16 Intermission II
20 Questions, Asked by the Holy Toad Sage – Part Two
11. Who was your, you know, first? In that sense, if you know what I mean.
(The two interviewees are silent for a moment, blushing brightly and looking anywhere else but at each other.)
Jiraiya. All right! Way to keep it in the team, you two. Moving right along...
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12. Bath or shower?
Taiki. Bath.
Kotori. Shower. Alone.
Jiraiya. (once again looking hurt) You mean you didn't like that either? But I thought we had so much fun, Tori-chan!
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13. Random question: What comes to your mind when you hear this phrase - "Sex on the Beach"?
Taiki. (gives Kotori a studying look, Kotori sneezes, and Taiki looks back to Jiraiya with a cheshire-cat smile) 'Nuff said.
Kotori. Been there, done that, got sand in strange places. Next question.
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14. If you were a fruit, what kind would you be?
Taiki. Mixed basket.
Kotori. Some kind of citrus.
Jiraiya. (muttering) I'm thinking lemon...
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15. What is your signature technique?
Taiki. Combat striptease.
Kotori. (deadpan) If I told you, I would have to kill you.
Taiki. (shudders) Really, she would.
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16. Are either of you... available?
(in unison) No!
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17. What is in your pocket right now?
Taiki. Do you really want to know? (begins placing an array of items on the table, including a comb and other hair-maintenance items)
Kotori. Don't get him started.
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18. Are you too sexy for your shirt?
Taiki. (winks) So sexy it hurts.
Kotori. (glaring at Jiraiya) If you're trying to get me to take my shirt off in front of the camera, dream on, pervert.
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19. Okay, since neither of you are single, how would you rate your intimate life with your significant other on a scale of 1 to 10?
Taiki. 100. (wide grin)
Kotori. (primly) That's none of your business.
Taiki. (whispers off to side) Try about 502.
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20. All righty, last question. It's a commonly held rumor that real ninjas go commando in public. What would you say to confirm or deny this?
Taiki. Boxers, or nothing. Less chafing.
Kotori. Now that's really none of your business.
(Jiraiya pulls a pair of lacy panties out of a pocket and dangles them just out of her reach)
Jiraiya. Oh, so you aren't missing these? I saw them on your clothesline one day and I just couldn't resist...
Kotori. Ooooooh! You wanna know what I have in my pocket, you conniving lech? A can of whoopass with your name on it!
(Taiki hastily swivels the camera away to avoid the impending carnage)
Taiki. Well folks, that was "20 Questions" with your host, the Holy Toad Sage. (loud crunching sound) Ouch, was that the sound of a heart breaking?
Kotori.(yelling back) No, that was cartilage.
Taiki. (winces sympathetically, grumbles) And now back to the story...
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Author's note: Question 20 was inspired by the anime music video "Real Ninjas". Stay tuned, the regular storyline resumes shortly.