Courtney's island
Chris. Evil, malicious Chris Maclean. He WOKE US UP at 5:00 and told us, and I quote, "Start hiking!" excuse me?!!!!!!
What were we trekking, you may ask? Why, an incredibly 89.9 degree slope of course! I swear I could kill right now. And to make it worse: everyone was singing those stupid camp songs! You know, little red wagon, rickabamboo, B-I-N-G-O, and the 'letter home' song. I guess they thought it would lighten the mood. PSH.
I sort of sulked along near the back, trying to show my not-so-happy mood to Chris without being disrespectful. Like he'd care anyway. After a while the ever-bundle-of-joy Bridgette noticed and dragged me into another song:
"Nobody loves me,
Everybody hates me,
I guess I'll go eat worms!
Nice fat juicy one-"
I cut her off. "That is SOO gross."
"Eh, kind of. But it's for fun, Court! Come on!"
I grumbled but joined in the chorus of 'we will rock you'. Duncan and Gwen seemed to know the words best.
….,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….
Holy crap. Sharks… cliff… imbecilely teeny ring… GOD. I almost fainted.
"So… who's up first?" Bridge stammered nervously. Hey, but I didn't feel sorry for her. She WAS the one who told Chris it was a piece of cake.
Cricket cricket. Owen breaks the silence, "Oh come on guys! I hear these shows always make the interns do it first, to make sure it's survivable!"
Yeah. And they're probably all dead.
"So who's up?" Bridgette pressed, obviously praying it wouldn't have to be her.
"Ladies first," Duncan purred.
Oh goodness. He couldn't be flirting with me… could he?
"Fine. I'll go," Bridgette replied bracingly. "It's no biggie… just an insane cliff dive into a circle of angry sharks." And she executed a perfect swan dive into the water… hundreds. Of. Feet… below… her…
And I almost died on the spot.
….,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….
One by one the other bass jumped. The only chicken so far was DJ, which is when we learned about the dreaded 'chicken hat'.
I couldn't do it. "excuse me, Chris? I have a medical condition?"
"what condition."
"A condition that prevents me from jumping off cliffs?" also known as sanity?
He smirked. "You could chicken out if you want, but it might cost your team the win. And then they'll hate you." Like anyone could hate a CIT.
It was a calculated risk, of course. "It's a calculated risk. I've seen the other team, and I don't think nine of them will jump."
"Okay… here's your chicken hat." And he shoved me over to the escalator-of-shame without another wasted word. No one could hate a CIT, I reminded myself. Right?
….,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….
#$%^&*#$%^&*%^#%#! Our hot tub was absolutely terrible! I mean, it was crooked, and ductaped together, and… I had to prevent myself from either sobbing or ripping someone's head off.
The gophers won, of course. Stupid, no-good, evil- okay I should probably stop there. Not PG, people: and I pride myself on my language.
….,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….
"um, what do we do now?" Katie asked. Apparently she was on our team. Wait… no… Sadie was the one originally on the other team…
"We have to choose who we're going to vote off," I replied decisively, illuminating my fine leadership skills that made me essential to the team.
"Well I think it should be princess," Duncan-the-oaf said, pointing his thumb over his shoulder to me, "Or the brick house here," he continued, indicating DJ.
"WHAT? Why?!"
"because, unless I'm mistaken, you two are the only ones wearing chicken hats. And if we ever have to lift a truck, I like our odds with the big guy."
"b-but you guys need me! I'm the only one-"
"WE KNOW." Bridgette, my supposed friend, cut me off. Apparently she had joined the dark side. "who used to be a real CIT. So who would you pick?"
I glanced around, still
a little put out. AHA! "what about: HIM!" I exclaimed,
pointing at a surprised Tyler.
"NO!" shouted Lindsay, followed
by her muttering something about salt.
"heyheyhey, at least he jumped off the cliff, chicken wing!"
"SHUT IT!"
suddenly Geoff appeared out of nowhere. "Okay, let's just chill out. This is getting way to heavy!"
Duncan glared. "I've had enough prison food for one day… I'm gonna go take a nap."
He can't do that! "You can't do that! We haven't decided who's going yet!" But he had already left.
"I just don't see why we lost, ay? I mean, they're the ones with more girls!"
H oh boy, he's going to die.
….,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….
Are you recording this? Good. Well they can enjoy their little party- all they want! But I'm going to win this competition. And NOTHING is gonna stop me!
Forever's babbly a/n:
You like? You hate? You attack with DubbleV's metal bat? Yeah, well I have a bazooka- with flying monkeys! SO THERE! Ahem… moment of temporary insanity.
I'm sorry it took so long to update… heheh… I forgot I had this chappie hidden in my notebook until I checked out someone's profile and saw they had favorited it (WOOOOOT). So thanks for checking in!
-Forevs
