-1Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate Atlantis or any of its original characters.
Thanks for all of you who have read and reviewed my story so far. I'm glad you like it. I didn't think that anyone would. I didn't update last night because I didn't have time so I figured that I would tonight. There is a little more of Teyla and John in this chapter. I hope I don't disappoint you with it. Please read and tell me what you think.
Later on that day, John had gone out to get some fresh air on one of the balconies. He stood out there so long that it had gotten dark. He was about to leave when the door opened and Teyla walked out.
"Why do you always come out here and sit alone when you have a bad day?" She asked in a friendly voice.
John turned around when he heard her voice. "I was just thinking."
"You spend all this time out here thinking? Why not talk to people?" She asked.
"I like having time alone." John said. He turned away from her and looked out over the balcony. "It gives me time to think about stuff and time to rest."
"Do you not get sick of being alone all the time?" She asked. It effected him more than she expected. He turned around and looked back at her and the look on his face was something she wished she had never seen. It was the saddest look she had ever seen in her life.
"And you know what it's like to be alone?" He said almost in tears.
"To tell you the truth…..I do not know what it is like to be completely alone." She went over to the edge of the balcony and sat down on the floor. "I have always had my people there for me when I needed them. And now I have your people as well. They are all great." She looked up at him and gave him a sad smirk.
He looked back at her for a minute and then sat down beside her. He didn't know how to tell her about how long he was alone. Unlike others there from earth, he didn't have anyone on earth waiting for him. He was completely alone.
"John?" she said making him snap back to reality.
He quickly stood up and ran his fingers through his hair. "I've have to get going. Gotta get to sleep for tomorrow." He walked out without saying anything else.
John's feelings were starting to surface and he knew it which was why he headed strait for his quarters.
When he got inside his quarters, he felt like he was going to explode. Why is this happening to me? I already dealt with this when I got into the military.
Vicious thoughts ran through his head making him angrier and angrier by the minute until he finally hit his limit. "GOD DAMN IT!" He balled up both of his fists and slammed them into the nearest wall.
People walking by could hear the slams and crashes as John stove up just about everything in his room that didn't have any sentimental value. At one time, Teyla happened to be walking by on the way to her quarters when she heard the rackett.
"What do you think is going on?" One of the others near his door said.
Teyla stood there and thought for a second. "It may have been something I said to him earlier." She walked up to the door and stood there for a few seconds. The noise eventually stopped.
Teyla knocked a few times on his door. "John……..may I come in?" she said in a calm and comforting voice. There was no answer so she opened the door from the outside. When she walked in, she was horrified by what she saw. The bed was upside down, everything he owned was thrown everywhere, and there were some dents in the wall where it looked like he had been punching the wall. Then she saw John sitting on the floor against the wall in the corner.
"Teyla……get out. I want to be alone." John said. Teyla walked over to him and sat down on her knees facing him. "Teyla."
"John…..I am not leaving." She said. "You are not acting like yourself and I feel that this has happened because of what I said to you earlier." She looked down and say that both of his hands were bleeding. "What did you do?"
He hesitated for a minute but then told her what happened. "I punched the wall one too many times." He gave her a little smirk. "I guess I had it coming."
"John……please tell me what is wrong." She said.
"Its something that I have to deal with on my own." He said with a sad look on his face.
"Let me help." She said looking into his eyes. "John…….you don't have to be alone."
"Teyla……you don't understand." John said. He took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling.
"John….please tell me what is wrong." Teyla said. "I am offering my ear to you. Please." She looked so much like she was about to cry. She wanted to help him so much but he wouldn't let her and he wouldn't let anyone else help either.
"Teyla I……..I've been alone just about all of my life." He hesitated for a minute to collect himself. "I've never had anyone to talk to when I need it….." He stopped and shook his head some. "What am I talking about……everyone here probably feels that way."
"John…..I….I had no idea that you felt so alone all the time." Teyla said. "You can turn to me if you need to. I hope you know that." John started to get up when Teyla caught his arm.
"Please stay and talk to me." Teyla said with a sad look on her face.
John was about to sit back down when he stopped and squinted his eyes shut tight with pain. It was the same pain as before. Teyla watched in horror.
"John…..what is it?" She asked. He didn't respond. He grabbed his head and dropped to his knees. John groaned in pain and grabbed his head. Teyla touched her radio on her ear. "Dr. Beckett……Dr. Beckett, are you there?" There was no answer. "McKay?" She said. There was no answer there either. She turned to John. "I will be right back…..I need to go get Dr. Beckett." She started to get up.
"No." John said grabbing her arm. "Don't go." There was nothing she could really do for him but be there and that was exactly what she planned on doing. She sat back down. The pain had subsided temporarily. Teyla looked at him. Once again, he had a bloody nose. He reached up and wiped it away.
"John…..you should really go and see Dr. Beckett." She said. "There is something wrong and it seems to be getting worse every time it happens." She seemed concerned. John layed down on the floor and rested his head on her leg. He didn't look too good. He was pale like he was before and he was weak like he was before.
The next day, everything was normal as usual. Everyone woke up and did everything like they normally did. When John woke up, he saw a surprising site. It was Teyla. He thought he had been dreaming. She was sleeping when he sat up. He looked around and sighed. I did it again. I trashed my entire room and busted my hands all up for no reason. What exactly happened after that? I know someone turned on that friggan x-ray thing. The pain……couldn't forget that.
"Good morning John." Teyla said right after opening her eyes. "How are you feeling today?"
"Okay…..I guess." He said. He started to get up. His legs were weak so he put his hands on the wall to brace himself. He slowly stood up and leaned against the wall.
"Would you like me to get Dr. Beckett?" She asked with the same concerned look on her face as the night before.
After looking at the concerned look on her face, he figured that its about time he went to see the doctor. "I'll go see him." He said. He felt that he had enough strength to walk and he was right for once. Together, him and Teyla walked out of his room and to Dr. Becketts office.
Teyla was about to go in with him when he stopped her. "Go get something to eat…….I got it from here." She smiled and nodded and walked off. When he walked in, Dr. Beckett seemed a bit surprised.
"Colonel?" He said in disbelief. "What can I do for you today?" He motioned for John to sit down on one of the beds.
"Well…..ah…." he held his hands out. Beckett looked at his hands in horror.
"How did this happen?" Beckett asked in shock.
"I…..ah…lost my temper and punched a few walls." John said.
"You busted your knuckles open." Beckett said.
"Well….I hit them more then once." John said.
"That's not funny." Carson said.
"Lighten up Doc. My hands are the least of my worries." John said. "Its actually that thing that McKay has that's worrying me." John said. He had a concerned look on his face. Nobody knew what it was and there were few who even cared. "Whatever it is, its doing something to me."
Dr. Beckett had a confused look on his face. "How could the x-ray device do this stuff to you….I don't get it." Beckett said.
"Well…ancient technology, the ancient gene, who knows." John said. "Maybe the ancients were experimenting again…..they have done that before."
"Well that's true." Beckett said. "It could also be some type of side effect from the gene therapy that I did on McKay earlier." They both sat there for a second deep in thought trying to figure out what was wrong with him.
"Let me do some blood work and maybe I can figure something out." Beckett said. After that, John got his blood drawn and Beckett released him with a strong recommendation to come back if anything else bad happened to him.
Later on that day, Teyla was walking out of her quarters when she saw McKay standing there. "Do you need to see me for something?"
"Well kinda……I was just looking for Colonel Sheppard but I can't find him any where." McKay said. "I was wondering if maybe you might know where he is."
"No…..I haven's seen him since this morning." Teyla said with a regretful look on her face because she knew that the reason he wanted to find him was to apologize for what the x-ray device was doing for him and for turning it back on after being told to turn it off.
"Okay….well, if you see him, will you tell him I'm looking for him?" McKay asked. Teyla nodded and watched him walk away. She knew exactly where he was if he wasn't in his quarters. He was out on one of the balconies thinking again. She knew this was the best way to find him so she started walking. She walked until she found the balcony that he was on before and opened the door to go out.
Sure enough, when she walked out, John was standing at the end of the balcony looking out over the ocean. He didn't look very good. She slowly walked up and stood beside him.
"John…..you're outside alone again." She said while looking at him. He looked at her and heard a faint gasp out of Teyla's mouth. He had sweat running down his face and he was pale like he was the day before.
"Oh my god John…..are you okay?" She asked with a concerned look on her face. He didn't say anything but just looked at her. He looked like he was in a world of his own but he wasn't. Teyla knew that it was because he was sick. She reached up with a caring and gentle hand and felt his forehead. It was hot and he was trembling all over.
"John…..you are burning up." Teyla said putting her hands on both of his cheeks as he turned to face her.
"I feel worse now than I did earlier." He said. Teyla gave him a stern look.
"You told me that you would go and see Dr. Beckett." She said thinking it was because he didn't go to Dr. Beckett's office when he said he would.
"I did go to see Dr. Beckett." He said. He went to start walking away a little when he suddenly just fell to the floor.
"Oh my god." She said. She didn't have her radio and she could see that John didn't either. She knew that she had to get Dr. Beckett. She started to walk towards the door.
"Wait……don't go." John said in a faint voice.
"John……I need to go get Dr. Beckett." She said. The look on John's face as he sat himself up against the wall was a look of fear that she had never before seen. "Let me find someone to go and get him."
John nodded and watched her go out the door. There were a few people walk bye. She told them what was going on and that they needed to get Dr. Beckett. They agreed and went looking for Dr. Beckett.
When she got back outside, John was sitting up against the wall but he didn't look any better. She walked over and sat down beside him.
"You know……I've had the flu but nothing has knocked me down like this." He said in a soft voice.
"I do not know what you have but it is not good." Teyla said. She reached up and felt his forehead again. It still didn't feel any better. He was still trembling. They sat there for a few minutes in silence when the door opened.
"Alright……what's going on with him now?" Dr. Beckett asked as he walked over and walked around the other side of John and knelt down.
"Dr. Beckett…..he doesn't look too good. It is getting worse." Teyla said. Dr. Beckett reached up and felt John's forehead.
"We need to get him to the infirmary." Dr. Beckett said. He touched his com to call for a stretcher.
"Don't……..I can walk." John said as he tried to stand up. Teyla walked up and put her arm around him to help him stand. She knew that he was weak and that he needed help regardless of what he said. She knew he was tough but even tough people fall sometimes.
"Do you think you can walk?" Teyla asked with a concerned look on her face. She knew that weather he could or not, he would try his hardest.
"Yeah Teyla……I got it." John said as he got completely to his feet. She let go of him for just a second and he started to drop to the floor.
"John……you are not going to be able to walk all the way to the infirmary. You are too weak." She said as she put her arm back around him to help support his weight. They both began walking when John just fell to the ground. He was like dead weight and Teyla couldn't support him anymore. Beckett gave up and called for a stretcher. John was now out cold and they couldn't get him to wake back up.
To be continued…..