Episode 3: The Consequences of Misunderstanding
Spin reluctantly climbs back into the convertible late that afternoon as Chieftain hovers over him. His mood hadn't changed since the two bumped into each other on the bridge.
"You're so high-strung," Spin grumbles.
"Shut up and get Ryu on the line!" Chieftain growls, "I wanna see for myself just how good of a job he's doin' filling in your spot!"
Spin grumbles in annoyance as he began pressing buttons near a small monitor on the right side of the steering wheel. His glance towards the screen only lasted a split second before he threw his hands over it.
"Well?" Chieftain asked.
"Uh..." Spin stutters, "He seems too busy to wanna talk right now." Chieftain's eyebrow began to twitch in frustration, "Maybe we should check up..."
"Forget the check up!" Chieftain growls, knocking Spin's hands off, "I'm sure he's not too busy to have a little one-on-one with..." he then trails off when he sees five dogs surrounding the large chair in the Command room. All of them were wagging their tail in anticipation as they watched something on the monitor.
"It's like a waiting game!" a short haired, brown spotted, white Shih Tzu says in a monotone, child-like voice. He wore a Japanese-print collar with a bone-shaped device pressed against his throat
"How do you think he'll do tonight?" asked a golden retriever. She wore a violet red beret and a denim collar with the same bone-shaped device as the Shih Tzu.
"If Mr. Ippongi's at work, I'm sure he won't mess up this time!" barks a Siberian husky. She had sports shades over her eyes and wore a red collar with the same device pressed against her throat.
Chieftain glares at Spin who throws his hands up in protest.
"Hey! Don't look at me! I ain't the one who let them in!" he retorts.
The dogs turn their heads towards the two, barking and wagging their tail.
"Look! It's Mr. Spin and Mr. Chieftain!" barks a Yorkie. She wore a yellow and white striped beanie hat with a pompom on top, and a dotted collar holding a device near her throat.
"How's Japan, Mr. Spin and Mr. Chieftain!?" barks a black Shiba Inu. He wore a spiked collar with the same device as the rest of the dogs.
"Where's Ryu!?" Chieftain growls, "He said he was gonna watch this place while Spin was gone!"
"He was, Mr. Chieftain!" the husky barks, "But then he was called out to encourage a boy to not wet his bed!"
"That's right!" the Shih Tzu yips, "In order for him to help out, he needs a quiet place to concentrate!"
"And what better way than a quiet meadow in the holodeck!" the Yorkie barks, standing on her hind legs and waving her front paws around.
Chieftain growls as he hits another button beside the monitor, switching to a wide open meadow. They find Ryuta laying on his side with one knee up and his head resting on his hand, snoring so quietly, it was hard to tell if he was actually asleep.
"He looks so peaceful when he sleeps," the golden retriever said.
"But don't forget, he has to be this way if he wants to help that boy become a big kid!" the husky yips.
"Wow, he must be hard at work then," Spin said with a smirk, "I don't think he even knows he's bein' watched." A vein just about jumped out of Chieftain's head.
"Hard at work, eh?" he growls, "Well, allow me to lighten the load!" He reaches into the glove compartment and pulls out a small remote, pressing some buttons lined up on top.
Water began to seep through the grass as the meadow slowly sank into it. Spin cringes as he watches Ryuta go down with the environment, seeming completely oblivious to the whole metamorphic event.
The five dogs stare at the monitor where Ryuta had disappeared into the water, then looks to another monitor on the upper left corner, seeing a boy with brown hair shaved into a bowl-like hair style stir uncomfortably, almost as if he was having a nightmare.
"No...c'mon! You can do it!" the husky whines as all five arch down and drop their tails. After a minute, the boy suddenly springs up, screaming in fright and clutching his blanket to the point of tearing holes into them. He sat up for a few minutes, blinking, pulls the sheets up while looking underneath them, then drops his arms and cries in frustration.
"Aw no!" the dogs whine as they threw their front paws up in horror, "Ouen failed!"
"He was so close too!" the Shih Tzu whines. Ryuta slowly came up, his wild hair limp on his face while his topknot dropped to a high ponytail. His legs dangle below the surface as he swung his arms back and forth so slowly he barely managed to keep his nose out of the water to breathe. He shook his bangs to the right side of his face and glares up at the screen, showing Chieftain and Spin, in annoyance.
"Well, you can thank Mr. Spoiled-Sport for ruining a perfectly good Ouen," he grumbles, breathing heavily from the pressure of the water surrounding his neck.
Chieftain nearly presses his face into the monitor, "Oh, tell me another! It's bad enough that you're going around, taking advantage of people's helplessness to mess with their stuff!" Ryuta rolls his eyes in more annoyance, knowing what was going to happen next.
"Ahou..." he mutters, his voice straining from the amount of time he had his head positioned to keep his mouth above the surface. Not wanting to put up with Chieftain's tirade he stops swinging his arms, dropping them by his side as he slowly sank, drawing in as much air as he could until the water reached his forehead.
"But do you honestly expect me to believe that little snooze-fest was supposed to help some kid not wet his bed everynight!?" by the time Chieftain stopped for a response, Ryuta had already sunk 2ft below the surface, crossing his arms and legs while curling into a sitting position, almost seeming to ignore him, "Hey! I know you can still hear me, Ryu! The water isn't so dense that you could shut me out that easily!"
Two minutes pass before Ryuta finally resurfaced, higher than before, swinging his arms in a circular motion while kicking his legs past each other to stay afloat.
"If you had gone to bed sooner and wound up in the same dream as Takuya, you wouldn't be talking to me like that," he grumbled breathlessly, bringing his hands up to ruffle the water out of his hair. He then stops after getting his hair back into a somewhat spiky appearance and turns his back on Chieftain, rubbing his chin in thought, "Hey! There's a thought; getting you to help him grow up. Not only would that've spared me the unneeded swimming lesson, it'd also knock some sense into you about how we handle our daily routine."
"Wow! That would be cool!" the Shih Tzu yips.
"Yeah! Agent Chieftain, an icon for children to learn how to be big kids!" the husky howls. More veins began to pop out of Chieftain's forehead as he turns and glares at the dogs in the Command Room.
"Command Room! Out! Now!" he barked before glaring back at Ryuta, "And you! If you're going to do your part in keeping an eye on Central, do us all a favor and at least ACT like you're doing a good job of it!" Ryuta drops his hand below the surface and turns his head towards the holographic screen showing Chieftain and Spin.
"What? You don't trust man's best friend?" Ryuta snorts, turning to face the screen, "I'm sure if they understand English, they'd be smart enough to know friend from intruder."
"Got that right!" the golden retriever barks.
"On duty!" the Yorkie yips.
"And on guard!" the Shiba Inu growls.
Chieftain darts his attention back to the dogs, "O!! U!! T!!" he roars, causing the dogs to use their arms to charade the letters, "SPELL IT AND SCRAM!!" the dogs yelp as they scramble out of the Command Room.
"So, these are the Western Ouendan who have been putting our tradition to shame," said a voice. Chieftain and Spin jerk their heads to the back of the convertible, seeing two figures standing a few feet from them. One of them, the hazel brown-haired Ouendan from earlier, stood next to another Ouendan, roughly Chieftain's height. He had white dreadlocks and a cape draping over his shoulders.
Ryuta frowns from the monitor as Chieftain pulls back and turns to face the two unfamiliar Ouendan.
"I've heard there was a second Ouendan dwelling within this city," the tall man said, "Dilettantes from a foreign land who think they can do better than others, refusing to understand why such methods must be taken to maintain the reliability of those who call for them."
"Excuse me!?" Chieftain growls.
"How could people even call these guys Ouendan!?" Shinta complains, pointing towards Chieftain, "They don't even have the appropriate attire to look like Ouendan! So why would anyone want to call on them when they can't even mimic our movements so fluently!?"
Chieftain's anger increases as the tall Ouendan eyes Shinta.
"It would seem that these third rated Ouendan think people would rely on them just because they were responsible for saving us from an alien invasion three years ago. It's not surprising that they would start going around the world, expecting to be called at a moments notice."
Chieftain shook in anger with each kanji and kana that came out of the tall man's mouth, "You...take that back, you sleazebag!" he roared, charging towards the two.
"Uh, Chief!" Spin yelps, "I wouldn't...!"
"Amateur..." the tall man mutters before thrusting his hands out and shouting "osu". The minute the sound hits Chieftain's ears, he comes to a screeching halt, high on his toes and stiff as a statue.
Spin watches nervously as the tall man walks up to Chieftain, grabs him by the necktie and effortlessly flings him over his shoulder. Three blocks down, a blonde, spiky haired woman wearing a pink kimono struts along the sidewalk, carrying a bag of groceries.
"Ha-ha! Won't darling and Mother-in-Law be proud when I surprise them with my special dish!" she laughs seconds before being squashed to the ground by Chieftain's large body. The BA-1 Agent sits up and glares at the tall Ouendan.
"You're dead when I get my hands on you!" he roars. He then looks down at the woman who glares back at him in the most enraged way expressed. Eggshells and yolk cover her chest as most of the other fruits and vegetables were spilled out around her, squashed and destroyed, "What're you looking at, you..."
Spin cringes as the woman grabs Chieftain by the throat, slams him to the ground and starts beating him up in a fit of anger, yelling in Japanese as he tries to explain himself. He then felt a low rhythmic presence and looks towards the sidewalk to see Shinta standing near the car door, giving him the same, frowning look as their last encounter.
The rookie Noble shifts his attention towards the monitor, seeing Ryuta treading in the simulative ocean. His frown increases upon seeing the lead Ouen, a spark of confusion lacing the frustration burning within his spirit. Ryuta just stares back at him, giving no indication of what he was currently thinking.
The tall Ouendan eventually passes by the convertible, barely giving a glance towards Shinta or the occupants inside.
"Shinta! Iku zee!" he barks as he passes by his rookie companion. Shinta continues to stare at Spin and Ryuta before continuing on after the tall Ouendan, leaving the present to stare back in confusion and worry.
"Wait, Kuroiwa-kun!" shouts the director of a general hospital in Asahi Town, "I can't do anything if you quit now!" he exasperates as he slaps his hands on his desk and stands up, "If it's money! I'll pay as much as you..." he's cut off when a letter of resignation flies into his face. The doctor in question, Shintarou Kuroiwa, throws the door open as he shoulders his belongings.
"It's not about money, director," Shintarou exclaims, "I want to do something that matters!" he then heads out the door, "Chao!" and slams it behind him.
A few hours later, he reaches a docking port and climbs onto a ship destined for the country side of Asahi. He as little idea just how big of a job his goal as miracle doctor was going to be...
"Are you sure you don't want any help, Chief?" Spin asked. He had backed the convertible to where Chieftain wound up; his neck, arms and legs bind to a lamppost that had been twisted in the most complicated style ever seen.
"I know how to deal with these kinds of situations!" Chieftain growled, "I'll be just fine!"
"That's what you said five hours ago. That lady must've tied you up good."
"This' nothing, I tell ya! I'll be out of this contraption in a jiff!"
"I'm sorry...I was hoping you wouldn't get involved in this," Ryuta muttered, grabbing Spin's attention as he looks towards the monitor to see him sitting in the large chair in the Command Room.
"I still can't believe they called us preachin' amateurs after only seein' Chieftain's performance," Spin grumbled, "I thought you said we was allowed to respond to the cries outside our country."
Ryuta places his elbows on the armrest and folds his hands, resting his lips upon them, "We did, but they don't know that. Aside from knowing there was another squadron roaming around Tokyo, everything else is new to them. There could've been a million rumors that would lure them into a false sense security so strong they wouldn't even believe their own hearts."
"Well...do ya think they'd change their views if we try to show them we ain't shovin' them off the trust radar?"
Ryuta remained silent for a moment, "I'm not sure at this point. Them, being the newcomers, would pretty much believe everything that flies into their ears, regardless of whether they're true or not. The chances of getting them to understand that we have no intentions of shutting them out would be near impossible unless we do more than just talk friendly to them."
Spin furrows his eyebrows over what Ryuta said, worrying about what would happen if he did manage to confront one of the Noble Squad members and get them to realize how big of a misunderstanding they were hiding behind.
The boat approaches an island a week later. Shintarou glances at his new home in wonder and interest.
"My patients are waiting for me," he said as he sees a crowd forming on the docks, "This Island will have ideal medical treatment for sure!" once the boat reaches the dock, Shintarou proudly steps off towards the crowd, "Everyone, get in line for a medical exam and treat-!"
He didn't get a chance to finish when the crowd all of a sudden washes around him screaming and yelling out various problems.
"It's a doctor-dabe!" one of the citizens shout.
"A doctor has finally come to this island-dabe!" shouts another.
"I'm not sexy at all!"
"My tooth hurts!"
"My daughter-in-law's food is tasteless!"
"I'm troubled by curly hair!"
"My cat isn't speaking!"
Shintarou shoves the crowd back, yelling in aggravation, "Unless you're sick, deal with the other problems yourselves!"
The crowd, unfortunately, didn't buy into his venting and began flooding him again, continuing with their complaints.
"Now he's angry-dabe!"
"What're you saying!"
"It's common sense-dabe!"
"On this island, a doctor is supposed to cure everything!"
"Hurry up and cure us! CURE US!!"
As the commotion continued, Shintarou's chances of becoming a miracle doctor seemed to be washing away from him the more he was pressured to doing things that didn't follow the procedures of modern medicine. Pushed to the limit, he tries to pull himself out of the crowd enough for him to yell at the top of his lungs.
OUENDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!
Later that day, Tsuyoshi strolled along the sidewalk of Yuhi Town, carrying a suitcase of his stuff. His family followed after him, wanting to see him off as he catches a plane to America to start his job. Along the way, they noticed Ebi-yama, wearing his kimono, standing in their way, looking worried.
"Are you sure you don't want any help?" he asked, "You've been stuck there for almost a week now."
"I told you, I can get out of this!" growls a voice, "Now go away!"
"Nya-ha! Is that large cowboy still trapped on that lamppost?" Tsuyoshi's younger brother snickered. He and the other members of the Handa family crowd around Chieftain, still trapped on the lamppost.
"You haven't eaten in seven days," Ebi-yama muttered, "It's a miracle you're still fit."
"I've dealt with rations before!" Chieftain snapped, "This is nothing serious!"
"I still think we should stick a "kick me" sign on his butt," the younger brother snickered.
"And I think you should mine your manners!" Tsuyoshi scolds, glaring at his little brother.
Just then, a red convertible pulls up to the curb near where Chieftain hung. The hood and windows were rolled up, hiding any identity of the driver. Chieftain, growls in anger.
"Where the hell've you been!?" Chieftain complains, "Do you know how long I've been stuck out here, starved to the bone and white on the tongue!?"
"Funny, that's not you said earlier," Tsuyoshi said, almost causing Chieftain to explode with anger.
The window rolls down as Ryuta stuck his head out, resting his elbow on the car door. Stevie Wonder's "Superstitious" plays on a built-in MP3 player beside him, almost seeming to taunt the tall Agent.
"Well, look who just stuck his tail between his legs and whined for his master seven days after biting his hand," he said, "Dawg finally got tired of getting his ass kicked out of boredom?"
"Wow, I didn't know you could drive, Ouen-sama..." the group behind Chieftain muttered, dumbfounded.
"Just because I like walking so much doesn't mean I can't learn how to drive a few vehicles," Ryuta grins.
"How did you start the car!?" Chieftain growled, "You didn't hotwire it, did you!?"
Ryuta stares at Chieftain before turning his head away and rubbing his hair in frustration, "Oh, darn! Why didn't I think of that sooner!? It could've saved me the hassle of figuring out which key started the ignition!"
"Why the hell did you come out here in the first place!?" Chieftain exclaims. Ryuta gave him a stupefied look.
"Your memory must be lapsing from the lack of nourishment," Ryuta said, "Not too long ago, you were complaining about how hungry and thirsty you were. I'm no linguistic, but I think that translates into you screaming for help, hence why I came here."
"Because I thought you were Spin!" Chieftain snarls, "Where is that brat, anyway! He should still be in central keeping an eye on things!"
"Well, if you'd given up a few hours sooner, I wouldn't have asked him to do a favor for me."
"You what!?"
"It's nothing too serious. I just needed him to drop a few things off at the dojo. Half a mile from the city; I'm sure you won't mind waiting until noon for him to finish and come back here to get you." Chieftain growls in overbearing anger as Ryuta grins cockily, "Or, you can cut the wait short by letting me take you to the nearest clinic. I heard a new doctor just washed up and I'm sure he wouldn't mind getting you out of that contraption of a lamppost."
"I'd sooner wait a million years before I accept your help!" Chieftain snaps. Ryuta snorts and pulls his head back into the car.
"See you in a million years then," he said, preparing to put the car in reverse.
"JUST GET ME OUTTA THIS THING!!" Chieftain roars. Ryuta eyes him again before looking over to Ebi-yama.
"Why don't you do the honors?" he asked.
"Um...okay..." Ebi-yama muttered, a bit unsure. He walks two feet from the lamppost, then turns to face it, standing still for a few seconds before taking a deep breath, grabbing his robe and pulling it off, revealing his sumo thong.
Shouting "dosukoi" at the top of his lungs, Ebi-yama charges towards the lamppost, throwing the techniques he learned into one giant movement. Chieftain yelps in shock, struggling to pull himself free seconds before the large sumo slams his entire body into the twisted post, sending it flying down three feet before crashing into another lamppost. Everyone but Ryuta cringe as they saw the whole scenario unfold.
"Oops..." Ebi-yama mutters, "I think I overdid it..."
"Nah, he's fine," Ryuta said, looking towards Chieftain, who's laying lopsided against the lamppost with little Ebi-yama's circling around him, shouting "dosukoi", "He just got a bump on his head, that's all."
Shintarou scrambled into the clinic, slamming the door behind him and resting his back against it to catch his breath.
"These people are crazy!" he squeaked, "I only know how to save human lives, not fix things! That's what vets and mechanics are for!"
"Sure is a long line out there," mutters a female voice.
"Yeah, it's a miracle we got here before it got longer," said another. Shintarou snaps his head towards the sources of the voice to find the Elite Beat Divas, EBA's second unit, sitting in the waiting room, each reading a Japanese magazine.
"There you are! Where've you been!" he shouts, running over to the Divas. The three look up from their magazines, rather confused.
"Are you the doctor here?" asked Starr, the lead Diva with blonde hair, wearing her glasses on her forehead.
"We were told one of our partners was in an accident and figured we look for him," said Missy, the youngest of the two Divas with brown pigtails and freckles.
"That's not important right now!" Shintarou complains, pointing out the window, "I got a lot of people outside who think I'm supposed to cure everything! I don't know what to do!"
"That's...not really our problem," mutters Foxx, the second backup of the Divas with silver hair.
"Don't be rude, Foxx," Starr snaps, "If this guy has a problem with what's going on outside, we should be doing something to help!"
"But if we don't find Chieftain soon, he's gonna be pissed off when we see him again!" Missy mutters.
"That's right," Foxx said, "And Chieftain hasn't had his coffee in over a week. He'll be a monster by the time we find him." Starr muffles a sigh as she scratches her head in frustration.
"Are you sure the clinic'll help me get out of this contraption!?" Chieftain grumbles as he sat in an uncomfortable position in the back seat of the red convertible.
"He's a miracle doctor. He's supposed to cure anything," Ryuta said as he drove through Asahi Town.
"You better hope he does, for your sake!"
They eventually reach a large crowd, spanning nearly five feet wide and full of complaints, half of them sounding dumber than any normal person would imagine.
"Do these people actually think a doctor would fix everything!?" Chieftain grumbles.
"He must be a true miracle if he has a crowd this big," Ryuta said, barely fazed by what was going on outside the car, "At the rate this' going, we could be stuck here all day."
"Then do something to shorten the time!" Chieftain growled, glaring at Ryuta, "I ain't spending another day trapped in this lamppost!" the lead Ouendan meagerly eyes him.
"Chii, you're so picky!" he looks out the window, crossing his arms, "Alright then. If you don't want to wait, we can always resort to crowd control to get inside."
"What kind of crowd control...?" Chieftain asked, sounding uncomfortable. Ryuta placed his left elbow on the edge of the steering wheel and rests his cheek onto his hand, running his right finger in a circular motion along the center of the wheel.
"Gee, I dunno. Seems conveniently placed somewhere in this car, and should be loud enough to open a path to the door."
"Loud!?" Chieftain then noticed Ryuta's finger was starting to spiral towards the center of the steering wheel, and nearly explodes with anger, "Don't you dare, Ryu! If you so much as tap that horn, this lamppost'll go around your neck once the doctor pries it off me!"
Ryuta eyes Chieftain in annoyance, "Well, at least there's one fact both squads can agree on." He sits back and grasps the steering wheel, "Fine, I'll see if there's a backdoor around here."
The car pulls away from the front of the clinic just as Tsuyoshi, Shinta and Kenshin rush towards the back of the crowd.
"Wah! It's so long!" Tsuyoshi yelps as he and Kenshin stare in shock at the long line.
"We gotta find a way in!" he yelps, "If we don't, we'll never be able to help the miracle doctor make a name for himself!"
Shinta muffles a growl as he barges into the sea of patients, pushing them aside as he tries to get to the door of the clinic. The two Noble cohorts cringe as they follow after him.
"Come on, I'm begging you!" Shintarou pleads, "You gotta help me! That's what you're supposed to do when someone calls you!" The Divas look towards each other, seeming unsure of their choices. Shintarou shudders a bit before moving closer to the female Agents, "I'll tell you what! If you can do a cheer for me, I'll treat your friend for free if he's anywhere outside!"
The Divas look at each other again before standing up.
"Alright! You win!" Starr hypes up, "Seeing as we're the only ones who can help you, we'll be more than happy to get you through this!"
Shintarou practically cries as he grabs Starr's hands and holds them up, "YES!! YOU ARE A MIRACLE NO DOCTOR CAN MATCH!!"
The Divas giggle as they start preparing for their performance, completely unaware of the three Nobles standing outside the clinic, all bearing dumbfounded and enraged looks on their faces.
End Notes:
1. As with Life of an Agent, the dogs in this story are based off five of the six dogs I currently own in Nintendogs.
2. "Ahou" means "simpleton" in Japanese
3. "-dabe", according to GameFAQ, roughly translates to "isn't it". Because it's a suffix similar to how Higsby from the MegaMan Battle Network series often ends his sentance with "demasu", I didn't bother having the citizens of the Asahi country side end their sentance with "isn't it?".
4. "Chii" is pretty much a similar way of saying "geez".