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Satisfaction

Chapter 13

By Miki

13.

Atobe couldn't sleep.

He could hear the ticking of the antique clock on his desk, and he glanced instinctively at the electronic one on his bedside table, checking the time.

It was a little after four in the morning, but it was dark outside and his blankets and quilt felt too heavy; weighing him down with their plush goosedown fillings.

He reached over and flicked on the light at his bedside, sitting up and pushing the covers off his legs. He felt restless, replaying his own actions in his head, annoyed at himself and confused. What had he been thinking? It was so unlike him in every way.

And yet, he couldn't help but think that it wasn't a passing feeling… It wasn't the first time he hadn't felt like himself when he was with Yuuta, and it bothered him to think that he didn't have the slightest clue why.

He couldn't understand either why he cared so much about Mizuki. For goodness sakes, the boy was just a silly child with a penchant for last season's shirts and bad haircuts!

Atobe frowned and crossed his arms, leaning back against the pillows and the headboard of his bed. Again, he shut his eyes and replayed the afternoon's scene in his head, wondering what on earth had possessed him to act like his mother, of all people. It was funny how one's thoughts became so disjointed and nonsensical at this time of the morning, he thought.

Maybe… Maybe even more than the fact that he'd actually done something so… so… un-Ore-sama-ish, he felt annoyed because he felt dissatisfied, and he felt dissatisfied because when he was really honest with himself…

Somehow, it didn't feel like enough.

(S)

"I notice you still haven't purchased an alarm clock, Yuuta," Mizuki stated, making a point of staring at his watch.

Yuuta bowed his head slightly. "Sorry I'm late, Mizuki-san," he began apologising. "I was with Aka-"

"Ten laps."

Yuuta looked up quickly. "Huh?"

"Twenty," Mizuki corrected, lips pursed.

Yuuta decided he'd better start running before Mizuki could issue him anything else, though he thought his manager could seriously do with some happy pills. He'd arrived at training on time, and it was Akazawa's fault if he was late onto the court.

Mizuki was just being a jerk, he decided. A grouchy jerk on a powertrip.

Glaring at Mizuki as he rounded the corner of the court, he noted that he was wearing that pink shirt again.

Yuuta was unnaturally glad he didn't own pink underwear. At least his shirts would only come out blue or purple on a bad washing day.

(S)

Atobe played with the keypad of his phone for a moment, fiddling and flicking back and forth between the menu and the address book as he waited for the regulars to hurry up and get out of the clubroom.

Monday afternnon's practice session was due to start in five minutes and Atobe wanted to squeeze in a call to Yuuta beforehand; he just didn't want the entire team eavesdropping on him again.

"Kabaji," he said tersely, arms crossed as he watched Mukahi and Shishido bickering over a pile of clothes.

"Why don't you wash your laundry at home, stupid? Don't bring it here," Shishido was saying.

Mukahi pointed an accusing finger at Shishido. "Don't tell me what to do with my clothes! And that isn't even mine, that smelly sock! Get it off my clothes before they start to stink too!"

Shishido looked at the offending sock and picked it up, sniffing it. "What's wrong with it?"

"I told you: it stinks! It smells like you've been wearing it for a week!"

"It does not! You smell worse anyway! You smell like you tipped a whole bottle of crap on your head this morning!"

"I did not!"

"Bet you did!" Shishido glowered, leaning over Mukahi. "Bet you thought you'd impress some girl but you scared them all away instead."
"Did not!" Mukahi protested, voice becoming louder and louder the more Shishido leaned over him.

His face was turning a bright shade of red; whether from embarrassment or anger, Ootori wasn't sure, but little people sure were scary when they got mad. He was glad Oshitari looked like he was about to do something about Mukahi.

Truthfully, he was probably the only person who could deal with angry little sugar-high redheads. Ootori wasn't quite willing to try.

Oshitari took one look at the pile of clothes and declared that Mukahi was under no obligation to move it since more than 50 sat on Mukahi's side of the bench.

Shishido didn't agree, and told Oshitari so with his fist.

Oshitari didn't get the fist – Ootori did – but he got the message.

He also got laps as Atobe's temper snapped.

"Shishido, Oshitari! Start running now! Ten laps each!"

Gakuto cast a gleeful look in Shishido's direction.

"Twenty for you Gakuto Mukahi!"

"Huh?" The smirk quickly fell off Mukahi's face, replaced by a look of annoyance directed at Atobe. "That's not fair! That's twice what Shishido got and he started it!"

Atobe raised an eyebrow, barely retaining his self-control. "I don't care who started it! Run twice as fast if you want to beat him, but you better start running before I give you twenty more."

Shishido smirked, sticking his tongue out at Mukahi. He should have known not to tease someone with such fast reflexes.

Mukahi's fingers shot out faster than Shishido could react, and Mukahi pinched his tongue.

"Eeeeuuuuhh ohhhh!" Shishido yelped loudly, hands grasping Mukahi's arm and twisting.

"Ah! Stupid idiot! What are you doing?"

"Eeeeuh ooh!"

"Shishido, Gakuto, Oshitari, Ootori! Fifty laps right now!" Atobe barked. "You're late onto the courts and you're behaving like idiots! How old exactly are you Gakuto? Shishido? Let go of each other this instant!"

Oshitari ignored the commotion right next to him, barely giving his doubles partner a glance as he raised an eyebrow at Atobe. He knew Gakuto well enough to know he wasn't going to let go unless Shishido let go first.

"So am I to assume you're running with us too, because I notice you're not on court either Atobe."

Atobe twitched.

"Oshitari, what are you doing this afternoon?"

"You're taking me to eat ice cream," Gakuto interrupted quickly, letting go of Shishido finally.

Atobe closed his eyes and flicked his hair, regaining his control and smirking as he realised he'd be killing two birds with one stone. "Well you're not anymore. Sakaki-kantoku wants some third-years to keep an eye on the first-years cleaning up the equipment sheds," Atobe informed, pausing for dramatic effect. "And you've all just volunteered."

He turned and signalled to Kabaji to open the door for him.

"Why me?" Ootori asked quietly.

"Guilty by association," Oshitari said, shooting Mukahi a look of annoyance.

Likewise, Shishido tried to avoid the look Ootori was giving him. For someone who didn't care for small and fluffy animals, Ootori's puppy dog eyes really worked wonders on him.

"A thousand yen says it's problems with Yuu-chan again," Shishido grumbled loudly.

It was loud enough for Atobe to pause in the middle of the doorway, fingers tightening against his track pants until he was gripping them.

"Bet they haven't even gotten to first base yet," Mukahi said smugly.

Ootori blinked. "We're not talking about baseball, you know."

"It's a figure of speech, Choutarou," Shishido said with a huff and a roll of his eyes.

"At any rate," Oshitari said dryly, "I'm rather surprised Atobe's not batting for the other team. The purple frills always seemed to suggest he might."

"Why? Do the other teams have purple uniforms?"

"Choutarou," Shishido warned, turning around to face him. He placed his hands on both of Ootori's shoulders and stared at him blankly. "How can you not know what we're talking about?"

Ootori blinked. "I… What do you mean, Shishido-san?"

Shishido dropped his head, sighing in resignation. Oh, Ootori was giving him that look again. He knew it without even looking.

"I'll tell you when you're older."

"Tell me what, Shishido-san?" Ootori asked, tilting his head a little.

Shishido looked at him, and then knew straight away that he shouldn't have. "Nothing," he sighed.

(S)

"Why doesn't Kabaji have to run laps?" Hiyoshi grumbled as he jogged past Atobe, taking a rather large deviation from the lap he'd normally run. He picked up his water bottle from the bench beside Atobe as he went past, and made sure to give his captain a dirty look.

"If you have time to talk, I can give you more laps," Atobe frowned. He turned to glance up at Kabaji. "Na, Kabaji?"

"Usu."

"Someone has to count them so they don't try to cheat," Atobe drawled, his eyes watching carefully as the regulars ran their laps. Ootori and Shishido were running in sync. Mukahi was running after them, yelling out various unpleasant things to Shishido as he did so.

Ootori was getting a workout of his upper body at the same time, trying to alternately drag and hold back Shishido as they went around the track. Oshitari was looking entirely too smug for someone who was supposed to be receiving a punishment, Atobe thought. He was making it look rather like routine walk in the park.

Luckily for Oshitari, Atobe wasn't in the mood to force the regulars to stay back for a longer practice session. He'd called Yuuta, who'd picked up his phone and told him he could get to the library by six. That meant Atobe was going to make sure the regulars were duly kicked out of the club on time. He didn't have time to torture them any longer, though he rather wanted to.

He'd been thinking about that incident all day. For someone who was used to thinking only of himself, it was a rather perplexing turn of events. He needed something to distract him from the distraction that was Yuuta.

"Kabaji."

"Usu."

"Get your racquet. Ore-sama wants to play."

"Usu."

Atobe stood up, slipping off his jersey and rolling his shoulders. His muscles felt a little tight; perhaps because he'd been skipping his regular massages as of late. When had he decided to sacrifice those massages? Atobe wondered. Probably since he'd been spending a lot of time with Yuuta, he realised with a little surprise. One didn't have endless hours in the day, after all, but it was odd he hadn't taken note of it before.

Getting a good workout against Kabaji was probably what he needed to relax and clear his head, he thought, smirking in satisfaction as he walked to the courts.

(S)

"Atobe's in a bad mood," Mukahi grinned across at Oshitari. He served quickly, sending an easy ball across the net to his doubles partner.

Hyoutei's tensai gave an amused smile and returned the serve. "I wonder what sort of girl she is, to have Atobe running around after her like this," he mentioned, watching as his ball sailed easily into the back corner behind Gakuto, forcing him to turn quickly to catch it.

"Must be some really scary girl," Gakuto agreed, managing to reach Oshitari's return and send it back to him.

"Draconian, you mean," Oshitari smirked, easily amused at the thought of Hyoutei's captain chasing a skirt.

He sent the ball back across the net to Gakuto, less in the mood for tennis now and more in the mood for prying into personal affairs that were not his own…

He'd have thought Atobe would be playing the field rather than chasing after just one girl, but it was starting to look like the boy was apparently less fickle than they'd thought.

It was a little odd, to say the least, and Oshitari was intrigued.

Gakuto returned Oshitari's ball, equally lazily, recognising the look on his partner's face.

"I want to meet her," he declared loudly, catching Oshitari by surprise.

Apparently they were on the same wavelength.

"But Atobe wouldn't let us," Jirou interrupted, standing at the sidelines and yawning a little. "I think it's supposed to be a secret."

Oshitari and Mukahi looked over at him quickly.

"A badly kept one, if it is," Oshitari noted uninterestedly. He took a few steps towards the net, not caring who was watching their practice match or not.

Mukahi also followed his partner's lead, stepping closer to the net as they lazily hit the ball between them, bouncing it off the face of their racquets as though they were playing ping-pong.

Jirou watched as a look passed between the two boys in front of him, and suddenly regretted having come to watch them.

"Jirou," Oshitari said shortly.

"Yes?"

"How do you feel about conducting some research with us?"

Jirou faltered, looking at the cat-eating grin on Mukahi's face and the smirk on Oshitari's.

A glance told him Atobe was looking their way and frowning, and he quickly excused himself, babbling out that he didn't like research much. He'd heard about Yanagi from Rikkaidai and Mizuki from St Rudolph, and then he'd heard about Inui Sadaharu from Seigaku, and he didn't think he liked the sound of drinking green sludge in the name of science, so if it was that sort of research, he really didn't want to be a part of it, but they could ask Kabaji because he was sure Kabaji wouldn't mind doing that. Kabaji did most things that people asked of him, though you had a better chance he'd say yes if your name was Atobe.

Oshitari and Gakuto watched him go and then looked at each other undeterred.

"I wonder where we should start," Gakuto mused.

(S)

Atobe adjusted his tie, pulling at the knot with one finger so that it loosened a little around his neck.

He checked his watch and took a few quick steps toward the English section of the library, wondering if it was possible it had taken him so long to get here. It felt as though only a few minutes had passed since he'd left Hyoutei, but it must have been at least ten in the limousine. The traffic had been a little worse than he'd anticipated, and Oshitari and Gakuto had been annoyingly persistent in not letting him leave in the first place.

He had no idea what on earth they were thinking, but he was sure it was nothing good.

Oshitari apparently had too much time on his hands, which was why Atobe had made a mental note to look into other ways to keep him busy.

At any rate, now wasn't the time to think about Oshitari.

Atobe rounded the corner of the aisle and recognised Yuuta standing at the end of it, nose stuck – not quite literally – in a book. His stomach gave a funny kind of a flip as he approached, that unnervingly familiar tightness in his chest again.

"Yuuta," he greeted quietly, taking the book from the boy's hands and flipping it over to read the cover.

"Oh… Atobe-san…" Yuuta returned, eyes darting to the boy's face and then hurriedly looking back at the bookshelf again.

"Just 'oh'?" Atobe asked, frowning a little as he quirked an eyebrow in curiosity.

Yuuta shrugged. "What time is it?"

Atobe checked his watch. Technically he was about seven minutes late, but Yuuta didn't really need to know that.

"About six," he answered nonchalantly, tapping his knuckles on the cover of the book. "Rudyard Kipling is a funny choice, don't you think?"

Yuuta blinked, taking back the book and flicking through the slightly yellow pages. "Why?"

Atobe shrugged. "I never liked his works, personally, though you might…"

He trailed his fingers across the tops of the books in front of him, reading the mostly familiar titles. It was funny that he was becoming so familiar with this one aisle of the library. In truth, he could have bought any one of the books kept here. He'd have bought them in hardback as well, as opposed to the cheaper paperback editions that the library here preferred to stock. Not that he blamed them. Public libraries tended to be underfunded. Their lack of funds meant they were often understaffed and still, their small workforces were often underpaid. Books were perhaps not their first priority, then.

"Have you read this one?" Yuuta asked quietly, holding a book out for Atobe's inspection.

Atobe took the book from Yuuta and read the title quickly, blinking at the choice.

"George Eliot?" he asked, looking at Yuuta.

Yuuta nodded and repeated the name, working his tongue around the foreign syllables.

Atobe flicked through the book, frowning. It was probably way beyond Yuuta's level of understanding; the ideas, the vocabulary and the grammar were all quite complicated and even understanding the language perfectly hadn't stopped Atobe from disliking the book immensely.

He gave a frown and put it on the shelf out of Yuuta's reach. "It's boring," he declared, feeling a little more like himself once he'd said it.

"I'd recommend this one personally," he added, taking another book down off the shelf and handing it to Yuuta.

Yuuta gave the book a dubious look, glancing up at Atobe with uncertainty.

"I can't read the title," he said blankly.

Atobe hid his smile. "Then look it up in a dictionary."

"If I have to look up the first two words in a dictionary, how am I supposed to read the rest?" Yuuta questioned, annoyed.

He opened it up to the middle of the text, eyes scanning the pages for words he could recognise.

"It's too hard."

"Nonsense," Atobe retorted automatically, rolling his eyes.

He leaned in closer to Yuuta and pointed his finger at the page. "See? It's not that difficult. The grammar's a piece of cake and the vocabulary is hardly difficult."

"Maybe not for you," Yuuta grumbled, and Atobe smirked.

"Well, you can't all have ore-sama's talents."

Yuuta sighed in exasperation, trying to glare at Atobe. "It's not like you need to rub it in, stupid."

Atobe smirked. "The truth hurts. Get used to it."

"You read it then," Yuuta scowled, pushing the book at Atobe's chest.

The butterflies were back in Atobe's stomach again. He vaguely registered the fact that Yuuta was touching him, though he probably didn't even notice.

The fingers against his chest were pressing against his skin.

They felt warm.

"Already did," Atobe smirked, the quickest response he could think up as he took the book from Yuuta's hands.

Yuuta looked put out and Atobe smiled.

"Read it," he ordered, pushing the book back into Yuuta's arms peering at the bookshelf once again.

"It only took me a day or so to finish," he said offhandedly, picking out a few more books and holding them out absentmindedly toward Yuuta. "I supposed it shouldn't take you too long, although if you get stuck, you can always ring me."

There was silence for a moment, and Atobe held out another book in Yuuta's general direction.

"Mm…" Yuuta finally answered, non-committal and hesitant sounding.

Atobe turned around to look at him and frowned. "What?"

Yuuta hurriedly shook his head. "It's nothing… When are we going to get dinner?"

Atobe checked his watch again. "You're right," he conceded, surprised the last fifteen minutes seemed to have gone so quickly. "We're late."

"Late for where?" Yuuta asked cautiously.

He'd been hoping for a McDonalds meal of sorts – junk food being the order of the day – but Atobe really hated anything that came in a box and not on fine china so Yuuta wasn't keeping his hopes up.

"Like I said, dinner," Atobe repeated, unwilling to give anything else away.

Yuuta gave him a suspicious look.

"Are there snails?"

Atobe blinked. "Do you want snails?"

"No," Yuuta shook his head, eyes wide.

Atobe smirked. "That's what I thought."

"So… no snails," Yuuta clarified, a look of relief on his face.

Atobe rolled his eyes. "How many times do I have to say it?"

"I was just checking," Yuuta scowled, looking away.

Atobe watched him, raising an eyebrow at his childishness. Still, the look on Yuuta's face sent a little thrill of pleasure through him, and he felt smug with the knowledge that Yuuta would get a surprise out of his choice of dinner for the evening.

(S)

The formal dinner Yuuta had been expecting turned out to be pizza.

Granted, it was a 5000-yen pizza, he had to eat it with a knife and fork, and there were anchovies on it, but pizza was still pizza.

And anchovies were easy to pick off when Atobe wasn't looking.

(S)

Yuuta stretched, arching his back and staring up at the dark sky.

Atobe watched as the chauffeur shut the limo door behind them, and then took a few steps towards the lobby. It was starting to be a familiar sight – the dormitory with all its lights on at night.

He couldn't really say that it looked very homely. It was almost more like a hospital; a place of temporary residence where a whole bunch of strangers found themselves living together and bumping into each other in the corridors. At any rate, the lobby certainly smelt like a hospital, as though someone had been cleaning it with lemon-scented bleach.

Atobe looked up at the rows and columns of windows, and wondered which one of them was Yuuta's.

"Coming?" Yuuta asked him, and Atobe nodded, snapping out of his thoughts to look at Yuuta.

"Of course," Atobe said quickly, following Yuuta. "I was just thinking."

"About…" Yuuta prompted.

Atobe hesitated in answering. "You know, I was just thinking that you could always take a look at my library."

"You have a library?" Yuuta asked, looking dumbfounded.

Atobe gave him an odd look. "Well of course I do," he responded quickly, rolling his eyes. "What sort of house would I have if I didn't keep a library?"

"Er…" Yuuta smiled nervously. "Normal people don't have them though…"

Atobe flicked his hair. "Whoever said I was normal?"

Yuuta decided it was best not to answer. Atobe seemed to like rhetorical questions anyway.

"Well, as I was saying," Atobe continued, "you're more than welcome to come and look. Just send me a message when you want and I'll have the driver come and pick you up."

Yuuta couldn't help feeling sorry for Atobe's driver. All he ever did was sit and take orders from a kid half his age. He imagined Atobe dishing out his orders and smiled, having to look away from the boy to avoid laughing. "Okay," he agreed, the corners of his mouth twitching in amusement.

"What?" Atobe demanded, flicking his hair.

"I didn't say anything," Yuuta smiled.

Atobe frowned.

Yuuta raised an eyebrow, and Atobe blinked at the action, a little smile curving the edges of his mouth.

"Shouldn't you hurry in?" he asked, watching as the office man – Atobe hadn't ever bothered remembering his name – fussed about at the door, narrowing his eyes in suspicion at them through the glass. By his watch, Yuuta had about three minutes to get in the door before he got a punishment for being late back on a school night.

"Yeah," Yuuta smiled. "I'm going."

For a moment, neither of them moved.

Then there was a rapping of knuckles on the glass behind Yuuta and he spun around quickly, cheeks turning a bright pink as he saw the guy on office duty pointing at the clock. He wondered if he'd been watching them, and suddenly felt guilty, like a kid being caught stealing from the cupboards before dinner. But it wasn't as though he'd been doing anything wrong, was it?

And then, as he turned back, he realised that Atobe was right in front of him; closing the gap between them.

He felt Atobe's fingers across his forehead before his mind registered the motion, and he flinched a little at the light touch. Instinct or otherwise, he didn't have time to think about it because the next minute, Atobe had jerked back, staring at him with wide eyes.

"What…"

"I…"

They stared at each other, awkwardness evident in the way Atobe put his hand to the back of his neck.

"Uh… I'll send you a message about the library… thing…" Yuuta blurted out, needing to fill the silence between them.

Atobe gave a nod and turned quickly, too afraid to meet Yuuta's eyes. He thrust his hands quickly into his pockets as he walked to the limo, the jerky motion doing nothing to calm his nerves. He managed to make it to the backseat of the limo before he put his fingers to his forehead, leaning forward and squeezing his eyes closed. Goodness, he couldn't understand what was wrong with him – why he was acting like this with… with…

He couldn't even finish the thought; the mere prospect almost too miserable to be entertained seriously…

He pulled his phone from his pocket and dialled the first number on speed dial.

"Kabaji."

(S)

Yuuta touched his hand to his forehead, mind absolutely devoid of any thought. He didn't know what to think. All he knew was that his chest felt tight and his heart was racing like he'd just run a marathon.

For a moment then… He'd almost thought…

It was like in those cheesy romances Nee-san liked to watch, when the guy finally tells the girl how he feels, and she stands there waiting for him, and then…

Yuuta cringed, wondering what was wrong with him. His fingers were tingling, and his heart still felt like it was beating out of his chest.

"Yuuta."

He turned, mouth forming a little "oh" as he realised who was talking to him.

"Hurry up and get inside before I ground you," came the warning tone, and Yuuta stuttered out a "yes", passing through the glass doors to the lobby without another thought of Atobe.

.tbc.