A month had passed since Mayu's funeral.
Hatori was working regularly again.
Hatori hadn't seen Kana since the funeral, but that was okay with him.
Nowadays, he spent much of his time, alone, in his office, working, doing research. He avoided the younger Sohma family members, because he did not wish to kill their enjoyment of life.
Though most everyone, except Shigure, was giving him a wide berth nowadays, Hatori did not think the way he chose to grieve was unusual or excessive. He had always been solitary, not simply because of the curse, but because it was part of his nature.
Shigure, smartly and perceptively as he could be on occasion, came over to keep Hatori company, but was unusually quiet when he did so. And Hatori was grateful…especially since he knew Shigure wouldn't shut up forever.
Hatori was grieving, but he was also recovering.
His grief for Mayu was different than from when his relationship with Kana had ended. That had been traumatic for so many reasons, because of his guilt, because of her depression, her illness. Because he had had to erase her memories and watch her walk away without remember everything they had been together.
Compared to that, his grief for Mayu was simple. He had loved her, and he mourned her loss. But it was not as complex or as wretched as the torment that he had gone through after Kana.
He was sad for Mayu's sake that her life had ended so abruptly, because Mayu deserved to live. Mayu was a good person. Mayu should have lived.
He grieved for Mayu. But he did not grieve as much for himself, or for the future that had been lost to them.
Maybe because his world had been okay before he realized she was in it. Boring, maybe. Solitary. It hadn't been a happy existence. But it hadn't been a sad one either.
And now that she was gone, his world hadn't collapsed…it had simply gone back to what it was before, that strange, in-between existence of non-happiness, non-sadness, without grief for the past and without hope for the future.
He tried to make himself feel guilty for not feeling as hopeless about the future after Mayu had died, as he had felt after Kana had left.
But he had to admit that losing Kana had been so hard because he thought she was the only one who could ever love him.
Losing Mayu did not leave him with that feeling.
Especially since Kana was still alive.
Hatori stomped all such thoughts out of his head and went back to work.