Together Forever

Chapter 5

To Be a Friend

I called her up and nervously held onto my phone. I only needed to wait a few seconds before a voice could be heard from the other end.

"Hello?"

"Hi, this is Kotori. Is this Sonoda-san?"

"Yeah it is. I wasn't expecting you to call so soon. Is everything okay?"

"Not really. I just really needed someone to talk to."

"Perfect. I'm all ears."

"Well, I feel that I should thank you again for stopping me. I don't know why I did that. It was really stupid of me to think like that."

"It's alright. Your reasons are justifiable."

"But now I'm scared everything. I haven't brought it up to my parents. I'm too afraid that they might think horribly about me or put in some kind of program to help fix my brain. I don't want that. I don't think nothing's wrong with me. It's just that I'm so confused about everything. What should I do?"

"Just stay calm. There's no need to rush anything. You need to understand yourself first before trying to burden anyone else."

"But doesn't that mean I've already brought you into my problem?"

"That doesn't matter. Friends are always there for each other. I already told you that if you need anything, I'll be there for you."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. This girl was refusing to back down from her previous promise. How could she be so dedicated to me when we didn't even know each other? I know that everyone's different, but I didn't know that people could be selfless, and this girl was starting to illuminate that idea. She's only cared about me. I can't recall her ever bringing her own life into our conversations, and if she did, there was probably a reason for it.

"So I should just keep quiet about the whole thing?"

"I wouldn't think of it like that. More like… Reflect on the good that came out of choosing to live on. It may not seem like there's anything good to think about, I can promise you that there will be goodness in the future. That's why we all look forward and not behind us."

"Hm… okay. Thank you for listening."

"No problem at all. Is there anything else that's bothering you?"

"No, I think I'm fine for now."

"Hey, if you want, I can walk to school with you if that'll ease the burden."

"That actually sounds like a good idea. Thank you."

"Your welcome. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay. Bye."

I let her voice be the last thing I hear before hanging up. Even though it was a simple phone call, I could feel a slight sense of relief. I knew there was still a lot left for me to deal with. It just made things better knowing that this girl wouldn't desert me. I need her… I don't care if we're strangers to each other. She could definitely help me return to normal because I know that I'm not the person I used to be. I want to be Minami Kotori and this person I am right now is not her.

After everything settled down, I laid on my bed and closed my eyes. Only a few seconds went by before I felt my body drift into dreamland. Unfortunately, my dream is filled with blurry, black dust with nothing in sight.

…

When my alarm went off the next morning, I was a little sluggish in getting out of bed. I walked over to the mirror in my room and got a good look at myself. My face was still a little swollen from all of the wear of tear I've experienced, but I tried to get over it. I slapped my cheeks and shook my head vigorously. It was a new day and I had to treat it that way.

Once I was ready, I headed out the door to see Sonoda-san waiting just outside the gate. We greeted each other with a friendly good morning and headed to school. Unfortunately, we didn't really talk much. For some reason, I was still a little hesitant in talking with her about my problem. However, just being with her made it seem like I didn't have a problem at all.

When we got to school, a lot of eyes were pulled towards us. I could tell that none of the girls liked what they were seeing. I could even hear some of them talking about why I was with the prince of the school. I just bowed my head in shame. I just got lucky in exposing my most vulnerable self to her and she's just a good enough human to put me ahead of her. In realizing this truth, I broke away from me. She called out to me, but I didn't answer. I weaved through the crowd of people until I found myself in the bathroom. I found an open stall and shut myself inside.

Who does that girl think she is? What a gold digger? The prince is probably just being nice. There's no way the prince has fallen for that chick. Just look at her, she looks awful. Yeah she does.

There were so many voices going through my head.

I was being ostracized. The one unobtainable girl was spending time with me and this was causing people to think poorly about me. It just wasn't fair. I didn't ask for any of this. It just happened.

That's when I slammed my hands against my head and shut my eyes as tight as I could. There was just no escape for me. Sonoda-san tells me to think about the good that will come of all of this, but I can't see it. I don't see how any good could come out of any of this. Suffering like this unbearable. Why am I the only one going through something like this?

Bang! Bang! At that moment, the door to the stall I was in erupted with sound. I calmly opened it up and saw a group of girls just outside of it.

"H-Hi. Can I help you?"

"You're that girl who's been hanging around the prince, huh?"

"Y-Yes." For some reason, tremors were running throughout my entire body as they continued to look at me with daggers for eyes.

"Get out of here."

Without even thinking, I get up and exit the stall. Out of nowhere, they grabbed me by the shoulders and threw into the wall. I hit it hard and fell to the floor. Now, even more tremors were running through my body.

"Why," I asked softly.

"What'd you say?!"

This time, I was only able to mouth the question because the words just wouldn't leave me mind. Fear was taking over my entire system.

"Here's to make sure that you stay away from our prince."

As I looked up, I saw one girl clench her hand into a fist which only meant one thing. I closed my eyes and braced for the hit. However, the hit never came. Instead, I heard a gasp come from the girls right above. That's when I opened my eyes to see Sonoda-san behind them with her hand holding that girl's fist.

"What is going on here?"

"Nothing. Sonoda-san. She just fell and we were trying to help her up."

"So it seems. If I ever catch you alone with her again, you'd best hope you're not alone."

At that moment, the group of girls ran out of the restroom in a hurry. Meanwhile, Sonoda-san knelt down in front of me to check me over.

"Are you okay?"

"I-I… I…" I was shaking uncontrollably. My mind nor my body was responding to anything from the outside world.

"Let's get you to the nurse's office."

Sonoda-san suddenly cradled me in her arms and escorted me to the nurse's office. On the way there, I tried avoiding eye contact with everything around me, but there was one thing that I just so happened to catch. It was Honoka and that girl from that idol group having a little love session. That's when I closed my eyes, hoping to stop the tears from escaping my eyes.

Once we got to the office, she set me down on the bed and went looking for the nurse. Meanwhile, I sat there on the bed with nothing at all. I was weak. I was broken, and I knew that there are certain things in this world that cannot be mended. I was one of those things. I turned my head and saw a fountain pen sitting on the desk right next to my bed. I grabbed it and put it right in front of my face. The tip was nice and sharp. I looked around and saw that no one was around. That's when I took a deep breath and lowered it towards my left forearm. I gripped it tightly with my right hand and slowly pressed it into my skin until blood started to erupt from the wound.

It hurt unlike anything else, but it also felt comforting. It was almost as if I needed to do this. I pressed the pen further into my skin as more blood starting to escape my body. I gritted my teeth in order to fight the pain. Unlike the pain I've been experiencing this past day, I knew that this pain would only last a few seconds. I started to press even harder when the door to the room slammed open.

"What are you doing?!"

I knew that that was Sonoda-san's voice. All I could do was shed the remaining tears I had.

"I'm sorry," I said softly.

She suddenly rushed to my side and tried to separating me from the pen. I fought back though. She kept telling me to stop, but I kept yelling at her that I needed to do this. Unfortunately, she was stronger than me. She grabbed the pen and threw it across the room. she then grabbed a nearby towel and pressed it against my forearm as hard as she could.

"What were you thinking?! This isn't a joke!"

I couldn't answer her. I just sat there with a blank look on my face as she did her best to stop the bleeding.

"You have to keep on living. I know it seems hard, but there is a reason why you're alive now… Please don't leave. I… I need you."

End of Chapter 5