Together Forever

Chapter 4

Realization

As I closed my eyes, I could feel the wind hit my face. It was nice, brisk breeze rushing by. I had no care in the world. My time was coming to an end anyway. However, there was one thing that was running through my mind and it was Honoka.

Kousaka Honoka. I could never forget you. You were so cute and so cheerful. You had all of the qualities that I could never have. You brought joy and excitement to my life and even if I couldn't say goodbye to you now, I know that you're smiling. Wherever you are, whoever you're with; I know that you'll be happy. That was my one mistake. You always made me happy, but I always fell short in giving you that same love. In my heart, I loved you more than anything else in this entire world, but on the outside, I just couldn't bring myself to show it.

Why? What caused me to hold back? Was that the reason for this change in events? Was my own conviction not strong enough to be with you for the rest of time?

I'm sorry… I know now that all of this is my fault. Hopefully, I'll be able to see you soon.

As my descent continued, I could feel a warmth I've never felt before. Then, a bright light appeared in front of me. I reached out with both hands and grabbed ahold of it. I was here.

I was where I needed to be.

…

"Stop!"

My eyes shot open as a voice came from behind me. I was so confused and startled at the same time. The sound of that voice nearly caused me to fall, but I grabbed ahold of the railing once more and turned around.

"What are you doing?"

It was that girl from the hallway. I couldn't remember her name so I just remained quiet. I slowly averted my eyes from her until they were back looking at the ground below me.

"I don't know you very well. I don't know what's been going on in your life, but this is not the thing you want to do, trust me."

I could hear her voice getting closer which finally forced me to speak up.

"Please don't get any closer to me. I've made my choice. Nothing you can say will change that decision."

"Okay, that's fine. If you could just hear me out… You can't do this. You're still so young. Don't you want to see more of the world? Don't you want to see what your life will become? You can't do any of those things if you end it here."

Her words were getting to me. Tears were starting to form in my eyes.

"None of that matters if I can't be happy."

"Of course you can be happy. What are some things that you like?"

"Honoka." I couldn't hold it in any more. I had to speak her name once again, but it was the truth. Although she's broken my heart, she still makes me happy. All of those memories from the past are still with me and they mean so much to me. That's why all of this was right. If I could rid myself of this pain, I'd be able to only think about the happy things.

"Okay. There's other stuff you like, right? What are other things that make you happy?"

"Sweets?" This was also true, but I was starting to question everything. Why was this girl going so far as to stop me? I don't didn't her and she didn't know me.

"Really? I love sweets too. Do you have a favorite?"

"Um… Cheesecake."

"Aw, cheesecake is good. It's really cool how there's a lot of flavors to choose from. You don't have to stick with one. If you're feeling a certain way, you can choose something entirely out of the blue."

"Yeah… That's true." Suddenly, my hands gripped the railing even tighter than before. unconsciously, it felt as if I didn't want to jump anymore.

"My favorite is manjuu. There's just something about them that I just can't get away from. I guess you could call it my guilty pleasure. I only eat it when I can't resist the urge anymore. Haha, I'm such a sucker when it comes to manjuu."

At that moment, there was a pause within our conversation. I wasn't thinking of anything and she wasn't even saying anything to me. However, this silence only made me more scared of jumping. I turned around and looked at the girl. She had her eyes right on me as if I was about to go somewhere beyond her reach.

"I-I'm scared."

"I know. It's totally alright to be scared. I'm right here for you. I'm not going anywhere."

"I don't want to be on this ledge anymore."

"Would you like a hand?"

"I couldn't muster the words. I just nodded my head. That's when she stuck her hand out to me. I looked up and saw her smiling. It was such a bright smile that it kind of made me smile back at her. Then, I took her hand and she helped me climb over the railing and back to safety. My body was in complete ruins that I collapsed onto my knees and then onto my butt. Tears were rolling down my face. "Aaahhhhh!" I let out a cry of pain. Nothing made sense to me anymore.

"It's okay. I'm right here. Let it out."

She suddenly wrapped her arms around my body and pulled me in for a hug. At that moment, I was so demoralized that I didn't really know what was happening. Eventually, my legs gave out and the two of us sat on the ground. We were sitting there for the longest time because I just couldn't bring myself to stop crying. I was thinking about everything all at once and why I was so messed up. All the while, this girl was keeping my company. She held me close and made me feel like I meant something to her.

A few more hours went by and I was finally able to recollect myself. I pushed myself off of her body, wiped my eyes clear of any remaining tears, and looked her right in the eyes.

"I'm sorry, but I forgot your name."

"Haha, it's alright. Sonoda Umi, and you're Minami Kotori, right?"

"Uh huh."

"Minami-san."

"You can just call me Kotori."

"Kotori… That's such a cute name. Well, school is pretty much over. Would you like me to walk you home?"

"S-Sure."

The two of us slowly returned to our feet and walked down to the exit of the school. Unfortunately, being with this girl, it attracted a lot of unwanted attention. Many of the girls who saw us walking together started talking to each other with dirty looks. This only meant that they were talking bad about me. I tried my best to ignore it, but I knew there was nothing I could do. I was the new girl with the most popular girl in school so it was obvious that I'd be getting a bad rep.

Once we made it off campus, I was able to relax a little more. However, as we continued to walk to my house, there was something that was bothering me about the whole thing. I couldn't keep in any more so I decided to ask her.

"So… How did you know I was up there?"

"To be honest, I didn't… I was asked to get some equipment from the roof and when I got there, it was locked so I got the key. When I opened it up, I saw you on the ledge and everything just stopped. I forgot everything that I was supposed to do and just focused on you."

"Well… Thank you. I told myself that that was the best and easiest thing to do, but in the back of my head, I was wishing that someone would come try and talk me out of it."

"I'm just glad that you're here now. I know your parents would be devastated if they found out about that kind of news."

"Yeah." Our conversation eventually faded as we reached my house. "Thank you again, for walking me home."

"It's no problem. If you ever need anything, feel free to call me or something. Do you have a cell phone?"

"Yeah."

"Let's exchange numbers."

At that moment, we pulled out our phones and went through the process.

"There. Now, if there's anything you need or want to talk about, I'll be right here. Consider me one of your friends now."

"Okay." I couldn't but smile a bit at that comment. I didn't realize until now, but I haven't really made any friends ever since transferring to this new school. Another good thing about this was that she seemed really friendly and genuine.

"Well, I should get home or else my parents are going to wonder where I am. I'll see you school. Bye."

"Bye." We waved goodbye to each other until we lost sight of each other. After that, I turned to the front door and walked in. My parents were already home preparing dinner. However, I decided to silently walk in and head to my room. There was no way I could tell them about what happened. They'd punish me for sure. For all I knew, there was only one person I could talk to, and I didn't even know her that much.

End of Chapter 4