Author's notes: Ah! Finally finished Ultima 5: Lazarus, and now this third and fore last part of the Xander in Nerima section of this season. I hope you guys like it. Someone asked for a time frame; well seeing as Xander is getting taught the Hiryu Shoten Ha, it can only be early in the fourth season of Ranma ½. Basically, I'm going that some 3 seasons, equals a single year, seeing as there's not much real time passage in the show - it's pure humor after all.
Okay, then, on with the story. Have fun, and give me feedback as usual!
----Part 3: The Economic American----
Xander had finished his cold shower, and turned it too hot, thus returning to his true self. He let his hands move over his body, the warm water and shampoo caressing him. It was a good shower.
"Well, hello big boy."
"YAAAH!" Xander exclaimed in surprise, turning instantly to his right, where the voice was coming from. Outside of the cubicle was Nabiki, leaning casually against the sink, and had a very predatory smirk on her face; her eyes casually going down without a moment of shame.
"Very big boy," Nabiki said approvingly, all but purring. She herself was in a tight pair of jeans hot pants, and a top that left her belly button visible.
"Have you no shame?" Xander exclaimed, and quickly put his hands in front of 'himself'.
"What for? Only gets in the way of making money and ogling hot guys," Nabiki said, her smirk not once wavering.
"I should try this on you or your sisters! I'd be chased down the street being called a pervert," Xander said angrily, turning around to turn off the shower.
"Not by me you wouldn't, I'd just pull you in and ravish you," Nabiki said, licking her lips while checking out Xander's naked behind, and what a behind.
Xander's eyes widened and then growled. He turned back around and stepped out of the cubicle, his shower cut short. As he took the first step out, he looked at Nabiki just standing there ogling him. "Get me the -damn- towel!" Xander told Nabiki.
Nabiki sighed deeply, theatrically, sadly, and handed Xander his towel. Xander rapidly tied it around his waist, which meant Nabiki's eyes had risen to his muscular chest. "Hmm," she purred.
Xander grumbled, grabbed a second towel, and then told her, "I should make naked pictures of you and hang them in my room."
As Xander started toweling off with the second towel, Nabiki grinned, gave a shrug, and told him, "Perhaps you should. And I really should get a batch of naked pictures of you and hang them in my room."
"All right, off with the clothes," Xander said, fed up.
"What?" Nabiki exclaimed surprised.
"Off with the clothes. You've seen me naked as a boy and a girl, you spy on me, tried to sell my naked pictures, and are shamelessly ogling me here, as if I'm one of the Chippendales. That entitles me to some return viewing. Off," Xander said somewhat angrily.
"I'm not-" Nabiki started, and Xander stepped forward, dropped the second towel, grabbed the buttons of her pants, and started undoing them. "HEY!" she exclaimed in surprise. The hot pants were shoved down to her knees a moment later, revealing a red, silky g-string. Shocked, Nabiki moved her hands down to stop Xander but he was far too strong as they reached up to her top. "Stop it!" Nabiki protested, but Xander continued. "All right, all right, I'll quit the ogling and the stupid innuendo!"
Xander pulled his hands back, "Oh, now you've got modesty, huh?" He reached down for the second towel.
Nabiki looked at Xander, seeing his fists in his sides, and with his muscular physique he looked like a god. The left side of her mouth quirked up, and she moved her hands up her torso. It reached her top, and pressing a little harder it moved up with her hands. Xander looked surprised as Nabiki sensually pulled her top over her breasts, exposing them. They looked good, c-cup, apple-shaped with slightly pointy nipples. "Like what you see?" Nabiki asked huskily.
Xander tore his surprised eyes from Nabiki's exposed chest, and looked into her eyes. "What is it you want, Nabiki?" Xander asked her directly, fed up with the games.
Nabiki smiled, and gently lowered her top again, answering, "You."
"What?" Xander asked confused.
Nabiki smiled brighter, baring her separated teeth, and said, "More precisely, I want you to take my virginity."
Xander's eyes all but popped out. He stared at her for a moment, the second towel dropping back to the floor. He shook his head, and with a raised right index finger, he said, "Uh, excuse me, but I thought I just heard you say that you wanted me to . . . uhm . . ."
"Take my virginity," Nabiki finished for him. "That is indeed what I said."
"Oh," Xander said, and got a grip on his mind. How to handle this? "Well, you see, Nabiki, it's like this. I'm going back to the US in a few weeks, and I've got somewhat girlfriends there, including Lotion, and-"
Nabiki interrupted him with a smile, leaning back again, the sink in her lower back, "I didn't ask for a relationship, Xander Harris. I want you to take my virginity."
Xander's eyes widened again. He asked, "You don't want?"
"Oh, no, the men I date, am with, marry one day are suckers, losers who will pay my bills. You though, you outwitted me. I want a man that I can respect to take my virginity," Nabiki told him frankly. Xander's eyes widened a bit more, frozen, trying to wrap his mind around that. "It's called a one-night-stand," Nabiki clarified.
"I know," Xander said, and straightened up. He couldn't do that. He had girlfriends. They're not girlfriends! Not yet! Another part of his mind disagreed. But . . . No buts! You have an arrangement. It's all very clear that you are not with any of them until you make a decision. You are free.
Part of him wanted to point out one-night-stands were wrong. -Oh, fuck it!- he told himself though. She wanted it, he wanted it . . . now, he wasn't misleading her, hell he wasn't even the one doing the seducing. There was just no way he could pass up this opportunity, he indeed wasn't with anyone until he made a clear decision. "I take it you have given this more thought?" Xander asked with smirk.
Nabiki smiled back, feeling her heart beating in her chest. It was really going to happen, her eyes returned to his body, flashes of what it might be like shooting through her. "Nine o'clock, tonight, meet me outside at the gate, I know a comfortable motel," Nabiki said softly, now suddenly nervous, not understanding why.
"Condoms? You got some, or do I go get them," Xander asked swiftly and softly as well, not really wanting anyone to overhear.
"You get them," Nabiki answered, then hesitated as she wanted to go. "Have you ever . . .?" she asked swiftly, then trailing off, feeling herself flush.
"As a guy, yes," Xander said, smiling just a little.
Nabiki swallowed the saliva that had formed in her mouth, and then asked, "Was it good?"
"Very," Xander said, flashing back to Buffy, remembering how totally the two of them had felt and moved seemingly as one, how their pleasure had exploded through them.
"For her too," she asked even more softly.
"Definitely," he answered, and Nabiki looked up. "Trust me, she was as blown away as I was," Xander asked, smirking now, feeling how the situation was now in his hands. Nabiki shivered, and prepared to leave. "Was over too quickly though," Xander stopped her, remembering the aftermath. "Be very certain you want this, and we'll just have to do it more often if we don't want the same sensation." Nabiki looked back at him for a moment, and then realized what he meant: he wasn't going to quit after one time. She licked her lips, gave Xander a last look, and then hurried out. "I can't believe this is happening," Xander muttered, looking down at himself, then smiled broadly.
-----
The breakfast table was tense - very tense. They were all present, including Happosai, in fact he was sitting across from Xander, apparently to keep an eye on him. Xander returned the favor, eating silently while keeping his eyes trained on Happosai as much as possible. The two of them glared at each other, attempting to force the other into submission by eyes alone, and neither were having any luck. Nabiki gently looked from one to the other, and then swallowed, even though she didn't have anything in her mouth except saliva. Soun and Genma looked on, and with them the terror was easily readable off of their faces. They were hoping desperately the two weren't going to throw more bombs around. Akane was eating, and stole nervous glances at the two, ready to bolt if either pulled bombs out. Ranma never showed fear, but he too peered from Xander to Happosai and back a little nervous. He may be the greatest martial artist in Japan, if not the world, but not even he was stupid enough to stand in the way of a bomb.
Thus, breakfast was silent . . . well, almost. Kasumi did seem to notice the tension at all, and happily hummed along while she ate. While she did so, glances kept being thrown at Xander at Happosai, who did not take their eyes off from each other.
Finally it was Happosai that broke the silence, "What are you looking at, girly boy?"
"At a disgusting, perverted, old geezer," Xander answered with a growl, completely oblivious to everyone but Kasumi looking alarmed at the two.
"You take that back, kiddy," Happosai retorted, not caring as two males made desperate, terrified signals for him and Xander to stop.
"The hell I will, grandpa!" Xander hissed back, completely unnoticing the signals.
Happosai stood up, slamming his hands on the table, and said, "That does it."
"What are you gonna do? Toss more bombs? I'll toss them right back, and this time I'm going to make sure I take you out, even if I have to lay waste to the entire greater Tokyo area!" Xander exclaimed, looking at Happosai with blazing eyes, who returned it.
"Please don't!" Genma whimpered, bowing down in front Xander, hands pressed together above his head. "Surrogate son great warrior and chemist, we know, no more destruction please!"
Across from Xander Soun was bowing down to Happosai in the same way, begging and whimpering, making Ranma roll his eyes. Happosai turned back from Soun to Xander, and said, "You're in luck, upstart, if my pupil was not begging my restraint . . ."
"Same goes for you, old man, if my surrogate father wasn't asking me . . ." Xander said, glaring back to Happosai just as hard as Happosai was glaring at him.
"Oh, thank the gods," Soun and Genma said, looking up at the skies in gratitude.
And so the Tendo extended family ate breakfast in peace that morning . . . for all of two minutes. "Nihau!" was yelled as the doors were pulled open, revealing Shampoo. "Come for training!"
She grabbed Ranma at the back, and pulled him along. "Glo! Mmmh! Mmh!" Ranma gargled, as the bread he was just eating shot into the wrong hole still unchewed, making him gag and cough. He was lifted up in the air over the table, while choking on the food, spraying some of it over the table. "MMMH!" Ranma exclaimed further, turning red, coughing for air. Finally he managed to get it out of the wrong hole and down the right one, and before he disappeared from sight, he said, "Shampoo! Damn you! Come on, Xander!"
Xander shrugged and followed the couple while Akane looked steamed. The rest shrugged and continued eating breakfast, except Kasumi who said, "Oh, my."
-----
Ranma smoothly ducked beneath Shampoo's punch, and smashed both his hands into her stomach. The Amazon was launched off of her feet, and smacked on the wooden floor ass first. "Ouch," Shampoo exclaimed, and quickly got up, looking determined. She advanced on Ranma who waited patiently for her with a smile on his face. "Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire!" Shampoo exclaimed in Chinese . . . and threw several barely faster punches as normal, which Ranma easily avoided, and brought the Amazon down with a leg swipe.
"Oof!" Shampoo exclaimed as she landed on her back.
"You should have been able to see that coming," Ranma said with disapproval at the Amazon. This was dang odd; he was teaching students, and one of them a girl. Of course, if he truly was to inherit the Tendo Dojo he would have to start sooner or later.
"Why not work! Work for Lotion! Why me not?" Shampoo exclaimed frustrated, and then sat up.
Xander was slowly working on his circles, totally calm. "Took Buffy and Lotion more than three months to learn," Xander told her, "you can probably expect it to take that long with you."
"What Xander said," Ranma said, enjoying the work out. Usually he was alone, only occasionally sparring with Akane; but she was nowhere near Shampoo's level. If Xander trained regularly with girls of Shampoo's and Lotion's caliber, and training with Ryoga, and training with magic practitioners, it was no wonder his friend had improved so much. He was almost as good as himself - it was time Shampoo, Akane and the like were going to train with him, and he teach and train them, that way they'd get better and he'd have better training partners, so he could stay ahead of Xander.
"But you and Xander do in days!" Shampoo exclaimed frustrated.
"Yeah, well, we're men," Ranma said, and shrugged. Shampoo looked at him with a dreamy look, which he completely missed. Behind them though, Akane had arrived into the dojo a little earlier. At first she had taken in the sweaty boys, enjoyed the look, but then realized that Shampoo must enjoy the look as well, and they probably enjoyed Shampoo's sweaty vision vice versa. It had made her pissed; which made her increase the stack of planks to slam her hand through by nearly half, and succeeded destroying them with ease. She now noticed Shampoo's dreamily look, and glared at the Amazon balefully.
Shampoo shook her head though, and got up. "We continue!" she exclaimed, breathing a little heavily.
"Ranma, I wanna try this out again, I think I got it now," Xander said, and went into a stance.
Ranma smiled, and told Shampoo, "Right after Xander's tryout." The Amazon grumbled but acquiesced. To Xander Ranma said as he walked to the exit, "Let's do it outside, huh. You have mastered it, we're not going to destroy the building."
Xander nodded, and they went outside. Xander calmed himself several meters away from the building, while Ranma increased his chi and heat. "Ready?" Ranma asked, slightly nervous; if Xander indeed had succeeded he was going to be tossed around by the whirlwind just like it had Xander earlier.
"Ready," Xander answered with a slight smile. Leave it to Xander to realize it too, Ranma reflected before charging. Ranma made his chi burn bright, and allowed himself to follow the spiral Xander was making backwards. They reached the middle, and Xander made the uppercut, grasping the chi around him with his own, yelling, "Hiryu Shoten Ha!"
Wind picked up . . . just a little, and Ranma's fist connect with Xander's right cheek, sending him flying backward and landing painfully on his ass. "Ow," he said, sitting back up. "Was that necessary?"
"It'll be incentive for you to master the art quicker," Ranma said with a grin. "AAH!" he exclaimed a moment later, as Shampoo dragged him back into the dojo.
"Future Husband hurry training, must beat upstart!" Shampoo exclaimed, while dragging Ranma back inside. The boy was mumbling several expletives, while Xander watched astounded. Then he started training again.
-----
Sunnydale
The beautiful ass was wrapped in leather, and gyrating seductively in front of Buffy. The band playing in the bronze was swinging the place up, lights flashing around. Buffy pressed herself against the beautiful girl, looking around slyly. The place was packed, and lots of boys and men, a few with girls were dancing around them. Her hands circled Willow's waist and rubbed across the redhead's bare stomach, feeling the soft warm skin. Buffy moaned slightly as she pressed herself even closer to Willow's backside, whispering in Willow's ear, "I had no idea a girl's ass could look so good." Willow smirked as Buffy's lips touched her skin just below her ear. Buffy then added, "You look so damn hot in leather."
With the boys around them looking both wide-eyed and disappointed, Willow turned her head back slightly and returned the compliment, "You look pretty damn good in a skirt yourself, Buffy." Their lips touched, they still moved to the music, then their tongues massaged each other, making Willow shiver, and Buffy marvel at her best friend's lips.
Off to the side, Oz and Cordelia sat at a table, on a couch. Cordelia's eyes were wide and watched the couple kiss, and heat the place up with their sexy dance. "Pinch me," Cordelia muttered. Oz silently moved his hand over, and pinched her knee. "Ouch," Cordelia said, and rubbed her knee, before turning back to watch the lewd scene. "I must be hallucinating. Oz, am I hallucinating?"
"I would have to know what you're seeing to make that assessment," the guitar player answered smoothly.
"Buffy and Willow are kissing - each other - with tongue!" Cordelia said in disbelief, gesturing impotently at the scene, as quite a few guys decided however hot the sight, it was best spending time on girls they actually had a chance with. The remaining quarter of the male Bronze patronage, disagreed.
"The persons having the same hallucinations is basically impossible, so I can safely say, you're not hallucinating," Oz answered, his own eyes taking in the sight, and not completely unaffecting by it, which made him frown just a tiny bit as he thought about it. Willow had turned around, and her hands were on Buffy's ass, tightening the fabric of the short skit around the roundness. They seemed oblivious to their audience, as Buffy moved her hands higher, along Willow's top, and then cupping the redhead's breasts gently.
"No way! Just no way! Has everyone gone insane in this place?" Cordelia all but shrieked in shock.
"Hellmouth, so possible," Oz said, liking the scene in front of him a lot.
Cordelia turned her head to Oz briefly, and then as the band finished the song, she said, "Buffy was straight, right? I wasn't imagining her having the hots for two males, one a corpse, last year, was I?"
"No, you didn't. It seems Buffy found another aspect of her sexuality. Shouldn't we applaud that?" Oz stated, and looked at Cordelia who pondered the question for a few moments as the band announced they were taking a few minutes break to lubricate their throats.
Willow and Buffy came over, holding hands and smiling brightly, which made Cordelia get into a foul mood. "And wasn't Willow obsessed with a certain loser we both know?" Cordelia grumbled, folding her arms across her chest. Oz nodded. The new couple reached them and sat down opposite the older one, and smiled at each other. "You two have something to tell us?" Cordelia all but growled.
Willow and Buffy looked over, confused. "Oh!" Willow suddenly realized. "We're a couple, Buffy found out she likes girls too, and I've been noticing her since Xander isn't here to distract me."
"Hey!" Buffy whined cutely, which pulled Cordelia's foul mood down even more.
"Oh, sorry, you're not second to anyone, Buffy," Willow said, and she kiss Buffy full on the mouth to reassure her.
Cordelia was about to grumble and complain to Oz, and noticed him looking with a light smile to the other couple. Cordelia sighed, rolled her eyes, and announced, "Your reason for applauding them, Oz, is you get off on it!"
Oz turned his head and regarded his steamed girlfriend. He shrugged lightly, and said, "I'm a heterosexual male." Cordelia was about to launch into a tirade, but Oz leaned over, and kissed her passionately in her neck, then lower on her collar bone. With Buffy and Willow watching a little perplexed at the uncharacteristic show of affection, Oz whispered, "It gets me hot. Let's find someplace more private."
Cordelia first shivered at the kisses, then perked up at the words. While getting up and pulling Oz along, she said with a big grin and in good spirits, "Buffy, Willow, I applaud you two. Go for it, often, in public. Excuse us." Then the cheerleader and the guitar player scrambled off through the crowd, followed by Buffy's and Willow's astonished gazes.
Willow then turned her head back to Buffy who was looking in the right direction already. Willow looked perturbed at her girlfriend, and said, "Was it something I said?"
-----
Nerima
Breathing heavily, the three trainees, Xander, Ranma and Shampoo, came back into the residential section of the Tendo home; more specifically, the kitchen. They were smudged, bruised, sweaty and scratched, but very fulfilled. They were smiling.
"Did you have fun?" Kasumi asked politely from where she was vacuuming the floor.
"Yep," Xander said with a grin, and Ranma nodded.
"Fun?" Shampoo asked incredulously, "This no fun! This serious! Beat Lotion! Lotion pay!"
"Oh, well, you should all get a shower, separately of course," the oldest Tendo daughter offered politely.
Shampoo looked with large eyes at the woman, while Xander killing sniffed his shoulders. "Oh, yeah," he agreed with a face, "working out definitely makes the sweat glands work."
He immediately started toward the bathroom. At that moment Akane walked in, holding a cute pig to her chest. "Look, P-chan is back!" Akane exclaimed happily. "Isn't he cute? I wish I knew where you manage to get off to all the time." The girl then hugged the pig even closer.
As Ranma and Shampoo rolled their eyes, Xander did a double take. He looked closer, and noticed the pig suddenly glaring angrily at him. "Hey, wait a minute!" Xander exclaimed, pointing at the pig, and how he was pushed close to Akane's breasts. "You-"
"Must get a shower!" Ranma quickly interrupted, and yanked Xander along to the bathroom before he could betray Ryoga's secret, clamping his hand over Xander's mouth.
Akane followed the two with confused eyes. "What's with them?" she asked in wonder.
"They worked out a lot, they're very dirty," Kasumi answered smoothly, apparently oblivious to what was going on. Akane blinked and turned her head to regard her older sister.
"I go home, bath there!" Shampoo announced, giving her rival a glare and then jumped out an open window.
Ranma pulled Xander into the bathroom, hand still covering his mouth. Then he let the annoyed mumbling Xander go, and slammed the door shut. "What the hell was that for?" Xander asked confused.
"Akane doesn't know P-chan is Ryoga," Ranma explained quickly, looking around a little guilty.
Xander stared at Ranma for several moments confused, and then said, "All the more reason to tell her, she's holding a guy to her breasts!"
"Ack. Man, that's not it. Ryoga hates it. He doesn't want Akane to know, because he can't bare the shame if he knew he was a pig half the time," Ranma said defeated, "Plus I kinda am at fault for putting him in that position."
Xander once more stared at Ranma mauling things over, and then asked, frowning in confusion and disbelief, "So you let him grope your fiancee's breasts as some sick form of compensation?"
"No! Dammit, Xander. This is honor here, so she doesn't know Ryoga's has as shameful a curse as I have!" Ranma said in annoyance. "And don't call the uncute tomboy my fiancee even if technically she is!"
"Ranma, the little bastard may once not have wanted Akane to know because of the great shame and just gotten picked up accidentally, but that's gone, he's just milking it for what it's worth. 'P-chan' equals groping breasts!" Xander frowned, went over what he said, and then considered, "Which is brilliant in an I-just-want-to-grope-breasts or I-base-my-relationship-on-a-lie-after-removing-the-curse-and-killing-everyone-who-knows-the-truth sort of evil way, but still! He's a guy that's groping a girl you know's breasts, by using duplicity!"
Ranma thought it over for a few moments, frowned, and said, "You're right, gods be damned, you're right!" Ranma was grimacing evilly now, and heading for the door.
"Let's get a shower first, you don't want Akane running away with P-chan because she wants to keep her sense of smell intact," Xander said annoyed, pulling his friend toward the bath.
-----
Xander was the one knock decisively on Akane's door. Ranma stood nervously next to him. "She's gonna kill us, before we can tell her," he whispered.
"Come in!" sounded friendly from inside the Tendo girl's room.
"At most she'll uppercut us through the roof, and we survived that," Xander said and opened the door. Dragging the reluctant Ranma after him.
When Akane, sitting at her desk, saw the two walking into her room, her good mood instantly evaporated. Holding P-chan to her breast, and narrowing her eyes dangerously at the pair, she growled, "What are /you/ two doing here?"
Silence. Xander turned his head to Ranma, who shrugged. Xander sighed and turned back to Akane, and raised his right finger. "/That/ is Ryoga," Xander stated. Immediately, P-chan squinted his eyes angrily, and squeaked, struggling to get to the bastard, but Akane held him tightly.
"Huh? What are you talking about?" Akane asked confused.
"We fell into the Pond of the Drowned Girl, he fell into the Pond of the Drowned Piglet," Xander explained, as the piglet continued his struggling.
"Don't be stupid," Akane told Xander angrily, while Ranma prepared himself to run in case Akane grabbed for a weapon. "You're just trying-" Xander reached from behind him, produced a plant spray can with warm water, and sprayed. "You ba-!" Akane started to scream in anger, but was interrupted as her balance was suddenly completely off, as well that her arms were suddenly holding /far/ more weight. Where P-chan had just been, there was now a naked Ryoga, barring his bandana still wrapped around his neck. Akane look shocked at the naked boy, and Ryoga at her. Then the chair keeled over and the two crashed to the floor. They lay there silent, staring in each other's eyes for a moment, thinking.
"YOU BASTARDS!" Ryoga then exclaimed and started to scramble to his feet to beat up Xander and Ranma.
Akane was getting up to, but for a different reason - well, a different person. A low growl, somewhat of a combination between a hack and a hiss; souding like something really nasty and dangerously came from her throat as she rose, slowing Ryoga down. Akane's face was twisted in a fury and rage like Ranma had never seen. He was about to run, when he heard her growl deeply,"-Ryoga!-"
Ryoga stopped in his tracks. He was twisted around, and an uppercut later, he was sent flying out the roof. "RAAAAAHHH!" Akane screamed and then bounded toward Ranma and a still spray-holding Xander. Ranma was about to run, when Akane hissed, "Out of the way!" She barreled passed the two, adding, "I'm not finished with that pervert yet!"
"I almost feel bad for him," Ranma said, looking as the furious Akane stormed out the room, while outside with a yell, Ryoga came back down to Earth with a smack. "Almost. I gotta see this, finally she's not blaming me!" Ranma said and charged gleefully after Akane, closely followed by a smiling.
Soon after the two friends were in the garden, watching as Akane advanced on the still dazed Ryoga, lying smack on the ground. "Ryoga!" Akane growled, and swung a mighty right, sending the boy, groaning in pain, backward, smashing against the surrounding wall.
"Aah!"
"I thought you were better!" Akane raged, getting close to him again, and started raining raining blows on the boy's face, who could only stay put and take the punishment - after all, he kinda deserved, he didn't fight girls, and he certainly not his beloved akane. "Pervert! Groper! Bastard! Molester!"
"Ouch, ooh," Ranma said with a grin a few meters off. He turned to Xander and said, "Finally he gets his." Xander nodded with a slight smirk.
After half a minute of beating Ryoga to a pulp, Akane stopped her abuse, and slowly turning around, she said dangerously, "Ranma."
Ranma smiled, wondering what Akane wanted. Xander frowned, and suddenly realized something. He quickly clasped Ranma's shoulder, saying, "Friend." That drew Ranma's attention and Xander told him, "I've detected a kink in the plan."
"Huh?"
Akane turned fully around, and shouted, "Ranma-baka! How long have you known P-chan was Ryoga and let him molest me?"
Ranma went rigid. "That kink. Run," Xander said.
Ranma's face changed to surprise as Akane started her charge. "Aah!" he exclaimed and indeed ran the other way.
"Ranma-baka! Get back here!" Akane screamed, running after the fleeing boy. "Idiot! Bastard! RANMAAAA!"
-----
Akane got back to her room, grumbling expletives about boys, perverts, and Ranma in particular. She planted herself down in her chair, depressed. Then she noticed a folded piece of paper with her name on it. She opened it, and found a letter, which she then started reading.
--O--
Akane,
I apologize deeply for my actions. I was wrong, I was disgusting. It started all innocently enough. I was a piglet, Ranma was after me, you picked me up and shielded me from him. When you held me I could see how much Ranma hated it, and so I didn't stop it. I searched it out to torment him. I found I liked you and I used Ranma as an excuse.
It was wrong; and what I did was unforgivable , therefor I will go, and I shall never return.
Goodbye, beautiful Akane,
Ryoga
--O--
Akane read over the letter again, and a third time. Then she crumbled it up, and tossed it in the trash, "Stupid Ryoga! Stupid Ranma! Boys! Baka!"
-----
2 hours later
Heavily breathing, and heavily bruised Ryoga came to stand still. He got lost pretty easily, now he had purposefully gone to get himself lost. "I wonder where I am," he muttered.
"Nihau, Ryoga," a beautiful brunette said as she passed him by happily. Ryoga's eyes widened in shock. She turned right to the entrance of a wall-surrounded home. The tight-fitting dress had a style that seemed familiar to him. "Xander, nihau!" the girl yelled.
-Ryoga? Xander?- Ryoga thought eyes still big as saucers. He turned right, up to the sign above the gate, and read, 'Tendo Dojo.' "AAAH!" he screamed, and ran off rapidly. He slowed to stop a minute later, breathing even more heavily due to his sprint. There, now he was far enough away none from the Tendo home would see him. He could rest a bit, and then renew his attempts to get lost.
"Shampoo! Are you here my darling?"
Ryoga's eyes widened and turned around. He knew that bastard; the guy who turned into a goose. He blinked as the guy came closer. It didn't really matter, except that he vaguely recognized the wall to the left of him. There was a gate. He looked up, and read, 'Tendo Dojo.' "AAARGH!" he screamed again, and bolted once more, running onward, much onward.
Mousse stepped passed the gate, paying the screaming and running boy no heed. He looked around the Tendo place, and soon recognized the brunette standing just a bit off, happily looking onward, smiling dreamily. He checked for a moment, and found she was looking at Xander who was sitting on a rock near the pond, steadily bandaging Ranma's new injuries.
"YOU!" Mousse then exclaimed focusing on Lotion. As one the three occupants of the garden turned around and looked at the white-robed, glasses-wearing Chinese boy. His long hair hung slickly, passed his shoulders. "You hurt my Shampoo, Lotion! For that you will pay. Take this!" Mousse shot his arms forward, and a rain of sharp weapons, blunt weapons and chained weapons burst forward at the brunette Amazon.
"Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire!" Lotion exclaimed, and to Mousse's shock, the brunette's hands turned to a blur, and simply caught all his weapons. "Take own medicine, annoying loser!" Lotion told him, her Japanese as broken as her English was when she first arrived in Sunnydale, and simply tossed all the weapons back at Mousse. His eyes widened and he tried to run, but came to the shocking realization that his chained weapons Lotion hadn't tossed back.
"AAAAH!" Mousse screamed; trapped by his own chains, he could only take the onslaught of sharp weapons head on. "AAH!" he continued to scream, as they painfully embedded in his skin, or slammed against his body in the case of blunt weapons. "Oh, no, not a- AAH!"
Lotion had yanked, and pulled him into the air. Just like Ranma days earlier, she pulled him over her head, and slammed him to the ground. She let go then though, and Mousse moved onward, splashing into the pond. A moment later a gaggling GooseMousse splashed on the surface of the water. Mousse was obviously still angry and spread his wing, more weapons at the ready. "Don't you /dare/!" Lotion snapped, pointing at the offending birdman. "Next time I not make weapons go only so deep, you stupid duck!" GooseMousse blinked, and then settled down.
Xander and Ranma had watched the entire exchange. "He's a goose," Ranma pointed out a little uselessly.
Lotion blinked and took the boy in for a moment, then asked him, "You no have enough bruises?"
"Lotion, would you calm down," Xander said, not above admiring the feminine, strong and beautiful body of one of his suitors in the tight dress.
"Sorry," Lotion said, much more perky now, "I get testy when people throw weapons at me."
"Ah, no problem," Ranma said in a very annoyed tone, "go ahead, work your frustration off on me. It seems every girl that likes me, likes me for being a punching bag. I can probably fit you into the schedule too." He then grumbled some more.
"It wasn't that bad," Xander told Ranma, who in response glared at him.
"WHAT'S ALL THE RACKET?" The three, four if one counted the goose, of them turned to the new screaming. Akane had come back out, obviously still pissed.
"Goose-boy attacked me with weapons, for no reason, ass I kicked," Lotion explained, folding her arms across her chest.
"And who the hell are you?" Akane asked the newly arrived 'bimbo'.
"Ah," Xander tried to start, but Lotion had other plans.
"Nihau, I Lotion," Lotion said, giving a bow in greeting as was the Japanese custom, "I one of Xander's girlfriends."
"Lotion, this is Akane Tendo," Ranma introduced disinterested.
Akane's eyes widened, and she asked, "/One/ of /Xander's/ /girlfriend-s-/?" She turned to Xander and glared at him. Xander nodding casually with his eyes closed, didn't notice.
"Hai, Xander wanted pig-nosed girl, she not him then, but do now, defeated me in combat, flat-chested redhead wanted Xander since kindergarten," Lotion explained with a smile, making Xander sigh at the insults and the exaggeration, "Xander said couldn't choose, so date us all till could."
"Of all the . . .!" Akane turned to Xander, practically steaming. The two guys gulped. "Xander-baka! You pervert! You're no better than Happosai! You're no better than Ryoga! Bastard!" Akane pulled her fist back to throw a punch. At the moment she was twisted around, and with a surprised look on her face, got devastating punch to the right side of her chin. She was launched backward a few meters, and crashed to the ground, where she stayed put seeing stars.
"No hurt my boyfriend, bitch!" Lotion stated, pointing angrily down at her. Xander and Ranma relaxed, and looked at the downed Akane.
Ranma then turned to Xander and said, "Did I mention I'm glad you're here? Oh, and can we exchange our Amazons?"
"Sorry," Xander said with a grin.
"Nuts."
"Xander," Lotion said, switching to English. "Shall we go see Tokyo tonight, as we were so rudely interrupted yesterday? At night, we can make it a romantic date."
"Ah, well, you see . . ." Xander said, feeling a little guilty and remembering what tonight had in store for him. "I have some prior plans tonight, and . . ."
"Like what?" Ranma interrupted Xander. "Not with me. I remember friends out."
"Not with Ranma?" Lotion asked with a hurt face.
"Nabiki, actually," Xander said, scratching his head, and feeling himself get hot under the pressure.
"Nabiki?" Ranma asked still in his broken English. "What you want with Ms. Money."
"Yes, what do you want with Ms. Money?" Lotion asked, looking hurt.
"Uh . . ." Xander started. How to get out of this? He wasn't doing anything wrong, but he'd also knew it would hurt Lotion's feelings, and he didn't really want that. "Well, she's made an offer I can't refuse. Fifty-fifty." One-hundred percent true, totally false.
Ranma shook his head. "Americans," he said, misunderstanding as intended.
Lotion looked at Xander disappointed. "We'll go to Tokyo together tomorrow, all afternoon and night long. Ranma will give us a tour during the day, and at night, it's just us. What do you say?" Lotion perked up, and then Akane groaned, coming back to the land of the wakeful slowly.
-----
That evening, after dinner, Xander had gone out, walking to the place Nabiki had chosen for their tryst. As he walked through the Nerima night, and took in the moon, and the houses along the path, he was in good spirits . . . mostly. He was rather annoyed with Lotion. This vacation would have been so much more relaxing if he didn't have to deal with all that baggage.
Then he stopped. He frowned, and looked back. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. A street, a pavement, fences, some trash cans and a box. He was about to turn back forward, but instead turned fully around with a frown. Then his frown turned into an angry look, and he stopped forward. With swift kick the cardboard box was sent flying . . . revealing Sasuke. The little ninja with a rag wrapped around his head, looked up a Xander fearfully. "You!" Xander hissed.
Sasuke swallowed, and said, "Master Kuno Tatewaki asks . . ."
"THEN ASK!" Xander yelled, kicking again, this time sending the pathetic ninja servant flying high through the air. "DON'T SPY!"
"AAAaaahhh . . ." And Sasuke was gone.
"God damned bastard!" Xander snarled, and then took a deep breath. "Calm down," he told himself, turning back around. "You're about to take a girl's virginity, can't be angry . . . and stop talking to yourself." Then stepped onward, taking deep breaths.
After several more minutes of walking, a guy stepped in front of Xander's path, a guy in black trousers, and a blue robe. "I am Kuno Tatewaki, Furinkan High's Blue Thunder master swordsman. I have a question for thee," he spoke, moving his hand through his hair.
Xander's left eye twitched; first the flunky, now the . . . flunky. "/What/ do you want?" Xander asked, grumbling, deciding to humor the guy to hopefully get rid of him as soon as possible.
"I request word of my beautiful, beloved, golden angel Buffy Summers. Please tell me she is alright," Kuno spoke with a cultured voice.
Xander had his fists balled, extremely angry now. "She's not your beloved, golden Angel," Xander all but growled out. "All you managed to do is piss her off by molesting her! But other than that, she's /fine/, and you can forget about her, you . . . you . . . ah!"
"Ah, yes, well . . . I have this letter, in which I explain myself and declare my eternal love for the golden angel. Would you please deliver it to her?" Kuno asked, holding out an envelope.
"NO!" Xander yelled as he threw a perfectly connecting uppercut. Kuno was launched away, into the air, and Xander added, "Use the postal service! That's what they're there for!"
With a painful crash Tatewaki smashed to the ground, and he groaned, "Don't know her address."
Xander walked passed, and told him, "Good." He walked onward, grumbling to himself, "Asswipe. Dipshit! Bastard! Perverts, I oughta- calm down. Virginity, remember? Nabiki doesn't need you to be all aggressive and crap because that perverted, nutcase, assho- stop it! Cool. Calm breaths." Xander whirled around, and yelled, "MENTION BUFFY AGAIN, AND I'LL PUT YOU IN A HOSPITAL, PERVERTED BASTARD!"
Xander turned around once again, and continued walked. "Ah, that's better."
-----
Xander arrived at the motel, and looked at Nabiki standing in front of the cashier booth, twirling the keys. She was smiling, and Xander was surprised. The girl was dressed in a short skirt and tight top, looking mighty appetizing. "You owe me half for the room; 20,000 Yen," Nabiki said with a smile, as she walked over to him seductively.
"Let's get to the room before I start flashing money around," Xander said with a light smirk, taking in the number of the now still keys.
"Ooh, you do know how to turn a girl on," Nabiki returned with her own smile.
Xander chuckled, and she let him to the room close by. She opened the door and they entered. After it was locked and the lights switched on, Xander took in the small room. It could barely contain the bed; which was damn small . . . Xander guessed it was small for Japanese standards, for him . . . his feet were probably going to stick out. Xander gently pulled Nabiki closer to him, wrapping his arms around her waist to the small of her back. He guessed gently at first, then quickly ferocious, which she returned holding the back of his head.
"So," he said after they broke the kiss, "did you have anything special in mind? A way to do this that's best for you? A fantasy? It's your virginity."
Nabiki's eyes sparkled, and then whispered in his ear, "I was thinking I let you take charge; let you take it. You're experienced, I'm a little nervous."
"All right," Xander said, a little nervous himself; that was a big responsibility. He gently pushed her down on the bed, and kissed her neck, then down her collar bone. He found she returned the kisses; to his jawbone. Slowly they stripped each other of the clothing, and he took the time to place a pack of condoms on the nightstand. Xander fondled her breasts, and gently kissed, and sucked on them. Nabiki moaned, encouraging Xander to continue, feeling his nervousness slip. When her nipples were hard, he dipped down, kissing lower on her stomach.
When he reached her navel, he stubbed his toe hard. "Ow," he said, and looked back, struggling with his lower legs, feet, and the raised edge of the bed. Finally having found a comfortable position, he looked back up, and looked in Nabiki's expectant and slightly nervous and concerned eyes. He smiled, and said, "Next time, find a place with a longer bed."
Nabiki chuckled, and then laughed a bit. Amazingly she felt her nervousness slip, but her arousal grow. "I'll keep it in mind," she said, holding her forehead while thinking over and chuckling at the situation. Then thoughts fled her mind, and laughter ceased. "Oh, oh, my god," she moaned and grunted, as Xander's tongue had found her clit without warning, and stimulated her. Just as quickly as it was there, having gotten her attention, he fled from the spot, and kissed and licked her outer lips. They filled with blood, as Nabiki moaned her pleasure. Her hands found his head and hair, and Xander smiled, finding her inner lips. He licked and sucked, the earlier humor having tossed aside his nervousness, now the practice with Willow, and to a lesser degree himself, or rather herself, could take over his actions. "By all the kamis!" she breathed out, as Xander's tongue and lips touched places only her fingers had ever managed touch. "Oh, uh!"
Xander grinned as she felt her riding his face and tongue, her hands desperately holding on to him as she stimulated her vagina. The taste of the quickly increasing vaginal juices was turning him on rapidly as well, feeling his already present erection demanding attention. He ignored, and focused on the delicious pussy he was eating out. "Oh, Xander, that's . . . oh, my, don't stop!" Nabiki moaned, riding harder, and Xander suddenly switched to her clit, licking it with the tip of his tongue rapidly, quickly switching directions, putting pressure on it, but not to much. Instantly Nabiki exploded, pushing her crotch up against Xander, screaming and moaning names of gods and Xander as equals. Her climax pulled through her body, starting at her toes all the way up to her mind, shivering, and rigid. When the pleasure subsided somewhat she fell down, amazed, still feeling the pleasure in the lingering afterglow.
Xander grinned, having gotten her there. He wasted no time. Reaching over he got a condom, and put it on. Nabiki looked dreamily at him, at his muscles, his chest and handsome face, still enraptured by her orgasm. Xander took her by the waist, and powerfully, and smoothly, guided his throbbing gently erection into her, deeply. "Ugh!" Nabiki exclaimed, as she felt her hymen rip, but then Xander was already passed that. The walls of her vagina were pushed aside smoothly, wrapping around Xander's cock. The sensation of being stuffed full warred with the sharp pain, and then Xander was inside, and stayed there. Before she could do anything else, he gave her a deep, passionate kiss.
"Take your time, get used to it," Xander whispered soothingly, exploring her body with his hands, massaging it in the process.
Nabiki's own hands ran almost involuntarily over his, feeling his muscles, and knowing she had made the right choice. She closed her eyes and went to relax, feeling him against her, feeling safe. Her vagina felt full, painfully extended and stretched, but the joy of him on her, and in her overrode it, quickly making her forget about the quick and sudden pain of breaching her hymen. "This . . ." Nabiki started uncertain.
"Yes?" Xander asked gently.
She opened her eyes, and said, "Is good. Feels good. You're good. Fast though."
"Rapid removal of band aid approach," Xander murmured and kissed her, then placed kisses on her upper chest, while he brought up one hand to fondle her breasts. "Time to try movement?" he asked her.
"Yes," she answered without thinking, "yes, please. Ooh!" Feeling him withdraw, made her surprisingly empty, even as her tightly wrapped inner muscles got heavenly simulated. Then gently Xander pushed back inside, and Nabiki moaned. "Faster," she breathed out, "faster."
Not soon after, moans and yells of pleasure from two people could be heard coming from the room, as well as a powerful climax. Nabiki was happy.
-----
The Next Day
Ryoga slumped to a standstill. He wiped the sweat from his brow. Finally he was far, far away. He had walked all night. "Ryoga!"
Ryoga jerked his head to his right, looking through the gate there, and seeing Akane standing just beyond. His eyes widened, and he looked up again. 'Tendo Dojo.'
"No! Not again!" he yelled in horror. Of course, just then, it had to start raining, and a moment later only a piglet remained of Ryoga. It squeaked in horror and planned to start running away from the girl he had wronged, as Xander and Ranma appeared from the left of the gate to watch him; both sweaty with training exertion, and both very female now that the raining had fallen.
"Ryoga!" Akane called sternly, and quickly walked over, picking up the pig by his neck before it could get away. "You're not leaving over this," Akane said, getting Ryoga's clothes with her other, and started walking toward the house. Ranma and Xander followed her with their heads; a little nervous. Granted, the pig - the man, not what he turned into - deserved a good punishment, but being chopped up and cooked was too harsh. "I forgive you, that was an impressive letter," Akane stated, putting the pig under her arm, "you don't have to go."
"YOU WHAT?" Ranma exclaimed in shock.
"Don't you start, Ranma-baka!" Akane snarled at Ranma, and then continued to move onward. "Or I'll beat you up again."
Ranma and Lexa looked with dropped jaws as Akane disappeared into the house. Then they looked at each other. "/I'm/ the one she's still pissed at?" GirlRanma asked in total dumbfoundment.
Lexa shook her head to clear it, then groaned. "I'm a girl half the time, hell, I'm one now," she started, shaking her head in confusion, "but I'll never understand them, ever."
"You said it, Xand, you said it," Ranma added with annoyance.
To Be Continued . . .