Title: PEACE AND WAR
Disclaimer: I don't own anything about Sailor Moon
Authors Notes: Here's another chapter. I know it's coming really quickly after my last one, but something tells me that not to many people are going to complain about that. Let me know what you think!
That night Darien burned with fever. The wound in his shoulder had given way to infection and his body stubbornly fought if off.
Serenity never left him.
All night, as Darien tried fitfully to sleep, Serenity sat by him trying to make him more comfortable. She held a cool cloth to his forehead and tried to sooth him with her voice. Sometimes he looked at her and she could see in him a soul that he desperately wanted to hold her, but other times his eyes looked lost as his fever cast him into delirium. She held his hand tightly when his brow would contract to show his pain.
She was aware of the people coming and going from the room. The doctor often came in to change his bandages and check on the path of the infection. He said if Darien could make it through the night then he would be fine.
Raye sat quietly by his bed for a time, watching her brother battle with an illness that she could not save him from. Serenity could see the powerlessness in her eyes that mirrored her own feelings.
And then every once in awhile, he would looked up at her clearly for only a moment, and ask her why she was still there. When that happened, Serenity would only smile and promise never to leave.
For a moment, everything else seemed forgotten. Serenity couldn't worry about the war or her home and she couldn't worry about Prince Diamond. All she could see was the man in front of her whom she had professed her love.
He hadn't denied her. He hadn't said that he didn't return her feelings. In fact, it was quite the opposite. He loved her. But he couldn't be with her because he was afraid of tainting her. She cursed her innocence, but could not be angry with him. All she had to do was wait until the war was over, and then they could be together. But first, he needed to get better.
The sun had already started to come up when the doctor pronounced him out of danger. His fever had broken, and with time he would make a full recovery. But they all knew that Darien would not allow himself the luxury of time. He couldn't afford not to go back to the fight.
When he woke up they could all see that he had hardened back into his usual emotionless state. His eyes were firm and his hand was steady. He looked pale and weak, but his voice was serious.
"We must attack while the enemy is still reeling from its last defeat," he said to his guards once all the women had left the room. The three men just looked at him hesitantly. They did not have the courage to tell him he was wrong to push himself back into the war.
"Kunzite has re-established the army and they are awaiting your command," Zoicite said after a moment.
"Has the enemy moved?" Darien asked flinching as he tried to lift his arm.
"Their base is a few miles back, but it is an easy distance," Nephrite answered.
"Good, then we shall be ready for another attack within a few days," he said stubbornly.
"You majesty, I don't……"
"If you think you're going to talk me into resting, then you're wasting your breath," Darien said to Jedeite firmly. "I will take two days to regain my strength, and then we will head back to battle. Jedeite, you will continue your duties to the princess, my sister and the other ladies at once."
"Of course," Jedeite said bowing slightly.
Darien went silent for a moment.
His face seemed to soften and he looked towards his window. The day was not sunny, but it was not dark.
The two men watched his emotions change and wondered at why.
Jedeite thought he knew what it might be and hesitated before speaking.
"Will you spend your two days with the Princess?" He asked cautiously.
Darien stayed silent for another moment.
Jedeite almost assumed that he wasn't going to answer.
"She told me she wanted to give me her heart," he said softly.
All three men looked at him in surprise.
"And what did you say?" Nephrite asked.
"I said that I could not think of allowing myself to love her until the war was over."
"Is that true?" Zoicite asked.
Darien shook his head. "I've already in my mind given her my heart, but I will not tell her," he said sighing. "How can I allow myself to love her when it will only bring her pain."
The men looked at him, knowing it wasn't really a question for them.
"I don't think you give her enough credit," Jedeite said after a moment. "Just because you're full of darkness, does not mean she's the one who will be tainted. You might find that instead, it is her that taints you."
Darien looked at Jedeite evenly, his eyes full of emotion. He saw that Jedeite was sure of what he said, and that he looked steadily back at him. Darien wondered why he chose this issue to stand up against him when there were many others he knew Jedeite didn't approve of. Perhaps he himself was in love.
"You think I should change my answer?" He asked.
"I think that you should for once do what only you want to do and not worry about anyone else. If you love her, then go for her. If she won't have you, then fight for her. Realize you might die in this war and if you do you will never know what it was like to be loved by someone who loves you back with so much passion."
Darien didn't know what to say.
"Serenity is strong and she loves you with all her heart. I have no doubt that she will wait for you. But for her, it may be now or never. If you die, you will die without her."
Darien remember the words Serenity had spoken to him the night before. 'To die alone is the worst kind of death there is.'
"Carry out my orders," he said gently.
The three men bowed to him obediently and left the room slowly. Jedeite looked back at his confused King and hoped that he made the right decision.
Darien just sat there alone, his mind full of confusion. He loved her, he was sure of it. But was that enough to make her happy? Was he even capable of making her happy? But what if that wasn't the point. What if Serenity was not offering to allow him the opportunity of making her happy, what if she was offering to make him happy? That would be just the type of unselfish thing she would do at a time like this. She said she would love him no matter what.
He sighed as he leaned back in bed and closed his eyes.
He thought of her.
The war plagued his mind, but she eased his torments. Nobody else could do that.
And then she had called him by his name.
He had been both surprised and excited that she had used his name. It seemed to roll of her tongue like she had said it many times before. It was the first time she had called him by his name and it had sent pleasurable shivers right through him. He wanted nothing more that for her to say it again. He was so sick of being called King that it had been a refreshing change. It had sounded so natural coming from her.
He sighed and rolled out of bed.
Serenity sat with Mina and Amy at the small table they had put up for the card games. She smiled when Mina put her cards down in triumph. She looked at her own hand and knew that she had won.
"Fold," Serenity said gently.
Mina squealed in delight at her win and Serenity couldn't help but feel her heart swell up with happiness for this small moment of glory. Even in these dark times Mina had been true to her nature. She delighted in little pleasures and shone like the sun, golden and radiant.
"Either you are improving your game or you have found some sort of luck," Amy said piling up the cards once again.
"I think it is this place," Mina said looking around. "I never seemed to win back home."
"Do you like it here?" Serenity asked.
Mina shrugged. "It is nothing like home at all. The sun shines less and the air is colder, but I do love the castle. It has so many places to explore. Raye said that it's full of secret passageways. She said that there is one that goes from her room to the Kings room below. Years ago the King would take the room down below and Raye's room would be for his mistress."
Amy laughed at that. "Why did Raye take the room of the King's mistress."
"She said the King, when he was very young, took care of her more than anyone else. He chose that room for her so that he could be there in a moment if she should need him."
Serenity smiled lightly at the story of Darien in his youth.
"That was very nice of him," Amy said dealing the cards again.
Mina nodded and looked at Serenity. She desperately wanted to ask her about the King, but she kept her mouth shut on the subject. She only hoped Serenity would not be to badly hurt.
"Where do you think Prince Diamond is today?" Amy asked.
"What do you mean?" Serenity asked.
Mina looked at her surprised. "How have you not heard?"
"Heard what?" Serenity asked sitting straighter.
"He went away this morning," Amy said softly. "He told no one where he was going and didn't even see the King before he left. His carriage was ordered and he set off."
"Where?" Serenity asked.
"Perhaps he went home," Amy answered.
"Lita said that he hardly ever spends time in his own country. Perhaps he became bored with us all and decided to make his way to he next one," Mina said. "Either way, it means that we don't have to stay confined to our rooms all the time and we don't have to worry about him bothering us."
"It also means that Jedeite will go with the King back to the war to fight. We will be here on our own."
"We have Raye and Lita," Serenity said easily. "We will not need any more company than that."
Serenity looked out the window and saw the sun stubbornly trying to peak out from the clouds. She couldn't help just smile at how hard it was trying.
"Let's go outside," she said standing up suddenly.
Mina and Amy looked at her startled, but then followed her out of the room, through the castle and into the damp wilderness that was the world.
They did not go very far, only a few feet into the gardens. The grass was damp from rain and they would get wet and muddy if they journeyed farther. So they simply stood where they were, watching and cheering on the sun as if it were the most common thing in the world to talk with it.
Amy heard something behind them and turned around.
"Your majesty," she said curtsying lightly and catching the attention of the other two girls. Mina quickly did the same, but Serenity stood where she was, looking at him evenly.
You would not know that Darien was hurt at all. His face was still pale, but his clothes hid the bandage and he walked tall and strong as if this were just another day.
"If you would excuse us ladies, I wish to speak with Serenity," he said softly.
Amy and Mina looked at Serenity surprised, but when she smiled at them they quickly walked back into the castle, leaving the two of them completely alone. Of course they didn't go very far, and found Raye, Lita and the three guards standing right inside the castle looking out the window at them. They joined the party. Mina had concern in her eyes.
Serenity didn't say anything, she just watched him.
"How are you today?" He asked calmly.
"I am very well," she said politely.
"I am glad to hear it," Darien said. He hesitated, and the took a few steps towards her so that he was standing directly in front of her.
Serenity had to look up slightly to meet his eyes.
"I hope I didn't offend you with my answer," he said earnestly.
"Not in the least," she said matching his calm demeanor.
"But you don't take back what you said?" He asked.
Serenity looked at him like that was the stupidest question anyone had ever asked her. She couldn't help but smile.
"Not a single word," she answered honestly.
Darien couldn't help but smile at the way her eyes danced when she laughed. He felt a great weight lifted off of him, and he realized that he had been fearing that she might since the night before.
"Do you take back what you said?" She asked still smiling.
"Yes," he said, causing her to look taken back.
He gently took her hand in his. Her skin was soft and delicate against his own.
"I said that I would no allow myself to love you until the war is over. I think that I might hurt you if I tell you my true feelings now when I am at risk of losing my life in this war."
Serenity was almost painfully aware of how close he was to her. She could feel the warmth of his hand seeping into her. Her heart beat nervously.
"But," he continued gently. "You told me that the worst way to die is to die alone. I don't want to die without knowing you."
Serenity felt tears in her eyes, but refused to let them fall.
"I have an answer for that," she said softly. "You could not die."
Darien couldn't help but laugh at her. She smiled up at him so happily.
Serenity loved the way he laughed, even if it was just for a moment.
"I love you," he said softly. He brought his hand up to caress her face. She delighted in the feeling of his hands on her skin. He touched her curled hair and then her shoulder.
"I won't let you die alone," Serenity said taking his hand gently in hers and bringing it to her lips. She kissed it gently and used her fingers to caress it. She stepped closer to him so that their bodies were almost touching. He leaned down to rest his forehead gently against hers and breathed her in.
And then he felt it. For the first time since he was a small child. In this pure and simple moment, he felt happy.
Darien stood silent, focusing on the beautiful girl standing securely wrapped in his arms. He could tell she was trying not to cry and he smiled at that. In all his years of war, this was the first time he had been sent off in this fashion and he had to conclude that he liked it.
"We could very well be back in only a couple days," he said trying to sooth her. Al he could focus on was the feeling of her body against his and the way she pulled him tightly towards her.
She nodded into his shirt.
"After that this war could be over," he said.
She nodded again.
"And then we can be together," he said finally getting her to look up at him.
Serenity was trying her hardest no to cry. She had just spent that last two days with him and already she was saying goodbye.
They had been happy, and she could tell he wasn't used to the feeling. She had gone easy on him, doing small things like kissing his cheek or holding his hand. He had been in the darkness so long she didn't want to blind him with light. She had seen a side to him that was aching to come out and she wanted the time to help him find his peace. But now he was going back to war.
"I will wait for you," she said softly.
Darien looked down into her beautiful blue eyes and couldn't help but feel a pull at his heart. He didn't want to leave her. But he knew that he now had an even greater pull to come back to her.
He tilted her chin up towards him and placed a light kiss on her lips. He could feel her heart beat faster and he couldn't help but smile at her reaction towards him.
"I will come back to you," he whispered.
He kissed her again before slowly stepping away from her. She felt his absence immediately and wished he would not leave. But she could not ask him to stay. She could not ask him to give up his fight for peace to stay a few more days with her. So she just smiled at him as best she could, with tears in her eyes, praying that he would come back to her.
Darien was stiff by the time they arrived at the camp. The smell of war still lingered all around, and his shoulder throbbed painfully. But all he had to do was think of her and it seemed like the world simply melted away from him. He smiled at the feeling.
"are you alright?" Kunzite asked eagerly when Darien got off his horse a little awkwardly.
"I'm still alive," he said smiling and walking past him.
Kunzite watched his prince walk away with a confused look on his face. He couldn't remember the last time he had seen Darien look so……at peace. He looked almost happy.
"The princess Serenity confessed her feelings or him," Zoicite said coming up next to him.
Kunzite looked at the three guards in surprised. "She did?"
"And even better," Nephrite said. "He confessed his feelings back."
"He did?" Kunzite said not able to get over the surprise.
"Yes, and now he's in love and happy. Who would have thought," Jedeite said sarcastically, but he couldn't help the smile on his face. He was absolutely excited about the fact that Darien had found a kind of happiness. Now all they needed was to end the war, and then life would be perfect.
"Will it distract him?" Kunzite asked after a moment.
"Yes," Zoicite said. "But I think a distraction is exactly what he needs to get through this next battle."
"How badly hurt is he?" Kunzite asked.
"If he fights in this battle, he will die," Nephrite said squashing the bright mood.
The guards looked at their King walking easily through the camp. The soldiers all around him bowed and then cheered at their returned hero. Their spirits were lifted and they were filled with the spirit of victory. Darien had always had that affect on the men.
"There must be at least two of us with him at all times," Kunzite said softly.
"It would be better if we knocked him out cold, fought the battle and then tell him we've won and he fought brilliantly," Jedeite said not able to get over his glee.
"That's not a bad idea," Nephrite said smiling.
Kunzite couldn't help but grin, but his mind was still troubled.
He would not let his King die.
End of chapter Thirteen!
Please Review! Thanky you so much for some of the critiques I got. It really helps me make the story better.
