Days 6 and 7: Reincarnation AU & Happy Birthday, Annie

A very special thank you to ackermission on tumblr for being incredibly sweet and supportive and saving this fic from being sent into the bin.

Annie woke up with a jolt, frantically looking around, searching for a threat that wasn't there. Her room was as quiet and empty as ever, safe for the young calico cat meowing at her from the foot of the bed, unhappy at being woken up so rudely.

Annie heaved out a sigh, leaning over to pet her kitten in apology. She didn't even know why she felt this panicked. Probably just another nightmare she couldn't remember since those were a regular occurrence for her. More so the older she got.

When she was a kid, she always dreamt happy dreams. Dreams that made her smile in the morning when she woke up and left her giddy for the rest of the day. But after she entered middle school, those dreams changed. More often than not, she woke up drenched in cold sweat, sometimes screaming for god knows what reason. She supposed she should be glad she never remembered them.

Now at age 20, she was used to it. Or resigned, more like. She had made peace with the fact that she would always be plagued with nightmares of things she had no idea about, only suspected involved her friends dying. A conclusion she had made from her first instinct upon waking up which was to grab her phone and text every single one of her friends to see if they were okay.

If they were alive.

Once when they were in high school, she even had a panic attack because one of her closest friends, Berthold didn't answer any of her calls or messages for three days. She was absolutely convinced he was dead.

Turned out his family went out of town visit a family member for the week and he forgot his phone at home.

Annie didn't understand this irrational fear, nor the terrors she apparently saw at night. She didn't understand it and hated it with a passion.

Letting go of one last deep breath, Annie finally got up to get breakfast, automatically picking up her phone on the way. She had stopped spamming her friends every morning long ago but she had never gotten rid of the anxiety. And so, now she made it a habit to check all of their social media before breakfast instead. It worked well most of the time since some of them, like Eren, Jean, or Reiner, were obsessed with Instagram and had to post a selfie or two every day as soon as they woke up. Sometimes, Annie even got a laugh out of it when Eren managed to coax his grumpy boyfriend into the picture as well. The unhappy faces Levi could make were simply amazing, in Annie's opinion.

Lighting up the screen on her way to the kitchen, Annie had to blink at the barrage of notifications she had today. Frowning in confusion, she first clicked on the group chat where she had 35 unread messages, and immediately had to smile. She had completely forgotten what day it was today but apparently, her friends didn't.

"Happy birthday Annie!"

"Here's to me finally beating you at the gym this next year! Happy Birthday!"

"Hope you didn't forget about the party today cause we're gonna get SMASHED!"

"Finally 21! How does it feel, legal adult?"

The messages went on and on and Annie felt like crying. Somehow, she felt like she didn't deserve all this attention and love. A feeling of ungrounded guilt nagged at her but she couldn't tell why. She attributed it to just having woken up from another nightmare as she was usually overwhelmed with emotions she felt like they weren't hers for a few hours after those.

For now, she only closed the group chat to open another, private one.

"Good morning, Beautiful 3 Happy birthday! Hope you're looking forward to today."

Warmth spread from Annie's chest all the way to her fingertips. She claimed she didn't care for them but Armin's pet names and good morning messages always made her feel so happy.

She turned on the coffee maker as she typed her response, wondering all the while exactly what her friends and boyfriend had been planning for today.

They knew she hated surprise parties, so it probably wouldn't be anything too over the top. And still, Annie wanted to claim she wasn't looking forward to it. That she hated parties in general, that she hated being the centre of attention, but... she knew it would be a lie.

She loved her friends and even though she sometimes felt like she didn't deserve them, she basked in the love they gave her back. Or maybe it was exactly because of that feeling.

Surviving her classes that day was that much easier than it normally was for Annie, with all the additional birthday wishes she kept receiving. Every time she met one of her friends for a shared lecture, they jumped at her and showered her with love. Annie scoffed every time, saying not to make a big deal out of it but she still couldn't keep the smile away. Especially when Sasha approached her with a guilty look on her face, admitting that she made birthday cookies for her to munch at throughout the day, but then couldn't resist and ate them herself. Annie actually laughed at that, couldn't hold back the sound if she wanted to.

By the time evening came, Annie was already thinking that this was possibly the best birthday she'd ever had. And there was still that party to be had.

When her phone dinged with an incoming message, indicating Armin was there to pick her up, she shot one last look in the mirror as she threw her coat over her shoulders. Usually, when she looked at herself, she felt cold. Her eyes especially always seemed so cold and distant to her. But today... Right then, for some reason, she felt warm looking into them in the reflection. And it was then she noticed she was smiling slightly.

And then she realized how happy she was in that moment. Briefly remembering the way she woke up, she had to laugh at the contrast.

That morning, she only felt fear.

Fear and guilt and dread.

And so much regret.

However, those emotions were mostly forgotten now, all the birthday wishes she had received and screenshotted carefully emitting warmth and calmness from her phone and into her heart. She couldn't believe how lucky she was.

Shaking her head at the silly, sentimental thoughts Annie grabbed her keys and left her apartment, calling goodbye to her cat, who ignored her in favour of staring out the window with concentration.

Arriving to Sasha and Connie's apartment with Armin, Annie felt a bit nervous. She wasn't sure why, it wasn't like this would be the first party her friends threw that she attended, but somehow, she still couldn't get rid of the remnants of the anxiety she had felt that morning.

"Are you okay?" Armin asked when they stopped in front of the door leading into the apartment, squeezing Annie's hand in concern.

Annie jumped at the question, pulled out of her thoughts without warning. She looked at Armin, blinking a few times. "No, I'm okay, just. I'm not sure what to expect," Annie said quietly, vaguely, not understanding her own thoughts enough to explain herself properly.

Armin smiled gently at her, leaning down to give her a light kiss. "It's going to be okay. Even Sasha and Connie know not to go overboard when it's about you."

Annie smiled back, thinking to herself that she might not really mind if they actually did go overboard. Shaking her head, she gestured for her boyfriend that she was ready.

Squeezing her hand one last time, Armin reached out to ring the doorbell and immediately, the door opened only for them both to be showered by loud cheers and screams of "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

Annie instinctively took a step back at the sudden noise but after overcoming the initial shock, she started chuckling, letting Connie and Armin drag her inside and into the centre of it all.

However, as soon as Annie stepped inside the tiny, overcrowded living room, she froze. For a second, she felt like she was in another time and place; the cake on the table became smaller, some people seemingly disappeared completely, while others transformed into different versions of themselves.

Eren and Jean now had longer hair while Mikasa's became shorter. Reiner even grew a beard in a split second.

Everybody's clothes changed as well, all of them dressed in a similar way as if it was some kind of uniform.

Only the smiles and the hand interlocked with hers stayed the same. As did the banner saying "Happy 21st birthday, Annie!" hanging from the ceiling.

Blinking a few times, the image disappeared as abruptly as it appeared and Annie suddenly felt incredibly weak. Did she just experience some kind of flashback? She didn't understand what happened but it felt like a hard punch to her gut.

She noticed the smiles on her friends' faces turn into concerned frowns. And in that moment, she realized she was crying.

"Annie, are you okay?" came Armin's concerned voice right before his hand came to rest gently on her cheek.

Annie let out a choked laugh, closing her eyes and revelling in the unexplainable feeling of overwhelming relief she felt right then.

"Yeah, I'm just... really happy."

The words sounded like an echo to her ears, like she had said them before.

And maybe... maybe she really did say them once already, sometime long, long ago.