Disclaimer: The only bones that belong to me are the ones in my body. And even then, those don't have a capital 'B'.

Author's Notes: Okay, this is a little different from my usual B/B story. Yeah. The Cautionary Tale of Numero Cinco. Bet you guys never thought I'd be able to do that one. But then again, how many of you thought I wouldn't be able to do No Place Like Plrtz Glrb? I'm also considering tackling Slouching Towards Bethlehem. ;)

Anyway, Cam POV, in case you don't notice. XD


THE CAUTIONARY TALE OF NUMERO CINCO

I never thought it would be easy, but I didn't think it would be this hard. Working at the Jeffersonian, joining this team…seeing Seeley again for the first time since—well, you know. Maybe rekindling an old relationship. Plus, a having well-paying job in a high-tech lab. I thought it would be nice.

God, was I mistaken.

I'm number five. There's Brennan, Hodgins, Angela, Zach…and then there's me. Numero cinco. I thought I could just settle into life here, and I'd be accepted. Again, I was wrong.

The first, and most obvious, mistake I made was starting my relationship with Seeley again. It definitely didn't help me to become accepted—more like shunned. He wanted to keep our relationship a secret. I felt cheated, as if he was too embarrassed for people to know about us. I guess, in a way, he was right to do that, but everyone found out anyway.

The second mistake I made was actually thinking of it as a relationship. I kind of still do, although I know that's not good. It hurt me to realize that it was just sex. I…I really thought we could have become something. When I was in the hospital because of the poison, he was there with me. He cared, but not in the way he cares about Brennan. He didn't love. It was never love—it could never be.

And the third mistake I made was to get in their way. Not only in the way of Seeley and Dr. Brennan, but in the way of everyone in the lab. The relationships, the friendship that they all share. I learned my lesson when I asked Seeley what he would do if I decided to let Dr. Brennan go. His answer was clear. "I'm with Bones, all the way." And that's when I realized that the connections between everyone is this lab is stronger than any physical relationship I've had or could ever have with Seeley. So when Zach got his doctorate, there was nothing I could do but hire him.

So there it is. My cautionary tale. Numero cinco. The fifth member of the Jeffersonian team, not counting Seeley. Technically I'll always be a member of their team, but relationship-wise? I doubt it.


PLEASE revieweth! I beggeth you. XD

Also, I'm in need of a little help. I've received quite a few requests for Smile Time, and I'm definitely going to do it, but I can't seem to think up a plot for it. XD So if you have any ideas, PM me or revieweth! (Yeah, I know what you're thinking. I can think up a plot for The Cautionary Tale of Numero Cinco and There's No Place Like Plrtz Glrb but NOT Smile Time? XD I think my imagination's broke.

Let me try and think of the best thing ever. Um...beef...stew. Yep, it's busted all right.