im gonna collapse from not getting up from this seat in a whole hour to write this, but ohwell. enjoy it.
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You've made life too hard to live anymore, Johnnycake.
Its hard to go out on the street, and something here, or something there just reminds me, us, all of us, the gang, it reminds us of you.
Little puppy dogs, with beady eyes that light up the world. Gone with the Wind. You know, just the small things.
And its just the small things like a fire in the city that make us all wonder why it was you. Why not any of one us, dead in your spot…
And honest-to-god Johnny, im trying really hard to move on. Its just really hard when there are so many little things.
Especially when all the little things add up to what we had.
What was there…
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Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, and before I knew it, Johnny was showing up less & less at the park, as the year went by.
Still, I'd go down there every day, just for a hopeful glimpse of him. But after time, I began to give up hope in general. No Johnny for 2 years.
And by the time I was 14, I had nearly forgotten about Johnny Cade. Till one day, I was in the park, that same old park, just sitting there, and I saw a figure in a jean jacket go by.
I told myself it couldn't be him, could NOT be the same boy from 2 years ago. He had changed definitely, from the fact that his hair looked…for lack of a better word, greasy from a distance. His walking stance had changed too, and I honestly wanted to know what the hell had happened to him.
He was walking awfully fast, and my attempts to keep up with him were failing. So out of desperation, and probably from the sheer fact that it was actually HIM, I called out his name, causing him to turn around and look at me.
He probably didn't recognize me from the way his facial expression was. He was eyeing me up and down, quickly, before taking a step towards me, and asking, "Do I…know you?"
"We used to talk here…" I said, sighing. This was stupid of me. The kid hardly knew who I was anymore. There was no point in even trying…
"…wait, hold on a sec, I think I remember you…" he told me, probably racking his brain for the answer to who I was. "I got it!" he said, after a minute or so of silence between us. "Your that Ali girl, right?"
I nodded, smiling at him. The kid wasn't so bad, even though from the looks of it, he had become a greaser. It was easy to understand, wit h what he told me about his parents, but at the same time, it was hard to believe that innocent little Johnny could become this. He looked so… different.
"Well, listen…" he said, looking over his shoulder real quick, before continuing, "Im going to a friends place, and I'll feel awfully bad if I just leave you here, because I know we haven't talked in a while…I'm sure that everyone wont mind if you come along. So how about it?"
His friends? They would probably try and jump me for all I know. I wasn't too familiar with the greaser crowd, so it was a scary image in my mind. But if Johnny was around, I was sure they couldn't be that bad.
"Why not?" I told him with a forced, fake smile, as I joined him on the walk towards wherever-the-hell-we-were-going. I could only hope it wasn't too far.
And when we arrived at the destination, I could hear a muffled sound of music. The door was wide open, and when Johnny called out that he was there, a figure came over to talk to him. I stood outside the door, not knowing what the hell I was supposed to do.
Johnny then turned around, motioning for me to come into the house. "You alright?" he asked, as I nodded. The house smelled of cigarettes and booze, and I was getting nauseous already. I had drank before, sure, but this was beginning to become overwhelming, this was beginning to make my head spin. And before I knew it, Johnny's figure infront of me was starting to go blurry, and the last thing I heard was him calling out my name, as it echoed in the back of my mind…
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When I came to, everything was quiet, and for a second, I didn't know why the hell I was in someone else's bed, in someone else's house, before I realized that I had followed a boy a year older then me here.
Was I dumb or what?
Rubbing my eyes, I looked around, only to see no Johnny in sight. Smart move, leaving me all alone. It was then I guessed that I was upstairs somewhere, because I heard the sounds of footsteps coming up a set of stairs. I quickly shut my eyes, and tried my best to look the way I did only seconds ago, as the door opened.
"I don't know what happened to her." I heard Johnny's voice say. "She walked in and a few seconds later she went out cold on the floor…"
"You ever think it was the smell of this place, Johnnycake?" Another, deeper voice said to him. Johnnycake. How original. "This girl looked like she's never touched a bit of alcohol in her life. What a shame, she doesn't know what she's missing."
They were silent for a minute, before the same guy talked, again.
"So how do you know this girl, anyways? Was she just your arm candy? How much you pay her to come with you here?" I could've sworn I heard the guy elbow Johnny, but I wasn't sure.
"Shut it." He muttered, through clenched teeth. "I've known her for a few years."
"Oh, is that so?" The guy said, as I heard their voices get farther and farther away, and footsteps going back downstairs. "Little Johnnycake is a ladies man…"
I was too afraid to get up and ask where I was, because it was obvious I wouldn't get an answer.
All I knew was I was about to enter a world different from anything I'd ever experienced before.
And I'd have Johnny Cade right beside me.
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r&r, stay gold, have a good week, kiddos.
