A/N: Sorry, it's been awhile, I know. I just lost my muse for a while, but it's back. SO on with the story.
Warning: This is going to be angsty! Lots of blood, some suicide action going on here; so if you no likey, you no readey. Capiche? I don't wanna get blamed for your weak stomach! And no, I don't like flames either. Those shall be laughed at and discarded.
Disclaimer: No, in fact I do not own Furuba. Natsuki Takaya does. If I owned them, there would be some major yaoi changes
Here's the rest of your story
Name: Heart's Despair, Knife's Repair
Rating: M
Author: Gaara's Whore
Sort: Two-shot
The blonde looked so defeated and broken, it hurt Haru; and he didn't know what to do.
"Momiji, calm down. I'm sure we can figure something out." Haru tried.
"NO! I don't wanna calm down!" The broken child spat, "I just wanna be left alone! Please. Just leave me alone."
Haru couldn't think of anything he could say or do to make his lifelong friend feel any better. If he told everyone that Momiji hated Tohru, they would surely hate him; but on the other hand, if he just left it alone, Momiji would end up killing himself. He just couldn't think of a way out for the boy. Suddenly, a thought struck him odd.
"Momiji, why do you think she's tearing up apart?" He inquired, "What has she done to you to make you say that?"
"Kisa and Hiro. They only care about Tohru now. We used to be good friends, but then she steps in and 'saves the day' and now they don't even say hi to me anymore. And Yuki and Kyo too. They used to care about things, you know? Let stuff get to 'em. But now the only time they aren't totally neutral is when they're defending that witch."
Haru wanted to say that he disagreed, but everything the boy was saying was true. And it made scary sense. But still; all that Tohru had done for him in keeping Black Haru from coming out couldn't go unnoticed.
"Now leave me alone, okay? Will you just leave me alone now?" Momiji begged.
"Alright, Momiji. I'll leave you alone for now. Besides, I need to think too."
With that, Haru left. Down the stairs and out the door, so he could at least get some bearings before going up against his friend.
He's gone. He's finally gone. Momiji thought in relief. He ran downstairs and locked the door, waiting for a moment to think of something to do. He knew Haru would be back before the night was over, so he had to do something. He turned off all the lights, and waited for his eyes to adjust to the absolute darkness. He finally went upstairs to calm himself by lying down on his bed. Unfortunately, within a few minutes, he heard a familiar jingle. His cell phone ringtone.
Shit. Shitfuckdamn. This sucked. He got up and went to his phone to look at the caller ID. No. Oh, please, no. How the hell did she know his cell phone number?! He had to answer though, or else she would think something was wrong and come over! He was going to hate himself for this in the morning.
"Hello?" He forced.
"Hello, Momiji! Are you done with your father right now?"
"Yeah, I'm done. Why? Is there something you need?"
"Well, I don't want to be a bother, but you don't think you could ask Hatori-san to come back over here, do you? Shigure-san seems to have hurt himself!"
"Oh, my! Of course, Tohru! I'll tell Haa-san right away!"
"Thank you, Momiji!"
"Of course, Tohru! Anything for you!"
He hung up with a disgusted look on his face. "Oh, my god! Did I really just say that?! I'm disgusting!" He cried, "but I still have to get Haa-san to go over there…"
He quickly dialed Hatori's number, flopping on his bed, and listened to the ringing of the bell for a bit. Then,
"Hello?"
"Oh! Haa-san! It's terrible! You have to go back to the house! Shigure got hurt! At least that's what Tohru said!" And of course, just as he suspected, at the mention of Tohru, he was on it.
"I see. I'll be right over. Goodbye, Momiji."
Always so formal. "Bye-bye, Haa-san!"
He snapped his phone shut, grateful for the silence. Stupid little bitch. Haa-san doesn't even care whether Shigure's hurt of not! He just decides to go running back because Tohru was scared! He squeezed his hand around his cell phone and marched upstairs. If one more person called and it involved Tohru, he was gonna go off the deep end! He just couldn't stand her! He wished that she go back to hell, where she belonged.
"Why can't you leave us alone?" He wondered aloud, "Why do you have to pull us apart like this?!" Tears streaked down his face. Clenching his eyes shut, he made a decision. "Fine," He murmured, "If she wants to play this game, so be it."
Getting up off his bed, he went into the bathroom, staring at his reflection in the mirror. The cursed boy glanced down to the drawer he kept a razor or two in. If that's how she wants it, he concluded. He reached into the drawer and pulled one out, stopping to stare at the beautiful way its sharpened end glinted in the light. Then without warning he slashed himself across the cheek. He bit his lip to keep himself from screaming. Glittering tears sprung up, stinging his eyes, but he blinked them away. He touched his wound, pulling his bloodied fingers to the front of his face to get a good look at them.
"And it's still not enough for you is it? You want me to pour everything I am out for you. Fine. So be it."
He proceeded to slash his arms and legs and chest, blood spattering everywhere: all over the mirror, the sink, and the walls, only to puddle on the floor at his feet; staining them crimson. Suddenly, he heard someone ram the door open. While he was so consumed with himself, someone had been trying to get in. The child spun around, only to come face to face with Hatori and Haru. His eyes went wide.
"Wha-what are you doing here? Haru, what is Haa-san doing here?! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!"
When both men entered the room, they were shocked into stillness; was all this blood really their little Momiji's?
"Momichi, what…why are you doing this?" Haru asked with obvious hurt etched into his voice, "Why didn't you tell us it was this bad?"
"Because you wouldn't care! Even if I DID tell you! No one would care!" He screamed back, "And do you know why?! Because you're all too caught up being HER little minions! Her slaves! She's fucking brainwashed you!"
Momiji was breathing heavily, and Hatori had no idea why the child thought this way. He didn't think that Tohru was brainwashing him, for heaven's sake!
"Momiji. Listen to reason. Do you honestly think that one girl could brainwash an entire cursed family?" Hatori tried, "How can you seriously think like that?"
"That's EXACTLY what I'm talking about!! You're so fooled, you think that you're fine!" The blonde accused, "I know that you're her pet! Do you know why?! Because you fucking laughed at one of her jokes! You don't laugh at anything! And you didn't care if Gure-nee was hurt! You only said you would go because I said that Tohru was worried!"
Hatori had not thought about that. True, it was childish to say that he laughed at a joke was a good reason, but it was. He never laughed. And he really did only care once the child mentioned Tohru.
"Oh my god." Hatori whispered, "Why do you make sense?"
Haru's head had been hanging low over the course of the conversation, but now his head snapped up. "Do you seriously think that cutting yourself is going to solve anything?!" He demanded, "Do you really think that you're helping yourself be doing this?!"
Of course Momiji didn't think that it was helping, but Tohru was determined for him to have no other means of escape. And he be damned if he was going to give up his one escape. Not without the fight of his life. Literally.
"What else can I do?" He replied, "If I tell any of you that I can't stand her, you'll hate me forever! If I just ignore her, you all will pester me about it! I have no other way! And she KNOWS that!!" He was screaming again.
Without warning, the boy lifted up his shirt and pulled the razor to his skin. Both men froze.
"Momiji, think about what you're doing. This won't solve anything." Hatori tried. "Just put the razor down so we can talk."
"Yeah, Momichi. Listen to Haa-san. We can fix this. I promise if you just let us try, we can fix this." The younger teen pleaded.
"No." He decided, "It's too late to fix it. You know it as well as I do. So stop trying to pretend that this can end happily. Because it CAN'T! There's no way for this to end well."
"Please, Momichi! Don't do this. I can't watch you cut yourself. It hurts."
"You should've thought of that before you came storming into my house." The angered teen hissed, slicing his skin from under his right armpit to right above his left hip. Both men instantly looked like they were going to throw up. The sight of their friend doing that to himself was horrid. Haru actually did vomit.
"I can do better than that." The now enthralled boy cooed, "I can do much better."
Reaching into the drawer once again, he pulled out a full fledged butcher's knife. As the edge glinted, the other men, without thinking, dove at the child, tearing the knife from his hands and pinning him to the ground to keep him from trying anything else. While Hatori secured himself over Momiji, Haru called for an ambulance. When the eldest male looked down at the child held under him, he saw that the boys' eyes were glazed over and he was staring blankly into nothing.
The ambulance arrived and even as they were taking him away, Momiji was staring at nothing. While on the doorstep stood two blood covered men, who would probably never truly get over what they just had to witness.
Everyone had gone to visit Momiji one day, even Tohru, but Momiji had simply spat in her face. After that, the only one who visited was Momo, but when she did, her big brother was completely unresponsive. He just lay there in the hospital bed, while his wounds healed.
The entire time, ever since Hatori had pinned him in the bathroom a week and a half ago, he had been in inner turmoil. He didn't know if he should just kill himself, or try to live. The idiot doctors had put him on a pretty high level; 5. Five stories should be enough for a pretty good splat, right? He thought so. But that's where the turmoil comes in. He didn't know if he wanted to die anymore. His sister gave him hope that someone cared. Maybe. Just maybe, he could do this.
Then his sister stopped coming. And his world came crashing down around him.
No, he thought, that's right. No one cares. I almost forgot; I have no one to be there for me. They're all too busy being with Tohru, helping her 'cope' with that fact that I spit in her face. Of course.
He turned his head to the side to stare out the window in silence. Silence. It was overpowering him. Surrounding and enveloping his body and mind until he wanted to scream just to remember what sound sounded like. A salty tear escaped from his blurry eyes; then another, then another. That one tear brought the flood. Momiji began crying. Harder than he'd cried in a long time; more heart-felt.
He tried sitting up, but he collapsed back onto the bed. He refused to accept that, so he tried again, this time with success. Then, slowly, he slid his body out from under the sheets to a full sitting position. He was dizzy, but he had a mission. He couldn't stop now, no matter how little he could see because of his crying. He unhooked himself from all of the machines, and of course not a single nurse noticed. They didn't really care about the kid who cuts himself. He wants to die. They're much more worried about the patients that didn't want to end up like this.
As he shuffled to the window, holding onto the monitors to keep balance, he realized that it was too late for any of them. It was too late to bring them back. They would forever be her little pets, no matter what he might have ever tried to do. This was the only option. His last resort. If he didn't kill himself here, he wouldn't have another chance. It had to be now.
As he got to the window, he threw it open, letting the wind rush up to his face, blowing his golden hair back. He leaned over and looked down. Surprisingly enough, he wasn't afraid. More relieved. He didn't have to put up wit this anymore. Not anymore. He clambered up onto the windowsill and looked down once again. This was going to be the last thing he ever saw. Might as well remember it. So he gave a good long stare into the distance.
Then he fell forward…
The world turns sideways…
The ground rushes up to meet him…
A burst of pain…
Then. Nothing. Glorious nothing.