A/N: I own nothing, save for my small collection of words and phrases. The characters and settings belong to JKR and those who helped bring it all to life (publishing companies and movie studios, etc.), while the song on which I've loosely based the story belongs to Christina Perri and her recording company (Jar of Hearts).
This is un-betaed, so any mistakes are my own. If you see one, please let me know.
Four years passed, filled with explosive arguments, heated sex, and a further dimming of the lights in Hermione's soul. As time went on, she found it increasingly difficult to sleep when he wasn't there with her, and in trying desperately to avoid the nightmares, she began resorting to Dreamless Sleep more and more often, brewing it herself to avoid the quantity restrictions at the Apothecary. She would pick up a few ingredients here and a few there so nobody became suspicious that she was brewing such an addictive potion.
She thought she was completely in control, but then most addicts do. It did allow her a brief respite from the misery in her life, but the longer she took them, the more she couldn't sleep without them – or without Lucius – and the more strung out she grew, leading to more and more questionable choices in other areas of her life.
He had been with others at least four or five times a year in that time, and once a year, to fill that itch and show him how it felt, she sought out another to do the same. After Nadia that first time, Hermione's next target was Lucius' secretary, because she knew that the woman having that sort of knowledge of herself was something that would torture Lucius for months afterward, and she did it out of pure spite.
It was after that she saw the positive effect that her actions had wrought. In his possessiveness, after she admitted to him what she'd done yet again, and with whom, he set aside everyone except her, and he was more passionate and giving in bed for months. Inevitably, someone else caught his eye and he was off again, but that time immediately following her assignation with his secretary was as magical as the beginning of their relationship had been, and during that time, she was able to set the Dreamless Sleep aside.
The second year, she'd allowed herself to have a brief fling with George Weasley that only lasted a couple of weeks. While the time with him dimmed a few more of her own lights, it seemed to revitalize the remaining Weasley twin, brightening several of his and allowing him to finally start moving on from Fred's death. Not long afterward, Hermione received a wedding invitation from Molly for George and Angelina Johnson, who had been in love with him for years.
The third year saw many changes in Hermione's social circle. Ron ran off with Parvati Patil, much to the surprise of everyone involved, including Padma, who he had been dating before the elopement. Harry and Ginny, who had been married around the time Hermione and Lucius' arrangement had begun, finally had their first child, a boy with the looks of his father but the brown eyes of his mother, who they named James Sirius after Harry's two fathers. Luna was seen out with several people, but seemed disinclined to settle down yet.
Draco married Astoria Greengrass that summer, and Hermione was, of course, not invited to the festivities. He'd apologized to her, she'd accepted his apologies, and although she had good social standing due to her role in the war, the fact that she was fucking his father regularly was too much for Draco. It didn't matter that his mother knew about the relationship; a good pureblood simply didn't invite his father's mistress to his nuptials. Hermione pretended it didn't hurt, but for some reason, it did.
In the aftermath of Ron's surprising elopement, a drunk Hermione ran into Padma the night of Draco's wedding, and in their shared misery, Padma became her fling for that year. She'd lasted a whole month before calling it quits, not wanting to keep getting between Hermione and Lucius.
In her fourth year of full employment, Neville Longbottom shocked the Wizarding world by marrying Hannah Abbott, who had just recently bought the Leaky Cauldron from old Tom. He had long been Apprenticing at Hogwarts in preparation to take over the Herbology post in several years, and was the first Professor to be married and live off-grounds in decades. Flitwick and Sprout were married, of course, but both lived on-site.
Just a couple of weeks before her contract was to end, she was scouting out who that year's partner would be when she had the perfect idea. It would hit him directly in the gut like a sucker-punch, and a twisted, evil little smile began spreading over her lips. And if history was any indication, afterward, she would be the sole recipient of his attentions for a while, which always made her happy even as more lights flicked off at her methods.
Master Ashmole sat down with her over lunch one day and asked if she was considering renewing her contract with ML or if she was interested in leaving to find employment elsewhere.
She took a bite of her sandwich, chewing as she thought carefully. "I don't know, Glenn. I don't dislike the work here, but I can't say that I truly enjoy it anymore, either. Why?"
"I think, my dear, that you would do well to leave this place behind, and to leave Lucius as well."
"There's nothing…"
He cut in, his tone rife with exasperation, "Hermione, nobody here is quite as stupid as you both seem to think we all are. We've seen you dancing around each other since you started, and I've watched you shrink and shrivel and fade away until a good stiff breeze could blow you away, all while he seems to grow stronger and more vibrant than ever. You're feeding him yourself on a silver platter, and it needs to stop."
Her sandwich plopped back down onto her plate, trembling fingers unable to hold it up any longer.
"But… where could I go? If I left…where could I go that he couldn't get to me if he wanted? He won't want to let me go, Glenn, and … I don't know if I'd want to leave if he tried to stop me."
"Well, see," he continued, eyes downcast and fingers playing with the edge of his paper napkin, "that's just it. I've heard of a position coming open that would suit you perfectly, and it's not somewhere he can easily get to. It would be a safe place for you to recover, good work, and a shot at happiness if you can get away from him for good."
Her voice was barely a whisper. "Is there such a place? Does it really exist?"
"Oh, yes."
"Where?"
"Hogwarts. Septima's retiring and I heard from her that they're having a devil of a time trying to find a suitable replacement. You have an in with Headmistress McGonagall, as well as with most of the staff, and I truly believe you would flourish there, teaching the young ones all the stores of knowledge you've been given."
Her lips formed the words, but there was no sound available. "Hogwarts."
She ran on auto-pilot the rest of the day, and when she got home, she immediately sat down to write to McGonagall to ask about the position, setting aside her plans to seduce Narcissa.
To say she was surprised to receive an owl from Hermione Granger was an understatement of epic proportions. Minerva McGonagall had been searching furiously for a Master or Mistress of Arithmancy to take on the position for months, but had heard nothing about anyone looking for work. It was frustrating, and worse than Hogwarts' previous staffing challenge, Defense, because there was no jinx on the position to blame, only a generation of students who weren't thrilled by the subject and didn't pursue Masteries in it – or even NEWTs.
So when the sharp-beaked Eagle Owl soared into her office one morning bearing a letter from Hermione Granger, inquiring about the open position, Minerva's heart leapt with joy and anticipation.
Miss Granger had always been one of her favorite students, even amongst the nightmares that she and Mr. Potter had faced over the course of their educations. She had been pleased when the request had come for Hermione to complete her education, but when the special circumstances of the independent study program had been made clear, she had wept hot tears of sorrow. That someone who was so like Minerva had been in her own youth had been driven to the point of not being able to be around people in a traditional classroom setting was a travesty, and one more crime she laid at the dead feet of Voldemort. Hogwarts was supposed to be a safe-house; a home for those who had none other. Yes, it was an institute of learning, but there were far too many children being raised in unsuitable environments, and they all found a refuge in the hallowed halls of the castle.
She had heard rumors about Hermione in the years since she'd left school, had heard about her employment at the prestigious Malfoy Laboratories, and about this supposed affair she was having with Lucius Malfoy, but hadn't believed a word of the latter, thinking it the idle gossip bound to attach itself to any reasonably attractive female who worked for the former Death Eater. Minerva hadn't heard from her personally, and had only seen her once or twice at Ministry functions where they trotted out the Golden Trio like a giant trophy. They hadn't spoken, however, both busy making the necessary rounds of the room, speaking with those who needed a word or two before leaving quietly.
According to the letter she'd received, Hermione had achieved her Mastery in two years of work and study, and had put in an additional four years with ML, working with Glenn Ashmole, who was known to be one of the best Masters of his field, even amongst those, like Minerva, who had other specialties.
Having taught Hermione herself for six years, she could well believe every accolade awarded to the younger woman, and so with no reservations whatsoever, she immediately penned a reply in her signature green ink, asking Hermione to come for an in-person interview. She didn't need to interview her, really, but it was a necessary step in the hiring process, and one to which Minerva must adhere if the employment contracts were to be approved by the Board of Governors.
A/N: Well, that's it for now. There's a portion of one more scene written, but it's unfinished and this was the last good place to leave off before that scene. I make no promises on when more will come, as She Who Turns Time is still my main focus, but now that we're beginning to leave Lucius behind and move toward Minerva, enough reviews may spark my muse and force me to face up to this little gem from my writing past. There will likely be a shift in writing style if more ever happens, as I've grown and changed since I started this story, but where I don't promise when anything new for this will be posted, neither do I promise that nothing more will ever be written for it. I really do want to finish this at some point.
Now... to see about getting back to SWTT and perhaps start posting another of my hidden WIPs while I work.
Reviews are always welcome.