CHAPTER 2

The Letter

...

The throne room was full of people - most of the servants were not present though and instead continued with their work elsewhere in the castle. Only the best servants were allowed to come to the meeting. (Which is why Arthur was sure Merlin must have been an exception. He was lazy and never arrived on time - today was the perfect example of that - but he was still the prince's servant.)

The guest that the king had invited to Camelot was Kaunos — a young but very effective witchfinder from Northumbria. Even if they'd never heard of him before, every servant who came into the throne room was honored to be there.

Oh, except one of course.

That idiot, Arthur cursed in his head again. Of course he wasn't here. Why would he care about his duties? After all, this was Merlin. And he's never been able to do his job before so why should he care now?

But seriously, did he leave Arthur on the meeting alone on purpose? Because it was boring as hell and Arthur longed to do literally anything else and be anywhere but here. Being back in his chambers with Merlin was the most pleasant option.

He'd never met Kaunos, only heard about him a few times on his travels. There wasn't much to hear though. He was very young, only about two years older than Arthur himself, and he'd only helped a king to find sorcerers twice. Both times he was surprisingly successful despite his age and the expected lack of experience.

"You'll start your work tomorrow," Uther said, bringing Arthur back to reality. He was sitting beside his father on the other throne. The only throne left empty was the one that belonged to Morgana.

"Of course, my lord." Kaunos bowed and smiled up at Arthur and the king. All the ladies and lords in the throne room couldn't keep their eyes off Kaunos. He was charming and kind to everyone around him.

"I'll give you a tour around the castle," Uther continued. "After all, we should get to know each other."

Kaunos bowed again. "It would be my pleasure."

Uther nodded at the guards at the end of the room. They opened the door and everyone started leaving; Arthur stood up as quickly as he could, eager to find his idiotic servant.

"Arthur," Uther stopped him. His expression showed that he knew exactly what Arthur had in mind, and he was not pleased. "I'd like you to get to know Kaunos, too."

"Sire," Kaunos bowed to the prince with another nice smile. But Arthur couldn't think about anything than the fact that Merlin wasn't there with them.

"Of course, father," replied Arthur, forcing a pleasant expression upon his face.

"Kaunos will be taking the chambers next to yours."

"You can visit me any time you wish, sire," Kaunos offered, still maintaining that wide smile. "I imagine you come to contact with magic quite often on your travels. Not everyone in this world is as honest and just as we are, am I correct?"

Arthur could only concentrate on the way Kaunos' expression flickered to disgust for a second as he said the word magic.

"I do - I've had to fight creatures of magic even inside these walls," Arthur replied, purposely mentioning magic again so that the annoyingly charitable smile Kaunos wore would disappear, even if just for a moment.

It really was the only interesting part of this entire morning. (Except for Merlin's smile as he handed him the vest - Arthur couldn't stop thinking about that.)

"That won't be a problem anymore," Uther patted Kaunos' shoulder good-naturedly. "I've heard about your work in king Rodor's kingdom, Nemeth."

"Well," Kaunos smiled, "that wasn't as easy as people might make it sound, my lord, but I believe my work here in Camelot will be just as successful as in the stories that you've heard."

"I'm sure they're more than stories."

Uther seemed happier than usual, considering Morgana was still missing. Perhaps Kaunos' arrival brought his hope back?

"Father, if I could be excused?" Arthur simply couldn't wait any longer. He needed to return to his chambers, find Merlin there, ask him where the hell he'd been and then give him some extra chores so he would need to stay with him in his chambers even longer.

After Uther gave him the permission to leave, Arthur bowed to Kaunos again and hurried from the throne room.

He would give Merlin as many chores as he could to ensure the servant stayed with him in the chambers all day. Arthur could keep an eye on him that way, and he wouldn't even care that Merlin ignored his chores and only did half of them.

Arthur sped up as he entered another hall, where he could finally see the doors to his chambers. He could almost see himself standing inside and looking at that idiot. Merlin would then tell him that he'd found another rat and wanted to take care of it before the meeting and that he simply hasn't caught the rodent yet. And Arthur wouldn't care what the reason behind his absence was anyway.

All he really cared about was that Merlin was alright.

So when he opened the door and walked inside only to find the chambers completely empty, the first thing he felt was an increasing unease. But then he forced it away, thinking that Merlin was probably with Gaius, helping him with someth- but Gaius had been in the throne room with everyone else.

"Merlin?"

Arthur looked around, his unease returning. Wait, he could be in the tavern! At this time of the day though -and after he'd promised that he'd be there to meet Kaunos with him? He was an idiot with almost no survival instincts, but surely he didn't want to see Arthur that angry and disappoint him that much?

As Arthur stepped farther into the room, his gaze finally landed on his working desk.

There was a letter there, with a nicely curved Arthur's name on the front of the envelope.

Arthur froze - it was Merlin's handwriting.

After closing the door, he walked over to the table. He carefully picked up the letter and sat down on his bed, tracing his thumb over his name written in the dark blue ink. What could have Merlin possibly wanted to tell him in a letter?

With the unsettling feeling inside him growing into something like fear, Arthur opened the envelope and pulled out a folded piece of paper.

Dear Arthur,

You're probably wondering why I chose to tell you this through a letter and not in person. Well, that's because if I wanted to tell you in person, I'd have to march in to the meeting and I'm guessing you wouldn't like that at all. And neither would your father.

I'm truly sorry, but I had to leave Camelot.

It's really fascinating how many things can change in only a few minutes, but that's exactly what happened. I'm sorry I wasn't there when Kaunos arrived and I'm sorry that you'll have to manage without me in the next couple of days, but I'll come back eventually.

This isn't forever. I will come back. I promise.

Goodbye Arthur.

Merlin

xoXÖXox

Gaius had just returned home from the meeting when someone opened his door without knocking. It was Arthur - of course it was Arthur.

"Gaius!"

"My lord," Gaius bowed to him, trying to look as if nothing was wrong. But he knew why Arthur was there - he surely must have noticed Merlin's absence by now. But sadly, Gaius had nothing to tell him. He couldn't risk Merlin's secret only because Arthur was angry.

He had to lie.

"Where is he?" Arthur asked as expected, walking closer to the old physician until he was standing right in front of him. "Why did he have to leave Camelot? What happened?"

That took Gaius by a surprise, which he expressed by raising his eyebrow. He didn't expect Arthur to know that Merlin had left Camelot. But as Gaius soon noticed, the prince was holding a folded piece of paper - Merlin must have written him a letter then. Of course he would do that. He wouldn't just leave Arthur without letting him know.

But that meant that the lie Gaius had prepared about Merlin being in the tavern was useless now.

"I'm sorry, Arthur. I can't tell you."

"What do you mean you can't tell me?" Arthur didn't look pleased with Gaius' answer at all.

"Arthur," Gaius tried to sound sympathetic, "there are certain things that Merlin has to do alone. And I promised I wouldn't tell you about them."

"What could he possibly be hiding from me?"

It hurt Gaius to see Arthur this angry. Because behind that anger was saddness and Gaius knew that. He could see right through him, through both him and Merlin. He'd known Arthur ever since he was a little boy, after all - and right now, all he could see was Arthur's need to be assured that Merlin hadn't left him.

"I'm sure he'll tell you once he comes back." Gaius knew that wasn't likely to happen, but it was what Arthur needed to hear now.

"When will he come back then?"

"I don't know."

"What does he expect me to do when he's not here?" Arthur turned abruptly, starting to pace. "Should I find a new servant? I-" Gaius knew exactly what Arthur wanted to say - that he didn't want a new servant. Merlin has always been more than just a servant to him; he was his best friend as well. And even though Arthur didn't like showing it much, it was easily noticeable just by the way they acted around each other, the way they talked to each other . . .

"Sire, you will simply have to wait. It won't be long, I promise." Gaius lied again to reassure him that Merlin would return to him, but Arthur only shook his head and let out a humorless scoff.

Without saying anything else, he left Gaius' quarters.

Once more, Gaius found himself alone in an empty room without his favourite person in the world to occupy it, and with a broken heart.

xoXÖXox

All Arthur could think about as he was leaving Gaius' chambers was the letter. How could Merlin have just left him like that? And where did he go? And why didn't he want Arthur to know the reason? Did he really not care about Arthur at all? Was everything that Arthur saw between them a lie?

He took a deep breath and hurried down the stairs that led to the tower where Gaius and Merlin lived, taking the steps two at a time and swiftly entering the courtyard.

But still, how could Merlin have just left him like that? He couldn't have known that he'd be leaving when he was in Arthur's chambers that morning. He seemed . . . fine then. He even gave him that vest so Arthur wouldn't freeze to death . . . Did Merlin even have anything other than his thin clothes with him? He never cared much about himself and paid more attention to others.

Arthur sighed in frustration. He looked up to see if anyone heard him, but all he saw was the courtyard full of people in warm clothes, minding their own business. And no Merlin.

Still looking around the courtyard, he noticed Gwen. Gwen and Merlin were good friends! He must have told her why he was leaving, right? But then - why would he tell her and not him?

"Gwen!" Arthur called her name. She was walking away from him towards the stairs to the castle, but when she heard him, she turned around and smiled.

"Sire," she bowed slightly. She was holding an empty basket.

Arthur went straight to the point. "Did you by any chance see Merlin this morning?"

Her smile disappeared almost instantly. "Yes," she nodded. Arthur's eyes filled with hope. "He was on his way to your chambers, I believe. He had a backpack on his shoulders and he . . . he looked like he'd been crying."

Upon hearing that, Arthur froze – he felt like a dagger had been driven into his heart. Merlin was crying? Was he crying because he had to leave Camelot or was he crying because of that unknown reason behind his disappearance?

"Did he say anything?" Arthur asked her almost desperately.

"He only asked me not to follow him," Gwen answered. "He hugged me and then ran away . . . Arthur, what's going on?" Her eyes clearly showed that she was worried.

Arthur swallowed as he prepared his answer. "Merlin- . . . He's left Camelot."

"What?" Gwen's eyes widened and she covered her mouth with her free hand. "Why?"

"That's what I don't know," Arthur sighed and closed his eyes briefly. "He left me only with a letter, but he didn't explain anything. He only said he'd return as soon as he could."

"And when do you think that'll be?"

"I don't know, Gwen," he shrugged. "Not even Gaius wanted to tell me."

Gwen frowned at that. "Merlin looked really upset when I saw him," she continued. "But he didn't want me to follow him."

"I made no such promise," Arthur said.

"Do you want to go after him?"

"Maybe," Arthur nodded. "Probably. I don't know yet." He knew he couldn't stay in Camelot and just wait though.

They started walking towards the castle together. Arthur was still holding the letter in his hand, but he hid it inside his pocket. For some reason, he didn't want anyone to see it.

"Perhaps something happened to his mother," Gwen suggested as they went up the stairs together.

Arthur hadn't thought about that. "Maybe."

"Well, I have to go," Gwen smiled at him and bowed again when she saw that they both headed in different ways. "I hope he's safe and okay."

"Me too," he nodded.

"And good luck, my lord."

Arthur nodded and attempted to return the smile. Then he left, on his way back to his chambers.

It would make sense if Hunith was ill or wounded – or worse, dying. He knew Merlin and from his brief encounter with his mother two years ago, he knew that she loved her son just as much as Merlin loved her. That boy would stop at nothing to get to her as soon as he could if she was bedridden.

Arthur sighed and was turning another corridor to get to his chambers when he suddenly spotted his father with Kaunos. He cursed under his breath as Uther looked up, noticing him.

"My lord," Arthur forced his lips into a smile as he approached. "Kaunos."

"My pleasure to meet you again, sire," Kaunos bowed.

"Arthur," Uther told him, "Please show Kaunos to his prepared chambers." He turned to Kaunos and continued, "Unfortunately, as king, I have other duties."

"I understand, my lord." Kaunos bowed and when Uther left them alone, he turned to Arthur with a smile. "Camelot is indeed a very beautiful place."

"It is." Arthur wasn't really in the mood to talk about anything with Kaunos right now. But his chambers and Kaunos' were right next to each other, which meant they were going the same way and conversation was inevitable.

"May I ask, how was the castle built?"

"Here," Arthur showed him the way and as they began walking, he cleared his throat and answered. "It's been standing for many decades and there are many stories about how it was built. One of them says that a powerful sorcerer helped build it. His name was Cornelius Sigan."

"I've heard about him."

As Arthur expected, Kaunos' smile disappeared as soon as the topic of their conversation turned to magic.

"Most people believe it's only a story, although-"

"Oh, no, he existed," Kaunos interrupted him. "He's mentioned in many books that I've read and they all say the same - his power drove him mad. That's what magic does to people."

"My father shares your opinion." Arthur nodded, but couldn't help but sigh silently.

"You don't?"

Arthur . . . hadn't really thought about that. "I do," he eventually answered, although he wasn't sure. Most of the sorcerers he'd met were evil and eager to kill him or destroy Camelot. But there were times when he'd seen magic help people too.

"Well, I hope I can count on you if I find trouble during my work then," Kaunos smiled.

They were almost near his chambers, and Arthur was counting the seconds until they reached that door. He really wanted to leave and be alone.

"According to what we've all heard about you, I'm sure there won't be any trouble."

Kaunos laughed at that. "Let's hope so."

As soon as he said that, they entered the corridor with the doors to Kaunos' chambers at the end and Arthur's right next to them.

"These are your rooms," said Arthur, opening the doors for him with a smile.

"Thank you," Kaunos nodded as he stepped inside, then turning to Arthur before the prince could walk away. "I look forward to getting to know you more, sire."

"Likewise," Arthur smiled. "Well, enjoy your new home."

"I will."

And with that, Kaunos closed the door and Arthur turned away from him, finally going back to his own chambers. He slipped his hand into his pocket and palpated the letter, closing his eyes briefly as his smile turned into a frown.

He didn't know what had caused Merlin to leave as abruptly as he'd done. He couldn't even be sure that it was really about Hunith. But he knew what he had to do. He'd follow Merlin and find him, telling him that he was an idiot and then offering him help, whatever it was that Merlin needed.

Merlin should know that Arthur was more than willing to help him with his mother. And if it wasn't about his mother and it was something else . . .

Well, Merlin had been there for Arthur before. So why shouldn't Arthur be there for him?

xoXÖXox

Moving into a different kingdom, different city and a different castle was always a challenge, but Kaunos was sure these white walls would feel like home to him soon enough. He knew that he shouldn't get too attached to anyone though because with his kind of job, any of these people could end up on the pyre the next day.

The king seemed like a wise man, but he feared magic. Magic shouldn't be feared, not if one had the right knowledge, which Kaunos of course had. It was his job after all. And the prince? A charming young man, but he didn't seem as fierce as his father. He was still young though. Only a few years younger than Kaunos himself.

Kaunos sighed and without further ado, he got to work. He found his belongings beside his bed just like he'd expected. He didn't own much, but it was probably more than any commoner. He only had a few pieces of clothing to wear, but he didn't worry about that. The king was kind enough to have clothes made for him.

What he cherished the most, however, was books. He owned many of them, and all of them were about magic. He didn't practice it himself, no - he'd never been cursed with its power. But in order to defeat magic, one must fully understand it. Besides, most of these books were full of information about one thing that mattered the most to him - the prophecy.

Ever since he lost his parents to magic and had to live with the druids, he'd heard about the old mighty prophecy. About the most powerful sorcerer to ever be – Emrys - and the Once and Future King. Together they'd unite the lands of Albion and magic would once again be free . . .

Kaunos could never allow that to happen.

Magic was evil and it spread like a disease. He'd promised himself years ago that he'd rid the world of it. And after learning so much from the druids and from his precious books, he knew what he had to do first.

Find Emrys. That man was supposed to be magic itself, whatever that was supposed to mean. He had to be destroyed. Once he found out who this Emrys was, Kaunos would kill him without hesitation.

After that was done and magic was still in the world, he'd continue onward and leave Camelot to find the Crystal Cave. According to his book on the origins of the Old Religion, this very cave was the source of magic in the world. And just like Emrys, it needed to be destroyed.

Kaunos smiled as he picked up his new book – it was completely blank. He'd use that to write down any information on Emrys in Camelot that he found. Camelot was a place where magic was forbidden, and yet it was the place most cursed with it. It was everywhere - Kaunos could almost feel it.

And Uther had no idea.

Or maybe he did – he'd asked Kaunos to come here, after all.

Kaunos took all of his books and put them on his new table, turning around to look at the empty shelves that were in front of his desk. He'd need to put the books there in some order - should he sort them alphabetically? Or perhaps based on the amount of knowledge they possessed? Or the importance? Thickness?

He sighed and looked at the books on the table and then at the empty shelves again. This would take a lot of work. But he had time.

Before he started though, he wanted to take a look at his new chambers. The fire in the hearth was already burning, allowing him to remove his coat. He stepped to the window and peered through the glass, looking outside. He could see the courtyard, the gate and the towers, with the hills far in the distance.

He had a great view. His window was quite high above the ground, but he could still see and sometimes recognize the people. Well, at least one of them - the prince.

Kaunos frowned as he looked down at him. Arthur was heading for the stables. Kaunos knew that because Uther had shown him where the stables were. But seeing Arthur down there, choosing a horse and then inevitably heading to the gate brought up two questions in his mind:

Why was the prince leaving Camelot alone? And where was he going?

In the end, Kaunos decided that it was none of his business and returned to the table, folding his arms on his chest and wondering what would be the best order for his books on the shelves.

A knock on the door interrupted him just as he was picking up the first book. He put it back on the table and cleared his throat. "Come in."

The door opened and a young serving girl stepped into the room.

"Oh, hello," he smiled at her.

"Good morning, sire," she bowed to him.

"Oh, there's no need for that," he widened his smile as he neared her, "Just Kaunos is fine. I'm not used to titles."

She smiled at him again but didn't reply to that. Instead, she revealed a little purse hanging on her tiny belt, untied it and handed it to him. He accepted it with a curious smile. "The king sends you this."

"Really?" Kaunos opened the purse and looked inside, his light smile turning into a grin. It was the ink that he'd asked the king to give him! He really needed that for his notebooks. "Thank you, ehm-"

"Mauri."

"Thank you, Mauri," he smiled at her and she bowed again, leaving the room.

Kaunos closed the door behind her and put the little brown purse on the table, opening it wider. There were four kinds of inks.

A standard black ink that he used to write down anything that he needed.

Green ink for people who he'd already checked and were innocent.

Blue ink for suspicious people that he wanted to keep an eye on.

And red ink for sorcerers that he'd successfully found and delivered to the king, who usually sentenced them to death.

These four colours allowed him to keep everything in order so that he wouldn't forget about anything important. And he couldn't wait until he could start going from house to house, writing down everyone's names and beginning his search. All but one name - Gaius. Uther had told him a little about the old physician and he'd made it clear that Gaius was to be excused from all of this.

One thing was clear though. There was a sorcerer somewhere in Camelot and he knew it. He just needed to find him or her and get rid of them so the kingdom could be saved.

xoXÖXox

This was surely the worst day of Merlin's life in Camelot so far. He'd never had to leave Arthur behind like this, not this quickly and with only a letter as a goodbye. He had thought that he'd stay with him forever, not leave him because living in Camelot turned out to be more dangerous than he'd expected. He was used to danger. But he wasn't used to being without Arthur, not like this, when he didn't even know for how long.

He had to be strong though. For Arthur.

Merlin brushed away the tears that rolled down his cheek - it was too cold and the wind was blowing in his face, but that wasn't the only reason. Pursing his lips, Merlin came to a halt and slowly turned around.

One last look at Camelot.

He was staying at the edge of the forest, with the blindingly white castle in perfect view from there. It looked so small from the distance . . . He could still see the towers though, and also the gate, the Lower Town, the citadel . . . He'd miss that place a lot. Arthur was there right now, somewhere - alone. Merlin felt a pang of guilt in his chest. He wished so much to see Arthur again and apologize - even if he'd had no other choice but to leave. Just like he had to do now.

It was time to go.

He took a deep breath and turned away, closing his eyes. Slowly, he started to walk away, but couldn't help but glance back at the castle again. At his home.

When he heard an owl howl in the distance, he took that as a sign and finally turned away for good. He set off at a quick pace down the well-worn footpath through the forest, hoping that the wind wouldn't get any stronger than it already was. He didn't have anywhere to hide and he didn't have anything besides his unfinished breakfast and two apples to eat either - which meant he had to find something to eat and a place to hide, like a village, soon.

It had already been a few hours since he left.

He was sure that Arthur had read the letter by now. And he was probably angry with him because he'd promised to be at the meeting. At first, Arthur must have thought Merlin was late again. But once he got back to his chambers, finding only a stupid letter in Merlin's stead without an explanation, he must have been furious.

For a moment, Merlin regretted not staying long enough to say goodbye to Arthur in person. But that wouldn't have been as easy as it was with Gwen. He couldn't just ask Arthur not to follow him, he'd have to list at least ten good reasons for why he was leaving and he really didn't have any. He didn't even have a lie to tell Arthur - he didn't want to lie about his mother being ill, she didn't deserve that.

But Gaius had remained in Camelot and he'd surely come up with something to tell Arthur about Merlin's whereabouts. Preferably not the tavern. Arthur would never believe that Merlin got lost in the tavern for three weeks - or however long it took him to get back to Camelot.

The wind picked up again and Merlin cursed – and thanks to the increasing gale, he couldn't even hear the words. With a frustrated sigh, he rolled up the collar of his jacket, grabbed the corners of his sleeves and covered as much of his hands as he could, leaving out only his pointy fingers to hold the sleeves in place. Then he folded his arms on his chest, letting his jacket cover his stomach and hips as well. It wasn't much, but it was all he had until he found a place shielded from the wind, where he could start a fire.

Staying in Camelot for another day didn't seem like such a bad idea now, no matter how dangerous it might have been. Having to close his eyes against the wind, cheeks stinging as he froze to death, wasn't what he'd expected.

Another hour later, he was still in the forest and nothing had really changed. He didn't know any spell that would stop the wind or warm his hands and he didn't want to risk using spells he wasn't familiar with, in case he set his only jacket on fire for example. So he gritted his teeth and continued walking.

He was broken out of the monotony suddenly – a strange noise sounded in the distance. He frowned and stopped walking, glancing around at his surroundings and finding nothing but trees. It was probably nothing - only the wind.

But then he heard it again. It sounded a lot like a whistle.

This time, he turned around suspiciously – he was sure it wasn't just the wind.

"Look at what we got here," someone said. A malicious voice.

There were about ten men standing around him, each holding a weapon of some kind, ranging from a long sword to a little dagger. Merlin's eyes widened, taking in their scruffy appearances and hard eyes.

Bandits.