Author's Note: I do apologize for the delay – I have chronic fatigue syndrome, and all of my plans were interrupted when, a few days ago, my body decided to absolutely crash; by even writing this I am defying the exhaustion (and the headaches). This chapter is by far the most ridiculous, but I felt that Edward needed his day in court (so to speak), so this is in his point of view. As Stephenie Meyer has stated (and sorry if I'm bursting anyone's bubble), Edward does lie. As it turns out, not only is he a pack rat, but he might be worse than the rest of them put together!

Chapter Seven:

Edward

I heard her heartbeat before I heard her voice. I could smell her enticing blood long before she entered the room. For a moment, I forgot myself, before I realized the state of my normally-pristine room. I had told Bella that I was the neatest of the Cullen's – and my beautiful lady believed me. She was three steps from the door now, providing me just enough time to gather the assorted mess from my floor and stuff it into the already heaving closet.

I straightened my face as she entered the room with my brothers at her heels. I was confused for a moment, until I saw a rather untimely tragedy via Alice's mind.

"Hello again," I spoke into Bella's ear as I simply kissed her cheek. The less mocking I had to suffer from my brothers, the better. "How was your day?"

She grinned cheekily. What had they put her up to? I reached out, only to find blocked minds. "It was very good. I just had a delightful afternoon tea with Esme. She made the most amazing cheesecake."

Now I knew that something was up – Bella wasn't one for idle chit chat.

"I think," I spoke, trying not to give away my suspicions, "That I enjoyed cheesecake as a human, too."

"Silly Edward," she laughed, and my heart soared, "everyone loves cheesecake."

I tried to piece things together. My brothers were here, so I'm sure that there was a bet of some sort involved. Bella had turned my pet name for herself upon me – meaning that they intended that I receive my comeuppance.

"So, what's up?" I tried to sound casual, but the smirk on Emmett's face told me that I was caught – I rarely used contemporary human slang, unless I was particularly nervous.

"Well," Bella began, taking a seat on my couch, "I've been wondering what you were up to all day. My first guess was that you left me to bond with your family; however, Jasper here mentioned, over cheesecake and iced tea, that you're actually quite the hoarder."

I shook my head in confusion for a moment. "Jasper was eating cheesecake?"

"That's a manipulative girl you've got there." Jasper nodded, "we have a deal. I ate the cheesecake, she becomes my student."

I didn't like the sound of that. "So you decided to slander my good name while you were the one consuming two-hundred-and-fifty calories per slice?"

"It's not slander if it's true." Emmett grinned. His mind was now checking off the seemingly worthless items that were stuffed into my closet.

"We decided," Bella spoke, and I sat next to her, hoping my closer presence would addle her enough to deter her from this disgusting plot. "That the only way to find out is to open your closet."

"If we win the bet, we pay for Bella's college education." Jasper explained.

"And if you win?" I looked into my angel's eyes for any sign of disapproval. Sadly, she was entirely invested in this little game.

"Well, I said to myself, my Edward wouldn't lie to me," her tone was doused in sarcasm, "so, should I win, I will be in no way obliged to keep the stuff that now sits in the driveway, awaiting removal to Charlie's house."

At that moment, I knew that I was between a rock and a very full closet. The worst part was that my brothers knew that I fully approved of the bet – but the terms were at the expense of my calm and collected façade. Was I willing to let Bella see the part of me that she herself had created – the mess and confusion in my life?

"Go ahead," I said with a sigh. Bella moved towards the door, gripped the handle, and I was hit with the full weight of Alice's vision.

"No!" I screamed, but it was too late.

My Bella was buried in clothes, books, and other assorted mementos.

Carlisle came in quickly, and soon there were four male vampires tossing my belongings in every direction, digging Bella out. When her face finally emerged, she was breathing raggedly and searching the room for my face.

I froze as she spoke the words that sealed my fate. "You rotten cheat."

And then she burst out laughing.

OOOOOOOOO

We'd been sitting on the floor for a half hour, doing very little other than laughing. I must admit that, embarrassing as the situation was, I was glad for Bella to know about the pack rat side of me. It was, after all, her fault; last spring-cleaning day, I had missed her so much that I'd been unable to get rid of the many things I'd suddenly accumulated – the many things that reminded me of her. I told her this.

"The crazy thing," Bella replied, "was that I knew that you weren't completely honest with me over some things, but really, it's perfectly okay – even expected – for a teenage boy to be more than a little messy."

"I'm truly sorry," I said, before falling into a laughing fit again. Bella had picked up a tie-dye t-shirt, and from the look on her face I'm sure she was remembering the tale Rosalie had spun earlier.

"Would you like it?" I asked breathing heavily from the laughter, "Tie-dye is everyone's color."

"How about not," Bella scrunched up her nose and moved to put it in a black bag.

"You could sleep in it." I suggested, rather suddenly. Bella tilted her head in confusion.

"For the nights when I'm gone, hunting or such," I explained. It was an odd high school tradition – the boy giving his girlfriend a token of his affection, but I could suddenly understand wanting her to hold onto a piece of my life – the way she held onto my entire being.

Bella nodded as she set the shirt aside. "I think that's the only thing I've been given today that I truly like."

"Except that it's tie-dye," I said. After the prank I had pulled on Rosalie years ago, a second tie-dye shirt had been passed around the family; every Christmas, the current holder would present it to another family member. No one wanted it, and I was sure that no one else would mind if it retired into Bella's hands.

"The only person that sees me sleep, aside from yourself, is Charlie – and he still thinks that tie-dye is 'in.'" She explained, "I'm all set."

We worked in silence for a few minutes, before Bella turned to me – I battled the overwhelming scent of her swinging hair – and asked, "What's this?"

She held a C.D., the case slightly cracked from its earlier tumble, adorned with the faces of five eager British pop stars.

"You told me once that you listened to the Spice Girls in elementary school," I explained, before a joke hit me, "and, you know, I had a bit of a thing for Posh spice – but she's married anyway."

"You're too funny," Bella shook her head, a smile playing across her perfect lips, as she stood up, "And you shouldn't be ashamed of this – put it in your racks."

I obliged, finding it a home with the rest of the 90s pop. "Whipped!" I heard from down the hall – Emmett must have been listening. I chose to ignore the comment.

"What other embarrassing things do you own?" She asked, jokingly searching the room.

"Well," I pretended to look thoughtful, before handing her a pair of oversized bug-eyed sunglasses. "I wore these once upon a time."

Bella held them away from her as if they smelled of manure, before stuffing them into a black bag. "What else?"

I laughed. "I think I'm next in line to hold our insanely large comic book collection."

"Like the one Jasper piled into my passenger seat?" She asked.

"Yes!" I cried, jumping up and startling her. I sat back down, slowly, and explained, "Carlisle started that collection years ago, and we all got really into it. Now, we're just sick of them, but a little scared to get rid of all the hard work."

"Wow." Bella said, her mouth hanging open. "Though, that doesn't really explain why Emmett's jeep is currently being filled with the remainder of your family's hand-me-downs."

"They're just a little enthusiastic, is all." I explained. "We normally give to a charity, but I guess this year we're mixing it up a little."

"So I'm a charity case now?" Bella was irritated. I decided to use the extent of my vampire charm.

"We just care about you. We want to spoil you – just let us have our fun." I breathed into her face, almost making her faint.

"You're not very fair." She complained, after regaining her senses. "You know what that does to me."

We finished clearing up the room, and I moved the black bags to the dumpster we'd rented. When I returned, I found Bella in the closet, perusing a stack of books.

"I read as many books as I could by every author that you said you liked." I explained, reading her expression. "You have good taste."

"Yes I do," she teased, reaching up to kiss my cheek. "I can't believe you did that for me."

"Eternity is pretty boring," I joked. My afterlife had been anything but boring after Bella had barreled her way into my heart.

"Are you going to try to give me anything else," she asked, "or am I free to go home and start finding various charitable causes throughout the state?"

I knew exactly what I wanted to give her. The fact that I'd purchased her a car for her eighteenth birthday had managed to slip by her radar.

"I believe that your truck," I layered extra disdain on the word, "will be lucky if it makes it home tonight. I have four cars, and I cannot exactly drive them all simultaneously…"

"Rosalie has been kind enough to take on the challenge this summer," she explained, "of improving my truck."

"Well, you're going to need transportation," I coaxed. "I have one very simple car, stylish but safe – you might like it."

"Alice already told me that you bought me a car," Bella spoke in a scornful voice, "even though I asked you not to."

"We could keep it here," I almost pleaded. The possibilities for injury that her truck presented were endless. I shuddered at the thought.

Bella looked me in the eye, as if she might wear me down. Ironically though, I could tell that my own eyes were weakening her resolve, and she finally conceded.

"Just while Rosalie is working on my truck."

I smiled. Bella didn't realize that it would take my sister a long time to acquire the parts needed for such an ancient vehicle. She'd be driving the sporty little blue Audi for a long time.

Author's Note: I hope that this chapter was up to par – it's the longest yet, and it's not only Edward's closet but also his point of view. Did I do his character justice? Coming soon: the epilogue – back at Bella's house.