Byakuya
Chapter 28
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"Let's call it a day." Neji said as he noticed Naruto doing the move wrong for the tenth time.
"Why?" Naruto asked confused, throwing a look at the sun that was still quite high.
"You're fretting. You obviously can't concentrate." Neji answered and Naruto frowned.
"And besides, it's lunch time." Neji added fast, and as expected Naruto forgot his thought of line as soon as food was mentioned.
"Oooh! Neji-chan! You're gonna buy me lunch aren't you?" Naruto asked, smiling coyly. Neji stared.
"No." Neji said blankly, before starting to walk towards the village.
"Please?" Naruto whined as he started to jump around the Hyuuga smiling brightly.
"No."
"Come on, come on!" Naruto brought his fists under his chin and turned his eyes into swimming pools of pleading. Neji froze.
Resist the puppy eyes... Resist the puppy eyes...
"Onegai…?" Naruto pleaded and brought his shoulders close to his torso, trying to make himself look more feminine. Neji still has that strange look on his face, Naruto thought.
"No. Please don't ask me again." Neji said, hating how weak his voice sounded.
"Come on!" Naruto whined. Neji looked helplessly around, trying to not to give into the pleading, searching for an escape. White eyes widened as he spotted a distraction. Behind a nearby bush he could see the telltale white hair of the third sannin, Jiraiya. Theatrically over-playing the movement, Neji brought his left hand; the one Naruto wasn't hugging; to point at the sannin.
"Isn't that your teacher?" Neji asked, trying to appear as normal as possible as he planned his escape. Naruto turned his blue eyes to look at the sannin, confusion spreading onto his face. Naruto jumped off Neji and started to walk towards the sannin, his steps slightly hesitant.
"A bit weird that Ero-sennin is here. He was supposed to be in thunder country… weird, isn't it, Neji?" Naruto asked. Getting no answer, Naruto looked around him and failed to spot the Hyuuga.
"Neji?" Naruto wailed scared while inside he was cursing.
Damn! There went my lunch. Though… Well, might as well see what Ero-sennin is up to. Maybe I can talk him into buying me lunch. Thee hee hee…
"Yo! Ero-sennin! What are you doing?" Naruto yelled while skipping towards his teacher. Of all reactions Naruto expected to have, the least likely happened. Jiraiya turned to look at Naruto in horror before hiding the papers he had been doodling in inside his yukata.
"Ah! Brat! Umm, wait! I can…explain!" Jiraiya yelled hurriedly, before starting to back away from the confused Naruto. "…I admit that I took some inspiration to the newest book of my Icha Icha from yourself and Gaara, but I really didn't draw you, more like people who look kind of look like you…" The sannin continued. Naruto froze.
"You drew pictures of persons based on Gaara and me on your Icha Icha books?" Naruto asked dangerously. Jiraiya froze.
"Wait… you didn't know?" Jiraiya asked backing into a three. Images of the previous Icha Icha books that Naruto had read flashed though Naruto's mind. The thought of hundreds of people reading about a character based on him having sex made Naruto shiver. He also felt rage bubble inside himself.
"YOU DID WHAT!" Naruto raged, starting to clench his fists.
"Oh come on Naruto, it's nothing serious! I even changed the names!" Jiraiya sweat dropped. Naruto's eyes turned into slits.
"Names?"
"Umm, yeah! I'm sure nobody will connect Rokudaime to you. I mean Gaara can be connected to Kazekage, but then again there have been many kazekages'… in… Suna…" Jiraiya tried to explain. Naruto blanched.
There is porn, out there, in the world, about me, as in Rokudaime…
"As you probably remember, I said I'd beat you to death if you ever drew something remotely like me in your Icha Icha books…." Naruto started and Jiraiya nodded fearfully. "…a Promise is a promise. Oiroke no jutsu!" Naruto yelled, turning into a beautiful blonde girl with long curvy legs and a huge pair of breasts. Naruto gave Jiraiya an evil look, though the man didn't notice as he was already drooling and keeping close watch on Naruto's breasts.
Naruto let out an evil laugh before jumping Jiraiya. Not that the man minded for the first three seconds of course. It wasn't until Naruto started beating and kicking him that Jiraiya regretted not training immunity to the 'Oiroke no jutsu' which was the only jutsu which with Naruto could defeat Jiraiya in minutes.
Clapping his hands proudly, Naruto looked at the bloody mess in front of him that could no longer be recognized as the sennin.
"Thee hee hee… Never mess with Uzumaki Naruto, the future Hokage!" Naruto laughed mischievously to himself dispelling the sexy technique.
"Kai!" Naruto yelled, and waited for the wave of chakra sweep over him and return him to his original form.
Except, it didn't work.
"Kai!" Naruto yelled this time more frantically. "Dispel, damn it!" Naruto cursed, before starting to look around himself frantically. Then out of the corner of his eye he spotted Neji who was still on the process of sneaking out of the clearing.
"Neji! Help!" Naruto wailed with his voice filled with despair. Neji cringed as his escape was prevented, but seeing Naruto in his girl form walked to the Uzumaki.
"Why on earth are you a girl?" Neji asked, slightly amazed. Naruto looked horrified.
"I don't know! I can't dispel my Oiroke no jutsu!" Naruto wailed again, trying to control his breathing.
Come on Naruto, deep breaths, deep breaths, this isn't the end of the world, you're only stuck. As a girl.
Neji looked horrified as Naruto burst into tears, his oncoming death and being stuck as a girl being too much for the blonde. Naruto latched onto Neji, hugging the brunette for dear life.
"What am I going to do?" Naruto tugged on Neji's white coat. Neji cleared his throat while looking around wildly, searching for another distraction.
"Look, a bird!" Neji yelled. Naruto didn't even look where Neji pointed, but smiled devilishly up to the eighteen year old ninja.
"Hah! You'll never catch me with the same trick twice, Neji-chan!" Naruto started to cackled devilishly and Neji almost sighted aloud. He couldn't deal with crying girls. Crying naked girls.
Naruto was naked.
"Naruto, you're naked!" Neji stated slightly shocked, while pushing the blonde off him. Naruto looked confused at Neji, and then to himself and after turning the events and Neji's reaction in his head a couple of times blushed slightly and smacked Neji across his face. Hard.
"Pervert!" Naruto snapped, covering his breasts with his arms. Being naked, even though it wasn't the real him, wasn't nearly as fun as it was if he was in the Oiroke no jutsu only couple of seconds.
"Calm down!" Neji snapped his face red where a hand-mark was pressed on his face. Naruto looked at the Hyuuga blankly.
"Are you aware that I uh, kinda, slapped you?" Naruto asked dazedly, before shaking his head. "…uh, I mean, umm, did you know that you have like, this, huge red mark on your cheek? You should really cover it up or people are going to think you've begun peeping." Naruto nodded to himself on the last part.
"No, I didn't notice." Neji remarked sarcastically, something Naruto was totally obvious to.
"Oh really…? Well, there is, just so you know?" Naruto said innocently, starting to jump around slightly as he started to feel the cold. Neji wondered if now would be a good time to tell Naruto that jumping really wasn't a good idea when Naruto's arms barely covered the jumping appendages.
"Don't jump." Neji hissed between clenched teeth, while discreetly wiping the small trail of blood running from his nose. Naruto looked at Neji confused.
"Uh, why?" The blonde asked, confused.
"You're a girl." Neji explained, while making it clear he wasn't going to elaborate. Naruto looked baffled before he realized that his chest was, indeed, jumping.
"Gaah! I'm a girl!" Naruto wailed again, and tears started to gather in his eyes again. Neji scratched the back of his head.
"Look, I'm sure the Gondaime can fix you in seconds." Neji said, and Naruto clutched into the suggestion like a life line.
"Really?" Naruto eagerly inquired.
"Really."
"Really really?"
"Yes really really, now go!" Neji insisted. Naruto looked wildly around for a second, searching for something to wear. Even though Naruto wasn't the most modest person, even he realized he couldn't just run through the whole village stark naked, the white clouds that usually covered him having been dispelled ages ago.
Spotting his teacher, Naruto ran to the sannin, starting to look if he could steal a shirt or something from the pervert. Naruto started to search the unconscious body when some papers fell from the folds of Jiraiya's yukata. Naruto looked at the papers confused before picking the doodles up and looking at them.
Neji looked in fascination as Naruto's face turned the brightest red he had ever seen.
Naruto squeaked and jumped away from Jiraiya while hugging the papers tightly to his curvy chest. "That pervert…" Naruto muttered, before deciding he couldn't wear anything from the hermit. Naruto made sure not to drop any of the papers as he spotted finally something he could wear.
Neji gulped as he saw the suddenly hungry look Naruto threw at him.
"Uh…Naruto, don't do anything harsh…"
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"Naruto!" Neji yelled enraged after the blonde who was laughing maniacally.
"Nee nee! Catch me if you can, Neji-chan!" Naruto rhymed awfully.
"Get back here, you girl!" Neji yelled, hoping Naruto would stop, but instead the blonde started crying and ran even faster.
Oh god, I'm a girl, I'm a girl, I'm a girl, I'm gonna die, I'm a girl, I'm gonna die, die, die! Naruto yelled in his head frantically while hugging the sketches tightly into his chest.
There's no way I'm going to let anyone see these…oh god, I'm a girl.
Naruto ran faster, missing completely the white figure walking on one of the streets Naruto jumped over; reading a certain orange book and laughing outright.
"I can't believe Rokudaime has an own porn manga!" The white figure on the street under laughed. "Wait till he sees this! Hey…umm…he…hum…is that even possible? No way a cherry can be used like that… oh...OH!"
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A/N: So here, a double update! …As an apology for not updating yesterday. But I was hit by a sudden writers block there, so… Anyway, hope you enjoyed…And I have to, for my own part to say, that writing the more humouring bit in this chapter was very entertaining.
And I've got 234 reviews already! I love you guys!
--Dark
Reeevieeeeeew!
