Author's Note: This is mostly just a "Inside Near's Head" chapter. Poor Near, I'm making him suffer quite a bit. Well, maybe things will change. Who knows? Well, pfft, I do, because I'm the author! :D

Near: Show off.

Author: HEY! YOU BETTER BE NICE TO ME OR I'LL MAKE YOU SUFFER EVEN MORE!

Near: ...

Author: ENJOYY! :D


"Near, calm down."

Rester rested a hand on the boy's shoulder. Near glared angrily at Rester and jerked his shoulder out of the man's grip. He had never felt such a mix of emotions at once. Anger, humiliation, disappointment, fear, and rage. They were all there, swarming within him. A day had passed since Near discovered that the love of his life, Katsumi, was another one of those Kira worshipers. She had said something about being indebted to Kira for saving her father's life, but he didn't register her words; he couldn't register anything at that moment. He sent her off with the excuse he had an urgent call and needed to deal with it immediately. She saw no falter in his personality and obeyed; Lidner lead her out.

"Near, don't worry. She may be another one of those idiot Kira lovers, but it doesn't take away your feelings for her!"

Near felt his heart give a familiar jolt and he shook his head, a wave of hot anger rolling down his spine. His temples throbbed painfully.

"Rester, there is one problem with that statement." Near held up one solitary finger. "She is a Kira follower." He jabbed this finger in the direction of the hundreds of television screens that displayed a scene from the latest Kira murder: a man laying in the corner of his jail cell, blood splattered all over the walls, a knife resting on the palm of his right hand.

"Very true but--"

"But nothing." Near growled. "Someone who thinks that is justice is obviously not the girl for me. No matter how much I think she is beautiful or wonderful or..." He trailed off, staring vacantly out the window, absorbed in his thoughts about Katsumi. Rester sighed and placed both hands on his shoulders.

"Near, I understand how you feel, I honestly do. When I was younger, this girl, a gorgeous blond-haired girl, was everything I wanted in a girlfriend. I dated her for three years before I found out she was a party animal. You know, the kind of girls that go to rave clubs and get their drinks spiked. My personality does not consist of being excessively wild like this girl was. Every Saturday, she would go off to a party and every Saturday night, I would get a phone call by somebody at the party to tell me to pick up my girlfriend and make sure she got home alright."

Near looked up curiously when Rester fell silent. He was gazing dreamily over in Lidner's direction, who was organizing a file of documents. A light bulb went off in Near's mind and his lips twisted up into a small smile.

"It was Lidner, wasn't it?"

Rester snapped his eyes back in Near's direction and blushed. His reaction was all Near needed for confirmation that he was right.

"I can't see Lidner as a party animal..." Near muttered quietly. He tried picture Lidner, sporting a low cut belly shirt, a mini skirt, and bright red high heels, dancing on a table, a bottle of wine in her hand, to some odd techno-based music. The picture was blurry. He glanced at Lidner now, who was sporting a modest white shirt with a dark gray dress blazer and matching gray pants. Lidner felt his eyes and looked up.

"Anything you need, Near?" She asked, beginning to move over to him. He shook his head quickly, turning away from her and back to Rester.

"Are you still in love with her?"

Rester sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He seemed to be thinking about what he was going to say, as though it was one of the hardest decisions of his life. Agony settled thickly onto his expression before he relaxed his face and looked down at Near.

"No. I don't think I am."

Near could heard the pain behind the statement and he knew Rester was lying.

"What if this happens to me? I don't want to get hurt..." Near muttered to himself. Rester answered him regardless.

"No one said love wasn't going to hurt."

Near sighed and sat down onto the cold floor, staring out of the window to the swarms of people below. His lover, Katsumi, was a Kira follower and believed Kira to be a hero. The influences of Kira's Kingdom on Sakura TV wasn't helping her change her mind either. He tried to think of other solutions to this most obvious problem. What if Kira ended up killing her father? No, he wouldn't dare stoop to Kira's level and ask for help. Ask to murder her father. That would lie forever on his conscious like a heavy weight. But then again, that would convince her that Kira was not justice but a kind of evil...

"Near."

He snapped out of his thoughts to turn and see Gevanni standing in the place where Rester had once been.

"Yes, what is it, Gevanni?"

"You might want to see this. I know this wouldn't help your most current situation, but I thought it would be a crime to not show you."

Gevanni handed him a thick creme-colored folder filled with pages and pages of information on Katsumi. There was a copy of her birth certificate and copies of her school pictures starting from grade one. He looked up to see Gevanni smiling softly at him.

"I know you are hurting and I thought, the more you know about her, the better it might be for you to figure out what to do."

"Thank you Gevanni. I sincerely appreciate it."

Pictures, stories, basic information, and newspaper clippings. Everything he could possibly want to know about Katsumi was all there. He turned to a particularly ragged piece of newspaper. It was obvious Gevanni wasn't good with scissors. He immediately saw the blown-up picture of Katsumi, along with other Kira followers, cheering and clapping in front of the Sakura TV studio. Near's heart jolted painfully as he looked at the determined look on Katsumi's face; the mischievous gleam in her eyes. He sighed and set the folder down, trying to think of what to do. Just then, the idea of asking Kira to kill her father made itself known and he cringed at the idea. He couldn't go out and ask Kira to kill her father! He'd have to give Kira a good, believable excuse, make up a story that he was a criminal, and provide his name and face to him. But the only way to contact Kira was to broadcast it on the news and surely Katsumi would see this and know immediately who it was that was the cause of it. He could see her now, storming into the SPK and throwing stuff, tears streaming down her cheeks. He could hear her screams of hate and anger and the sound of glass shattering. She would approach him and begin to hit him. It wasn't pretty...

He sighed and shook his head, trying to rid his mind of the painful assumption of what could happen. He brainstormed for more ideas, but continued coming up blank.

"Near, I think it's best you put this off for now. It's getting late. It's already midnight and Rester is beginning to complain." Lidner stood behind Near, expecting a response.

Near nodded once and Lidner bid him goodnight and went off to alert Rester and Gevanni that they were free to move to their own bedrooms. As Rester shut off all the computers and Gevanni cut off the lights, Near didn't move. His mind was swallowed up in frustration when suddenly, an idea came to him. He sat in the dark, chuckling at his newly-formed idea...

"This should work perfectly..." He muttered to himself in the darkness.


ENDING NOTE: CHAPTER 5 COMING REEEEEAL SOON! :D Keep an eye out!