"Guilty," Riley smiles taking a sip of black coffee as he reads the newspaper with a big black headline that reads Ellusive Woman Finally Caught. He rubs the back of my hand with his thumb careful not to touch the silver-dollar sized bruise stretched across my thumb to pinky. "You were mighty brave in there, Sam."
I glance up shyly from under my blonde bangs shrugging off the compliment. "I don't know what I would've done if you weren't there."
"Believe it or not, you are strong" He says letting the paper fall across the table. A close-up of Nukpana's face makes me glance away. Her eyes seem to pierce my soul with a familiar coldness. He crumples up the newspaper throwing it over his shoulder where it lands perfectly in the trashcan.
"We almost died," I hiccup looking down at my bruise. It's going to take awhile to get over everything.
"Shh..Sammy," He rounds the kitchen table, pulling me into his chest. "I know it's hard, but we're gonna make it, okay? I won't let anything happen."
It's a stupid promise, a breakable one. Riley can fight anything and anyone. But he can't fight Death. It's coming for us sooner or later. For Austin, it's already come. Only three days after Nukpana's sentence and he died in surgery. There was no doubt I loved him, but towards the end I shunned him. I am filled with a shame that I can never shake. Riley doesn't even know what I really think of myself.
I sob harder because I didn't have a chance to say goodbye. I didn't have a chance to say that I fell out of love with him while at the same time fell into it with another man. Maybe that's a good thing, though. He died thinking that I had the same love with him as he did with me. That's not true. I've never loved Austin as much as he loved me. With Riley, it's different. It's a new kind of love.
"I know this is bad timing and all, but I think if I don't say it now then I'll never get a chance," Riley whispers above me. My thoughts stop circulating as I glance up his now wet t-shirt, up to the eyes of the boy I truly love. He takes a deep breath and stares into my hazel eyes. I watch his lips form each letter like a honey-slow dream. "Will you marry me?"