The Girl

Summary: Packed dialogue. The Hogwarts students discuss a girl. A close-to-plotless story with a bit of humour. Rated for language.

Author's Note:

Right. I asked my younger sister to read the first part (and to ignore all the bad words) because little kids tend to pick up imperfections in the characters easier. She said it was great, except that Ron didn't say 'bloody hell' enough. That's fair.

I don't think Ron's going to be in this chapter, but in the next one, he shall say 'bloody hell' a lot. Fair?

Disclaimer: It's not mine. Nuh-uh. Nope, nope, nope. But I own copies (very old, very used, and very patched copies, that is) of all the books. That's gotta be like buying shares, yeah?

Oh well. So the characters aren't mine, nor are the settings. However, I've found this wonderful thing called 'Fan Fiction', which lets me pretend that I do, if only for the time it takes me to write each chapter.

Bliss.

Early Morning – Griffindor Common Room

"G'morning, Hermione."

"Oh, hey, Harry. I didn't expect you to be up this early!"

"I'm not… am I?"

"…"

"Aw, shit, I thought I was dreaming."

"…"

"When did you get back from the Hospital Wing? I didn't see you come in last night."

"Eleven. Ron was still up, finishing his Defense homework."

"Defense homework?"

"…"

"Shit! That chapter on Kelpies!"

"…"

"…"

"Are you just going to stand there, or would you like to borrow my copy of Water Creatures and How They Can Kill You?"

"Err… I'll take the book."

"Boys…"

"Sorry? What was that?"

"Nothing."

Before First Period: Outside DADA Classroom

"Potter."

"Malfoy."

"Fuck you."

"What -? Fuck you!"

"Fuck you!"

"Fuck you!"

First Period: Defense Against the Dark Arts

"Hey, um, Hermione, can I go partners with you?"

"Of course you can, Neville. It's not like I'm going to go with Ron today."

"Why? What happened?"

"…"

"Oh, right, that thing in Transfiguration. I forgot."

"Yes. Bat-ears just aren't my thing, don't you agree?"

"…"

"Neville, can you please stop looking over my shoulder like that? It's a bit unnerving."

"Huh? Oh, sorry…"

"…"

"Do you know who she is?"

"Who?"

"That girl, sitting behind you."

"… Not personally, no."

"What do you know about her? She's beautiful, don't you think?"

"Erm… sure. She's Slytherin."

"What's her name? Do you know her name?"

"Lysin something. Ebstress, I think. Now are you going to help me label this Kelpie diagram, or am I going to have to do it by myself?"

"Lysin Ebstress… that's a beautiful name, don't you think…?"

"I'll do it by myself, then."

Lunch: Great Hall

"I still hate you, Seamus."

"Oh, don't worry, Dean. I hate me, too."

"Well, you can't hate you as much as I hate you."

"Watch me."

Fourth Period: Herbology

"Justin, your Squigmee Pod is about to –"

"OUCH!"

"Can't say I didn't warn you."

"But, Hannah, you didn't warn me."

"Well, I tried. I get credit for that, yes?"

"No."

"And why not?"

"Because I've still got Squigmee juice all down the front of my robes."

"Scourgify! – what Squigmee juice?"

"…"

"Oh, come now, there's no need to look at me like that!"

"…"

"So… have you seen that new Slytherin girl?"

"What? The one with the long hair?"

"Yes, the same."

"I don't think she's new. She's been here since first year."

"Are you sure? I don't remember seeing her…"

"Yes, I've heard that she got transferred from Beauxbatons Academy of Magic half way through first year, and Dumbledore gave her a private Sorting."

"Is that so?"

"Yes, Ernie told me all about it."

"Hmm… well I was told – by very reliable sources, mind – that she was home taught until just recently, when her parents died in a tragic accident, and so Dumbledore accepted her here."

"Is that so?"

"Indeed."

"Well, I've also heard – from my own reliable sources – that she –"

"Justin, why is Harry Potter staring at us?"

"I don't – watch where you're putting that Pod – OUCH!"

"Whoops, er… Scourgify!"

Midnight: Trophy Room

"Potter."

"Malfoy! What're you doing here?"

"I could ask the same of you."

"I know you could, but I asked first."

"I owe you no answer."

"…"

"Where's Weasley and the Mudblood?"

"Hospital Wing."

"Pardon? I didn't quite catch that."

"I said, 'They're in the Hospital Wing'. But I don't see why that matters to you, because –"

"Ah, I remember now. Fifth period, Transfiguration. The Weasel really isn't so handy with a wand, is he?"

"…"

"There's no point in denying it. I'm in your Transfiguration class; I saw what happened."

"Then why would you bring it up?"

"Entertainment, mostly."

"Just piss off, Malfoy."

"Ah, but I don't want to."

"And why not?"

"Because I'd much rather stay here and find out what you're doing, than go back down to the Slytherin common room and have Parkinson crawl all over me, begging for Merlin-knows-what."

"…"

"No need to pull that face at me, Potter, the whole school knows that Dumbledore's Golden Boy really isn't as 'golden' as he's made out to be."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Should I use smaller words, Potter? 'We all know you've been fucked.' How's that?"

"…"

"Fine, play stupid."

"…"

"Or is that your normal face?"

"What're you doing here, Malfoy? You couldn't have known where I was, so you're not only here to bother me."

"Surely I can't be that much of a hindrance to the great Boy Who Lived. You just keep doing whatever it is you're doing, until I figure out what it is."

"No."

"I'll just have to find out the hard way, then."

"Yeah, you will."

"…"

"…"

"Ah, what's this you were standing so conveniently in front of?"

"Give it back, Malfoy."

"Hmm… it's pretty old…"

"Give it back."

"From what I can tell, it's a log book, recording every student to ever attend Hogwarts, is that right, Potter?"

"Maybe. Now hand it over."

"No. I want to know what you're looking for."

"It's none of your business."

"Oh, I know it's none of my business. That little factor makes it all the more interesting, don't you think?"

"…"

"Hmm… let's see… this record is organized first by year of entry to the school, and then by House. You were looking at 1997 – that's the year that we came – and… Slytherin."

"…"

"Why, Potter, were you looking at Slytherin?"

"No reason."

"Bullshit. How can you possibly expect me to believe that?"

"I don't. I just want the book back."

"Ah, I think you're going to have to be a bit more persuasive than that, Potter."

"…"

"Hmm… there's a newer entry here. Down at the bottom. 'Lysin Ebstress'. Is that what you were looking for, Potter? Is that it?"

"Err… maybe? Just give me the book."

"No. There's a note here, beside her name. Is that what you were looking for?"

"…"

"No need to glare at me like that, Potter. I'm here for answers, too. It's only fair that we both get what he want."

"…"

"'Applied 2000', it says."

"Give it back."

"Make me."

"Don't think I wont hex you, because I will."

"Hah, you wish you would, Potter. But you don't have the guts. Not nearly."

"Expleli- FUCK!"

"So maybe you do have the guts."

"You punched me."

"Do you do that all the time? State the obvious, I mean."

"…"

"Oh, come on, it's not even bleeding."

"You will be, in a second."

"Is that a threat, Potter?"

"Yeah, it is."

"Feisty."

"I've heard you like them that way."

"And what is that supposed to mean, Potter?"

"Let's just say that the whole school knows Syltherin's 'Prince' isn't as… clean as he's supposed to be."

"You'll pay for that."

"After you've given me back the book, perhaps."

"Why do you want it so much? What's in it?"

"You know what? Forget it. I'm going to bed."

"I will find out, Potter."

:

Woo! Lots of Malfoy and absolutely no Ron. Hmm…

And you've probably noticed that Hermione has a lot of '…'s. That's because she tends to give the Look a lot. It's a girl thing. But I'm sure you've already picked that up.

What I'm most interested to hear is what you think of Malfoy. Tell me?

Stephanie R.