"I can't believe you're going to have a baby." Eric shook his head, "It's... weird."
He was accosted by glares from both expectant parents.
"So have you broke the news to Lily yet?" Blair asked conversationally.
"Since we're not hearing howls of injustice and shrieks of anguish from the other side of town, I'd hazard a guess not." Chuck smirked.
Serena groaned and her hand immediately flew towards Jenny's vodka-tonic, only to be stopped last minute and replaced by her own strictly non-alcoholic tonic water. "Accident?" She ventured as Dan gave her a reproving look.
"Uh huh."
Blair laughed and with a wink at Serena she slowly raised her own glass to her lips and took a tantalizing sip.
"I. Hate. You." Serena ground out.
"Don't worry sis," Eric smirked. "Only nine more months to go."
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"Remind me again why we're here?" Chuck muttered as they sat in the middle of the table. Serena and Dan had just broken the news in front of the Van der Woodson-Bass-Humphreys. Needless to say conversation was more then a little stilted.
"Because Serena is technically your sister and Lily likes to have you, and consequently me, over for family dinners." Blair said through gritted teeth. "Thanks for that by the way."
"No problem." He snarked back.
"So... How about that weather we've been having? Gotta love the sun." Eric tried.
Chuck stifled a snicker and Blair looked appalled. "You did not just use the weather as an ice-breaker."
"Hey did I mention that an associate of Stefano Gabbana called me last week?" Jenny asked, "Apparently he's seen my work and wants to offer me a job for when I finish college. Isn't that amazing?"
"Riveting." Blair said dryly.
"Blair," Serena warned. "Play nice."
"I- I don't understand..." Lily said finally. "How could this have happened?"
Chuck smirked and opened his mouth, "Lily, when a man and a woman-"
"Chuck!" Serena gasped. "Shut up!"
"Dad, say something." Dan urged pleadingly.
Rufus sat in shock, "What can I say?" Rufus shrugged emptily, "You two made a decision and now you are living with the consequences."
"I'd hardly call our unborn grandchild a consequence Rufus," Lily snapped at her husband.
"Well what do you expect me to do?" Rufus retorted, "Throw a ticker tape parade? Invite all our friends and family to gush over the fact that our unmarried, just-out-of-college children are going to have a child themselves?" Rufus stood up and brought his plate to the sink with a loud clatter.
"I always thought it would be Jenny first." Eric mused.
"Excuse me?" Jenny's eyes widened.
"He just called you a slut," Blair supplied.
"Stay out of this Waldorf." Dan demanded.
"Oh chill out, Humphrey." Chuck rolled his eyes.
"Everybody quiet!" Lily raised her voice and the room fell silent. Lily then glared pointedly at Eric until he took his headphones out of his ears and turned the volume on his music player down from maximum to minimum. When she was certain she had everyone's attention she then took a deep breath and began, "Serena, Dan, both of you know that I am in full support of anything that you decide to do, be it marriage or not, and I'm sure that Rufus agrees."
Rufus let out a snort before reluctantly nodding. "However, should you decide to get married. It would be of monumental help to me if you did so before the baby is born. Lord knows I don't want to listen to Cece's moaning more then is strictly necessary." Lily sighed.
"Well," Dan said hesitantly, taking Serena's hand in his. "We were thinking of maybe having a small registry office get together..."
Blair choked on her her drink, "WHAT!" She exclaimed when she finally got her breath back.
"Registry Office." Serena repeated firmly as Lily tried to surreptitiously fan herself with her napkin.
"Mother is going to have an aneurysm." She muttered, smiling faintly as Eric -her favorite child- patted her consolingly on the back.
Blair fixed her best friend with a stony glare. "If you think that I am stepping foot in some crappy public chapel you have another thing coming."
"That's one person off the guest list then," Rufus smiled, considerably more cheerful.
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"I thought the point of having a low-key wedding, was to have it low-key." Vanessa said disparagingly, as Lily marched them into the top bridal shop on Madison Avenue.
Blair snorted as the shop assistant hurried over to help.
"We need a bridal gown, and three bridesmaid dresses." Lily said brusquely. "Oh, and something to make the mother of the bride look more like the sister of the bride."
The assistant simpered happily. "Now, who is the blushing bride?" Her eyes skimmed over Lily, Serena, Blair and Jenny who were all impeccably dressed, before finally resting on Vanessa, who was currently dressed in a neon orange pinafore with bright pink combat boots and was turning her nose up at wads of white chiffon. "First timer?" She asked sympathetically.
"Think pretty woman," Blair advised before wincing as Vanessa knocked over a hat stand. "Or Miss Congeniality."
"Miss Congeniality it is," The assistant nodded sagely.
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"Tell me again why we didn't just get Blair's mom or Jenny to do the dresses?" Vanessa asked as they perused the shelves a few minutes later. "I mean have you seen the price of some of these?"
"Eleanor and Cyrus are on their second honeymoon and I wouldn't have enough time to do all of these from scratch." Jenny told her. "Plus there's the tuxes."
"Don't worry, Charles has already ordered those in from Paris." Lily said, "I thought it best to let him take care of things seeing as he is the most fashion conscious of all of us."
Serena giggled and Blair smiled fondly.
"Holy Crap!" Vanessa held up one of the price tags and her mouth gaped open.
"Hey V, you're in the wrong section." Serena called from across the room, "That's the returns pile."
"I'm in Hell." Vanessa groaned.
"I'm in Heaven!" Jenny squealed, eagerly picking a lavender dress off of the rack.
"Do you know how many children you could feed with the value of this dress alone?" Vanessa held up a plain pink bridesmaid dress.
Blair let out a sigh of frustration. "If I call my accountant and get him to donate a few thousand to 'Save the Whales' or something equally as idiotic, will you please shut up?"
"I really need to get me a billionaire." Jenny sighed wistfully as she replaced the dress and listened to Blair and Vanessa bickering over the 'value of a dollar'.
