A/N: Hey guys! How are you all doing? I am almost done with this semester of college and I am so psyched to get out of here. I'm mostly ready to be done with work.
I wanted to give a shout out to my beta, Scared of Scars. Also FF was doing weird things last week and it didn't send emails when I posted and didn't say that I updated it, so if you haven't read chapter 15 and 16 please go back and read them.
Please enjoy!
Clary felt nerves settle into her stomach, as her ceremony approached. Half the clan would be there watching her while she only wore a skirt and paint before drinking a cup of who knows what. She was anxious about the whole ordeal, but she had to get through it. It was only for a night.
She stood stiffly, while an older woman painted her skin. The white paint was ashy on her skin, making her look even paler then she used to be. Her torso and arms were covered, and she groaned disgustedly. The woman dipped a brush into black paint, as she began to paint runes across her skin. She traced over her marriage tattoos before adding more across her stomach and back.
"I don't want to do this." She muttered to herself, shifting awkwardly.
"I didn't want to do it either." Imogen rasped, trailing a mark over her shoulder.
"You've done this ritual?" She asked, wondering who this woman was.
"Yes, it was very long ago. I'm Stephen's mother, of course I have." She explained softly, locking her eyes with her granddaughter-in-law.
"Right that makes sense." She said without thinking. Clary gritted her teeth at herself, knowing that she probably sounded incredibly selfish.
"I have been ill and weak. The heat is hard on an old woman's bones, but I was young once." She hummed, walking around her. "I did want to be here for this though because I know I was rather scared myself when I did this ceremony." She mused with a faint smile. "This ritual is an awkward one for the woman involved. Honestly, I'm the one that added the herb to get high." She snickered softly, adjusting her bottoms. "It's makes it easier to relax and do the dances."
"You are the reason I am going to get stoned?" Clary raised her eye brows at her, feeling slightly surprised.
"I thought it was better than doing it sober. Jonathan's mother was thankful for it. Now I feel like you are more nervous about the nudity rather than the dance and sex." She hummed, beginning to elaborately braid her hair.
"I don't care about the sex, but I do care about the dance and the whole breast out situation." Clary muttered, wanting to cross her arms over her non-existent chest.
"It isn't as bad as you think." She assured the young girl, pushing the elaborate braid over her shoulder. It was filled with beads and ribbons. She stroked her braid, looking at herself in the mirror. She really looked like one of the people now, and she wasn't sure if she liked it.
"Right." She muttered, taking a shaky breath.
OoOoO
The ritual was in a building on the outskirts of the clan. Compared to the rest of the structures, this one was wooden with elaborate carvings into the sides. It was painted with vibrant colors, making it stand out against the sand. She wanted to hold her chest, but she couldn't or else she would ruin the markings on her skin. She stepped inside, seeing that it was filled with people. She clinched her fist, squeezing her thighs together.
The people who got to witness this ceremony were people who were related to the Lord's family by blood and by marriage. There were a lot more people connected to the Herondale's than she thought, which added onto the nerves in her belly.
She gulped thickly, looking around the crowd. The chatter stopped, as all the attention focused on her. Imogen had walked ahead of her stepping into the middle of the crowd to pick up a cup. "Through the liquid in this glass the angel of the moon will bless my granddaughter with a son to carry on our lineage." She announced loudly, first taking a sip herself before gesturing for Clary to join her.
Drums started to pound, forcing her heart to stutter, as she stood next to Imogen. Her breath began to catch in her throat because of the eyes that were on her. She kept her head held high, trying not to make a complete fool of herself. She took the cup from her, glancing around the crowd nervously, as she down the liquid.
She glanced up at the sky, seeing a hole in the ceiling that let in the moons light. "Now, for the ceremonial dance." Imogen announced, as Clary's mind got fuzzy. She felt her head begin to spin when the drums started to beat a different, faster rhythm.
Clary took another deep breath, beginning to move her body to the music. Everything began to whirl around her, as she circled in different areas. Heat began to build in her stomach while her nerves began to slip away. She swayed her hips around, moving around the large space she had. She flailed her arms, stomping down onto the earth.
OoOoO
Clary wasn't sure where she was. Jace was holding her hand, leading her somewhere. His presences made her feel much better. Her throat was uncomfortably dry, while the moon still loomed over them. She released an exhausted breath, rubbing her hand over her face. Her limbs were sore, making it difficult to walk.
"How much further do we have to walk?" She muttered, slipping her hand from her husbands.
"Not much further." He assured her softly, glancing back at her.
"I feel like I have been hit by a train." She grumbled, putting her hands to her temples.
"Is the high gone?" He chuckled, reaching up to massage her neck with his hand. She groaned softly, leaning into him. She nodded silently, liking his warmth. It was freezing without the sun. "The water will help." He assured her, as they approached an opening of the cave.
"Did I make a fool of myself?" She asked, as Jace held his hand out to help her down the rough steps.
"No, you were quite amazing actually." He chuckled. His words were filled with so much admiration, which warmed her heart. They got further into the cave, while the light slowly filtered out. She felt like they were walking blind, but Jace seemed to know where they going. They turned a corner, and a pale blue light illumined the cave.
"Wow." She breathed, running her fingers along the wall. The dust came off on her fingers, making them glow ever so slightly. "What is this place?" She asked, hearing streaming water.
"I'm not really sure." Jace shrugged, playing with an escaped curl.
"It's beautiful." She breathed, turning around to face him.
"You're beautiful. I'm so proud of you." He whispered, cupping her cheek lightly.
"All I did was get high and dance." She snorted, snuggling her head into his hand.
"No, that's not what I'm proud about." He laughed, moving to tangle their hands together. "I'm proud that you stood up there with your head held high. I knew you were worried about that whole thing, but no one there would have known you were nervous." He smiled, kissing her hands lightly. "Let's get that paint off." He pulled her against him, making her smile faintly.
She slipped her bottoms off of her hips, while Jace did the same. He took her hands, leading her into the pool behind him. She sank down into the warm liquid, scrubbing the paint from her skin. The paint filled water, but it was quickly washed away by the faint current in the pond. Jace came up behind her, washing her back. She sighed happily, sinking into the water to wet her hair.
Jace dipped beneath the water, bursting out of the water in front of her. She flinched heavily, slapping his arm. He snickered to himself, drawing her small frame into his embrace. She inhaled deeply through her nose, as their mouths mingled together softly. She drew her legs around his waist, feeling cool stone against her back.
OoOoO
Clary groaned softly, rubbing at her face. She had no idea how she got back to her tent last night, but she woke up in her bed. She was sprawled against Jace's chest very unceremoniously, but she found herself to be quite comfortable. She propped herself up, seeing that Jace was already awake.
"Morning." He breathed, moving her hair away from her face.
"I am so tired." She muttered, sitting up.
"You should be. We haven't been back for very long." He explained, snuggling under the covers.
"How did I get home? I remember being in the cave, but nothing after that." She shook her head, curling back against his side.
"Well you fell asleep." He chuckled, playing with her hair. "like half way through the night." He snickered, kissing her forehead.
"I did." She winced, looking up at him, as her cheeks turned pink.
"Yes, it was very funny." He snorted, trailing his fingers along her back.
"That's so embarrassing." She giggled, shaking her head.
She felt her stomach coil, making her shift uncomfortable. She ran her hand over her belly, gulping thickly. "Are you alright?" Jace rubbed her back, kissing her skin.
"I'm just a little nauseous." She inhaled a calming breath. "It's been getting worse the last few days." She pressed her fingers into her abdomen, worrying that morning sickness was on the way. The first three months of her pregnancy, she had miraculously avoided morning sickness. "I need a bucket." She clapped her hand to her mouth, feeling her stomach churn.
"Oh," Jace's eyes widened, as he got to his feet.
"Now," she exclaimed, gulping down the bile rising up her throat. Her husband flew out of the tent, while she tried to keep herself from vomiting all over their home. He barely brought the bucket into the tent before she blew chunks. She held the bucket tightly, coughing violently, as she threw up. Jace pulled her hair away from her face.
OoOoO
Isabelle had taken over sick Clary after Jace had to leave. Clary felt like garbage, and she groaned loudly. She ran her fingers through her hair, lying back against her bed. She was covered in sweat from dry heaving for a solid hour. She whipped the sweat from her face, looking over at her friend.
"Are you feeling better?" Isabelle asked, tying her hair back.
"Yes," She nodded, rubbing her stomach.
"Jace and Stephen want to talk to you when you are ready."
"Let's go now before I decide to throw up again." She muttered, pushing herself up into a sitting positon. "Carry me." She whimpered, holding out her arms. Isabelle rolled her eyes teasingly, lifting her up. Jace and Stephen were talking in their tent, and their conversation paused when they entered.
"You alright?" Jace got to his feet, as Isabelle set her down.
"I'll be fine. I just need a distraction." She assured her husband, as he led her to a chair. "So, what did we need to talk about?" She asked, talking a glass of water from her husband.
"As you know, we have been planning for the rebellion, and we are leaving to go to the castle in 3 months." Stephen explained, leaning back in his chair.
"Wow, that is really soon." She gulped thickly, not realizing that this would be happening so soon.
"We have been preparing for a while, but we need a few things from you." Stephen clasping his hands together, as he looked over her.
"Sure, how can I help?" She stammered, adjusting awkwardly in her seat.
"We need you to help train about 50 men how to behave like guards at the palace. Our men aren't trained to behave like them, but you lived with them all your life. You know how they act." He described, getting to his feet.
"Of course, I will need to make leather tops for the men to resemble armor, so I will need help with that." She offered, running her fingers through her hair. "Is there anything else?" She asked, clearing her throat.
"A layout of the castle, where guards typically are and their defenses. We have a basic outline, but we could use a better one." He gestured to the desk, so she wandered over there.
"Of course," she dipped the quill into ink, beginning to fill out the map of the castle.
OoOoO
Clary stretched her limbs a few mornings later, feeling her gut flip in her abdomen. She leaned over the bed, retching into the bucket by her bed. She woke up every morning to hurl up her guts. It was exhausting, and Jace would wake up and pull her hair away from her neck. She coughed violently, holding her stomach. She reached for her water, quickly drinking it. She found that drinking water in the morning after throwing up would help her stop.
She laid on her back, inhaling a deep breath. "I am sick of throwing up." She muttered, curling against her husband's side.
"I know you are." He stroked her hair, rubbing her back.
"I need to get to work." She sighed, climbing out of bed.
"Clary?" Jace hummed, as she pulled her clothes on.
"I really need to go, but I'll see you at dinner." She kissed his cheek, hurrying to Stephen's tent.
Once inside he poured her a glass a tea. She took a seat next to him at the desk and continued to map out he castle before she worked on the leather armor. She had to redo them multiple times because she had trouble remembering what armor looked like.
She yawned deeply, rubbing at her eyes as she leaned over the papers on her father-in-law's desk. She had been working nonstop on remembering the lay out of the castle from her childhood. There were so many halls and rooms that she hadn't even been in, which made it difficult to give a complete map to Stephen.
She had been working so hard on the map that she didn't notice when the sun began to set until someone came in and lit a candle for her. Clary rubbed at her eyes, looking up at Simon. She sighed softly, leaning back in her seat.
"I thought you could use some help." He grunted, as he sat in the chair next to her.
"Yes, please." She rubbed her hand over her face, gazing over at her best friend. "It's really hard remembering everything." She muttered, running her fingers through her locks.
"You've been working all day. Go get some dinner with Jace." He encouraged, taking the quill from her hand.
"Thank you." She kissed his head, wandering out of the tent.
She picked up her plate of food before leaning down to grab Jace's hand. She pulled him to his feet leading the way back to their home. "Everything alright?" Jace asked, as she set her food on the side table.
"I'm tired and brain-dead, and all I want is for you to be buried between my legs." She pushed him to their bed, straddling his waist, as she leaned down to kiss him.
OoOoO
A few more days had passed, Clary had made 10 leather armor tops for the men to use after she finished making map of the castle. She finally had a task to do where she observe her physical accomplishment. This feeling was different from the frustration she felt attempting to complete the map by recalling various rooms. To her, this job held more meaning and pride.
She was terrified that the takeover was so soon. She was going to be 6 months pregnant when they left. She didn't know what she thought would happen, but she never thought that she would be bringing a baby into a warzone. Her stomach churned at the thought of anything happening to her child.
"Alright, so they are made just like this." Clary finished explaining the process to a group of women, so they could finish this task sooner. Clary gathered the ones she already made, leaving a top behind for the other women to look at.
Jace had gathered 9 men, who he trusted the most. Clary put her arm around Jace after she dropped the leather tops. "Get those on." She ordered, drifting away from her husband.
"You are on top of things these days." Jace murmured in her ear, kissing it lightly.
"Thanks." She smiled, watching the men line up in front of her.
All nine of them looked stiff and uncomfortable. She knew the biggest challenge that these men were going to have was going to be that they had to wear a shirt. She felt like it was a ridiculous obstacle, but they never had to wear them. It's also heavy, which makes them uncomfortable.
"Now you all need to standstill for 4 hours and not fidget." She ordered, sitting on a log in front of them.
"4 hours?" Jace asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yes, at the palace they have shifts that last for hours on end, and they aren't allowed to move from their spot no matter the circumstances." She explained, gathering some more leather. She started stitching more leather together.
"Makes sense." Jace agreed, rubbing his hand over her back. "Don't work yourself too hard." He breathed, tipping her chin to look up at him. "You've been going since my father asked you to help out, and you don't need to do that. You said what we need to do, you just need to oversee what's happening. You're pregnant with our son, and I don't want you to run yourself into the ground." He explained, cupping her cheek in his large hands
"I just want to be helpful." She sighed, running her fingers through her hair.
"You are so helpful, Clary, but you are also pregnant. You have been throwing up your guts in the morning and sewing until midafternoon." He gave her a thoughtful look, as he took the leather from her hands. "You look exhausted. Take a nap." He encouraged her, holding her hand.
"Will you take one with me?" She asked quietly, getting to her feet.
"Um…" He looked back at the men, inhaling a deep breath. "Sure." He nodded, getting to her feet.
OoOoO
Her eyes fluttered open after her long nap, and Jace was curled against her back. He was right. She definitely needed that nap. She felt mildly refreshed for the first time over the last week or so. Jace was still out cold, but she didn't mind. She felt content just letting him hold her. He was a comforting presence.
Jace was the only thing keeping her steady. She let herself drift away from him over the last few days, and she realized that she was beginning to derail. She wanted to help so much, she neglected Jace, which wasn't fair to him. She knew that it was only a few days and that it wasn't a very big deal, but she was beginning to realize her dependence on him.
She wasn't sure how she felt about becoming a codependent person.
OoOoO
Clary stood in front of the mirror admiring her bare abdomen. It was as though she was noticing the swell of her stomach for the first time in four and a half months. She inhaled a deep breath, trailing her fingers over growing child. She was supporting the growth of a life and that thought filled her with never-ending joy.
"What are you doing?" Jace asked, wrapping his arm around her stomach. His hands splayed across her swollen belly which elicited a grin from Clary.
"Looking at our son." She laughed, leaning back against him.
"Well, he is beautiful." He chuckled, kissing behind her ear. "I can't wait to meet him." He hummed, chuckling softly.
"What will happen if he is actually a she?" She questioned softly, trailing her fingers over his.
"We try again." He snickered, smiling against her ear. "Is that a problem?" He asked, as she turned in his grasp.
"No, no problem at all." She brought her arms around his neck, gazing up at him.
"Good that was going to be really disappointing if you said no, but I would have done whatever you wanted." He leaned down, brushing their lips together slowly. She whimpered softly, as his hand slid down her back, holding her close to his body. She played with the hairs on his neck, drawing away from him.
"Are you happy?" He whispered, scanning his eyes over her face.
She was slightly taken aback by his question, but it didn't surprise her. Those first few months, she was beyond miserable. She was holding back from everything, too scared to let herself grow close to these people, but now that she was free of those fears, she saw the peace and love that surrounded her.
"Yes, I am very happy." She breathed, placing her forehead on his chest. He cradled her head lightly, hugging her to him.
"'I'm happy too." He sighed contently, tangling his finger into her hair. "Now there are about 50 men who you need to teach how to wear a shirt and sit still like the men they are." He chuckled, drawing away slowly.
"It's a lot of fun. I get to throw stuff at them, do goofy things." She laughed, adjusting her top and skirt to make sure they fit right. The fit the last few days that had been a little snug, which wasn't fun. She was probably going to have to have some clothes fitted.
"Sounds like so much fun, but I have to make sure they have enough food for when we are gone." He groaned teasingly, as squeezed her hands. "I'll see you at dinner." He kissed her cheek lightly before retreating from the tent.
A/N: Hope you guys liked it! There are only a few more chapters left, which makes me sad, but I am so excited that I have been able to write a story like this.
Please Review! I love hearing from you guys!