitting down on a stool. "Is there any way Lily could have taken it differently? Like, could she have thought you were doing something other than attempt to kiss her?"
James laughed bitterly. "I pressed her up against the wall and leaned in pretty damn close. Someone would have to be a complete idiot to interpret that any other way."
"Pressing someone up against a wall and leaning in is a sign of kissing?" Peter suddenly cried.
The other three Marauders stared at him. "Yeah . . . what did you think it was?" Sirius asked slowly.
Peter started blushing. "Well, I do that all the time to people, and I never fully realized why they started freaking out," he whispered.
Silence.
"Just kidding!" he stammered, far too late.
"Good," Sirius laughed. "I thought you were serious for a second there."
Giggling oddly, Peter exited, muttering something about eating food.
"Remind me why we hang out with him again?" Sirius asked vaguely, looking at the ceiling.
"Because he's our friend," Remus said tiredly.
"Oh yeah," Sirius answered, apparently fascinated by James's walls.
"Why are you staring at my ceiling?" James asked, snapping his fingers in front of Sirius's face.
Sirius shrugged. "I dunno. Wasn't it a different color before?"
"No . . ."
"Before?" Remus sat up. "When were you in here before?"
"I was visiting James to talk about . . ." Sirius trailed off, racking his brain for an excuse. "About girls."
Remus stared, openmouthed. "Girls?! Since when do you need advice on girls?"
Sirius shrugged moodily. "Apparently I'm not as wonderful as I thought I was. I got turned down yesterday."
Remus fell off the chair in shock. "That's the first time ever!" He then thought for a moment. "No, there was that one time in the third year with Misae Chen-"
"Alright, alright, we know," Sirius interrupted angrily.
"Who were you rejected by?" Remus asked, sitting back on his stool.
"Melanie Owen."
He fell off again. "Melanie Owen?!"
"Yeah. Is that bad or something?" Sirius asked.
"Since when do you like Melanie Owen?" Remus said in an oddly calm voice.
"Since yesterday morning," Sirius informed, picking lint off his socks. "We have to go. You have your hot date with Sam," he said to Remus, smiling evilly.
Remus blushed slightly. "Yeah, we should get going."
Sam entered the Three Broomsticks hesitantly. She wasn't used to looking like a slag.
"For the last time, you do not look like a slag!" Lily said, rolling her eyes. "You look hot!"
Sam laughed nervously. "Yeah, right." She scanned the room. "Do you see Remus?"
"There!" Mel said, pointing to the table at which sat the four Marauders and Juliana Hernandez, who was clinging to Potter like a leech.
Taking a deep breath, Sam started across the room, tripping only twice on couples dancing.
As the trio approached the table, Remus saw them and hovered over a few chairs.
"Thanks," Sam said, sitting down next to Remus, who smiled shyly.
Lily observed Potter and Hernandez out of the corner of her eye. She watched in mild disgust as Hernandez fed him a cherry from her drink, which he took before throwing an arm around her shoulders and kissing her.
James, who seemed perfectly content with Juliana, was actually watching Lily's reaction to their obnoxious PDA. She looked adorably pissed, her auburn hair falling from its bun messily into her face, which she swatted away angrily. Just for good measure, he pulled Julie in closer, and much to his happiness, she snuggled in close to him. Lily looked away, crossing her arms and chewing her tongue.
"Can I get you anything?" Madam Rosmerta, the barmaid, asked the group.
Counting, Sirius answered with a wink, "Eight butterbeers, Rosmerta."
Blushing, the woman headed into the kitchen.
Mel, who was conveniently sitting next to Sirius, turned to him and grinned. "'Rosmerta?' You're on a first name basis with the barmaid?"
Sirius grinned, stretching his arms back. "Jealous, Owen?"
Melanie laughed. "Oh, yeah. The day you call me by my first name is the day my life will be completed."
He stared at her, totally serious. "I guess I'll call you 'Melanie' from now on then."
Before Melanie had a chance to answer, Madam Rosmerta came back. "Order's up," she said, handing out the eight butterbeers to the students. Melanie took an extra big gulp that burned her throat, but she didn't care.
Sam and Remus, on the other hand, were talking quietly between themselves, their heads only centimeters apart. They came out of their discussion when the butterbeers arrived.
"Melanie?" Remus asked suddenly.
Mel looked up and willed her face to stop blushing. "Yeah?" she asked, coughing on butterbeer.
"Did you do something to your hair?"
Melanie shrugged. "I dyed the bottom. The black was just getting to dark for me." She let her hair fall over her face like a curtain to hide her face. Through the strands, she watched Remus, who watched her intently before turning back to Sam, who was looking at them both oddly.
After a couple minutes of silence, Remus broke the ice by asking Sam if she wanted to dance.
"Sure," she smiled as he led her out to the floor.
Sirius at this point had pricked up to watch the two. Remus gently placed his hands on her waist as she put hers on his shoulders, and they begun to slowly sway to the music.
Melanie felt her stomach drop as she observed Remus and Sam. They looked so happy, so peaceful together. Their hair color was even similar.
"Prongs, look," Sirius suddenly said, turning to face the back corner of the room. James, who had been chatting flirtatiously with Julie, told her to wait a moment as he tried to see what Sirius was looking at.
"No way," he breathed. "Snivelly's got a girlfriend?!"
Melanie, Lily, and Juliana all turned to observe this shocking display.
"That's Hortensia Sharan!" Lily cried in disgust.
And indeed the unspeakable was true. In the far corner sat Severus Snape and Hortensia Sharan, in a passionate lip lock.
"My eyes!" laughed Sirius, smashing a hand over his face. "I'm scarred forever!"
"From what?" Juliana asked, clearly not getting the problem.
Sirius gave her a withering look. "From watching Snivellus stick his greasy tongue down the throat of someone other than Lucius Malfoy."
Juliana gasped. "Lucius Malfoy and Severus Snape were having a gay affair?" she shrieked, causing everyone to turn to see what she had said.
"Sirius is joking, Julie," James tenderly explained, tickling her.
Lily bit down extra hard on her tongue. Bimbo, she thought viciously.
