A/N: Here is chapter 2 guys! Enjoy! I hope you all enjoy! I considered everyone's suggestions and went with what fits their personalities best/ also what worked for the idea best as well. More to come!

PSA: To those that have been reading... I made a mistake and I'm so grateful it was caught. In chapter one- Bram/blue admitted to being out to his parents AND best friend, but he's not supposed to be out to Garrett yet as you can see in this chapter. Sorry for the confusion...that's what happens when you're working on no sleep, and multiple works at once! Has since been fixed! Lol enjoy guys!

Title: Masquerade

Chapter 2

Simon's Point Of View:

The second I got to lunch I was on edge. I'd been thinking about it all night and how I was going to do it. This is for Blue- I have to. I've never wanted anything more in my entire life. To finally know Blue would be everything.

I looked around the table and observed my friends. Abby was already in deep over a discussion about the cafeteria's inability to supply strawberry milk with Nick, while Leah looked uninterested. Garrett and Bram were sitting with us again today, and I couldn't help but notice how extra quiet Bram was. He hardly talks as it is, but even Garrett couldn't get him to keep a conversation going. He seemed troubled, and that's when I realized I was staring hardcore at both of them. Bram had glanced up and caught my eye. I quickly dipped my head, back to the attention of my soggy pizza.

"Simon," Abby announced my name, facing me. My eyes made a B-line for her face, hoping to avoid seeing Bram all over again.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Don't you think it's crazy that they can have disgusting things such as vanilla milk, but strawberry is too 'difficult' to obtain?" she rambled.

"Uh, I guess," I shrugged.

"Ugh, Simon. You're supposed to be helping me here!" Abby groaned, but before I could mistake her for actually being upset with me, she winked, and pushed her finger into my cheek.

"You okay, you seem kind of out of it?" Leah whispered over the table.

"Yeah, for once you're more quiet than Bram," Nick joked. Bram didn't seem to take offence, and managed a small smile. It faded quickly, and for a split second he looked like he wanted to say something, but for some reason this felt like the best time for me to say what I was thinking.

"Um, guys. What is everyone doing after school today?" I ask. Bram seems shut down, but I'm not sure why.

"Nothing for me," Leah responded. Abby shrugs and flips her hand toward Leah.

"Same, I don't have anything planned. Why, what's up?" she asks.

Just say it, Simon-"I was wondering if you guys wanted to hit up waffle house tonight?" I ask. "Let's say, seven?" I suggest. Okay…not what I meant.

Abby and Leah look at each other and nod.

"Uh, Si, the guys and I are actually going to be at Garrett's tonight. But I'm sure you're more than welcome to come too?" Nick announces, looking between Garrett and I.

"Oh, yeah. I don't mind! More the merrier!" Garrett chimes. "Mini party!" he hollers.

"Did someone say party?" A random student hollers from another table. Garrett leans back, gripping the table with his fingertips.

"Not you, freshy!" he spats, pulling himself upright again.

Great.

"Yes! Let's go!" Abby enthusiastically agrees. Leah glances at me for an out, but I need everyone together- so sure. I guess Garrett and Bram are part of our group, right? They only sit with us sometimes, but I guess it has been more so than not lately. They deserve to know about me- from me.

"Yeah, let's do it." I nod, and Leah rolls her eyes at me. I apologize with the tap of my foot under the table, but she ignores me.

FROM: hourtohour . notetonote

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 30 at 3:42 PM

SUBJECT: I Think We Should Go As…

Dear Blue,

I'm thinking today might be our last day to get costumes, so I think we should decide before it's too late and we have to go as crayons. For you it would work…but how would I go about picking a color? Just kidding. Anyway, I've been thinking about it, and here are the options:

1. If we want to be fully covered: Spiderman and Deadpool

2. If we want to show some skin: Barry Allen, and Wally West

That's all I got for ideas so far, so hopefully one of those appeal to you. If you have a better idea, let me know ASAP cause I'll try to go before the store closes tonight.

Love, Jacques

P.S. I'm going to do it tonight. I'm going to tell them. I'm both terrified, and relieved that it's finally time. Good luck tonight, if you plan on telling your friends tonight as well. You can do it, I believe in you!

Leah, Abby and I got to Garrett's and his mom walked us down into the basement, where they were already playing video games on the floor in front of the TV. His mom cleared her throat once we reached the bottom of the stairs and Garrett craned his neck back to see us standing there awkwardly beside his mom.

"Oh, hey guys!" he threw his arm in the air with a wave. His mom left us, and went back to whatever it was she was doing upstairs.

"How's it goin'?" he asks, looking at the three of us.

"Fine," Leah shrugs a shoulder and takes a seat on the couch.

"O-kay," Garrett slowly nods. He faces Nick and tells him to turn the game off.

"I guess we'll find something we can all do, huh?" Garrett asked with his hands on his hips.

"Like?" Nick asks, coming over to stand by Abby. She leans into him slightly, and I can see the roll of Leah's eyes from across the room.

"I don't know. We could always sit and talk," Garrett suggests.

"How about we play two truths and a lie?" Nick flips his palms up. Okay…that's actually too perfect.

"Greenfeld you start," Garrett elects poor Bram to begin the game. The look of horror on his face was discomforting. We all take a seat on the floor, in a circle, around Garrett's coffee table.

"I'll start!" Abby offers up, noticing the ill look on Bram's face as well. Garrett waves his hand toward her to proceed and she takes a seat on the floor- followed by the rest of us.

"Okay, so I have an aunt who lives in England," she starts, placing a finger to her chin. She taps it slowly as she thinks, and looks to the ceiling for help. "I once had a pet turtle, and yesterday I totally ran a red light."

"Abby…those were the worst choices for two truths and a lie I have ever heard," Garrett blinked.

"Shut up, they were all I could think of! Now pick out the lie!" she demanded.

"I say the Turtle thing," Nick spoke up.

"Ran a red light," Leah said.

"I'm going with ran a red light," I added.

"Hmm," Garrett thought, mimicking Abby with tapping a finger to his chin. "You don't have an aunt in England!"

"Bram?" Abby asks toward him. He looks up from his phone and blushes.

"Sorry, I wasn't listening," he confessed, going back to his phone.

"Ugh, you're out this round. I'm not repeating it. Anyway, Nick's right. I never had a turtle. I did however run a red light, and my aunt Sue lives in England. She met her husband on a trip and now lives there with him and their two kids."

"Boooor-ing, give me something good! Spier, you're up!" Garrett hollered with his hands cupped around his lips like a mega phone.

"Isn't Nick supposed to go? He guessed correctly," I sputtered, directing the attention in Nick. Garrett bats his hand at Nick and turned back to me. "Nah, he never has good ones either," Garrett shook his head.

"Hey!" Nick protested. This is it- here is your chance.

"Um, okay." I nod, noticeably nervous at this point- I had to be. "So…I can speak French pretty well," I begin.

"What's pretty well?" Garrett asks. I blink at him and my mouth falls open.

"I don't know…like I'm pretty fluent in it?" I question.

"Oh, okay," he narrows his eyes at me, hugging his knees to his chest. I shake my head lightly, trying to understand his question and proceed with, "I'm six foot two, and," I think about it a moment. Do I go all out? I feel like I have to- like this is too perfect of an opportunity. "And…I'm gay," I felt like I mumbled that last part. As the word slipped out of my mouth, Leah's head popped up, and so did Abby's. Shit I forgot Abby knows…crap. I look around just to see everyone's reactions, and Bram is staring at me with this bewildered expression. I almost wanted to look behind me to make sure there wasn't a ghost with the way he seemed shocked.

"Uh, shit…okay…well, I'm six-foot two…" Garrett's voice trails off. "I've also never heard you speak another language, so… the gay thing?" he answers, but doesn't sound confident. It's okay Garrett- it won't hurt my feelings if you think I'm gay.

"No…he speaks perfect French…" Leah mutters. "Si…did you just-"

"Come out? Yeah…" my heart is racing like never before. I feel like I just ran a marathon in under five seconds flat. My hands were trembling, and every part of me felt weak. There were no words, but Abby seemed to have this proud look on her face. The look I shot her read perfectly clear and she gave a slight nod that no one else could see.

"Simon, I'm so happy for you! That must have taken a lot of guts!" Abby plays off, getting up to hug me. I hug her back and it's comforting for a moment. Leah is still in shock, and Nick looks confused.

"Wait…you're gay?" he finally speaks.

"Y-yeah…I am," I nod. "I'm gay," I say and it rolls off my tongue effortlessly. Suddenly it doesn't feel as scary anymore after saying it aloud twice with people present- my friends even.

"Simon…Well, good for you bud, I'm happy for you. When did you know?" Garrett asked.

"Uh…only a little while ago…" I shrug, trying to play it off like I haven't been living like this forever. Leah still has yet to say anything, and Bram…well I can't justify his reaction because he's always quiet and I'm not sure how he's taking it. He seems kind of bothered by it…and I truly hope this doesn't offend him.

"I'm sorry I kept it under wraps for so long…it was just something I had to feel out, ya know?" I say to them.

"Of course, we totally understand that!" Garrett agrees. He looks at Bram a moment, and they exchange glances. Bram cowers into his phone, and ignores everyone's comments. Sometimes I wonder what makes him so anti-social.

"Si…I," Leah begins but she interrupts herself by getting up and walking toward the stairs. She waits a moment, but then disappears up the stairs.

"Leah!" I call out to her. "Let me go talk to her. I'll be right back," I said, excusing myself awkwardly. I'm outside Garrett's house where I find Leah staring at the street. Her arms are crossed over her chest and her eyes are red rimmed.

"Leah…" I speak up, placing a hand to her shoulder. She shrugged me off forcefully and I'm almost worried she gave herself whiplash.

"You could have told me that in private first before telling the whole world, Si."

"Leah I-"

"Look," she faces me, "I'm not trying to take away from your moment, but I-" Her words come to a halt, and she wants to say something else, but she shakes it out of my her head. "This is important, but because it's important I figured you would have told me something like this in private before announcing it to the world." She frowned.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I just wasn't ready…look I honestly don't think I would have been so ready to do this if it weren't for…well the guy I'm into."

"You're into someone? Does he go to our school?" Leah questions, tucking a piece of loose hair behind her ear.

"He does," I blush, thinking about Blue. "I call him Blue because that's what he signs his emails, and-"

"His emails? What emails?"

"I've been talking to him through email for about a year now. We have so much in common Leah, and I'm so excited to meet him…but basically we promised each other we would come out to our friends so we wouldn't have to hide once we meet," I explain. She appears uncertain, and the corner of her mouth quirks up.

"Are you sure he's real? Like he didn't just make you out yourself before you were ready as a way to play with you?"

"What? No! He wouldn't do that! He's going to come out to his friends tonight too," I defended him. Leah crossed her arms over her chest and sighed.

"I don't know, Si…when do you plan to meet this kid?"

"Tomorrow night, at the masquerade party," I state, hesitantly.

"At the party? Okay, well I just want you to be careful. Can I be there? Like in the background so I can make sure nothing goes wrong?"

"If you want, I wouldn't mind," I shrug, looking down at my shoe.

"I won't say anything, but I want to make sure you're safe. I don't need some weirdo in a mask carting you off and then I never see you again." She smirks, dropping her arms at her sides.

"I appreciate it," I smile. She steps toward me, and I can tell her anger hasn't lifted.

"Don't keep secrets from me ever again, and if you have to- tell me first!" she points a finger at me, before going in for a hug. I hold her tight and rest my cheek on her head.

"Okay, I promise," I smile contently. We break away and Leah starts back to the house.

"As long as you tell me things too," I press. Leah turns around and shoots me a pointed look.

"…What would I keep from you?" she asks.

"That's for you to tell me," I shrug, walking past her. She follows and stays quiet behind me. We get back inside Garrett's basement and my phone alerts me of an email. Leah steps passed me down the stairs and goes to join everyone again. They've been talking amongst themselves while we were gone, and stopped when Leah approached them. I sat on the step to read my email, and heavy flutters erupted in my chest when I saw Blue's address. My muscles tensed immediately when I read the subject, though:

'Can we talk about this?'

I don't want to open it, but I need to. I need to know what he has to say. I just hope I'm over thinking it, and maybe it's meant positively? Ugh…what if he changed his mind and he no longer wants to meet? What the hell would I do? I already came out to my friends! He should have enough courage to do it to at this point!

Okay, Simon- don't get angry before you know the whole story… I take a deep breath and opened the email.

FROM: bluegreen118

TO: hourtohour . notetonote

DATE: October 30 at 5:04 PM

SUBJECT: Can we talk about this?

Jacques,

I don't know what to say…but today has been a little weird for me. I don't know what to do, and I'm not sure coming out to you right now is the best idea. It's not something you did, but…well, I think I might know who you are, and when you find out who I am, I don't think you're going to like it very much.

I'm sorry… I don't think I can do it. I'm so, so sorry. Please don't hate me.

-Blue

I think my heart just fell out my ass. What the hell? He figured me out, but he doesn't have the decency to say whom he thinks I am- or to meet me?!

FROM: hourtohour . notetonote

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 30 at 5:10 PM

SUBJECT: Re: Can we talk about this?

Blue,

Um…okay? Well, I mean you say it's not me, but do you really think I'm not going to take it personally that you've decided not to come out to me because you think you know who I am? That's not okay, Blue…at least tell me who you think I am- Maybe if you knew the answer to that, you'd feel better about coming out to me.

Did you tell your friends at least?

Love, Jacques

I slip my phone back in my pocket, and join the rest of the group. They've abandoned the game due to my thrilling coming out showstopper and moved onto simple gossip. We got on the subject of people in theater, and then Bram got up to use the bathroom. Garrett got on the subject of Martin Addison and how he finds the kid to be a 'bizarre little fella', which got Abby going. He's been after her since she got to this school, and she wants nothing of it. Nick seemed annoyed at the comments, but didn't have a word to say about it.

Curiosity was killing me, and I needed to get a message back from Blue. It was taking way too long. Either that, or he's truly ignoring me. Great- now he's ignoring me, because of me.

That's a pure confidence booster right there, if you ask me…

FROM: bluegreen118

TO: hourtohour . notetonote

DATE: October 30 at 5:25 PM

SUBJECT: I'm sorry

I know it's you, and I don't need validation to make my decision. I got it today once everything seemed to click. I'm sorry Simon, I can't meet you- not yet. I'm sorry if it makes me a coward, but I need some time to sort things out. I hope you can forgive me…

-Blue

We were so close…so close to maybe being something so perfect and I go and ruin it somehow. Seriously, how is this my fault? How did he make it my fault? I slid my phone back into my pocket and forget even checking it again. I'm just mad at this point, and I want nothing more than to go home and hide away in my room.

"Hey, are you guys alright if I go…something just came up, and I need to take care of it," I say, standing from my spot on the ground. Leah looks up at me curiously and everyone's attention is on me.

"Yeah, sure Spier…we didn't do anything to make you uncomfortable, right?" Garrett asks, looking at everyone.

"Oh, no! No, I just really need to get home and help my dad with something. You guys are fine, and honestly I couldn't ask for better friends to come out to. So thank you for being so understanding." I smile warmly at them before jutting my thumbs behind me. "I'm gonna head out. Nick can you give the girls a ride?" I ask. He nods, and waves me goodbye.

I turn on my heels, and head for the stairs. Once outside, and in my car I feel like breaking down, but I don't. I hold it in for as long as I can.

Bram's Point of View:

Before descending back into the cave of Garrett's basement, I slipped my phone into my pocket and sighed. I hit the last step with a lazy thud and twisted my hand over the banister.

"I don't know, he said he was going to try to meet this kid tomorrow, but he doesn't know who it is," Leah was speaking to the group. I only picked up on the conversation once I realized Simon was missing.

"Hey, where is Simon?" I spoke up, approaching my spot.

"He bailed. He said he had to help his dad with something, but he looked kind of upset," Nick explained.

"Upset? About what?" I asked, trying to be casual.

"I think it has to do with what I said to him," Leah sighed, resting against the edge of the couch.

"What did you say?" Abby asked.

"I told him to be careful, and to not let this guy take advantage of him. I might have scared him."

"Guy?" I asked, looking at everyone. Garrett shot me a look and then rolled his eyes.

"Yeah- Spier is gay did you forget that? It only happened like five minutes ago…" Garrett smirked.

"No, I just didn't know what you were talking about." My voice was small.

"Leah says that Simon has been talking to some guy for a year, but he only goes by a nickname and won't come out to Simon."

"I didn't say he wouldn't come out- they have plans to meet tomorrow," Leah corrected.

"Oh…well, okay," I nod.

"What else did he say about him?" Nick asked.

"I don't know. Our conversation was sort of short, but I think he's really into him. He was so excited when he talked about meeting him," Leah explains. I feel it all at once- the horrible stabbing of the metaphorical knife right through my chest. Smack dab over my heart. How could I be such an asshole to him?

"I don't know…I just don't want to see him get hurt," Leah frowned.

"Yeah, me either. Anyone who goes out of his way to hurt Simon is a piece of shit in my book. He doesn't deserve it. He's such a nice kid." Garrett answers, and I glare at him. He has no idea I'm Blue, or that I'm gay. When I got here, Nick was already playing video games with Garrett and I didn't feel comfortable telling Nick yet. I wanted Garrett to know first, and I honestly don't know why it has taken me so long to come out to him. I have my reasons for not wanting to tell Simon tomorrow, but now I'm wondering if those reasons are really that important.

"Can we change the subject? I feel like we're gossiping about him now," Abby shakes her head, turning away from the subject of Simon. Thank god.

"Yeah…I'm just worried. Maybe I should text him," Leah continues to frown and pull out her phone.

"Or maybe he's really helping his dad?" I offer up. She shrugs and continues to type a mile a minute into her phone.

"Or not," I mumble to myself. I pull out my own phone and see if I have any messages from him from my last email. Still no response- he is really upset with me. And rightfully so- I'm an asshole.

It's not that I don't want to be out to Simon because every part of me would love to call him my boyfriend, but I guess the only thing holding me back is our friend group. What if we don't work out? Do I risk being the reason we can no longer be friends with everyone? Garrett just got done telling me how much he loves hanging out with them and that's why we've been sitting at the table more. He feels accepted by them, and why shouldn't he? We all get along so well…so what if I ruin that? Not even just that…what if he see's it's me and realizes he doesn't want me to be Blue? Maybe he'll be expecting someone else, and then get's so disappointed that he starts to hate me? I know I'm being over the top, but these are serious concerns.

Knowing Simon is Jacques is probably the best thing to happen to me. The crush I've had since freshman year of high school is turning out to be the love of my life…who else would this happen to? …And I'm about to blow it like a fucking moron. Holy shit. I can't let Simon go- not after what we've been through…not after what he did for me-

OH MY GOD- he came out to his friends for me… he told them and I can't even muster up the courage to meet him still? Oh, Bram- Abraham Louis Greenfeld- I'm so disappointed in you.

Garrett suggests we change the subject of Simon as well and moves onto playing a game. We play about three rounds of Cards Against Humanity, but it's interrupted on my end when my phone chimes. My heart goes into a frenzy immediately. I don't want to see who the email is from, but I know right away it's Simon. I look down and see his address. I open the email and begin reading it.

I jump up from the floor in shock of the words on my screen, and realize everyone is staring at me.

"Sorry, I have to go." I say, rubbing my hands down the front of my jeans.

"Uh, okay. You alright, buddy?" Garrett asks, eyeing me up and down. I nod, and rush for the stairs.

"Yeah, I'll see you guys at school tomorrow. I forgot I have a paper due tomorrow in English." I say, stepping onto the first step before being stopped by Nick's voice.

"Wait…we have a paper due?" Nick spazzes, turning around with wide eyes. Oh, right.

"Oh, uh. Did I say English?" I ask, stalling to come up with something better.

"Uh, yeah!" Nick spastically throws his hands out.

"Oh, I meant world history," I laugh, starting up the steps again.

"Wait- what!" Abby freaks out. Oh come on!

"Not world history…uh…oh, um…" All eyes are on me, and Garrett looks oddly suspicious of me. "Oh, I don't know! I have a paper due- bye!" I yell back, running up the stairs.

I dart out to my civic and it feels like I'm running out of time.

Simon's Point of View:

I'm driving around town when I see the Halloween stores lights bright as day, just ahead of me.

"Fucking Blue," I mumble, passing the store. "You can't even tell me who you are?!" I holler. I pound the steering wheel with my palm a few times before gripping it and bellowing out a startling growl.

"FUCK!" I scream once more. I can feel my nostrils flaring as I grit my jaw. I'm thinking about it too much, and I just want to forget about him. I drive to the grocery store, and run into the Oreo isle. I scan the shelves for double stuffed and somehow they are all out. My eyes narrow in on the Oreo's with the orange frosting and my nostrils begin flaring again.

The Halloween one's are my favorite…

It plays through my head in a loop. I can't shake anything Blue even if I wanted too. I grab the stupid package and a pint of milk and go to sit in my car outside the store. I get through a row of the cookies, and realize this is maybe what heartbreak feels like. It's so stupid of me to be mad at someone over my computer, but it's not just someone anymore…he's Blue…he's my Blue. We were going to know each other and now for whatever reason- he doesn't want too.

Okay, so he figured out it was me…fine, but saying 'It's not you' always means 'it's you'. I don't care if he doesn't find me attractive, he could have just said that.

I start to impersonate in a random, condescending tone of voice before shoving a cookie into my mouth, "Hey, Si, I figured out it was you and well…you're just not my type…like you wear glasses, and you're kind of dorky and I was hoping for someone other than you, but here we are- so."

I chew urgently and take deep breaths through my nose. I rest my head back against the headrest as I close my eyes. Just forget him- Simon. He wants to be this way, fine…be this way.

"Ugh…FUCK!" I scream for the millionth time that night. I turn my key, and back out of my spot swiftly and try not to sideswipe the car beside me. I'm speeding down the street, back toward the Halloween store, praying I don't get pulled over. I swing into a spot right in the front, and jump out. They are open late tonight for last minute costumes, but I want to get in there before all the good costumes are gone and I'm left trying to figure out what to wear.

When I walk in, I shoot for the superhero section and scan the isle for the costume. I look at the Flash costumes, but of course nothing is in my size. I look for the Green Lantern and again- only smalls.

"Hi, do you have this in a large, in the back?" I ask, holding up the green packaging to the women walking by. She shakes her head and states that whatever is on the floor is what we have.

"Shit," I mumble to myself. I get further down and start picking up random stuff just to see sizing. I turn down the next isle and of course the only options left are He-Man, Thor, and the Hulk…I'm supposed to go dressed as a giant green monster? Don't think so. I pick up the Thor costume and look it over. To my surprise, behind it was a stack of comic book-like Deadpool costumes. I pick it up and smile at the sizes. They have the costume, and it's going to fit me…

Okay…maybe it's a sign, but I can't be sure. I grab the costume and take it to the register. I pay for it and head home once I've made sure I truly want to do this. When I get to my bedroom, I throw open my laptop and draft the most nerve wracking email of my life.

FROM: hourtohour . notetonote

TO: bluegreen118

DATE: October 30 at 8:55 PM

SUBJECT: I'm not sorry

Blue,

I'm not sorry for who I am, but I am sorry that you can't seem to get passed that. I know I'm not the hottest guy out there, and I tend to talk everyone's ear off at times, but that's who I am. I'm done apologizing for that. Part of me wants to know your reasoning for not wanting to meet me now, but I think I already know…

Blue, I love you…and I'll say it again- I don't care what you look like or who you are because you'll always be Blue to me. We have such a special relationship, and I never took you for the shallow type, which is probably what upsets me the most about this whole thing. I'm willing to put myself out there and meet you- and to tell my friends- who took me being gay very well, by the way. I bet you didn't even tell your friends… Whatever, I can't make you do things that make you uncomfortable.

Look…Blue, I'm going to the party tomorrow night- I got my Deadpool costume and whether you show up or not will be the answer I need. Either you show up and we start living the life we both want for each other, or you don't…and we call it what it is...

It's up to you, Blue.

Love, Simon

A/N: UGH ANGST. But i'm sure we all know where it's going ;) Enjoy the next coming chapter guys! I don't think there will be too much more for this one, but i'll be sure to make the chapters as long as possible.