Part 12

Thirty. His phone rang. Thirty. Dean reached over and picked up his stupid pink phone with stupid little kittens on it. "Hello?"

"Hey man."

"Sam?" Dean sat up and propped himself up against the headboard.

"You doing okay?"

"Yeah. Getting my three squares in. Staying healthy and all."

"You have…" Sam's voice broke.

"I know."

"Dean… I'm trying but we're not finding anything worth trying."

"I know, Sam. Don't beat yourself up."

"It's not enough time. Come out with me."

"I can't." Dean swallowed the lump in his throat. "I'm not punching my ticket a moment before it's due."

"Okay." Sam took a deep breath. "So… how's the car?"

"Wish I could drive her."

"You're not holed up in that apartment, are you?"

"Nah." Dean relaxed a little. "Went to the museum. Some traveling exhibit."

"Really, you?"

"Never been to one… wanted to see what all the fuss was about." He breathed out. "I kind of lucked out. You remember George Darrow?"

"The artist guy who sold his soul?"

"Yeah, his stuff was traveling around. They were making this huge fuss and they were talking about his work as if they knew him and knew what his life was like and… I was walking around in this room with all those paintings we'd seen at his place. The context was all wrong. I wanted to take them all down and hang them up the right way. I felt like I was the only person who knew how to look at them…"

"You probably are, Dean."

"I went back and spent a whole day in that room with him… seriously. It was like he was in the room… There was this exhibit on Asian art and, dude… I could see the influences. Rakshasa… and tulpas… They were all there. These really ancient works and I just thought… 'God, how long has man been fighting this war?' and I nearly passed out. I didn't… real glad I didn't because the next exhibit was this… memoriam to heroes."

"You enjoyed the museum?"

"Shut up."

"Okay… so what about this memoriam?"

"There were some 9/11 displays. Desert Storm and Vietnam, you know. If you squinted, you could see Dad in them… just… cause… Anyway… there were replicas of like ancient battles. There's this one with some saint and a dragon…"

"St. George and the Dragon."

"Yeah and I was like… I could have run that thing over in the car. It wasn't even near approaching big."

"It's a metaphor."

"But what if it wasn't. What if St. George and the rest of the 14 helpers really did do battle with devils and demons and dragons… We're walking in the footsteps of saints, Sam… and I threw away my chance to walk through the pearly gates. I don't regret what I did… but… in 30 days… I make the trip the other way and I've gotten a taste of what that feels like." Dean sniffed suddenly, feeling cold. He pulled the sheets up his chest to ward off the sudden chill. "I spent two days in the museum and it wasn't enough. The old me would have never gone in… but the me I am now… went back alone to take my time… To take it all in."

"Who did you go with before?" Sam listened to the silence and smiled. "It was a girl, wasn't it?"

"What if it was?"

"Some nurse, then?"

"Maybe."

"Some really hot nurse?"

"Fine. It was Carmen. Are you happy?" Dean bit out and lowered his voice when he heard her moving around in the bathroom.

"Dude… I don't care as long as you're some measure of happy because… I can't remember the last time when you were."

"Oh God… have you any idea how much we sound like a couple of girls?"

Sam laughed at that. He was wondering when Dean would notice that. Carmen walked in pulling her top over her head. "Dean, did I wake you?"

"Nah, phone rang." He waved it at her.

"Okay. Get some sleep. I'll be back before you wake up. Feel free to eat my food or… fix my leaky sink or anything you want." She dropped a kiss on his lips. "But sleep?"

"Yeah. It's Sam." He gestured with the phone again.

"Tell him I said 'hi'. I gotta go."

Dean waited a beat after Carmen left the room. "Shut up."

"You're sleeping over at her place now?"

"I said shut up."

"When did that even happen? Last time I was there, you needed Ellen shoving you in the back to even kiss her."

"That was twenty days ago, Sam. A lot can change in twenty days."

"Apparently."

"I'm having normal conversations, Sam. I'm not even lying that much. Do you know what we did Friday night?"

"What?"

"We went bowling with Jenny and her kids." Dean laughed to himself. "Bowling. I had fun even though I completely sucked at it. Tonight, I had dinner with her family. Her mom loves me… it's kind of freaking me out."

"What's next? A picnic and a drive in the Impala with the windows down?"

"Um…" he had to clear his throat. "We did that yesterday."

Sam laughed long and hard at that. It felt good. "Whose idea was that?"

"Hers… but I dragged her to Jenny's… and I got her caught up in a bar fight about a week ago… so… I owed her."

"Wait… I thought you couldn't see to drive…"

"I let her drive."

"Dude."

"Then she took me to a lot and let me try it without killing anyone. I'm still not ready to get behind the wheel."

"It's been an exciting twenty days, then."

"Yeah…" He swallowed down a lump. "I started having the dreams, Sam… seeing Hellhounds in the corner of my eyes."

"You want me to come?"

"No… Just… promise that you'll wait a day."

"I said I would."

"I know that if you come now, you won't leave… and I can't whore myself for enough food to feed us both."

"You mooching off your new girlfriend? Not cool."

"She offers and I'm handy."

"You're a ho."

"Shut up." Dean scoffed and sank into the bed.

"You're a kept man, Dean Winchester." Sam sobered. "Have you told her?"

"No… I can't.""Tell her something… don't let her be the one to find your body… I'm still working on it but… do her that favor."

TBC