The Roy Mustang Guide to Dates With Riza Hawkeye

A/N: Yes, I purposely waited to post. My Royai day present to you all: a new chapter-thingy! Again, OOC, but I've decided to pick my battles. If it's gonna come out OOC, nothing I do will change it. Well, I lied, but that's beside the point.

Dates had to be more like casual get-togethers. Well, between military personnel, anyway. Nobody knew why there was that stupid fraternization rule, but it was there, and it was not going to be let up anytime soon.

So, as a first date, a casual walk in the park followed by Roy cooking dinner was decided upon, mostly because Roy had been treated to a great deal of Riza's baking. That, however, was only because he would sneak into her lunch when she was out of the office.

Then she had caught him one day and had sighed and mumbled something about just asking next time, though he received a mysterious invoice for several new targets at the firing range the next day. It seemed that rather than venting to him, she had vented on six targets, none of which were usable, let alone recognizable.

She really had not spoken to him much for the next few days until he had apologized for taking her cookies. When he had suggested making her food, she could not really say no and mean it.

Much as Roy would have liked to have seen Riza dressed up just for him (though really, she could wear just about anything and still be beautiful, as cliché as it sounded), it was not the right place for such things. Still, a casual skirt and shirt was very nice, and showed more curves than that stupid uniform.

He had met her in the park, as per their agreement, while she was walking Hayate. After a couple of times around the small pond at the center, they had slowly gone in the direction of Roy's apartment, looking not like a couple, but just friends.

Once there, Roy started working. He quickly prepared a salad and some noodles with a sauce –almost a stew- that had been passed down through his family, so he claimed. At any rate, it seemed edible, and she was hungry.

"Passable?" Roy asked, watching her expression carefully.

"You're not giving yourself more credit than is due?" Riza deadpanned. When Roy blanched, she rolled her eyes, a tiny smile forming. "I like it; don't worry so much."

"I worry because you're not like anyone else," Roy explained, "you know, obsessed with me being a hero and not giving a damn about my cooking. 'Course, I can take anyone else out to a restaurant, but everyone seems to think that you and I…"

"Lest you forget, we are," Riza reminded him gently.

Roy let a smile sneak onto his face. "Never thought the day would come when you'd say that, did you?"

Riza let that one go simply with a look that said, Don't make me seem desperate. "Not really. And you?"

Not entirely prepared to be asked, and even kicking himself for hoping that she would not ask, he stumbled over his words for a second or two. "Well… I… hoped. It was more kind of a 'come hell or high water, I'll find some way to do this' type of thing."

Sounds like him. I have to remind myself that that's the attitude he applies to that goal, too. And that's the attitude I have to have about helping him. I suppose this situation makes me more likely to help, but if that fails… Riza shuddered involuntarily.

"Are you alright?" Roy shot her a worried look.

"I'm fine. An unpleasant memory popped into my head, that's all," Riza explained.

Hayate had trotted over, though, and whined worriedly as he poked his nose into the hand that hung down to pet him.

"I'm fine," she assured the dog.

The dog did not let up for a moment, though. It took a couple pats and another reassurance, though by this point, she was not sure who she was reassuring: Hayate, Roy, or herself.

There was about five minutes of a silence that would have been awkward if they had not been eating. Still, the covert glances they snuck at each other, despite the fact that there was nobody else around to make fun of them for it, were enough to make them uncomfortable.

"So, what would you like to do?" Roy asked as they finished.

Riza began clearing the plates. "There doesn't seem to be much to do."

Roy followed her out to the kitchen. "Well, you're not going to clean. The last time we mixed you and cleaning at my apartment, it didn't quite work."

"It won't happen again. How much trouble can I get into washing two plates?" Riza asked as she turned on the water and grabbed the sponge.

"Do you want me to take that as a dare?" Roy questioned suggestively, wrapping his arms around her from behind.

"Keep your hands where they are and I might consider it." Riza's voice stayed even enough, but, when Roy caught her reflection in the window, she looked a little pink.

"Yes ma'am," he murmured into her ear.

All things considered, he was patient, though he knew that he would get shot (or slapped or yelled at, or something) if he was not. It was then that he realized that if he kept his hands where they were, it would not be a dare. He cursed mentally, but knew that if he was going to go anywhere with this, it was going to be at her pace, not his. It was not that he wanted sex then and there (at least, not enough to make it a problem), but it was frustrating to be in the situation they were in.

She turned around inside his grasp, signifying that she was done. Noticing the expression on his face, she asked, "Roy, is something wrong?"

"It can't be helped- don't worry." Roy pulled her into a kiss, banishing the thought from his mind. Anyway, if there was one girl he had ever wanted to get this frustrated over, it was her. Riza Hawkeye, the most capable, attractive, wonderful, and, yes, caring woman he had met was very worth it.

END!

A/N: Please review! It makes me happy to see the hit counter go up, but I want to know what you think! I'm not psychic, I'm not a psychiatrist, and I'm not a brain surgeon. You need to let me know what's going through your head when you read this! Even if it's random, like that you... dunno... like baking ham... or something.

OMAKE TIME! My big bro came up with the framework for this one. It's lame, I know, but it was funny at the time!

Random guy: Whoa. Hawkeye's hot

Roy: (Pissed off) And you're gonna be even hotter! (Snaps)

R.G.: (Runs away, squealing and on fire)