Heey everyone! See, if I get enough ideas, I can update much faster:).
I hope that you'll find this chapter just as funny as I do.
This is my fav and longest chapter I've written so far.
Enjoy!
Chapter 3 - Chase
"Hey! This is not the E.R.?!" Chase said as he walked up the stage. His hair had miraculously grown since the last time I saw him.
"Hello Chase." He blinked and looked at the ceiling.
"Uh...hi?" He answered hesitantly.
"Sit in the chair."
"Why?"
"JUST DO IT."
"Ok ok." Chase did as he was told and sat in the chair. I cleared my throat.
"Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Robert Chase… Is the king of England." Chase blinked.
"Excuse me? I'm from Australia and last time I checked England doesn't even have a king..." Chase answered.
"Details, details… Hey, if you're the king, can I be your queen? I'm your biggest fan!" I squealed.
"No, you can't be the queen. If I would be king, Cameron would be my queen…" Chase said getting a bit annoyed.
"What?!?! You would choose Cameron over me? I am offended!" I yelled.
Chase looked a bit scared after my outburst and said "Okay, you can be my queen…"
"YEEY!" I squealed and then I continued. "Ok, let's move on. We can discuss the wedding details another time." Chase's face got a bit pale after I said that.I wonder why…
I continued. "Robert Chase… He actually has a tattoo of a pink unicorn on his shoulder…
"I was 18 years old and drunk. Then you do stupid things…" Chase answered.
"But if you don't like it, why haven't you tried something to get it off your shoulder." I asked innocently.
"Well… I… Uhm…" Chase tried to think of a good answer.
"You can make up lame excuses in your own time, but I don't have all day…" I said sweetly.
˚˚ "Robert Chase… He performs secret voodoo hair rituals with Wilson.. Using cow blood. Oh, that's why your hair is so amazing!" I squealed.
"I tried that once, but it didn't work…" Chase answered.
"Yeah right… Of course it worked… How else could your hair be so insanely perfect, all the time? Okay, let's continue… WAIT! We have breaking news!"
I picked up a piece of paper and started reading out loud.
"Robert Chase… He has fake hair… WHAT?!?! You couldn't even tell your own fiancée that your hair is fake?!?! That's why your hair is always so insanely perfect!!!" I screamed.
"My hair is not fake! I just put lots and lots of gel in it… And you are not my fiancée!"
"If you say so… But I am your fiancée, soon-to-be-hubby!" I said.
˚˚˚˚"Robert Chase… He has pictures of Foreman everywhere in his apartment… Why would you do that?" I asked.
"I don't have pictures of Foreman hanging everywhere… I have pictures of Cameron hanging everywhere…" Chase answered.
"Well, whoever's pictures you had all over your apartment, they're not there anymore!" I said happily.
"Why is that?" Chase asked. "And how would you know?"
"Because I let them replace the pictures with mine!" I answered.
"There's a camera crew inside your apartment right now. Want to see it?" I asked.
"I don't believe you!" Chase said. "Let me see it!"
"As you wish.." I answered and a TV screen appeared on stage out of nowhere.
The TV flipped on and it showed a few people who were standing in an apartment, looking at the walls, who were covered with a lot of pictures of Cameron.
"Replace the current pictures with mine!" I ordered the crew and they did exactly what I told them to do.
They first got all the old pictures off and then put on wallpaper with my face all over it.
Then, the icing the cake, they hung up hundreds of pictures of me on the walls.
"Yeey! I love it" I squealed. "Well, fiancée, what do you think?"
"Wha… What… What have you done to my apartment?" Was all Chase could say.
"I knew you'd love it!" I said happily.
Chase just stared at the ceiling and muttered. "My apartment… My apartment…"
The TV screen flipped off and then disappeared as quickly as it appeared a few minutes ago.
"Okay, moving on. Robert Chase...He eats kangaroos." At that moment, Allison Cameron ran out onto the stage looking totally pissed.
"HOW DARE YOU EAT KANGAROOS?!." She slapped Chase angrily and stormed off the stage.
"I DON'T EAT KANGAROOS!" Chase shouted waving with his arms.
˚˚ "Anyway," I said with my nicest voice. " Robert Chase… He's House's son. SERIOUSLY? The famous Dr. Gregory House is going to be my father-in-law? That is just so cool!" I squealed.
"House is not my dad… My dad died a few months ago…" Chase said.
"Too bad… I was already looking forward to him being my father-in-law…" I said.
"Anyway, Robert Chase… His favourite movie is Gone with the Wind, because of the dresses. Wow, is that true?" I asked.
"No, it's not my favourite movie! A Walk to Remember is my favourite movie!" Chase said.
"You are so sensitive! I love you!" I squealed.
"Yeah, I'm sensitive. No, you don't love me… You don't even know me!" Chase said.
"I do love you, and you love me too." I said.
"I don't love you! I love Cameron!" Chase yelled.
"Yeah… Right… Where was I… Here it is… Robert Chase...is going on a date with me tonight. YEEEY!!!"
"ARE YOU NUTS? WHY WOULD I DATE SOMEONE LIKE YOU?" Chase screeched.
My voice sounded hurt. "You don't like me? But… But… But I'm your fiancée…"
"No, you're not."
I began to cry. "Sniff… Sniff…"
"...Ok, that is just scary." Chase said.
"Sniff...sniff...Robert Chase... He is heartless." I cried.
"I am not heartless! I just don't like you, because you're spreading lies about me in front of the American public." Chase crossed his arms in annoyance.
"You are heartless! Sniff… Sniff… And you are also a scared little man-child!" I yelled, while I was still sobbing.
Chase looked very scared and decided that this was a good time to run off the stage…
"Sniff… Sniff… Now you know that Robert Chase… Sniff… Is the king of England, has a tattoo of a pink unicorn on his shoulder… Sniff... Performs secret voodoo hair rituals with Wilson, using cow blood, has fake hair… Sniff… Sniff… Had pictures of Foreman everywhere in his apartment, eats kangaroos… Sniff… Is House's son, his favourite movie is Gone with the Wind… Sniff… And the most horrible part… He is heartless…" I cried the last word and then I ran away from wherever I was, to get some more handkerchiefs.
˚˚ - Idea by Marie Terensky
˚˚˚˚ - Idea by Freakygirlhere
Sniff… Sniff… Please don't forget to review and give me IDEAS.
'Cause the more ideas I get, the faster I'll update:).
Next victim is… Cameron!
I can't wait to tortu- I mean, interview her. ˚Smiles sweetly˚ Sniff… Sniff…