Okay! I know it's been months….but there's this thing called College…and it takes up the majority of my time! Anyways, I'm back. Don't give up on me! I haven't yet…. Please read and review!
Edward was taking a walk. He was walking in the opposite direction of his house and his family, but he could still hear their thoughts. He could hear Rosalie telling his Isabella to go and put her life in the hands of a werewolf. To leave him. To leave her own husband. He could hear his own sister telling Isabella to leave him. He could hear Esme, his mother, resolve that Bella would leave, would make "the right decision". His brooding scowl deepened, and he knew that if his heart could still beat, its pulse would have quickened.
His pace broke effortlessly into a run. Running had always been soothing to Edward. They helped him clear his mind, and he usually quite enjoyed them. But not today. He knew that he was about to make a decision that would surely break him.
He could tell Bella was unhappy, he could tell that she would never truly be whole without the do-without Jacob. He knew from prior experience that she was never truly whole without himself, either. He also knew that he had to let her make whatever decision she made. Sighing deeply, he turned around. He needed to tell Bella that she could go if that was her decision.
"Isabella, my love…"
"Edward…I…I'm sorry. I love you. I need…I need you to know that" Bella was a wreck. A complete and total train wreck. Hair disheveled and wild, eyes bloodshot from hours of crying, runny nose and tattered heart, Bella looked at Edward with a mask of calm on her agonized face. She couldn't cry anymore. "I need him, and…and I need to have change in my life," She whispered, quoting Rosalie, who nodded from the corner in grim satisfaction and understanding.
"Go to him, Bella. If I cannot make you happy, and if he can, go to him. I would rather you be with him and happy, than be with me, soul-less and….and dead. " Edward smiled inwardly, in spite of himself, for his mask of calm was so much more believable than hers, even while his heart was breaking into a thousand more pieces. He closed his eyes briefly, the pain was excruciating. When he opened them, Bella's eyes met his agonizingly.
Bella looked into his eyes for a second that went beyond the ebb and flow of time, turned around in a kind of awkward half-pirouette, and dashed out of the house. She had already said her goodbyes.
The entire Cullen family edged toward the door, silently watching her go. Alice, who had an especially close bond with Bella, winced as she saw her future disappear. Jaspar was doing a good job of regulating the crazy emotions that ran tense and wild through the air, but it only slightly dulled the pain that Edward felt, watching Bella walk away. He felt a hand on either shoulder, and silently accepted Esme's and Carlisle's touch. Emmet put his arm around Rosalie's waist, silently reassuring her that she did nothing wrong. As they watched Bella reach her truck, Carlisle stepped forward and gracefully closed the door. As a family, the Cullens silently turned around and went back into the house.
Blindly, Bella walked toward her truck, letting the tears flow again. Her mind was full of a thousand doubts, a thousand regrets, and a thousand hopes. What if Jacob imprinted on someone else? What if Jacob didn't want her anymore? It's been two years, and they had both changed, she was certain. The mere fact that she was walking away from Edward was tearing apart that hole in her chest that had long since healed and scarred over. She hoped Jacob could mend it again. She hoped Jacob would be willing to mend it again.
As she was pulling in to Charlie's driveway, her pulse quickened as she realized she was going to see him again. Jacob, after two long years, she was going to see her best friend. She fumbled for a moment with the seatbelt, he numb hands anticipating the warmth of Jacob's. It had been so long since they were warmed by his touch.
The hole in Bella's chest was warning her that it would be much more painful later on, but Bella ignored it, or perhaps didn't notice in her present urgency to see Jacob. Finally achieving success with the seat belt buckle, she flung the door open and ran up the steps to the front door. Not bothering to knock, since she knew Charlie was expecting her, she wrenched open the front door and bounded in, creating a series of rather unfortunate events. As she ran through the door, she managed to successfully trip over the umbrella holder and fall. Throwing her hands out in front of her they managed to land on the "Welcome" mat, which sent her sliding like a toboggan four feet down the short hallway and straight into a pair of bare feet, which she noticed, were trembling.
Just my luck, she thought frantically, graceful entries were never my forte…
A pair of strong arms were suddenly around her waist, pulling her off the ground. Warm arms. And they felt so good. Looking up, Isabella Cullen met the disbelieving, wilderness-hardened eyes of Jacob Black. My Jacob… She melted into him and started sobbing all over again
"I'm sorry Jake I'm so so sorry I can't bear hurting you you're hurting you left you left me and never said goodbye and it's my fault but you're HERE and I need you so badly..I left him..I left him just now because of you and I need you and I'm sor-" She was cut off as her face was pressed into his bare shoulder. His hand was on the back of her head, holding her there. He was stroking her hair, as he always did, and he was warm. So warm. She just hoped he was warm enough to melt through two years of ice.
"Bells, honey... you're…you're you!" Jacob held her as tight as he dared.
All he could hear was her muffled sobbing, but he could smell her, alive, she doesn't smell of death, he could see her, no leech is clumsy enough to fall through a door and skid five feet, not to mention bloodsuckers are too dead to cry, and he could sense her, feel her. He felt the life running through her, he felt her heart beating its beautiful rhythm strongly against his chest. He gripped her tightly and closed his eyes, letting himself savor the moment, and praying to God that it wasn't a dream.
"I'm back Bella, I'm back and I'm here and it will be okay" He rubbed her back in big, slow, circular motions. He always knew how to calm her down. Letting out a huge, shuddery sigh, Jacob allowed himself this moment to let tears of relief flow, and they cried together. Bella wrapped her arms around Jacob's waist, comforting him in return. She has always attempted to ease his pain with her hugs. And it had almost always worked.
Time passed, and gradually, her sobs subsided, leaving only a stray hiccup or two. A knock at the doorframe made both Bella and Jacob jump. Looking up, they saw Charlie standing awkwardly at the door, pushing Billy in front of him.
"Erm, there's Pizza if you'd like some," he said.
Reluctantly, Jacob and Bella detached themselves from each other. Talking could wait. They had the whole day ahead of them. Standing up, they shuffled into the kitchen to get pizza, uncomfortably aware of the eyes of their fathers boring into the backs of their heads.
