July:
Sometimes for Santana, the whole Brittany situation felt like whiplash. After the reunion, they stopped watching TV together at night, they started following the rules again, they just co-parented without any of the weird stuff between them. Santana wasn't sure if it was good or bad, she wasn't sure if she loved it or hated it, she just kind of felt like nothing was ever going to be right as long as this was the situation they were in. And even still, she didn't think they'd be right being involved romantically, things were severely broken, mainly her heart, and she finally made plans to take Wendy out again, just wanting to get away from Brittany. She went on a bunch of dates, always on nights where she didn't pick the kids up at school and always on nights where she had already promised Ava the next night would be extra special.
Because it was summer vacation, when Santana worked from home, she stopped working early in order to get Ava from camp. Brittany had arranged her classes around getting her on the days that she couldn't and the afternoon after her date with Wendy, she was excited to see Ava since she hadn't seen her since the morning before. Before she got Ava, she picked JJ up at daycare and strapped him into his car seat, then drove to Ava's day camp. When she pulled up, she spotted Ava with her pigtails in the crowd and Santana smiled widely. Something about that kid just made her happy no matter how sad and mixed up she felt inside. Ava jumped up and down excitedly when she noticed Santana and the counselor opened up the door for her so she could get in the car. Santana leaned back and helped her with her buckle, then kissed her on the nose.
"I missed you, kiddo."
"I missed you too! I have to tell you all about all of the stuff I did at camp and then help you cook dinner! Are you staying home tonight?"
"I am, just like I promised."
"Do you have a new girlfriend, Aunt Santana? Are you gonna kiss her?"
"She's not quite my girlfriend, Aves, but I like hanging out with her."
"More than you like hanging out with me?"
"Never." Santana smiled, turning around the drive them home. "There's no one I'm ever going to like hanging out with more than I like hanging out with you."
"Aunt Santana?"
"Yeah."
"Georgianna got a dog. Can I get a dog?"
"Dog! Dog! Dog!" JJ yelled from his car seat, making Santana laugh every time he acquired a new word by listening to Ava.
"I think a dog is a lot of work, and neither Aunt Brittany or I have much time for that right now."
"Can we go to the dog store and just look at them? Mommy used to let me."
Those words always cut straight through Santana's heart and she couldn't say no. She was pretty sure, knowing Cassidy, that they went to the pound rather than a puppy store, so she looked up the closest animal shelter on her phone and drove there. Ava was singing happily in the back seat, making JJ laugh as she did, and it made Santana feel good to see the kids in such good spirits. She pulled into the parking lot and Ava yelled that it was the same place she went to with Cass, so Santana felt like she was absolutely doing the right thing. Sometimes it felt like everything she did was about keeping Cass and John alive for Ava, but deep within her heart of hearts, Santana felt like that was the most right thing she could possibly do.
"Look at this one! Look at this one!" Ava hung on the bars of one of the cages, where a small terrier lay on the floor. "Aunt Santana, she's so sad!"
"She does look pretty sad, doesn't she?" Santana shifted JJ on her hip and ruffled Ava's hair.
"If you tell the lady we want to play with her, we're allowed!"
"For ten minutes, okay? We have to go home and get started on dinner."
"Okay, ten whole minutes!"
The worker at the animal shelter took the dog out of the pen and she brought her into a little room. Santana told Ava not to put her face near the dog and she let JJ stand up, keeping a close eye on both of them in case the dog wasn't as nice as she seemed. But immediately after they settled down, the dog perked right up and she came over to Ava, licking her hand. Then, though Santana wasn't exactly a dog person, the dog came right over to her and licked her face, making her laugh in a way she hadn't expected. The dog was probably the sweetest thing she'd ever seen and the way Ava smiled just made Santana feel some kind of way.
"Aunt Santana! She loves us! She loves us!" Ava cried out as JJ took a fist full of the dog's fur and she laid down at his feet. "Please, please, please can we take her to our house?"
"Ava—"
"Please Aunt Santana? I want to keep her so, so bad! She's a good dog! And Aunt Brittany loves dogs!"
Looking at both Ava's face and the dog's face, Santana realized she couldn't say no. Maybe Brittany was right, she was absolutely powerless when it came to Ava, but Ava was also right, Brittany did love dogs and she thought it would be perfectly fine if they brought this sweet girl home. She probably should have called her, but she knew she was at work anyway and wouldn't be able to answer. It would be fine, Santana figured, she'd deal with the repercussions, and before she knew it, she was signing papers. Once everything was finished, Ava was grinning from ear to ear as they put the dog in the backseat of the car between her and JJ and Santana really felt like she had made the best choice she could ever possibly make.
"I want to call her Daisy because that's like Daisy Duck!"
"Daisy." Santana laughed. "I like that."
"I'm going to help you walk her and feed her and cuddle her! She's mine, right Aunt Santana?"
"I think she's more like a family dog, Aves, since JJ might want to share her with you when he's a little bit bigger but she's definitely part yours."
"I can't wait to call Georgianna and tell her! Can I call her on the phone? Please, please?"
"You definitely can, but after we have dinner, okay?"
"Okay!"
Brittany was already home when they pulled into the driveway and Ava was anxious to get Daisy out of the car and into the house. Santana unbuckled JJ first, then she hooked Daisy's leash to her and opened the door for Ava. She squealed with delight when Santana let her hold onto the leash, but when they got to the door, Brittany was out on the front steps and did not look happy. Santana swallowed hard, knowing that this was going to be like their frequent ice cream conversations only worse and she immediately realized that as much as she thought she could deal with the repercussions of her decision, maybe she wasn't.
"Aunt Brittany! Look! It's Daisy! Our dog!"
"I didn't know we had a dog." Brittany forced a smile for Ava, but the way she looked at Santana could kill. "Ava, honey, why don't you go inside and wash your hands?"
"Daisy! Come with me!" Ava pulled on the leash and she disappeared inside with the dog trailing behind her.
"You have got to be kidding me right now." Brittany lowered her voice and narrowed her eyes at Santana. "You got her a dog without even thinking about talking to me?"
"Why should I have talked to you when you were just going to end up saying no?"
"Um, I don't know, because I live here too and am going to have to share the responsibility with you?"
"No one's asking you to do anything, Brittany. I'll take care of the damn dog."
"That's not even the point." Brittany shook her head. "We've had this conversation before, you just give into everything she wants and I'm trying to maintain some sense of order around here."
"Right, I'm the terrible parent."
"What's even up with you lately? I thought we were becoming friends and then suddenly you don't even look at me."
"Is this about us being friends or about the dog? Make up your mind."
"It's about communication. You're not communicating with me about anything and now you come home with a dog. A phone call would have been nice."
"So take her back."
"Right." Brittany rolled her eyes. "Because that won't make me the meanest person in the world if I take away the dog that you told Ava she could have."
"I didn't go to the animal shelter with the plan of bringing home a dog. I did it because Ava said Cass used to take her."
"And managed to never bring home a dog!"
"Stop fighting! You're not supposed to fight! Aunt Santana promised!" Ava screamed, standing in the doorway. "You're makin' me and Daisy sad! Aunt Brittany, are you gonna take Daisy away from me?"
"I'm not going to take Daisy away from you, Ava. You don't have to worry about that." Brittany sighed, looking down at Ava and the dog. Then, she looked back up at Santana and whispered, "I'm not done with this conversation."
The tension was so thick it could be cut with a knife the whole night and after the kids were in bed, Santana really wanted to just hide in her bedroom and avoid any sort of conversation. But Brittany ended up knocking on her door and Santana was shocked by that. She'd never actually done that before and it felt really weird as Santana trudged to the door and opened it. Brittany was standing there with her arms crossed over her chest and Santana took a deep breath.
"We can't fight with the kids sleeping." Santana put her hands up to stop the incoming barrage of criticism.
"I am more than capable of having an adult conversation with my voice at a reasonable volume."
"Don't you understand that I'm just trying to make this kid happy? JJ doesn't remember them probably already but Ava misses them so much and so what if we have a dog to help fill a hole in her life."
"It's not so what, Santana. Adults have conversations about big things like this. What happens when she's a teenager and she decides she wants to date, are you just going to let her go out with someone without talking to me."
"Oh, please, we were sleeping together when we were fifteen."
"Why do you always have to bring up our past whenever I'm just trying to have a conversation about something unrelated?"
"You're not trying to have a conversation. You're trying to make me feel bad. Well guess what? I don't. Goodnight, Brittany."
"You can't just say goodnight when you don't want to talk about things. You keep doing that."
"I can do whatever I want."
"Oh, real mature. Are you going to stick your fingers in your ears too?"
"You're one to talk."
"Excuse me." Brittany crossed her arms over her chest.
"You only want to talk when you think you're going to win an argument. Whatever, you want to be right, you're right. I shouldn't have gotten the dog, but now it's too late."
"I'm not having this conversation to try to be right. I'm trying to talk to you so we can be better parents together."
"Whatever, I'm not in the mood tonight."
"That's not how it works."
"It's how it works for me." Santana stepped back, considering closing the door.
"I really don't want to fight with you. I just want you to recognize what I'm trying to say."
"I get it, okay. You're the responsible one, I'm the irresponsible one. You win, I lose."
"Seriously Santana, what's up with you?"
"Nothing's up, this is just who I am. You know, shitty. You decided that two years ago."
"This isn't about us."
"Isn't it always?"