Adam woke up the next day to full sunlight and a stiffness in his body that he couldn't explain for a minute. He tried to sit up, but his muscles didn't want to obey. He slowly realized that he was in his own room, and felt incredibly grateful for that fact. Slowly the events of the last few days began to filter back into his memory, and he let out an involuntary groan.
"Good morning, sleepyhead," said his mother's soft voice. He turned his head to see her sitting in the chair across the room, calmly knitting.
"How did I get here?" he croaked out, his mouth dry and his mind feeling a bit numb.
Marlena quickly got up, and had a straw in his mouth within seconds. "The Sorceress said you were being stubborn, and didn't let her know how much pain you were in. She used a sleep spell on you, and we brought you home." Adam drank greedily for a moment, then glanced at her suspiciously.
"This isn't drugged again, is it?" he asked. "I can't even move as it is."
Marlena shook her head. "That's the leftovers of the Sorceress' spell. She wanted to make sure you rested all night. You can only get out of bed if I allow it. Once I do, the spell's done."
Adam pressed his lips together as resentment boiled up. He'd been through enough the last few days, he didn't need to be hovered over. "Mother, may I?" he asked dryly. His eyes wandered towards the bathroom, and she understood.
"Yes, you may," she answered sweetly, patting his cheek. "Do what you need to, and get right back into bed. I'm going to go have some brunch now. I'm sure Teela will be in soon."
Adam's eyebrow raised as he sat up gingerly. "Mother, I just need rest. I'm not sick or in any danger. I don't need a baby-sitter."
"Who said anything about a baby-sitter? Teela's been in here three times to see if you were awake. She's anxious to see you," his mother chided gently.
"Oh." Marlena kissed the top of his head before she left.
"I'm so relieved you're all right," she told him again. "I've never been more terrified for you."
He grinned at her. "Not even when I fell off the balcony as a kid?" he teased.
"Not even when you were captured by Skeletor," she threw over her shoulder as she left. Adam smirked, wondering which time she meant…of course, she only knew of a few, not the dozens of times Skeletor had captured him as He-Man. Thank the Ancients for friends, he thought. Adam sat there for a moment, gathering his strength, and went to soak in a tub of hot water.
Who would have thought this could feel so good? His strained muscles relaxed a little. His eyes closed, his mind drifted. Bodies surrounded him. The ground was covered in blood. As he walked, he recognized the bodies of Ram-Man, Man-E-Faces, Stratos, Buzz-Off, and all of the other Masters. He cried out at the sight of Orko, Battle Cat, Duncan, Teela, his parents, even Adora…all dead.
Adam jerked upright, sloshing water everywhere, gasping for breath. He buried his face in his hands. He'd always feared losing out to Skeletor, failing his family, his friends, and all of Eternia. But having a mental picture of it was so much worse.
Feelings as if his responsibilities were physical weights weighing him down, Adam slowly dried off and got dressed. In spite of his morose thoughts, it still felt wonderful to have clean clothes on again. He came out of the bathroom still drying his hair, and paused in the doorway. Teela had been looking out his window and whirled around as he came out. Their eyes clashed for a moment, each reflecting the loneliness, confusion, and longing in the other's. Then she ran across the room and threw herself into his arms, almost knocking them both over.
"Hey, didn't we have this greeting yesterday?" he teased her, surprised. She kept her face buried in his shoulder as she began to speak.
"I'm so sorry, Adam. It was all my fault. I should have protected you better. Please forgive me." Her voice was breaking. She wouldn't raise her face, and he knew that Teela, his tower of strength since they were kids, was crying…over him.
He pushed her firmly away and tilted her chin up until she met his eyes. "Teela, you have nothing, nothing, to be sorry for. You did what you were supposed to. You investigated a potential threat. You had no way of knowing it was a set-up." He wrapped her in his arms again, pulling her close. "Besides, Granamyr said there are only a few people on Eternia who could have survived that spell. I'm betting you might be one of them Teela, but what if you aren't? I would have lost you," he said tenderly.
"Better the captain of the guard should die than the prince," she whispered, pulling away. He grabbed her arm before she could turn away completely, and their eyes met again. She was shocked by the raw pain and determination she saw in his eyes.
"Better I should die than my best friend," Adam replied hoarsely. They stared at each other for a full minute, Adam gradually pushing the image of his friends' bodies out of his mind. Teela was watched in awe as his face suddenly turned blank, as if he'd turned off his emotions.
Adam walked away from her, fighting to regain control. He'd never felt so overwhelmed and on edge, and he knew it was the aftereffects of all he'd been through. He propped a few pillows up on the bed and half-laid, half-sat on it. Teela went around to the other side and sat next to him. He stared straight ahead, refusing to meet her gaze, until her hand reached over and touched his cheek.
"Talk to me, Adam. You've always been there for me. I know I've really given you a hard time in the last few years, but I can tell something's really wrong. What is it?" she asked
Adam swallowed hard. He needed to tell someone. Adora would be best, but it would most likely be a few days before she returned. Duncan should be his next choice, but…Teela was here, asking, and he found that he wanted to explain it to her. Teela waited in silence.
"In order to break the spell, I had to face some of my worst fears," he finally said. "I had to re-live the night that boy was killed by the earthquake in Rock Haven." Teela paled when he said this, but he wasn't looking at her. Instead, he stared hard at a small black spot on his wall.
"It took what really happened and made it worse. My father disowned me. You…well, our friendship was over." Adam's voice was so low she had to lean in to hear it. "The next fear was even more horrible. Hordak kidnapping my children, holding my wife hostage. But the last…" His voice broke, and Teela slipped an arm around his shoulders.
Adam took a deep breath, knowing he had to finish now that he'd started. "You were all dead," he whispered. "You, Mother, Father, Adora, Duncan, Orko…everyone of the masters. Skeletor had taken over Grayskull, and he was about to rule the universe. And it was my fault. I had failed to stop him." He rubbed at his eyes, swiping away the tears that threatened to fall and Teela hugged him hard. He took a ragged breath.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to dump all that on you," he whispered.
Teela smiled at him. "What are best friends for?" she asked, her tone still gentle. She was confused by his words. No one would ever expect Adam to be the one to stop Skeletor, so why was he thinking of it as his responsibility? She didn't know what else to say, so she just held him until he fell asleep again, comforted by her presence.
Adam woke an hour later, his head pounding. Teela was gone, but his father was entering, followed by one of the servants, who carried a tray of food. Adam suddenly realized he hadn't eaten since he'd been blasted by Skeletor, three days ago. His mouth watered eagerly.
"Thank you, Gwen," he nodded to the servant as she placed the tray down next to him on a small table. "How's Roger doing?"
The young blond blushed. "He's doing well, Your Highness. He proposed last week."
"That's wonderful! Congratulations!" Adam said enthusiastically. She cast a nervous glance at his father, who had watched this in thoughtful silence, bowed and left. Adam took a bite of the brown bread with melted butter and closed his eyes in ecstasy.
"You must be careful not to get too personal with the staff, Adam," his father cautioned mildly. "It could cause rumors."
Adam's emotions were still raw; his normally mild temper flared. He took his time chewing to give himself time to calm down. "I don't think it's wrong to be friendly with them, Father," he finally said, matching Randor's tone. "They are people, just like you and me."
His father sighed. "Adam, I don't want to cause an argument. I'm just trying to say that you need to be kind and polite, but reserved. You have the unique ability to draw people out, and it does you credit. I just don't want to see that turned against you by some bitter rival for the throne."
Adam perked up. "Rival? Is there something I should know about?"
Randor waved a hand, and some of his typical impatience with his son crept into his voice. "No, no, no. Surely you know that there are always those of power who want to take over the throne. It's nothing specific right now, just always...there." Adam nodded slowly, taking another bite of the bread.
"Adam, Granamyr..." his father began. He stopped, then started again. "Granamyr said your first fear was about me." Adam nearly choked on his food. Staring at his father, he was struck by the sadness he saw there. "Why?"
Adam looked down, fiddling with his untouched soup for a moment. I should have known this was coming, he realized. He didn't want to have this conversation, but after a few moments it was obvious that there would be no timely intervention by his mother, Teela, or even Skeletor this time. He sighed heavily.
"I know I've been a big disappointment to you, Father," he admitted in a low voice. His eyes met his father's, then dropped back down. "It's often occurred to me that you might prefer to have Adora take the throne, or someone else, and to be honest, that doesn't really bother me all that much." He paused, gathering his courage, Randor watching him intently. "What does bother me is the thought that one day, you might be so disappointed in me, so angry, that you disown me." And, given the fact that He-Man's duties will always have to come first, it's actually a very real possibility, he added silently.
"Oof," Adam gasped as he found himself pulled up into a bear hug.
"I know I've been...demanding, and often harsh," Randor admitted to his son, his tone also low. "I'm afraid that's not going to stop. It's my job to get you ready to take the throne, and I'm going to do my best to do that. But I hope you know that I...I love you, son. I've never been so scared in my life as when I saw you lying on that platform, and Duncan said you were dead."
"You thought I was dead?" Adam pulled back, eyes wide and searching his father's face.
Randor nodded miserably, and Adam was shocked to see tears standing in his father's eyes. "You had no pulse. It was the worst few seconds of my life."
"I-I knew my life was in danger, but I didn't realize…" Adam's voice drifted off. In all his time as He-Man, he'd never come that close to death. How ironic that he'd almost died as plain old Adam.
Randor gave his son another hard hug, then stood up and walked over to the window to compose himself. Neither of them knew what to say.
Randor stayed until Adam finished his meal. There wasn't a lot of conversation, but for once neither of them was uncomfortable with that. Randor kept staring at Adam, thankful just to have him alive, and slowly realizing that he knew very little about his son. Adam was grateful beyond words for his father's candor; for the first time since he became He-Man he felt that he knew where he stood with the king. He had serious doubts about it lasting beyond the next time he had to run off to become He-Man, but he buried those thoughts and let himself dwell on his father's words.
As his father left, Duncan came in, much to Adam's relief. No one else but Orko knew exactly why he was in such a horrid condition, and it would be nice not to have to watch what he said.
"How are you feeling, Adam? And don't sugarcoat it," Duncan warned, taking a seat in the chair next too the bed. "The Sorceress told me you hid it well, even from her, as to the kind of shape you were in, and she has no qualms about using a mind spell to find out exactly what's going on."
Adam grimaced. He was already lying down, but he didn't want to be forced to do so again. "Sometimes I think you two are worse than my parents," he complained.
"If your parents knew what you do during your 'free' time, they'd be even worse than the Sorceress and I are," Duncan countered.
"Interesting you should say that," Adam drawled, trying to change the subject. He told Duncan what the Sorceress had said about his parents and Teela.
"I'm sure she's right," the older warrior grunted. "But you didn't answer my question. How are you feeling? Obviously well enough to try to distract me."
Adam grinned a little. "Can't blame a guy for trying." Duncan glared at him. "Oh, all right. I'm exhausted, and it hurts to do anything. I feel like I strained every muscle in my body."
Duncan nodded. "You and I haven't had a chance to talk, but between the Sorceress, Orko, and Teela, I think I have an idea of what you went through. I'm surprised that battle with Skeletor yesterday didn't set you back more, actually." Adam said nothing. "Adam? Did you get hurt yesterday?"
"No, I just…I had a hard time eating without sloshing soup all over myself," he admitted. "I couldn't even raise the Power Sword yesterday." His eyes drifted closed as he yawned. "It's not easy being this weak when you're used to being He-Man. It would be depressing, if I were awake enough to be depressed," he finished softly.
Man-at-Arms watched the prince sleep for a few minutes. He'd hoped Adam would talk more about the whole thing. The Sorceress had told him that Kaspanya's spell could cause a lot of emotional turmoil for Adam, as it had given a picture to his worst fears. Worse yet, she wasn't entirely sure if it was completely defeated. The crystal had captured the magic aimed from the talisman, but a small portion of it, she believed, had remained on He-Man. If so, it wasn't powerful enough for her to detect, but it could grow stronger. Only time would tell. But it was her last statement that had truly frightened him.
Adam woke, gasping for air. He'd been dreaming, and in his dream, Hordak had killed his two beautiful little girls. He had held them as they died. He looked down at his hands, half-expecting to see them covered in blood. Cringer, sleeping next to the bed, rolled over and started purring. Adam couldn't help but smile. Cringer always purred when he sensed Adam was distressed. It felt good to know he wasn't alone.
A tray of food had been left for him, and he sat at the chair near his window while he ate. He was annoyed to find that he was already worn out by the time he was done eating. If Skeletor attacks anytime soon, he may achieve his goal of killing me, Adam thought wryly. He-Man's heroics are taking a toll on my body.
Nevertheless, he decided, he had to get out of his room for a few minutes. He could surely make it down the hall and back, just to stretch his legs a little. He was no more than ten feet down the hallway when he heard a voice from behind.
"Just where do you think you're going?"
Adam stopped guiltily and turned around. "Teela! What are you doing up here?"
"Checking on you," she answered, hands on her hips. "You didn't answer my question."
"Just taking a short stroll," he assured her. "I've been cooped up in that room all day."
"Adam, you've been assigned bed rest, and that's what you need to do," Teela snapped at him, worry in her eyes.
"Teela, I'm fine. I'll go rest in a few minutes," he argued.
"You might overdo it! You should be resting!" Her voice was growing louder.
"Teela, I-"
"Get back in bed and go to sleep!" she insisted.
The irony of it suddenly hit Adam, and he started laughing, which caused his stomach muscles to protest. He doubled over, but couldn't stop laughing.
"Adam! Adam, what's wrong?" Teela cried. She bent down to try to see his face; he finally wound up sitting on the floor, tears streaming down his face from the pain in his sides, but he still couldn't stop. He knew it wasn't quite that funny, but the emotional release felt so good.
"Are you laughing? Adam?" Teela was getting more concerned, and he tried to stop long enough to explain it to her.
"You're…telling ME…to go to sleep," he finally choked out. "After all…the times…you've yelled at me…for napping!"
Teela began to chuckle, which sent him laughing harder, and finally she joined in, sitting beside him on the floor and wrapping her arms around him.
"Okay, you win," she finally said, wiping the tears from her eyes. "We'll go down the hall and back, but I'm walking with you."
Adam shook his head. "No need. I just used every bit of energy I had on laughing. I'll be lucky to make it to my room."
"Well, it's a good thing I came down here to see what the noise was about, then," came Duncan's voice. Adam looked up to see his mentor standing there. "Care to tell me what was so funny?"
"You just had to be here, Father," Teela said, standing up quickly. She smiled down at Adam. "Let's get you back to bed."
Adam gritted his teeth, took the hand Duncan offered him, and forced himself up. Duncan watched his face closely and was ready when a wave of dizziness caused the prince's knees to buckle. He grabbed Adam, and Teela quickly held him up on the other side.
"I'm sorry," Adam whispered. Teela and Duncan responded, but he didn't hear them. Exhaustion seeped in and he fell asleep as soon as he got into the bed.
"I'm sorry Father," Teela said quietly. "He was out in the hallway, wanting to go for a walk, when I found him. I tried to get him back to bed, which he thought was funny, and the next thing I knew, we were both sitting on the floor, hysterical."
Duncan's lips twitched. "I can see how Adam would get a kick out of that, given your normal attitude towards him." Teela smacked him lightly, and they left the room.